NEW VIDEO: I Quit MMOs and THIS Happened
sdf
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Posts posted by sdf
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Yepp, Journey alright..
Where do I begin..
First of, I haven't updated my online diary, because I relapsed. I know that this is not an excuse, but still, this is what happened. Mentally speaking I was in a bad place, so bad that I was actually willing to do anything to get out of it. I went to a psychiatrist. That helped a lot, and I mostly solved my social phobia issues. I am still not where I would like to be, but I am miles further than before
. I actually met a girl, who is currently my girlfriend.Secondly, I now know that I am still not ready to start a detox. Well actually beginning is not the problem, but consistency is. I have decided to allow a little gaming, max 30 minutes every day. I have also placed quite a few fail-safes, so that I will not exceed the time limit. I want to see how I am doing if I know that I can postpone the urges. I am of course open to suggestions from the community or anyone else. Actually I would really like to hear your opinion guys.
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Days 4,5,6:
Maaan, what a looong weekend... I had some family come over. I am tired as hell. The everyday tasks that seemed boring and uninteresting are a bliss right now.
I had a really strong urge in the morning and last night, but I resisted, which instead already made my day
Now I can fully concentrate on the week ahead, and plan my days accordingly. I have been waiting for this..
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Day 3:
All in all I had a great day.
I managed to finish a great chunk of my work, played tennis for an hour with a friend, got a haircut, ran a 10 K and had a great conversation with my sister. On the other hand I had a big fight with my father..
The detox is going well, but I need to be more organized, and plan my days better. This is exactly why I relapsed the first time..
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A friend said that I am strong willed. I was like: "Me??? Are you sure?"
You definitely will be by the time the 90 day detox finishes!
I can see that happening>
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Day 2:
Today wasn't easy.. But I managed somehow.
A think I am changing a lot. My personality is starting to get more likeable. A friend said that I am strong willed. I was like: "Me??? Are you sure?"
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Yepp
Day 1:
Again day 1. I feel a bit disappointed, because I relapsed. Then again,I am not shocked as I really had a stressful day, not to mention that actually caved in under external pressure, and not internal urge.
But, on the other hand I had a really great day, and I am happy that I am in detox again.
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Ok, so I haven't posted my progress for a week, of course I relapsed..
Days 8,9: These days I was still holding on, barely though.
Than I relapsed, I think mostly because of the stress of that day/ week (uni results)...
Than I needed a few days to get back on track.
At least my high-score increased to 9 days, a new record.Yesterday was day 0, I still gamed a few hours, but today I am back. I will post my progress of the day later (hopefully introduced as "Day 1:")
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Doing the worksheets helps, they are the main reason I didn't relapse yesterday.
This makes me happy to know the extra effort I put in to make those has worked!
Yepp, thank you for those!
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Day 7:
Didn't relapse
I was very conscious the whole day, and paid attention to every little thing. In the late afternoon I was getting a bit surprised that the day went so smoothly. Then a type of boredom mixed with tiredness kicked in, along with a strong craving.. It was the first day since I started my detox journey when I didn't go running because I didn't want to. It is not that I like running that much, but I love the effects that it has on me. Instead I just went to bed and slept until morning (8+ hours).
Doing the worksheets helps, they are the main reason I didn't relapse yesterday.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7uMGH3kHhzM
Morcheeba: Enjoy the Ride
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You are doing well!
I am also on day 6.
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You could also try some kind of sports. I personally try to run 5 times a week, for half an hour each time. It gets the blood flowing especially good if you have to sit for extended periods of time, not to mention that it is healthy and you can do it anywhere (ex: not just the gym).
Greetings from Hungary.
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Days 5, 6:
So I am starting to feel like the weekends are easier than weekdays. The cravings are there, for sure, but they aren't nearly as powerful as usually. Again, it might be because I am very family oriented, but relapsing isn't even an issue on Saturdays/Sundays. Yesterday (day 5) was when I relapsed in my last attempt so my 'high-score' just increased
. Tomorrow however will be another story.. In the previous attempt it was on Monday that I relapsed. I wasn't prepared then, I know that now, so this time I will be extra careful. I guess I was still in 'weekend chill mode'
.On another note, I am doing pretty good with 'noFap': day 11, and counting (a personal record). A down side or side effect is that I can get a hard-on very easily (and I mean easy..). Still, better this than impotence (not a necessary consequence, but it might happen).
If any new members are reading this, I am telling you: the detox is worth it! I haven't even finished it, and I am experiencing some major benefits, both on my social capabilities and self image. I cannot recommend it enough. When I was thinking about starting it or not, I was reading a lot of comments on it, like "It is worth it" and "It will change your life" and I thought: "Yeah, sure.. Go tell someone else a bedtime story". I was skeptical, to say the least, and the beginning is especially hard, not to mention that some days are just cruel, but I say it is worth paying this price if it means changing your life and way of living for good. +Awesome community
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Day 4:
I had a great day
.I was very occupied during theday, almost no cravings, most importantly I enjoyed what I was doing and had a great time with friends in the evening. Soooo this is what an easy day looks like..
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Day 3:
@Cam Adair no, I haven't read that one, but another book has just been added to the list
I am starting to get the hang of it I think.. Work has been going well and cravings started to come and go. It seems that I developed a sense for evading situations where I could relapse. It is nothing special, I just know that if I do this particular thing than I will most likely lose control, whereas in the past I doubted myself and started barggaining that it really cannot be that bad. Yes, yes it can be exactly that bad. It might seem strange, but I am a computer scientist, so my work involves being around a computer for 6-8 hours a day. I am fortunate that for me the line between procrastination and actual work is very firm and clear.
Ofcourse doing the worksheets and watching the videos in respawn helps enourmously too.
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Day 2:
Not much to say. It was an easier day than yesterday. I managed to fill in the spaces left out by my program.
It really bothers me that during social interactions my skills are not on par with those of my friends who have been doing this for a long time, but I guess practice makes perfect.
Oh, I forgot to mention that I only relapsed with gaming. The "noFap" side of things is still going strong and today is the 7th day in that detox
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Detox 2nd attempt:
Day 1:
Today was tough... But I pulled through implemented the things that I learned from my relapse and in the end everything went ok. Although there was a moment when I was alone in the house for 1 and a half hour. I literally could not do anything: I didn't want to relapse, so gaming was out of the question (not to mention that I set up some barriers, to make it harder to game); but at the same time I could not do any of the activities that I wrote down against boredom, because I felt so powerless. The only thing that I could do was to sit down and stare at the wall, while an internal battle ensued against the cravings. It wasn't productive but it was a whole lot better than relapsing.
In the past I wasn't a social person, but now I want to change that to. It really helps that I arranged meetings with old friends (class mates) almost every evening.
@Cam Adair thank you for the video on laziness. It really lifted my mood not to mention, that it reminded me that I am not lazy:) As proof I am writing this journal entry right before I would go to sleep, a time period that I usually waste away one way or another.
@WorkInProgress thank you for the kind words, I really hope so!
@Kad Thanks for the tip, no interestingly, I have not thought of fun.. Oh well, I will have to plan something then:))
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Day 5/0:
So today I relapsed (actually I am writing the next day, so yesterday I relapsed).
I don't exactly know what to say.. I guess at one point the craving got too strong and I gave in. It was a very bizarre experience: mentally I was prepared to continue, but it was as if my body was moving on it's own. I wasted 2 hours of the day, not terribly bad considering my past, but enough to restart my detox. In hindsight it could have been much worse. Those 2 hours could have easily been 5 and those 5 hours could have easily been a whole day. So not all bad, if I think about. At least I found out, that I need breaks at well specified periods during my day. Strangely I kind of feel proud, because I had the will power and determination to say no while I was gaming. And currently I am doing better than the last time, since then it took me weeks to restart the detox, whereas now I am right back in it the very next day.
All I can do now is to learn from the experience. I have to be more careful on Mondays, because they are after the weekend, when I am still not 100% back in the right mind frame.
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Although I don't know you exactly (haven't read every journal entry) it seems that you are doing very well.
Congratulations on finishing the detox! Good job!!My humble advice (I might be wrong) is that you have to face these stressful situations and deal with them. It is also what I usually try to do. You have to push your limits. You might even discover that you are great in these situations:))
Good luck, and best wishes!
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Day 4:
So today is a very lazy Sunday..
I completed my last run for this week, in total 28 kms. It feels good, not to mention that I am 6 kilos lighter since I started (2 and a half weeks ago). Of course running or sports are just one half of the success. The other half is diet. And I am not talking about a crazy no carbs, no sugar, nothing tasty diet. What I usually do, is yes, eat less, but eat everything. Have the 3 main eating times: breakfast, lunch, dinner (before 8 p.m.); and if I still feel hungry eat a fruit or salad.I think I am going to read something until I have to go meet up with a friend.
No cravings today either, but I usually spend the weekends with my family, so there is always something to do. Tomorrow will be a tougher day, since there will be more opportunities to relapse (I usually spend around 6-8 hours in front of a computer). -
Day 3:
Thank you everyone for all the support and advices.
@Piotr You are absolutely right, and that is one of the things that I am trying to do. My past does not define me, but my current actions do.
@Cam Adair The book seems extremely interesting, I will have to read it the first time I have the chance.
@gloriousclover Your comment is flattering, and I can only hope to rise to such heights.The more I progress into the detox, the more I discover about myself. Like I don't hate work or reading, it is just that I never had the patience or interest towards it before; or I am not lazy, far from it.
I find that a big part of being successful with this program, is to have a well defined routine every morning and evening, hopefully filled with useful activities. For example for me it is repeat every morning the 3 main reasons why I am doing all this (they are simple, something that I can relate to every day), weigh myself, eat breakfast, go to work (as soon as possible; I have to get out of the house), and do the next task in respawn.
The other, I would say, equally important part is to fill up the rest of the day with activities. They don't have to be useful just do something, anything that is not forbidden by the detox. I for example have a long list of what I could do if I get bored.Today, as it is (was) Saturday, I spent the whole day with my family, and surprisingly I was quite occupied. No cravings today:))
Oh, yeah, I completed my run for today. I have only got one left this week. I plan to do it tomorrow morning, while it is still cool.
P.S.: I decided to extend the detox to porn too. I really don't crave it that much, and I hope this girl that I started seeing will help with the issue:P. But we'll see how things go..
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Day 2:
Thank you guys for the comments, I appreciate it. Yes, you really need to wise about how to tackle this issue in your life.
For me, other than obviously the cravings, the most difficult problem to deal with, is the shame. I am ashamed of my past, but of course now I have to face the consequences. In the past, I lied to my parents, my friends and generally anybody else just to stay a few more minutes in front of the computer. There where days when I gamed / browsed the web +10 hours.
Don't get me wrong, I am glad that these days are in my past and that I am radically changing my life, but still I feel bad about it. There are so many missed opportunities because of this.... I know that everything currently happening to me is normal, but it still shocks me how immersed I was in a fictional world. Naturally that projected itself on to my real life. I really thought that I was something really special, that I could change the world with the flick of a finger. Now I now that, while yes, everyone is unique, only with hard work can you achieve anything.
Compared to how I was, I have changed a lot. Even during last week I only gamed below 1 hour in preparation for the detox.
Anyway, I completed my run yesterday so I have 3 out of 5 runs completed. I managed to fill every hour of the day with useful activities (it really helps that I have to work on my project at least 6 hours every day).
P.S.: The TedTalk suggested by Cam about porn addiction really made me think. I don't watch much porn, once a week, but I am seriously considering undertaking a 90 day detox in that too.
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Day 1:
To be fair, I have probably started the detox earlier, but now I have decided consciously that I want to change my life and live a life that I could only dream of before.
Similarly to many others on this forum, I am dealing with a few issues that emerged thanks to me gaming / wasting time on the internet. Some of these are: social anxiety, extreme shyness, inexperience with people, a fat body, lack of friends. These are just the most prevalent..
I am proud that I started running last week without any particular goal other than to get in shape and lose a few kilos. I was very adamant with implementing a program of running 5 days out of 7. Last week was a success, and this week have already completed 2 days (probably 3 if I complete the one assigned for today).Currently I am working on my final year project, so at least that keeps me occupied in the mornings and afternoons.
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Hi
So this is my second attempt at quitting games. The first time I tried to quit I got to around 9-10 days, a personal record that I wish to beat. After that, my exams period started and later the actual exams grabbed to much of my attention. I know that quitting a daily habit, that actual provided some stress relief, is hard and won't happen over night, but at first I actually expected that all it would take would be my initial effort to start the 90 day detox. I thought that after that it would get easy. I was wrong of course. None the less, I am quite proud of myself, because I managed to keep my gaming at just 1-2 hours a day (where as compared to the past when whole days used to go by without doing anything useful).
Now I that the academic year has ended, I am ready again to start the detox.
Journey diary
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Yeah, thanks. Will do!