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Saab900S

...and he's back

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Well it's been about a year since I started this process. What got me started last time was an absolute addiction to a technically excellent, but utterly addictive game called World of Warships Mobile. My addiction to that game cost me a shattered iPad, and, furious at myself for destroying $600 worth of hardware, I banged my fist onto my laptop, apparently breaking the motherboard, which will set you back about... yeah, $600 for a MacBook Pro. 

I joined this forum, sold all my ships, deleted the game, and haven't gone back. 

Part of me still feels like an occasional, short game isn't the worst thing. Killing 10 minutes with "Last Day on Earth" or even a round of Candy Crush seemed... manageable. The problem with World of Warships was that there was no timer. There was no downside, from the game's perspective, to playing for two, four, or ten hours straight. In fact, it rewarded me. Different measurements of progress, new ships and features, and always that lure of "one more battle." At least LDOE and CC have timers, and if you want to keep playing, you have to, eventually, start spending money. WOW didn't require that.

So, fast-forward a year, and I see an ad for Call of Duty Mobile. I'd played that on the PC years ago, and later, briefly, on the XBox. I downloaded and tried it out, and OMG was I hooked. The setup, unfortunately, was just like World of Warships: Multiple ladders to climb, new weapons to unlock, with new mods, and no penalty for playing for hours. 

I got pretty good... for an old guy, quickly reaching level 125 (out of 150). But something weird happened: Either I suddenly got way worse, or the other players all of a sudden got way better, or some kind of cheat came out, because I went from almost always scoring at #1 or #2 in a match to routinely finishing last, sometimes with no kills. Which, I realize now, was a blessing: I no longer was enjoying the game, and was in fact getting frustrated. I hadn't broken anything -- yet -- but I knew the four hours a day I was spending playing this stupid game should be spent elsewhere. I deleted it a little over 24 hours ago. And I've been so tempted to pick up the iPad and play "just one round" to see if I still had my mojo, but have resisted it. I almost went so far as to mail my iPad to a friend in California, with instructions to mail it back to me in a week, but so far that kind of drama hasn't been necessary.

Tomorrow I'll count off 48 hours, then Thursday it'll be 72, and before I know it, it will be a week.

Tonight I organized my home office, assembled some shelves that have been sitting around for a month, and put together a box of giveaways for GoodWill. All time that I would have spent playing Call of Duty on any other night.

I can beat this.

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Day 2/90 (or, 2.2% of the way there).

Is it 90 days to break a habit? Or 21? Or 254? Science gives us a lot of different answers. But 90 sounds about right. That would be March 16, 2020. The day before St Patrick's Day -- if (when) I can look back at Dec 2019, and say "Yeah, that's the day I stopped playing addictive computer games," I can look forward to a celebratory Guinness the next day. Seems fair, yes?

Had dreams about Call of Duty last night. True story -- the dream took place in the "Battle Royale" scenario, where I was talking to co-workers in the game scenario. Weird. But so far, no re-install.

Tomorrow's gonna be tough, as I start my first day of "use or lose" vacation days. Free time is tempting time, so I think I'll get my car inspected and do some Christmas shopping to take up the day.

 

Edited by Saab900S
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Celebratory Guinness is always a great reason to do something!

Congrats on escaping the cycle again, that's huge. The urge to play never really goes away, but the more self-awareness you can build to be able to get back to reality after a setback is the key to successfully overcoming this addiction in the long term.

Keep it up!

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wait a minute ! u are member since 20 December of 2018 ! i have read it wrongly ! thought it was 2019 !

anyway we are glad to see you here again ! few people come back here after relapsing ,

8 hours ago, Saab900S said:

Day 2/90 (or, 2.2% of the way there).

I can give you a trick that might help you , just open google and write count up timer , there u u will find websites that automatically count up your days . 
Peace

 

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