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coccinust

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Everything posted by coccinust

  1. I guess this'll work like a kanban board: Overall, progress pretty shit today. Gamed quite a bit (until 5pm) Did some work just now on my essay that's due next month so that's good, hopefully more tonight. Gotta grab a good night's sleep too. Hopefully I remember this tomorrow haha.
  2. Under quite a bit of pressure right now, but it should be exciting Have to resit my exams, and my university application is coming up next month so I have to work extra hard to make sure my personal statement is polished and ready. Even not playing games, I'll need to not procrastinate on other things like youtube because that's not much better tbh. I'm not really sure I'll get into the universities I applied for as they're ranked the top in the world though, sorta just hoping I'll get lucky and one will accept me haha. But I think this episode has taught me to be more responsible for my own life. Ran 7 km in one hour, way better than when I had to stop nearly every km back in May. Progress is nice!
  3. Day 14 (+2 months): It's been a long time since my last entry! I think I've actually been able to slowly replace gaming enough that I can finally stop, although I don't want to jinx it. Every morning, the first thing I do is read a book instead of opening up my computer. I think it's helped me not procrastinate right away. I think the reason why is a combination of summer school (first time I've been in one, with some really talented people -I saw how people were trying way harder than me even though we're the same age), the building up of hobbies I've done over the last few months (drawing, running, reading), and Cam's video on "What if quitting video games is hard?" I think I've always tended to stay away from challenging tasks, even if subconsciously, and my good grades only made it worse (that I was "only" good at maths/science for example, instead of challenging myself to do other things). That video really helped me understand that some tasks are meant to be difficult (as obvious as it seems), and most importantly that we shouldn't give up. So here's my semi-daily drawing that I did in 30 minutes , and thank you very much.
  4. Day 13: Well, I've been doing some things. I've been making regular diary entries in my real diary, although that's definitely not an excuse for refraining from this one. I finished all my exams a week or two ago, and I've been reading at school b/c we're not doing anything Went to the gym for the 1st time in a very long time w/my friends. Can't even lift 15kg haha. I think habitica has really helped me manage my daily tasks (reading, drawing, exercise,etc) and stop myself from procrastinating. I'm not quite sure what to do over the summer though, as I've got a short trip in the middle of the holidays so I can't really do anything. Today my mood was pretty bad b/c we had useless teachers who really shouldn't be teaching imo.
  5. Thank you! I'm trying my best . Yes, I try to do most of my answers on paper. I'm taking public high school exams atm, so I get past papers online. I don't really want to print out the questions as the ink is pretty expensive here ($25 USD for a black cartridge). Highlighting words doesn't work for me because I tend to highlight the entire section , so I typically study by understanding the core concepts first (seeing examples of how/why it happens), then looking at the questions and finding out specifics that I don't know on the internet. The books/notes I have unfortunately only cover the basic information, and usually doesn't explain the material to the depth that I'm comfortable with. The exams results come back in middle of august though, so I have to wait 2 months for the results...
  6. Day 12: Screwed up today pretty hard. Was studying at friend's house, but they were playing video games (I was studying b/c i uninstalled all my apps), even though they said it was a "study" session. However this morning I decided to check out the game they were playing agar.io relapsed and ended up straight up playing for 5 hours instead. damn that sucked. I think I should've left early, as that event triggered me. I want to find some new friends, but most of the other people in my class are either connected by something I have no interest in (football) or aren't better any better than my current friends. Thankfully I got a hold of myself in the afternoon and was able to do a few hours of revision, so that was my only saving grace today.
  7. Welp skipped like a week I've been sleeping pretty early, so I keep forgetting to make a post until i shut off my PC (habits I guess) Day 11: Relaxed for a few days, watching anime, then got back to studying. Have my english exam then Geography the day after. Been starting to draw a little bit during breaks. Used pomodoro very effectively, however I need to focus on actually starting the timer.
  8. Day 10: First day of my exams.I have mixed feelings about today. I screwed up maths REALLY hard, even though it's meant to be my strongest subject. This was partly due to the fact that I didn't check how much time I had left and subsequently ran out of time. It's pretty worrying as I need it to get into uni. However we can only do it to the best of our abilities. I was afraid after I walked home after the maths exam. Fear that I was going to get the same result in other exams. I think I (and society) put too much focus into exams, when it's not a very good indicator of how well we learn. Thankfully, I was pleased with my chemistry because I studied it to death this week. I think I need a better mentality regarding this though. My mom has been VERY supportive of me these past few days, even though she has her own problems to deal with. I honestly can't thank her enough. Tomorrow is the first part of my physics exam though. Whilst I didn't study as much for it, I should be able to get the grades I need. Really sleepy from the revising and the tests. Thanks guys for reading I guess this is another outlet for my thoughts and concerns.
  9. Missed yesterday's again Day 8: 6 hours revision, had to go to school for half a day even though they said it was only going to be one hour (school administration sucks) Day 9: 6km run, 7 hours revision. Tomorrow are the maths and chemistry exams. I revised to the best of my ability already, so I'm not really nervous. I just hope I do well because I want good grades to get into uni. It's going to be the hardest exams for me, as the other exams have like 7-10 days apart, but maths, chem and physics are within 2 days of each other. This journal has really helped me stop procrastinating so much (though I did spend an hour watching stuff exploding, but that's chemical reactions lol) Sleeping early tonight.
  10. Oops missed yesterday's entry: Day 6 Woke up 1 hour too early, sluggishly revised for 5 hours in between naps. Seen my friends after nearly 1 week of maximum isolation . Day 7 ran 6 km. 3 hours revision b/c i went out w/parents for dinner/lunch. 2 days left for exam, and we still have school tomorrow
  11. Day 5: 5km run, got stitches in the last 1km and crawled home 5 hours revision Probably will need to change the habit to getting out of the chair when I'm bored, but this will take some time. I feel very happy that I'm able to not think about gaming most of the time, which frees me up to know more about my surroundings and myself.
  12. Day 4: 6 hours revision Drew some really bad stick figures 5 days to go until exams. It's nice to see how not playing games have allowed me to concentrate on my studies whereas last year I was still playing 4h/day at this stage. Not playing games also allowed me to go to sleep earlier and wake up refreshed and energised. Have a nice day!
  13. I think I get the urge to browse after I finish a question/task, or when listening to music and certain words trigger it. Typically feeling a little bit worn down after revising, but once I start browsing it'll take me 20+minutes to get back on track which is the issue.
  14. Day 3: ran 6km 4 hours revision browsed reddit again, maybe ill try blocking the site
  15. Day 2: 3 hours of revision watched deadpool did 40 ish chemistry flashcards browsed reddit for way too long, will try to read instead tomorrow.
  16. Hi guys, so I'm (finally) starting a journal. I'm one week from taking my exams, so I'm forcing myself to revise for at least 4 hours a day. Hopefully, this journal will help me become more accountable whilst I'm on the net and after exam finish next month I'll hopefully be able to avoid the relapse. Goals: social aptitude, draw better, exercise more. I've been playing MMO's since I was 8, starting with Runescape. I'd get home everyday and play it I sleep. I used it as a way to escape life since I wasn't very popular (I just moved at the time). This persisted through the years, playing many more such as maplestory and LoL. I discovered Cam's YT channel from his Tedtalk, and that was the beginning of (hopefully)the end. Today: Run for 6km Did around 5 hours of revision Watched anime in between(this season is the best I've seen) Browsed internet for 1 hours ish.
  17. Hello guys. I have a sister (in primary school), that mostly only wants to watch/play on her Ipad after school/weekend. I feel she probably got that from me. Whilst I have no problem with her using the Ipad sometimes, it's frustrating to know that she is doing the same thing that I was when I was her age-at the start of my addiction, coming back home only to sit on a chair and play MMO's mindlessly. The content she watches/plays is mostly magic/princess based (e.g. MLP), however she has no motivation to translate that into her own stories or even reading if I encourage her. I want her to not rely on the Ipad as her only source of entertainment, but I have very little idea about how to do it. I tried taking it away from her sometime ago, giving various suggestions about other activites. However she made up excuses on how she didn't like any of them and proceeded to cry to our parents for the Ipad back, which they forced me to give. Is brute-forcing it away from her a bad idea? Please, what should I do? Is there any good guides e.g. blogs or books that I should read? Thank you!
  18. During this detox period, I've stayed away from programming because I felt it might make me relapse (gaming is what drew me into programming in the first place) . I'm not good at it, but I know basic HTML/CSS from highschool and python. I used to want to be a programmer when I grow up, but during this detox period I found out that there are many more choices if you're willing to put in the effort to make it happen. Will learning coding get me addicted to games again? What would I have to do to make sure it doesn't affect me relationship with games? As always, thanks guys
  19. I've just deleted everything after playing mount and blade/kongergate for 3 hours(again). my short backstory: I was practically raised on the PC since i was 8, playing RS/MMO's for the next few years before switching to LoL, which is what I've managed to not play for 3 weeks-ish. I've done nothing for my life, even though I usually get the best grades in my year. I enjoy it when I'm at the computer, yet the moment I stop (even to get a drink) I immediately feel bad and disgusted at my actions. I vow to never play games again, and I set out to delete everything related to gaming on my PC. This happened last week as well, and I feel I'll eventually enter a full relapse. It doesn't help that most of my friends are addicted to mobile games, but I've tried tuning them out. It sort of feels like I have two people inside: one that doesn't want to do anything, and the other one that wants to do everything. Everytime I'm at the PC though, it's always the procrastinator/gamer that surfaces, and the motivated one only appears once I get off the PC (especially when i'm trying to sleep, angry at why i didn't do anything that day, then promising myself to do better tommorow, but I never do (i can't remember most of what i think at night, and it takes me 30minutes to wear out my thoughts before i can fall asleep). I can't really get off the PC, since i have to get answers/papers for the exams in May, but I've been going outside more with my friends lately. What should I do guys? Thank you!
  20. So I just came back from school, and I'm feeling really gloomy. The day went well, so that wasn't the cause. I haven't played any games for the last 3 days-ish (would usually play everyday), and im wondering if thats might be the cause for it or if im just really tired from writing down loads of notes? Thank you guys!
  21. Thanks guys for the helpful replies! I'll stop botting at least until my exams are over. Botting is when you use a 3rd party program to automate tasks for you in a game (usually in a MMORPG like WoW or maplestory to do repetitive tasks like killing mobs or gathering resources). So you can be AFK and let the computer "play" the game for you. Botting is against the rules though, and can lead to your account being permanently banned.
  22. Hey guys, so this is my first post here, but I've been following Cam's videos for a few months now (thank you for being the face of the game quitting scene!) I'm thinking about quitting (or at least tone it down to 1h/day on weekday and 2h/day on weekend -is that still too much?) gaming now that my exams are coming up as that will hopefully provide an incentive to stop me playing. During this time, would it be OK for me to bot? Whilst I understand that it's breaking the game's rules, would it actually be detrimental for me to bot? My PC is bad enough that I can't bot and play at the same time (as in I'll bot instead of playing-sort of a immoral compromise xD), however I will be spending most of my spare time in the next few months looking on the computer. Or would it be better to take breaks when studying to do other tasks (drawing/reading/meditation etc?) Thank you for your help