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Posts posted by happykhan

  1. Yeah it's a tough to balance all the commitments.

    As I've gotten older I've found that the number of commitments increase and it's very easy to get swamped. 

    It's weird because I was usually very good at multitasking in games. But then there was a very clear mental triage as to what I should be doing at any given time. Hmm.... 

    Luckily you have a very immediate goal of your masters thesis. 


  2. I should mention. 


    Weird gaming dreams. I notice that everyone smokes and it's annoying. 

    I get game cravings around 2pm. And around 8pm. 

    I had a dream I was playing...  Something and then got upset because I spoilt by detox. then I woke up. Weird. 

    I want to get back to my old blog. But I think nutting out the morning routine is my main focus for now. Maybe next week 


    I keep forgetting to do my headspace... 

  3. Day seventeen.  Dancing queen. 

    Work is full on at the moment. But things are moving along at a reasonable pace, so I think I've started to get on top of things. As opposed to losing time to gaming, and feeling like I was on the back door all the time. The pomodoros are helping too. Keeps me from getting to engrossed in emails and stuffing around. 


    The morning routine challenge hasn't really worked out. I just don't have that jump out of bed oompf. I want to cultivate that habit though. A good start really gets things moving. I don't know. I've never really had much of a  the morning routine thing ever.

    I might go to Bath on the weekend. Should get out a bit more. 


    This weeks magic pomodoro count 25 / 56. 

  4. While it's important to have people around you, we have to really explore why you want them there. 


    There is a certain part of fullfillment of feeling connected because we just feel bored or upset or unhappy with our own self. Just being with ourselves. We feel we need to be validated. And we think that having someone else in our life will solve that but actually it's an internal thing that we need to address. 


    That's why people can have a loving family lots of friends and a lover and still feel alone. 

    I'm rambling sorry. But try to think. What do you really want from other people. Really really want. 





  5. Here's a thought i stole from archangel. (Cam put a vid jo about it so I watched Gary V keynote and some other stuff) 

    Behind every excuse is a fear. 



    CAM. What was your big take home from that conference?  you asked everyone else :P



  6. Hey man. You're doing really well. 


    Thanks for partnering up with me. 


    One thing I think is important isn't to cut stuff just out. I mean. If you fill your day with fulfilling stuff then maybe you just will lose interest in porn YouTube and so on right?  

    I also struggling with this but I'm not quite confident in tackling this myself. but that's how I plan to tackle in as time goes on. 


    We are in it for a long haul right? Like making changes that will really stick and that will take a long time to wean ourselves off  habits. 

    Always happy to talk if you're struggling. 



  7. day fourteen, drama queen

    Really happy to have Mario @WorkInProgress as a partner in this process now. cheers man. We both seem to be in a similar place in our lives. 


    Let's review. End of last week got sucked up into preparing this manuscript. Thanks to a prod from @Cam Adair. (How do i tag someone in a post). 


    Well that's over the line now and the boss will take my first draft and start working on it, which is a good result and frees me up from that to concentrate on other things now.  I have to make some minor changes today but hoooory.

    My phone died on Friday and I left my charger in the office , was off the grid on the weekend. But anyway. 

    Let's review How we are going ?

    Last weeks magic pomodoro count 17 / 56. 

    That would be better. But it's a good effort for the first week. It's actually hard to switch to Timeboxing so. .. Yeah sure. Let's keep going. 


    I will gradually add little Umm.... Daily quests?  Challenges?  Requirements?  

    Simple 10-30 minute things, but I feel will really boost my Dev. hopefully work these in as a pomodoro. I.e. 1pomo of fitness, 1pomo of phone (only). Etc. 


    Things to add to my list of requirements: 

    • Better morning routine: Having a strong morning routine is a good way To kick start the day. 
    • cutting down phone time: Stuffing around on my phone is a nasty habit. Need to be focused when I do it. 
    • readings:I used to be a voracious reader. I miss that. 
    • side projects I have a number of creative side projects in my mind to work on. Mostly work related. Blogging. "building a personal brand" essentially. Career development. It's more fun than it sounds. 
    • harmonica. I have a harmonica in a drawer. I want to mess around with music a little bit, this seems a good gateway drug. (guitar is too cliqued)
    • fitness: A little bit of movement to keep the blood pumping. 


    I will add these over the coming weeks. They represent things I actually want to do with the 10-20 hours I've hypothetically freed up from gaming. 


    Other than the pomodoro goal. I think this week will focus on the morning routine. 

    This weeks magic pomodoro count 0 / 56. 



  8. Day 39

    I'm doing okay. Slow and steady. I'm having some cravings come up here and there. Some intense just recently, but after watching Module 6 I think I have some direction again. I haven't been meditating everyday anymore, writing in a gratitude journal, or really working out everyday. I run 3 times a week but I don't do something everyday and I could. (yoga, Freeletics, running, etc.)

    I get my first 30 day video game free chip though and I'm looking forward to getting the 60 and 90 day versions. Then 1, 2, 3, 5, ... year chips too.

    are there actual chips or badges for theae milestones ? 

  9. day nine.  what a crime. 

    that election man. 


    Lost the morning going over reactions and results. 

    Trying to focus on this manuscript draft that's due tomorrow. fingers crossed I get the lead out and finish it off. 


  10. day eight. One fat lady. 

    Started to build some momentum with time boxing. Haven't really thought about smoking as much as I thought I would. But the gaming urges are super insidious. A quiet whisper in my ear every now again. Maybe twice a day. 

    I might have been gaming 15 - 20 hours a week. Usually I was preoccupied with work during the week or stuff to do during the weekends so I might have a week that I wouldn't play anything. But when I did have that down time it went into games or watching streams or stuffing around on the internet  or something like that. 

    You can do a lot in 20 hours you know. 

    And because I was functional it seemed like it was under control. 

    But the fact I have these mental prompts about it, as if I miss it, tells me that dependency runs deep. 


    Dead lines are looming. Better get the lead out the next few days. 

    magic pomodoro count 7 / 56. 

  11. are you into programming? sounds like you are. my friend was trying to convince me to start learning it. 

    i've never tried headspace. but i used to meditate daily. i should get back into that again. trello sounds interesting too.

    good luck in your endeavors!

    ye. I code as part of my job. 

  12. Hey thanks for the response guys. Yeah, I actually intended to quit that drug. I really wanted to go clean, and I will. Just that old habits die hard, and when I am severely swamped I usually go for this one. But, let's say that this past weekend is going to be the last time. 

    Thanks for reading guys, and thanks for your support. I believe we are all on the same wavelength and opinion on this one. 

    Thanks alex for the article. I am currently half-way in reading it. I actually bought this book a while back, but never finished it.

    noopept probably isnt the worst thing to put into yourself but .. . we all know its a quick fix for deeper issues. 

    I read the last couple of posts and I think you're expecting too much of yourself. Nowadays Id count my self as fairly sociable but it took months - years to work up to that.


  13. I am a fan of  coistentcy Goals. Something like do ehadspace every day next week. Seing this written down helps you to "remind" you to do it if you don't feel like it ;) 

    The other Goals depend on what you want to achieve. Exercise is always a good idea ( because it helps in all other areas). Creating a good sleeping schedule or a morning routine would be the other classical examples of these all-around-Boosters.

    Yeah. Morning Routinee.That might be somethingto build into next week :D



    I think headspace automatically asks you if you want to setup a daily alert for it. which is nice. any way, good point


  14. Dont stress the tutor comments, (unless you know deep down theyre right (?) ) 

    It's really something only you can assess. Although it might be interesting to ask Why *they* think that. They might have some easy pointers. If they're just being a jerk then whatever man. haters ganna hate.

  15. Day 51: My mood was way better today - the result of me picking myself up and telling myself not to be such a little bitch.

    There's really nothing to gain by comparing yourself to published authors, or constantly looking down on your own work. As you may know I'm a big advocate for exploring different feelings other than happiness, but there's really no value in telling yourself you're worthless and that your writing sucks. 

    Following this day I won't give in to such thinking. I will

    1. Picture myself becoming published, as if that's the only option. As if I cannot fail. 
    2. Write because I love to, and not because I have to. I'm not in it for the money, I'm in it because there's nothing I enjoy doing more.
    3. Separate my editing voice from my writing one. This is essential. First I write without a thought on how the words looks on paper, then, much later, I edit, I change, improve. If I attempt to do both at the same time my brain suffers a complete meltdown and I probably break down and cry - no bueno.

    Phew. I needed to tell myself that.

    That's it for today though. The martial arts training lasted for longer than usual, and so, I'll have to hurry to bed. 

    Also, there's this whole "Winter is coming"-feel in Sweden now; the temperature finally dropped below zero and stayed there the whole day. There's nothing quite as refreshing as that first cold breath in the morning :P 

    Peace, people.

    write drunk, edit sober. 


    (definitely not said by hemmingway)