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About JLouis

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  1. Hello PaulineSinclair, I'm not an expert on the matter, but maybe some of my thoughts could give you some ideas. I agree with SilentQ about doing other activities. It's hard to say not to play video games if there aren't any alternatives. Some other activities you could try: asking them for their help on some chores to make them feel useful, giving them projects like drawing their favorite activity/animal/place and then talking about it, encouraging them to do something creative, like building stuff or inventing stories. Make them feel proud about what they do/create. Also you shouldn't feel the responsibility to keep them busy at all times. Kids get bored easily and when they get bored it's easy to fall back on video games. But they can also overcome this boredness easily. Sometimes they just need time to think of something else to do. Also, if you decide on rules like time limits, that could be a good thing. However, I think you should try to be as democratic and transparent with them. Explain to them, in simple words, why you think it is better for them to have different activities. Take the time to explain the consequences they should have, if they do not respect the rules you set, and enforce those rules firmly but lovingly. For example asking them to take a time off to reflect on why those rules are important. Maybe you could think about removing smartphones and tablets around the house and talk to your friends and family about also doing it when they spend time with your child. Kids mimic what they see around them. Seeing adults spending lots of time on their devices has a huge impact on kids. I don't know if these suggestions are adapted to your child, but I hope some of these ideas could be useful to you. If you feel overwhelmed I'd encourage you to seek professionnal help. Good luck!
  2. Hi everyone, So it is kinda funny for me to be here and write an intro. At first, I thought I'd do this all by myself, but then I guess some support and having some place to write my feelings can't hurt, so here goes! My name is Jean-Louis, I'm 30 years old and I live in Montreal, Quebec. I've been playing video games for longer than I can remember. Got a photo of me in my parents photo album, wearing a diaper and holding my dad's NES game controller... ? I guess that was cute when we talked about it, but now I am just realising how troubling it really is for me. I have never thought of video games as a potential addiction, but I realise how much time I lost, that I could have spent improving my life. Short version: I dropped out of high school at 15, after changing schools a few times... Long version: It all began by getting late to class, not doing homework or doing them at the last possible minute. I am not quite certain when it all began to be honest. I remember getting late to school when I was in my last year of elementary school and I'm pretty sure I didn't do all my homework. Still, I had excellent grades. I then went to a private high school, for which my parents and grand-parents paid quite a lot. First year seemed to go fine as far as I can remember, but second and third year were where the problems began. I got put in detention almost every week in my 3rd year of high school for getting late to class or not doing my homework. I switched schools the next year because of my student record. I eventually switched schools a few more times before skipping class and eventually dropping out. When my parents were trying to find solutions, the only problem that came up was that I was too tired to get up early. Of course, I was always going to bed quite late after long sessions of video games. Short version: I have known many ups and downs, while not being able to acknowledge that I had a video game addiction... Long version: I have had moments when I thought my life was not worth living a few times throughout my teenager years. Many reasons for that could be at cause, but I guess that spending so much time playing video games did not help. I played video games a lot to numb my feelings of despair and anxiety. At the time I thought that "at least i wasn't using drugs or doing anything bad" but I didn't ever consider that gaming was an addiction that was seriously affecting my whole life. At 17 I began attending a youth peer support group. Though it wasn't about video games at all, I apparently changed a lot around that time. My parents said I looked much happier and fulfilled. I also got a job around that time and was also doing other activities that I loved (acting, singing, dancing...). I got involved in the support group as an animator . I finally decided to go back to school and got my high school diploma at age 23. I got into cegep and was acing most my classes for a while. After a year my motivation started to dwindle for many reasons and though I did not consider it at the time, I wonder now how much gaming could have been at cause. Anyway, I changed programs and ended up getting enough credits to get a diploma that would allow me to go to college. So I went to university for about a year and a half with very low motivation. I quit university, at 27 during my second year and took a year to rethink my goals but I thought my motivation would never go back to what it was before. Right now, I'm back in school but I am struggling with deadlines and getting to class on time. Today, I feel that I am just undertaking one of the most important projects of my life. I just admitted to myself that I was a game addict and decided to do something about it. I do believe it will be one of the biggest and toughest changes I will make to my life. I have so many aspirations that went off-course and I really want to get a hold of myself and start working on my dreams. As I am writing this I just achieved my first 24 hours without playing video games, posted about it on facebook to my friends and I just uninstalled the games on my computer. It made me quite anxious to be honest, ? but I believe I made the right choice. I hope tomorrow won't be as hard. I'll be back to tell you more about it! See you soon! ?
  3. Well I guess that took some courage to decide to get rid of your consoles. I hope that this decision will help you get the best out of life! Good luck out there!