So did I quit video games altogether?

Nope. 🙂

But I am playing at a much healthier and more realistic amount.

Soph

Haven't played at all in 3 years.

I still think about playing every single day. I still try to convince myself it'd be fine to break my streak.

In the end, I stick to my guns and I'm much happier for it.

It was a hot day today so I stayed in, literally getting all the fill of the internet I could manage - and when I moved on to a book, I was inspired. Wholly 'finishing' an activity before dark also seemed like an achievement, and so I checked out/in on the status of the groups I've been a part of, figuring also to update here.

I don't expect too eventful a holiday, but will be going for peace and wellbeing. Sending everyone here the same.

~ Matt

My name is Jimmy and today I decided to quit gaming due to the reasons that it has brought me to a depressive and miserable state in many ways, whether physically, mentally, financially and socially. I started gaming 5 years ago after I got divorced and used it as a way to cope with life. Since then I have put so many hours in games that I am ashamed to tell. 

My health had deteriorated and became unemployed for almost a year. I even had previously gotten a Master's degree and but never even started applying for jobs due to the satisfaction that gaming was giving me. I kept jobs on and off and quit them because in my head I hated dealing with people in real life and my social skills had gone down to zero. 

Three months ago I was able to find a manufacturing job and now I have lost about 30 lbs and I am in much greater shape. Until that point, I had almost gotten evicted and lost my car due to my awful gaming habits which brought me to this state. 

I feel that I have realized too late that gaming was a huge problem for me and lost touch with most of my friends in real life and barely have any connections with real people. I feel that I have lost of a lot of opportunities and time while I was gaming which makes me feel that I will never be able to achieve the goals I had in  my life. 

Last night I was feeling so empty and depressed that I couldn't even cry and mostly was just feeling numb and as a loser. I realized that if I want my lifer back and reach my true potential, I need to stop gaming which will be a huge challenge for me but I will hope for your support along this journey. 

I have so many more things to say but I will just keep it short and I will fight my demons with all my might to change and abandon this bad habit for good. Please feel free to comment with any tips or any supportive thoughts. They help a lot, especially for a guy as me who almost has no friends and relies in online friends here. I want to thank you all in advance!

I can't say that it's been easy, or that I still don't constantly think about playing video games, but I can say with certainty that it IS possible to live life without them!

I've had my ups and downs, but overall I'm leading a much happier, healthier life. I've taken up new hobbies, read a ton of books, and am enjoying more quality time with my family.

Don't give up.

You can do it.

It's worth it!

Rules: just post something you did to combat something you're ashamed or embarrassed about. Don't need to write a huge post. 

Are there norms that we take for granted ? Both for male sexuality and video games. Example:  *Men shouldn't express certain feelings  *Sex / video game is a performance; the result is the measure of fulfillment in life   *A man's man stick should always be hard with erection during sex / A person ' s worth can only be seen in a video game's progress and collection .....    

It's possible, people!

I want to wish you all luck in getting where they're going. Fighting addictions to gaming is hard, especially because it so often comes with other addictions beside it. Don't judge yourself for relapses, we're all learning and doing the best that we can. To whoever is reading this, good luck on the path you still have to walk and congratulations on making it this far. Just keep plodding on. 

Good luck on your journey... 

The life beyond is waiting

I hope this thread will serve as an inspiration and a place to share your successes!

What have I achieved since I quit games? What have YOU achieved since you quit games? What can YOU achieve if you quit games?

Yes, I know 1347 days sounds intimidating, but 1347 days are going to pass anyway, so it's best if we make them count. Almost three years ago, @BooksandTrees made a post how his life changed after a year and a half of no gaming. I did the same, except I made the time-span to be almost five years even before I quit games.

---

2018:

I got my first girlfriend ever. I left the army in August 2018. During the time I worked some odd jobs, I streamed games daily and had my first English students, while still studying at the university, even if just once a week.

2019:

The year of my personal reconstruction. I quit games in April 2019. I started my Excel "calendar" in June 2019. I went to Iceland for work in June 2019 and came back in September. I moved out to the dorm away from my parents in November 2019.

There are just a few sentences, but I made some very important steps that year and got a lot more agency and clarity over my life.

2020:

The year of my professional reconstruction. At the same time, I was flirting with three job ideas - Forex, financial advisory firm and its management and English teaching. I didn't continue with the first two.*

I got my English teaching website up. as well as my official registration for English teaching. I started getting some serious (online) English course-load from language schools in autumn 2020. I got my gun license. I switched over to Google Calendar from Excel. I started to let my finances get managed externally. I started get involved with women naturally for the first time, not only via online.

2021:

Got a job I could call a job at this point. I got my bachelor's degree from Economic Geography and Regional Development. I started to passively manage my finances internally. I got some more experience with romantic relationships. I didn't go abroad seriously due to CV restrictions.

2022:

I really enjoyed the time I spent with my Georgian girlfriend. It's hard to say what comes out of my new relationship now. I've done some traveling abroad. I participated in business mentoring.

---

Above is the very basic information about what happened in the last five years and what have I achieved or done. I didn't include anything that happens on a continual basis and where it's hard to track "progress", such as reading books, exercising, writing or family relationships, although I'd say they universally got better from the point where they were when I quit games in April 2019.

Overall, I'd characterize myself as a guy who wants more, who wants to do better and who knows what he wants. It's apparent when I look at the way I manage my work/business, finances and relationships over the years.

I'm not even talking about my mental health. Yes, there are still things I do that I don't like or that I need to do that annoy me, however compared to the time when I was gaming, it is really a breeze.

---

*I didn't continue with the first two because:

a) I was pushing myself to do Forex and financial advisory and management, because they weren't truly my ideas. I have only ever had three job ideas myself: army, streaming games and English teaching. The other ones were interesting fillers, but they showed me what I didn't want to do in the end.

b) I didn't see any money from them. It's hard to start a business with no prior experience in the field and knowing how it works. Gotta be in the first line with the troopers to be a good leader after.

c) I started getting some serious (online) English course-load from language schools in autumn 2020. I was able to do what I really wanted, so I cut the other bullshit.

I can say what I want about language schools now, but I needed them for the last two years, not the least because they provided me a stable paycheck for the work done. I didn't care they charged their clients 20$/hour and paid me 10$/hour. I got the necessary experience to start building my business and to get where I am now at the end of 2022.

In the past, when I was trying to overcome my addiction, I would usually go down during a couple MONTHS, or a week if I was lucky. The first days, I'd think

"It's ok, I can get back up!",

but my actions didn't follow my thoughts, so I'd sort of giving up while deceiving myself. Recovering was a really though thing for me back then.

Recently, I had been getting many cravings, since I was stressed. The stress came not so much because of the events of the moment, but more from the fact that I was studying pretty much all the time, but neglecting to have a time to relax or doing other things that I enjoy. I remember thinking in that moment

"I'll finish all my tasks first, then I'll relax".

Because of this, I relapsed a few days ago. My cravings made me start missing a phone game I used to play a lot. It's called "Brawl Stars" (I stopped playing it cause I realised it was REAL addictive).

So, as my phone is already too old to be able to run that game properly, I installed it in my PC, through an Android emulator, and played it right away, when I was supposed to go to sleep. I thought I'd be the beginning of a bad relapse, playing all night and the day after... But instead, I just played 2 HOURS. After that I uninstalled the game, the emulator and went back to normal as if nothing happened in the first place.

And yesterday, I kind of relapsed again (but with other entertainment sources). I woke up early, but started the day watching a webcomic. The previous day I wasn't able to watch the new chapter of a series I like, so I wanted to watch it and then keep with my routine as usual, but I got hooked. It was like 6pm when I stopped for a moment and thought:

"Oh man, I think I'll lose the day at this rate. I wanted to do so many things today, yet it went so wrong".

But then I remembered:

"The most difficult thing (for me at least) is STARTING. Just go and start doing the thing, don't think about it!",

and so I did. I wasn't able to do everything I wanted to do that day, but still felt great, cause I recovered my day.

I consider this 2 events really great accomplishments in my view. Prove to myself that I'm different from the guy I was before, I'm more capable to control my cravings.

finding a replacement for gaming is hard because it fills so much time.

i've been hearing nostalgic games ost lately and i was absolutely filled with joy, it reminded me my childhood and it was very nostalgic

One year ago I introduced myself here and took up the challenge to deliberate practice art fundamentals for 800 hours in a year. Looking back the amount of hours I set for myself was quite unrealistic but here I am proud of myself announcing that I hit 500 hours mark!

What I've learned about planning:

- it is quite possible to plan out how many hours I'm going to put in a month...

- ... but it is hard to predict your whole year

- focusing on time spent of learning instead of 'I will finish project x by xyz' gives me better results overall and keeps me from burnout...

- ... because the hard truth is when you are lnovice it is almost impossible to plan out when you are about to finish a project/chapter/ whatever

- it is important to include some free time especially for your significant other when planning

What I've finished this year:

- finished drawabox (lesson7)
- finished love life drawing begginer series
- finished my first figuary
- finished the head playlist (basics)
- finished chapter 1 of the "Understanding and Painting the Head" course
- finished drawing 20 asaro heads
- finished drawing 20 simple lay ins
- finished drawing 15 break downs using asaro method
- finished the planes of the head chapter
- finished drawing faces using Rheilly method
- finished the advanced perspective chapter
- finished half of the book 'How to draw' by Scott Roberston (including sketching and studying what I've learned)
- finished half of the book 'How to render' by Scott Roberston (including sketching and studies)
- finished Introduction to composition chapter
- finished most of the Proko Figure Fundamentals (premium course)

Plans for the future:

- I'm going to plan my hours month by month

- I really want to finish figure fundamentals and animal drawing fundamentals before moving on to shading and colour

- hope to do really cool stuff in 2 yours from now

... and that's it! Thank you Cam for creating gamequitters! Thank you people for being part of the community, wish you all well!

Link to my journal: 

It's not a lot but since I'm moving to tackle my phone/ Tech addiction,

I feel that I need to celebrate and remind myself how wonderful this is.

And I need to remind myself that I own every clean day to all of you gamequitters, who show support and stop me from coming back to games.

Thank you @Cam Adair for building this platform. And thank you for never stop raising awareness/ sending the message. Amidst all the corporate marketing for gaming, your appearance/ your message saves lives.

How I Quit Gaming:

I'm currently 441 days free from video games. It took me 150 days to stop having cravings for video games. Before going on this incredible streak, I quit gaming for 5 months and failed. I did it because my two roommates kept playing video games and I had no other hobbies or friends that didn't play video games. I figured I'd try to game in moderation after quitting for 5 months. After just 3 weeks of playing 1 hour a day I slowly went back to playing 6-18 hours a day and became suicidal due to how angry and disappointed I was. Not only was I sick of gaming, but I began to hate my friends online and in real life because of how much push back I got about a "fake addiction". 

Your gamer friends are not your real friends. Most alcoholics or drug addicts will face issues with their "friends" trying to urge them to keep drinking or using with them. It's because they're also hiding from their problems and if they have company doing it then they feel better about it and don't have to change. You can change. You should change if you feel gaming negatively impacts your life. 

I view gaming as a crutch or a leg I stood on when I suffered. I'm a structural engineer so I'll use my field of science for a metaphor here. Pretend the stress and anxiety of your life is a weight (dead and live load). You and your mental wellness are a building. Buildings are weaker to seismic, wind, and snow loads. Pretend those are different stresses in life. If you gain more stress in your life, like wind pushing you to the left, you'll lean on your left leg to stand up so you don't fall over.

If you have tons of stress from work and go home to play video games so you can survive the next day, that's a leg you're relying on. If you quit video games without replacing that leg with one or multiple things to support yourself, then you will relapse because you don't want to fall.

So you need to ask yourself why you're gaming and investigate. I made a huge list for why I quit gaming (my original screenshot from 2018):

I played games because I wanted friendship, accomplishment, and escape (mental environment change). I replaced the social aspect of gaming with board game nights, rock climbing community, coed volleyball, coed floor hockey, exercise groups, yoga, and classes to explore hobbies like music classes and cooking classes. Sure, most of these people never became close friends, but it's not often you become best IN REAL LIFE friends with your gamer friends outside of games. When they or you quit a game, you mostly lose that friend. A RuneScape addict rarely gives up RuneScape to play World of Warcraft. 

I started getting accomplishment outside of gaming by doing better at work. I got recognized by my peers, promoted, and earned raises and bonuses that I'd never received before. I also started 3D modeling and seeing how my progress developed. I became better at the sports I played and became the best player on my team after being average. I can climb more difficult routes in rock climbing now because I learned technique and gained strength. My food tastes way better because I cook now instead of eating frozen meals or junk food.

I was able to escape my stressful environments by watching 1 or 2 movies each week, going to my sporting groups, visiting friends for board games, and you get where I'm going with this. I'm not stressed by work anymore because of it.

Health Benefits from Quitting Gaming:

1. I'm not suicidal anymore
2. I have friends and a social life, which has lowered my depression symptoms
3. I no longer have heartburn. I used to sit and try to increase the rate at which I gained EXP in games and it stressed me out and I internalized all of the stress. I also got angry if we lost a game and had to internalize how much I wanted to yell at teammates if it was a team. This all gave me heartburn. I haven't had heartburn in over a year.
4. I no longer have a "pull" sensation in my head. You know what I'm talking about. When you have free time during the day or night and there's a sensation in your head that "pulls you" back into gaming. That's gone. I just have peace in my mind now.
5. No brain fog. Remember staying up late, gaming for hours, waking up the next day, and not knowing how to solve or do things you'd normally do because you're drained? You just need a nap or something? Maybe you drink redbulls or mountain dew to get some caffeine and sugar to feel better? Maybe you vape or smoke? It's all gone. My mental clarity is unmatched right now. I have a photographic memory now. I'm performing better in analytical situations at work than I've ever performed. 
6. Confidence boost. I can look people in the eyes more now. My social anxiety has plummeted. I'm very popular at work now. My friends that I'm now making are recognizing me as the center of attention and not an awkward side member of the crew who just does what they want and contributes nothing emotionally.

My Advice:

1. Study yourself. You need to investigate why you're gaming and be honest. If you can't find out why you're gaming ask yourself what appeals you to gaming and what you're missing in your normal life. If you still can't figure it out ask your parents, friends, siblings, or mentor figure you're close with if they've noticed you're missing something. They might say you have little to no friends, hobbies, self esteem, etc. It might highlight why you're gaming.
2. Be neutral instead of negative and be positive when you need and deserve it. You're going to struggle immensely when you quit gaming. It probably takes up all of your waking hours outside of school and work. One single activity won't replace it. You can't exercise for 12 hours and you can't read a book for 12 hours. You'd kill yourself. Start breaking up the day. Cooking food gives you 3 hours a day to replace that time and it's beneficial to your health and sensory improvement (smell, taste, look, feel, etc.). Exercise easily. Don't jump into a huge routine. Just go for a walk and track your steps. Start with 1k steps per day and after a few weeks maybe you're at 10k steps per day. I'm doing that now and have gone from 4k a day to 6k a day.
3. Ignore counting each day. It can be exhausting waking up each day and saying "day 5" and then you think about how long 90 days is or eternity is. It can be exhausting and stressful. Just focus on weekly benchmarks. That helped me. I started saying "I'm xx weeks free of gaming" around 20 weeks and my gaming cravings went away completely because I was thinking about it less.
4. Join a community or two. You probably love the people you game, roleplay, or hang out with online. Get out and try new activities and slowly integrate yourself in the community. Don't be a neck beard and just throw stupid opinions into groups either. If you don't know how to act in a social setting here is some advice: Don't talk politics, religion, gender studies, or give unsolicited advice. Just strictly talk about the activity you're doing and once you feel comfortable in that group you can then start talking about other things like movies or other activities.
5. Find people to talk to during the week. Maybe you're close to a family member like a parent, cousin, or aunt/uncle, sibling, etc.
6. Avoid beating yourself up. You are going to be fixing your life. This will make you fixate on other parts of your life. You might try waking up earlier, eating healthier, etc. You aren't going to be perfect each day. If you set goals to eat 4 meals a day, not watch porn, meditate, go to the gym, read,  wake up at 8 AM each day and sleep in sometimes, don't get mad. The more mad you get the more you'll deplete your energy and want to relax later on. This will make you want to escape again. Embrace your new life and give yourself leeway. That's not an excuse to avoid any habits or responsibilities. It's just an introduction for you to attack life and enjoy it more. 4 days of eating healthy is better than 0. 4 days without porn is better than 0. Keep going and understanding yourself.
7. Fix your hygiene. I can't tell you how many times I've felt depressed and neglected brushing my teeth, taking a shower, or moisturizing. I now brush twice a day and shower at least 4 times per week instead of 1 or none. These things are therapeutic and promote self love through self care. 

I remembered reading a cool story about the guy and how he lost a huge amount of weight. He admitted that he "was pretty addicted to World of Warcraft."

Interesting article.

Kevin Creekman

Here is the link of the segment 40 mins in full here:

Looking forward to the responses!