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NEW VIDEO: Psychologist's WARNING About VIDEO GAMES

Franco Sosa

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  1. Hey everyone, I hope you are doing well. It's really late at the moment I'm writing this so I'm sleepy, but I really wanted to write this. Today I relapsed. Oh well. I could remain sober from videogames since mid february, so it'd be like, 3 months and a half? I did relapse during that time, but I got back up really fast, like a couple hours after I relapsed. But today I installed Terraria and played all day long, ignoring all the tasks and responsibilities I was supposed to be doing. The reason? Lately I've been having many cravings. All my friends from college play many videogames, and often they invited me to play with them. So I think hearing them talk all the time about how cool those games were, or how much fun they were getting, I started to think that I was missing on something important. I was burnt out, and thought that if I could start gaming in moderation, I could have fun with my friends too. I didn't want to. At the start I could deal really well with all these cravings, but with time, it slowly became more hard to manage. I started to miss the games I used to play real much, too. But I think that the thing that made me prone to game again the most, was forgetting my goals. Why I ended gaming for good, what did I want to do with my life. Since the very first moment I started to play again, I knew I shouldn't be doing it, and I started feeling bad. An hour ago, I forced myself to get out from the game and watch one of Cam's videos about relapsing. And then I remembered, and my perspective shifted. Right after watching the video, I uninstalled and completely deleted the game from my pc. I was reminded what I told myself: I gamed enough for life. I quitted for good. I also recalled all the good things I did in these three months: I started excercising everyday, studying for college (I even enjoyed it!), made new friends, and much more! So when I came here, I read Cam's post about relapsing, where it says that we shoudn't see relapse just as something bad, but also as a possibility to learn. And just after reading that, I understood. Between the many reasons I ended up playing again, the main ones were: 1. In my college almost everyone plays games a lot, so it becomes really hard not to have cravings if all the people around you talks about it on a regular basis. At the start I managed to meet many people and make new friends without having gaming in common, though. I learned that even if everyone around me games, it doesn't mean that I'm missing something if I don't do it too. I can still engage and have lots of fun without doing it. In fact, I already did! 2. I was working all the time. I was burnt out. Though I've progressed a bit on giving myself permission to rest or relax, irl it's also very likely that at some point you get bored. But I couldn't bare to be so, therefore, whenever I was bored or got nothing to do, I was thinking about gaming. So, I reminded that it's ok to be bored. It's even good, I'd say, cause then you come up with something to do. In conclusion, all I wanted to say was that it's ok to relapse. It just means you're struggling to better your life, and you just gotta learn from it. If you're depressed and believe that all that effort went to waste, you better think also about the things you did well! Be grateful about all what you achieved in your sober periods, no matter how many or how few they were. And no matter what will happen in the future, the only thing you have to remind is that you're getting better everyday. You. Are. Getting. Better. Believe it, cause it's true. Cause it's what you want. Have a great time!
  2. Hey there, hope you are well. I joined this site recently so I don't know if you keep having this problem or you overcame it. I'm sorry to hear it, I can totally relate. I had many relapses in the past, and I know that feeling of anger against oneself when you think all your progress is gone. But the truth is that it's not gone! If you could get out of it, that's an amazing thing! Addiction is something that I think never really goes out of your life, so cravings can come when you less expect them. You just get better with dealing with them. I just made a post about this. Just some months ago I was in a relapse that lasted like 3 months! I got back up again and STILL I relapsed 2 times again! But this time, it lasted less, cause I got better controlling it. I totally recomend you to try meditation. It's one of those things that help you relax and it also helped me to be more aware of my actions at any time. Hope it helps!
  3. Hello! How are you doing? Making progress aroung here! In the past, when I was trying to overcome my addiction, I would usually go down during a couple MONTHS, or a week if I was lucky. The first days, I'd think "It's ok, I can get back up!", but my actions didn't follow my thoughts, so I'd sort of giving up while deceiving myself. Recovering was a really though thing for me back then. Recently, I had been getting many cravings, since I was stressed. The stress came not so much because of the events of the moment, but more from the fact that I was studying pretty much all the time, but neglecting to have a time to relax or doing other things that I enjoy. I remember thinking in that moment "I'll finish all my tasks first, then I'll relax". Because of this, I relapsed a few days ago. My cravings made me start missing a phone game I used to play a lot. It's called "Brawl Stars" (I stopped playing it cause I realised it was REAL addictive). So, as my phone is already too old to be able to run that game properly, I installed it in my PC, through an Android emulator, and played it right away, when I was supposed to go to sleep. I thought I'd be the beginning of a bad relapse, playing all night and the day after... But instead, I just played 2 HOURS. After that I uninstalled the game, the emulator and went back to normal as if nothing happened in the first place. And yesterday, I kind of relapsed again (but with other entertainment sources). I woke up early, but started the day watching a webcomic. The previous day I wasn't able to watch the new chapter of a series I like, so I wanted to watch it and then keep with my routine as usual, but I got hooked. It was like 6pm when I stopped for a moment and thought: "Oh man, I think I'll lose the day at this rate. I wanted to do so many things today, yet it went so wrong". But then I remembered: "The most difficult thing (for me at least) is STARTING. Just go and start doing the thing, don't think about it!", and so I did. I wasn't able to do everything I wanted to do that day, but still felt great, cause I recovered my day. I consider this 2 events really great accomplishments in my view. Prove to myself that I'm different from the guy I was before, I'm more capable to control my cravings.
  4. Hello there! My name is Franco and I'm from Argentina! I'm happy to meet you all! A bit of my story I was badly addicted to videogames for around 8 years, and I during that time I tried many things to overcome it, but I always failed or lasted for a short time. Since I was a gamer, I know what it is like. You may think you're having fun, that you have many friends, or even that you have a purpose by gaming. I lied to myself every single day with these things, and it was DREADFUL, cause I was aware at every moment that was not the case. That I should be doing something else. That gaming was bad for me. I was reminded by myself constantly about all of my dreams and aspirations that I wasn't taking action towards. And knowing all this, I still kept playing, many hours a day. It started with an old Family Game console, then a PS2, the PS3, and finally, phone & PC games. At the beggining, my excessive gaming habits were just something at the back of my head that I didn't take seriously. But I am a very self-reflective person, therefore as time passed, these thoughts increased in frequency and intensity, until I reached a period where I couldn't bear myself. I wasn't able to enjoy videogames anymore, but somehow I kept doing it. I remember thinking about playing Minecraft, and getting really anxious before I even opened the game launcher. It was nasty. And when you get to that point where you can no longer stand the situation, sooner or later you decide to do something about it. I know that some people, when they hit rock bottom, they decide they no longer want to carry the burden of their lives, and begin to contemplate suicide. I too know there are people that come out stronger than ever before, and even some people became popular or succesful after a critical moment, telling all these crazy life experiences. I didn't have a crazy story, but I had lost faith in myself, and I was really depressed. I felt powerless, as I was in a loop that I created by myself, and no matter what I did, I couldn't bring myself to get out of it. But despite it all, I am a persistent guy. I didn't want to give up. Yes, I was badly addicted, but I couldn't stand the thought of me wasting my life and never achieving anything. To me, that was something that I would never EVER accept. "I have to keep trying", I thought. Like before, I told myself "There has to be a way to end this, for good! To finally free myself from gaming and actually start taking action towards my dreams!", and that triggered something deep inside of me. My stubborness and dreams got me out of there once again... Except that it would finally be different. Someday around mid February this year, I took the decision to stop gaming, and since that day, I seriously commited to it. Yes, I've had relapses, but I recovered. I Want to Help! Sooo, that was my relationship with videogames (I think I was a little dramatic there didn't I? Hehe, sorry). These last years, I did a 5-month challenge to leave videogame addiction, and I also started posting my experience on gaming adiction-related subreddits. Then I found Cam and his amazing YouTube channel, which absolutely blew me up, cause I didn't think something like that would exist. Nowadays (or at least when I started), there's not many people yet who takes this matter seriously. My parents tried to help me at the moment, but couldn't find a way. Many people around me games excessively, but I think that despite the concern about it has increased lately, it's still a topic that has a long way to have the importance and attention that it deserves, especially regarding the dissemination of an effective procedure in these situations. I'm confident that the gigantic growth of the video game industry is difficulting this proccess. So, I turned to this kind of communities, hoping that by sharing some advice or what works for me, I get to help you at least a bit. I will always give my best to offer you an original perspective, something you may not tried before, or something I think is the most valuable to do. Oh, I also love to write, as you can see. So you could expect a REALLY complete answer from me, hahaha! So that's it! I hope I can help you in any way. I'm truly grateful for joining this community! Have a good day, everyone!