NEW VIDEO: Why You MUST Quit Gaming in 2025
BooksandTrees
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Posts posted by BooksandTrees
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Thanks for sharing your story. The others are right, a journal can be very rewarding.
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Might actually be tomorrow. I apologize. We have a submission tonight and I'm working late.
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Sounds good. I'll email you tonight.
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I can view them. Yeah, I work full time as an engineer and try to lead a busy life to avoid gaming sometimes. Do you want me to email my answers or post here?
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It's really hard quitting games when you don't have something to fill the void. I found it's common for most gamers to binge tv shows and anime because they're so encompassing and provide that stimulus and dopamine rush we craved from gaming. I found that I had to focus on activities that could become a lifestyle. I started a podcast about hockey because I love hockey. It takes up 3 nights a week where I can't game at all. I also have something of a finished product each week. I also joined meetup, the app where you join groups for activities. Hiking and board games help me get my craving for adventure and talking with people out in a more realistic way and I've enjoyed it.
My advice to you is be patient and don't beat yourself up for not finding a new way of life yet. Try hobbies and write yourself letters of encouragement like you would to a friend on Facebook or email if they were suffering and you wanted them to feel better.
Good luck and keep planning ahead.
Matt
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I did the 90 day detox and found that it's going to take longer to get this done than I thought. I have a podcast now and have been making a big effort to spend time with friends on weekends and slow down during the week. Unfortunately, I've been paying video games 2 or 3 days per week, but if I have other things to do first I do those. They don't really control my life anymore, which is nice. I'm also not binge watching tv anymore and set it up to do 3 shows per week, 1 episode at a time like we used to do years ago before the age of streaming and binge watching.
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I'll do it, but I'd like to see the questions first and remain anonymous if I choose to answer them if that is ok. I've been very busy with work.
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Hi Jada,
Let me think about this. I will get back to you this weekend.
Matt
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Fantastic summary. Also, thanks for sharing your story. Denial is tough because it's very difficult to stop gaming when there's nothing you can pour your mind into. Take some time to read our articles, stories, and watch songs of cams videos to slowly ease yourself into this realization. It will potentially help your direction.
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Thanks for sharing your journey. I think we both have gone through a lot together and I appreciate your friendship and advice. Good luck with your journey.
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This was a great week for me with the success of my podcast, getting back to the gym, going to special yoga classes, getting chores done for myself, and going for walks outdoors. I'm starting to feel less pressure to do well outside of work because I have attainable goals now. The most difficult part of all these steps is just creating a proper structure for myself because i know how much effort it is going to take.
I've also taken steps to see and make new friends through board games and yoga. Eventually I'll make some through my podcast and going to do more activities, but I'm happy with myself so far.
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I got my first episode of my podcast produced and onto youtube. This is so special for me. Over the past week I've worked hours each day just to get this posted and I enjoyed every second of it. This is the hobby I've been searching for. I kept searching for that special feeling after completing a project and never felt fulfilled or happy. Last night after posting my episode I just felt like I was king of the world. I told all my friends and they all listened. I can't wait to produce more content. I keep working on it and just really enjoy it.
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I got my equipment today. I caught a cold, but I really can't wait to be putting work towards this podcast. Work has been difficult for me, but I am trying to relax and be in a good place mentally. I don't think I am, but I am trying. My posts aren't as long as they were before, but I just feel exhausted mentally and spiritually. I'm trying to be less dramatic and just enjoy life a bit.
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I ordered my equipment for the podcast and created all my social media profiles. I just need to trademark it and begin recording and producing the show! I am so excited. I come home excited now and am eager to get things rolling. I also stayed strong this weekend and set alarms for myself to wake up at 8 Am instead of noon. The weekend feels longer to me. I feel more refreshed and happier. These are big steps for me as I just felt so unbalanced.
I created a new gym routine as well and want to go 3 days per week. I currently plan to go on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays.
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Today was a great day for learning. I realized that I'm being a little too ambitious with this cartoon I wanted to make. That takes dozens of people and several months to produce. Those people went to college full time and got degrees. I am alone and did none of that. I can't be that unrealistic.
I decided to start my second option of creating a podcast about hockey and the NHL. I really enjoy hockey and study it all day long. I love to talk and think the two could gel together really well. I look at today as a positive. I've been trying to do things to make my life easier for myself. I am not hitting snooze anymore. I set my alarm clock across the room. I've been much less depressed because of it. I'm also cooking all my meals again and doing yoga.
I'm going to keep working on this podcast and see if I can get any viewers or donations and see how I can turn this into something good for myself.
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3 hours ago, Phoenixking said:
Day 72
"I'm a bit stressed out, to be honest. It's like there aren't enough hours in a day sometimes. My chores keep piling up. And I'm so tired! I told myself to go to sleep early today. But it annoys me that I'm not able to clean any more or prep for my birthday party more."
I had this feeling all summer and finally took a day to do 4 months worth of bills and mail along with cleaning. Trust me, it's gonna suck, but you'll feel better.
"I'm starting to find it véry hard to care about my work. I just half-ass things sometimes and nobody bats an eye."
This happened to me this summer. Don't make the mistake I did in thinking it was because you made terrible life decisions. You might need some restoration and peace of mind to allow yourself to refocus.
"But it's a great opportunity to see grandma again. "
I saw my grandma for my vacation last week. It was the only two days that i didn't play video games. The days were longer and I remember them better than the times I was playing games. I really enjoyed it and hopefully you will too.
As fate would have it, the improv friend was one block from the store. We've been texting. She'd been doing workshops and teaching and coaching. I am jealous of the fun shit she gets to do. Freelancing is amazing if you have a steady flow of work coming in. It was also a nice excuse to meet up for a bit. We only had about 15 minutes, but it was all I needed. I was unsure about her; I figured she went loco this weekend to compensate for her battle with cancer and het boyfriend dumping her. I saw a smidge of sadness in her eyes, she came across a little insecure but sincere. We both initiate conversations, we crack wise. It's nice. I'm trying not to fall for her, though. I don't want to end up hurt again. But there's something about her I keep wanting to explore. I keep wanting to talk to her. I just want her to smile. I've always had a tiny crush on her. She's not a model, tough. Just average looking. But her personality and her mind? She's so interesting. I would come over waaaay too eager, but I would want to ask her out asap or invite her to my home again or whatever. I'm trying to simmer down a bit. I'm single and this is how I get: tunnel vision. I get a bit anxious because I know that I can easily slip into old bad habits and I don't want any broken hearts or hurt feelings.
I guess there's all of this new attention from girls. I missed this. But I also know that this tends to make my head spin ? I'll have to stay mindful
I finished the day with an improv meeting. About making a format and try-outs and stuff. I missed this. I missed the jokes and being funny and making other laugh. I'm going to LOVE getting back on stage. My first gig is in November. I can't wait!
Let me know how improv goes. I'd love to try doing comedy one day, but I'm afraid of hecklers. I have a vicious temper and don't want to explode on anyone for being a waste of a life. I'd insult them in a cutthroat way until I felt like I made them feel like the smallest speck of life this planet had to offer. I might not be ready yet, haha. Enjoy the women and just learn from it slowly. Always a good experience even if it is stressful.
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I feel a little better today. I just focused on work and talking to family and friends. I realized that I just was so overworked this summer on top of being burnt out from graduate school and life itself. The issue is that I wanted to live and enjoy life a little more, while neglecting the need for restorative activities and behaviors. Instead, I was aggressively trying to push a new life and hobbies onto myself.
The new approach I'm going to talk to my therapist about is just having peace of mind and being restorative and mindful of what my emotions and feelings desire. I think through this I'll find more balance. I feel like I'd go on a binge of anything that I enjoyed because I felt empty and sad. I'd binge eat food (gained 20 lbs this summer), video games (go on 16 hour benders), television (watched 100 episodes of a 1 hour show in 3 weeks), and complain the rest of the time. It's hard to pursue balance and activities sometimes. I say I have no time, but I'd be doing all of these things. It turns out I was sacrificing sleep and nutrition to do these things. On top of all of this I was just beating myself up for being unhappy and a failure.
I'm trying to be proud of myself. Something I'm proud of is not turning out to be a failure. I have a very rewarding and challenging job that barely anyone else could ever dream of doing.
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I appreciate it. I'm so exhausted from thinking about it and everything else that I just want to be at peace a bit and do my daily things without having to compete with others and stuff. I can do great things, but right now it's not realistic to do so many great things without having the capacity to do them.
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Thanks.
I think I just had a difficult summer and didn't know how to cope with the workload I received. I did not like it at all. Video games kind of gave me an injection of life before a dose of frustration. I'm gonna try to stop solving all my problems right away and just be more patient. I think it will help with anxiety. I appreciate the kind words. Not many people care that I am depressed so I appreciate it. I am just trying to keep living and being strong and not beat myself up so much.
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9/9/2018 - Forgiveness and Listening
The past two weeks I have failed myself and relapsed very hard. It started by watching a TV show for 8 hour binge sessions that reminded me of playing games. I then just played games and watched TV. Then I took a 1 week vacation and played games for most of it. I got so upset that I cried and screamed. I then laid down in my bed, trembling as I wallowed in self defeat and anguish. I wrote the last post and then went to a dark place. I followed this by playing another 4 hours of games.
I played the game again because I was so angry and wanted to keep beating myself up and just sit there in that cesspool. I lost every game of Overwatch I played during those 4 hours. I uninstalled the game.
I sat there for a while listening to music and thinking about how I'm not living to my fullest and being upset about it. Life is scary. Now that I don't have college anymore I find it scary that I just go to work and come home. I can't handle that pace of life without something to chase after. This shouldn't be scary, though. I should be excited to keep pursuing new interests and dating. I'm just afraid to be comfortable in life or maybe I'm just afraid of not having a deadline. It's like when you can play video games 5 hours a week during weekdays because of work, but once the weekend comes I can't help but play games for the entire day because of a lack of commitments and activities. If I play a game at the start of the day I can't stop.
I was berating myself and screaming at myself for hours today because of this. WHY? It's time to listen to myself. I can't allow myself to sit here in self defeat. This isn't good. I need to be my best friend. I need love right now. I want someone to be there for me and make sure I'm ok. Since most people are fucking losers and don't care about anyone except themselves, I find that I need to be my best friend. I need to love myself more than anyone ever could because I know nobody ever will love me like I want to be loved.
This is my life. I need to take control. If I have nothing to do, I can't panic about what I'm doing or not doing. I need to just relax. Work on things one at a time and don't panic and play games because I know they're bad. I thought maybe I wasn't addicted to games and could just balance it. 100 hours later I know I'm addicted. It took a few relapses and maybe one day I'll relapse again, but I know I'll be there for myself. Life doesn't have to be scary. I can enjoy it.
Matt
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I need help. I took a vacation to destress from work and all I did was play games. I have all these ideas for this I want to do, but I can't stop gaming. I feel so terrible and don't know what to do. I went 3 months without it and played for 16 hours a day for 2 weeks. I just want to game more than anything in the world. Nothing makes me feel this happy.
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I just blasted loud EDM music in the house and danced away tonight. I don't care anymore. I need to let off steam and just have a blast. I want to go to some dance clubs.
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8/22/2018 - How Do I Keep Trying?
I think my issue is more than gaming addiction and I don't think I'm addicted to gaming. I don't think I enjoy my everyday life. I feel lifeless and lacking passion. I don't wake up in the morning with that fire in my belly and impetus on my heart that propels me to achieve in life. There's no adventure for me. There's no point. I quit gaming so I could just do better at work and I'm not enjoying life at all. I don't know what gives me joy in life. I don't know how to find it.
The reason I can't stop thinking about video games is because they've been the only thing in my life that makes me feel alive. I want to feel alive. I come home from work and I'm so fucking tired! I'M SO FUCKING TIRED!!!!!!!!!!!!
I would feel better after doing some physical exertion, but I don't want to go to the fucking gym after work. What's the fucking point? I'm not training for anything. I need goals, man. I don't think it's healthy in the long run to just get pissed off at life and just go to the gym to work out my frustrations and repeat the process. That's not how you're supposed to fucking live life. That's a joke. Video games gave me these fucking goals to achieve and train for. You need to be this level to equip this weapon, I guess I'll train! That gave me a purpose. Why would I want to drive somewhere after work and just put in all this time? It just feels like more work. Oh, go rock climbing. Why? What's the point?
I want to write my cartoon and book so badly and I just don't have the energy or ability to write until like 9 PM where I'm not angry anymore. Then I just get too angry to fall asleep and need to turn to other bad habits to fall asleep. This is so frustrating. I have so much anger and rage inside me and I suppress it all so I don't have to have fun.
Things I Want To Do In No Order:
- Tell jokes and make people laugh
- Dance or go to dance clubs/groups
- Work out
- Trail Walks
- Rock climbing maybe? I liked it, but idk how much I liked it.
- Go to Concerts
- Play Lacrosse and Hockey again
- Go to the gym
- Hockey Podcast
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Write my Cartoon
- Write
- Animate
- Voice Act
- Music
- Production and marketing
- Write my book
- Have more social friends
- Travel and go on adventures
- Yoga
How do I get the energy and motivation to do these things? I'm not having fun in life and it's pissing me off.
Matt
Dear Diary...
in Daily Journals
Posted
10/28/2018 - Coming to Grips
I have not been fair or honest to myself recently. I made efforts to find new hobbies in life, but once I felt the success of these hobbies, I quickly felt better and thought it was fine to play video games again. I started mixing video games and my hobbies together and finally started just playing video games until 4 AM again. I'm trying hard not to destroy myself for being a failure in this regard. But I have been playing games back and forth for the past 2 months now and it is just proof that if you start playing just a little bit you can spiral out of control and mess up your routines again.
I made good progress with my podcast, but the issue here is that I edit the podcast for the length of its recording time. I would play runescape and do an AFK skill while editing my podcast to make the hours go by faster. This got me back into making incredible exp gains and then just do that entirely. I think solution to this problem might be to draw a picture for my cartoon I put aside or something else. I also started playing and watching TV at the same time. This just fuels my need to play the game passively. This is bad because it makes me feel like I should be gaming at all times instead of just focusing on my one hobby or task.
I'll keep you guys updated my frequently. I was a little ashamed of what I've been doing and just avoided the website entirely because I felt bad.
On a side note, does anyone use the discord to talk?
Matt