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ConstantlyLost

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  1. Day 2 - March 20, 2020 Man it was a slow day being indoors. Did about half of my essay which I plan to finish tomorrow. Alot of course changes. Went outside ot the park to do my workout at the bars. Starting to feel really dizzy being inside. I think I'm going to make some warm tea and do some of my essay outdoors. Going to practice some better sleep habits. Going to read 15m before allowing myself to shut my eyes. I find that I wake up kind of anxious because I don't have a cooldown period for my mind beofre going to sleep. Need to refill on meds tomorrow so I have a reason to
  2. Hey everyone! The city I live in is being locked down, we're told not to leave the house, most non-essentials are closed. I need this log to document my life for the next two weeks at least, although reports indicate we might be stuck for much longer. How quitting games has changed my life :) So I've tried to quit games now for years. I quit starting January 2020 and my life has been made several times better. My grades shot up from a 3~ gpa to a 3.8 sessional. I am stronger than ever before, my mind feels more sharp and I've managed to stay much more on top of things. I have
  3. Day 20 of Game Quitting - Results Wow the last three weeks have been quite a journey. My mood is still really off and on, I honestly don't know why that is. I think I need to sleep at a consistent time every night, but right now that's just not an easy task to ask and you'll see why! Job Yup, I got hired as a charity fundraiser and my boss and supervisors LOVE me. They wanted me to work a day after the interview. They like my charm, how I dress and how articulate and on feet I am. I get above minimum wage and the work is really rewarding. I essentially go door to door asking for
  4. Day 6 of Game Quitting No complaints man. Life has been... great. Got things I need to work on. But seen a large upward trend since quitting games. Less nihilistic, less depressed and wondering what the meaning of my life is. Really enjoying the moment a lot more and more in focus again. Still have anxiety though, but it's getting much better. Gym has been incredible. I'm close to being as strong as I ever was, less back pain and more shoulder congruency. Gaining a lot of size. My tighter shirts barely fit! Starting to believe God again, which is so strange. I was a hardcore at
  5. Day 0 of Game Quitting - I'm Back and This Time with a More Concise Plan Welp, I got banned from my MMO game. I'm pretty glad actually. Not even upset. Been playing that game heavily for the past week and I have to say that I wasn't nearly as happy - let alone fulfilled. The reason I wanted to play again was because I missed the instant pleasure dopamine hits and thought I could have both games and all the progress. The first thing I noticed was that my overall muscle mass dropped significantly in the last week. I was training about 33% less, eating about 40% less protein a day and
  6. Day 0 of Game Quitting It happened, I caved in on Day 14. Haven't really been playing much, something like 20 minutes a day. I don't know how to feel about this to be honest. I don't feel guilty in a sense, I'm glad with the progress I have made and it's not getting in the way of my life anymore. But again, I'll have to see for myself. I'm working through a couple of things in my head, mainly I'm discouraged about the direction of my life. I don't really know why I'm in university, I don't have a goal to do anything with my degree and I'm not sure if I want to switch degrees. I start
  7. I have a few gripes about online dating in general. Like it's really hard to have a successful date. I'm pretty good at keep a conversation going, but sometimes my dates are really quiet or they're really loud and won't let the other person talk. You don't really know these girls, you have no idea who they are, no idea what their voice sounds like, their manuerisms, etc. My thinking is rather than wasting time swiping and making the best profile or taking the best pictures, I'm going to just be more social. Meet more people and eventually it'll happen and if it doesn't, well I would have come
  8. Day 11 of Game Quitting Oops didn't post anything for Day 10, no I didn't relapse. Cravings are still here and they are rather strong - I have dreams of playing games now. Been having a great last two days. I went to Church on Sunday with a friend from my classes and it was actually pretty fun. Met some great people and we had a nice lunch afterwards. It's a huge church with a lot of youth members, it's very involved and overall it's a great community. Not sure if I want to be religious again, but we'll see. Got a ton of school work to catch up on, but now I'm able to actually
  9. Day 9 of Game Quitting I feel like I'm not doing enough. I've substituted gaming with YouTube, porn, movies and the like. I've watched some incredible moves that have changed my thinking and I've learned a lot, so I don't regret that time. But a lot of YouTube I watch is still gaming related, also don't regret that, it's a good way to destress, but I think I can do something better like laying on the grass in the backyard or going for a walk. Been much much more social lately. I think I've had more density in social interactions after I quit gaming since I was a child. I remember my frien
  10. Also a decent fan of JP. The part where he talked about acting on your nihilistic and downward thinking will only make things worse really spoke to me at various points in the past two years. I've realized that even when it's hard, to push through it, you will be fulfilled. Studying for my real estate license and doing university at the same time was the hardest studying I've ever had to do, but now I'm a certified broker and still did 80% of my second year. Still proud of that ? I haven't researched much into addiction, if you can provide me some resources on where to read into that, I'
  11. I dont quite understand your last paragraph, maybe you can elaborate it more. But I agree with a lot of what you've said. I only started to fix my family dynamics after I quit gaming, I would even say I used it to escape this issue. Some of my friends do the same thing, they use gaming as an escape and it became more clear after I stopped. I don't try to convert them, but they do know I'm quitting. I respect my friends and they're a smart group, so I don't want to badger anyone. Many of friends, including myself, are in famlies where there isn't much love or they're from single parents. W
  12. Day 8 of Game Quitting Weekends are rough. I only have 4 days of classes, so from Friday to Sunday, I need to figure out ways to spend my time and keep myself occupied. I'm still not the kind of student that can study an entire day, maybe I never will be, but I think what I'll do is to plan my extended weekends on Friday morning so I have a rough idea of what to accomplish. I won't post that here, because it'll just look like long laundry list and that's no fun to read, even for my own reflection. I want to set up a note taking system in my laptop via Google Drive. I use a Chromebook
  13. I would agree to the parents' remark. Despite what we might say about how we want our partners to be like this or that, we also need an outside perspective or at least introspection about the realties about our own relationship. We also must be weary about acting like our parents in our relationships. When we spot the flaws in our parents' emotional communication skills, we should try to inspect if we have those same qualities so as to not repeat their mistake. Looking back, I put too much pressure on my ex to quit smoking and drinking. I may have had good reasoning, but that doesn't negate th
  14. I agree with you 100%, both people need to be happy and independent to have a healthy and fulfilling relationship. Imagine two relationships: Couple A: Both people live lives that they personally enjoy, they have their own strong values and boundaries. They feel complete in their individual single lives and eventually, after much trial and error, finally find themselves with someone who shares their values. They never settled out of insecurity and a feeling of incompleteness. They are both self-sustaining, but are able to give each other extra support when it's needed. Both people a
  15. Day 7 of Game Quitting One whole week of quitting! The cravings have been rampant. I just have vivid short video visions of my character clearing my weekly bosses and daily bosses. The weeklies just reset and I have to say the temptation was there to jump back online "JUST to do the bosses". But I know myself better than that, I would immediately be back on my old habits. Been feeling a bit off a lot these past few days, no more so than usual. My mood is very inconsistent largely because I'm very sleep deprived. I slept a straight 9 hours last night like it was nothing and almost passed o