NEW VIDEO: I Quit MMOs and THIS Happened
seekndestroy
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Posts posted by seekndestroy
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#8
I was watching some vids from this communitys videos. And yes, I had also this thoughts about that it's not we who wants the game its our brain. Because of the Dopamine kicks the game gives us.
He talked about Masturbation and porn. I'm also thinks about more things, For example, to sniff as many do in our country. Snuff. I'm talking about moist powder tobacco user. I had to google and translate the word 😂
When you stop taking that, after years, it's like you claiming to the doors. And you can Stand in a food queue at the store, all of a sudden you stand in front of The Tobaccy Raises your hand even, stretches for it, and you have to stop yourself. The brain attracts you in every possible and impossible way to take it again, though you never really like it. That's not good! But the brain has made you believe this.
of course it's the same with licker. The alcoholic hates it. It's ruining his life, economi, relationship with others, his family, you name it, man. His brain. His health. When I grow up, my grandmothers brother was an alcoholic. He had delirium even. He was out going with the crocodiles he said 😂 "Wait, I'll just tie the crocodiles here on the bridge edge. "
Anyway, I was looking into two videos from this community. And there come up suggestion of an psychologist that I wanted to see too. First about when life stop working and you "freez ” and what to do about it. Second vid was about what you can do for you mental health
stop being on the phone. Only take it up when you going to do a specific thing. Than lay it down again stop wasting your time on the phone.
second.stop buying crap .
I'm thinking again what my therapist said about the phone. It takes your energy. It don't give you energy.
this YouTube psychologist said something similar. We know this too, don't we. We can't be bored not even for a second. We want the phone to constantly Entertain us. When we lay done the phone, what happens? Well, I could freeze, sure. Just laying down, feeling depressed. Maybe I have little energy left in me, but I don't wants to do anything about the mess around me. That I had not controlled at all. Because I have been online somewhere, prior was online life, not THE REAL STUFF. Oh, man.
but I think you can't , when you stop being online, sit around forever. You do other things sone or later.
that Disk for example. But also other things. Yesterday I got two college blocks. New ink pens. I was up early this morning and wrote three pages. For it is the best I know how to deal with addiction
three pages. Every morning. The first you do when you wake up . (You can take a cop of coffee too)
and you never show this pages to anyone. You don't even go back and read it yourself. It's the writing that is important here. Not the reading.
you wright about what you want. And you can do it on a free way, because no one, not even yourself going to read it. (Of course you can read it, but don't get obsessed to it)
some days you can get a genial idea of some kind. It's ok. But mostly the morning pages is Incredibly tedious. And is there anything I learned about it is that you will not be able to nag yourself year in and year out, side up and side down, without doing anything about it in the end.
I recommend Julia Cameron's book Artist's Way if you are interested. It has helped me. And millions. Julia was married to renowned film director Martin Scorsese. Many directors, actors and artists, etc. have whispered a lot of wise advice in her ears and she helps people get in touch with is your creativity, she means cures everything. She was an alcoholic herself. 3 pages every morning. No one else can read. It is a free fenced you can write what you want about your life. Add a daily walk. A date with yourself once a week, again you just have to alone. You take yourself out on a date, do something you think is funny. These are the tools .
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#7
I have been busy, not much thinking about the game. I was to church yesterday. I gave back 3 books to the priest. But admitted haven't read so much. I told him , I have fighting me out of a addiction instead. Of mobile games. And he said he took away his private Facebook account.
I talked little about this but I don't think he fully understood how addicted I was to this game, but it doesn't matter. The most important for me is that I'm not there any more. He gave me a Bible text. Asked me to meditate over the words.
MIka 7:7-8
Rejoice not over me, O my enemy; when I fall, I shall rise; when I sit in darkness, the LORD will be a light to me.
I then was eating and talking with others. And then I went home and wanted to hear prayers again. On Spotify. Podd. What have you. I felt a sleep for a while .
Woke up, took a glas of water and went out, because my son had the concert. I we to the liberay in my little city.
Talked to my other son if he wanted to come, but he said he was to tired .
Another person came and talked to me when I was there. He asked me how it was with me, and I told him . He himself is in love . He talked about the addiction I just took me out of. He said life is not complicated. He said life is easy. Thinking back to what he said, I think I don't agree with him. If life was easy, I hadn't struggling with things in my life.
At all.
I wished him good luck with his love and plans. I thanked God, I'm not him. Because I don't want the life he is living, though he seamed to think that. I told him I'm good being my own. I like that. I'm growing being alone, I m that kind of person. I love freedom . Doing what the hell I want .
I saw my son, I was so proud of him . He was playing drums to a Thin Lizzy song, Whisky in Jar, and after that, he sang in the choir, tenor.
They was so good, we talked and followed back home, talking about the concert and so.
When I was about to sleep I thinking this day I have almost not thinking at all about the game. I don't even feel like talking about it in same way I did before.
🙂
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10 hours ago, Vee said:
I have two suggestions that might help you (apologies if you are already doing these):
First, make a list of hobbies that you are interested in, or that you have been interested in in the past. Ideally, ones where success can be measured (e.g. exercise), or that help you socialise (e.g. volunteering). Game Quitters itself has an interesting tool to give you ideas: https://gamequitters.com/hobby-tool/ Did you like drawing or writing or crafting when you were younger? Are there any classes (dance, pottery, art, cookery, whatever) you and your children could go to together? If money is tight, what about exercise with your family or friends - running, yoga, cycling? You can also track your exercise progress with an app like Strava, helping mimic the sense of progress you felt in the game.
Honestly, at this point it doesn't have to be respectable "productive" hobbies - even just watching TV or reading trashy books will at least help break your obsession, even if they aren't ideal. To make it a bit more engaging, you could write reviews of what you've read/watched on Goodreads or IMDB or some other site.
Maybe in your journal try each day to write a paragraph specifically on some other interest, or potential interest. Even if you aren't ready to try something, you could do some research and write about why it seems interesting and what is holding you back. You could even just pick a random historical event each day that you want to learn more about.
Second, stop engaging in anything relating to the game. Don't speak to your guild members through other channels (unless you now consider them a solid friend, and they agree to not speak about the game at all with you). Capybara in particular seems to be an unpleasant person. Don't watch videos or read articles about your game. Consider using a website-blocking app on your phone. When you find yourself talking about the game to your friends or family, gently redirect yourself. "I could be preparing for the challenge today with Ren, and...Well, I'm glad I've freed up some time in my life. Maybe I should look into playing the guitar - I think that could be really soothing and satisfying. Have you ever played any musical instrument?" etc.
Obviously, without knowing your full situation, some of these suggestions might not be useful to you, but they are things to think about at least!
Thank you so much for this!!
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#6
It feels like the relief and immediately happiness for leaving the game, changed to something else now. It's like my brain trying to come up with something smart. "You could go back even if you left the guild. You didn't Deleted the game account didn't you? " It's like I wanna say to myself 'go away satan! "I thought about what requirements it is to be in a guild. To be in a guild is about delivering stars. More or less. As many as you can. For me it was upwards 3000- 4000 stars My goal was to get up to, so many as I can, all players do that, and we Competing against each other. Before the max of challange stars was over 5000 stars, now they have changed it to over 6000 challange stars it is the max. It doesn't make itself, it takes all day and much of the night . Only thinking about it takes away all the joy. I don't want this, just like a alcoholic hates the licker.
Yesterday I was out eating. While I eat, my hand reaches my phone. I always was eating and playing at the same time. I trying to read something but my mind keeps coming back to the game.
Coming home again I felt in deep Sleep. All my mind was about the game. Again, I was dreaming about it. Woke up still deadly tired. My 17 years old son came back from school. Talking about a concert he will have this evening at school. I bought the tickets . It's 19 pm. He said to me: " Mom, I wish you can stop talking about the game"
And I realized it was all I talked about because it's all I have in my brain. The emptiness is hitting me like a bomb.
I'm thinking about this boring days they have now until the challenge starts again tomorrow. I'm thinking about all they preper for tomorrow's challange. Ren laying out the maps for the challenge. Other lay out vids how to do this Maps, because this maps coming back over and over. Some harder, some easier. They also have s starhero for this period. Some better, some terrible. Mercer, Sacha, Yumiko is the best. Also Zeke, Tyresse', and Connie lead. Princess also good. Worst are like the Gouverner, and many Moore..
I was watching reaction of the new spin off series the onces who lives with Rick and Michonne , The Walking Dead. Because this game have the rights from the show they can do a map from the series . They have done all The Walking Dead, all of Daryl in Paris and Negan and Maggie in New York, and of course now they doing Rick and Mischonne. My brain screaming to me YOU MISSING OUT. YOU MISSING THE REWARDS FROM THIS
I found a prayer on youtube. I prayed.
but , maybe, instead of missing out from the game, I can go now this evening to my son's concert . I can and I will. I don't miss the game. My brain trying to fool me. And it's not about own will when it comes to an addiction. Deeply inside of me I wants to be free. Not addicted.
woke up also this morning with constantly thinking of the game, the people in the LINE.. Now I think I will trying to listen to music and clean up in the kitchen. I was too tired yesterday.
I can't believe how tired I am. And depressed somehow. I wish I could plug out my brain from this game. Just be in the silence.
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#5
One week without playing. Today it's monday. They have now done war finished. They share their war scores in the announcement chat. This was my last war. We was just 3 players that last Sunday so it was unusual. The next day I stoped.
Now they waiting for the challange to start on Wednesday. War is for season and to morrow they might have another wardays until next Tuesday. But this don't keeps on forever. They take a break with war, no one knows for how long. But it can take some time until next war season starts.
This game are Quite boring on Mondays and Tuesdays if it is not war. You collect into things that make you stronger. The Distance. Last Stand. On Monday it's Negans tomato Monday so farming gives you dubble so much tomatoes.
You wait until the war season is over until you get the free weapons in the Guild war shop. I left the guild so I don't have anything to get in the shop.
Instead I have a life to take care of. What about that. 😅
I have headache. But I'm glad to not be in the game. It feels like maybe The poison gets a chance to leave me. And it hurts. But when everything is gone it will feel good, better, best. It can certainly take its time. And I'll give it the time it takes.
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5 hours ago, LevelUp450 said:
March 24, 2024
Day # 130
Going to use a different format that speaks to what I do every day.
In January I took on a challenge created by one of my favourite podcast hosts, Rob Dial. It was called the LevelUp30 challenge and within it we had to hit 6 challenging pillars every single day. I completed the challenge by hitting those pillars every day for the month of January and was challenging myself to continue hitting the pillars every single day for the next 6 months. What happened? I didn't follow through, and I consequently started falling back into old habits (not eating healthy, less exercise, no meditation, etc). I do some of the pillars but not all of them. Ultimately I want to make this a lifestyle for myself where its not about hitting pillars every day but shifting my mindset that this is the way I want to live. Here are the actions I will be taking every single day starting today:
1. Exercise - run, walk, hit the gym for at least 30 mins every day.
2. Diet - eating helathier (no fast food, no pop, limited sweets, no chips) All those things I tend to over indulge with. In addition my diet will include more protein, vegetables, etc. Drinking more water (min 3L / day), Intermittant fasting. Also no alcohol (never has been a problem for me)
3. Meditation - continue practice with 15 mins daily - no distractions, etc
4. Journaling - in addition to continue writing here, write a handwritten journal as well. At least 15 mins per day of journalling
5. Reading - reading from a non-fiction (self-help) book for at least 15 mins per day.
6. Something that scares me - Find something every day that scares me and just face fear and do it. For me this can be a cold shower or a cold plunge. Could also be about making a new video, or any part of that process.
I believe I can do more than this but above is my committment for the next 30 days and hopefully further. As I progress I will love to adapt this as I change and grow.
Here is my new format:
This will be for yesterday (March 23, 2024)
1. EXERCISE ✔️
45 mins run inside workplace
2. DIET ❌
Didn't hit this pillar Had Subway sandwich today, 2 bottles (1.5L) of pop, some excess sweets
Did drink 3 L of water, no alcohol
Fasted from 8pm
3. MEDITATION ✔️
15 mins accomplished early morning
4. JOURNALING ❌
On Game quitters - no
On paper - yes
5. READING ✔️
15 mins Awaken the Giant Within by Tony Robbins
6. SOMETHING THAT SCARES ME ❌
Not done
WHAT WENT WELL TODAY?
Had a meeting with another self development group where I was introduced to some beautiful people who will help me stay accountable to my goals in self-development. Its called Warrior Souls and its a facebook group I joined. Should be good. This is the reason for this daily challenges to continue.
WHAT COULD I DO DIFFERENTLY TOMORROW?
Fight the urge to buy fast food and sweets. This came about because I didn't make my lunch and felt lazy in the morning before work. I went out at lunch and bought the easy thing which was not healthy. I can make the ample amount of time to make my lunch the night before or I could have made a better choice - salad, fruits from grocery instead of fast food.
DAILY AFFIRMATION
I can do all things that are required of me today because through Christ I am strengthened, empowered and inspired to succeed.
Have a great day everyone and thanks for reading.
I wants to show you the prayer that helped me, the day (on this week's Monday) that helped me, I stoped to play.
”Dear Jesus, I want to live for you. Forgive me for how I continually run to my phone for fulfillment, rather than seeking it from you. Would you help me with your Spirit’s power to overcome this addiction? May I learn to say no, so that I can say yes to you.Amen”
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5 hours ago, JuMpZ said:
Day #82/90
Today was not as productive as yesterday. I did get some more figure drawings done to try and pick out the best for portfolio review, and I did work on my 3 tone render as well. Outside of thar, I lazed around the rest of the day. I kind of wish I spent my time lazing around working on some of my own work. If I'm going to procrastinate, I wanna do it productively.
What I'm thankful for:
The skills I've picked up. I really have grown a lot artistically. Got much more growing to do though!
Goals for Day #83:
Work out artist statement for portfolio.
Make more gestures for portfolio.
Keep fine tuning portfolio.
It sounds lovely this art you're doing. ❤️🙏
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#4
Work up early. I was watching yesterday a Opera about Melancholia, the movie I saw and have seen so many times. Fall asleep after it. The opera on TV was incredible. I don't usually watch opera, but I love this movie. It describes Depression so good. I can really recommend Lars von Trier's movie Melancholia. It is about a large planet that bern hid behind the sun and is now on its way to Earth.
Thinking about what I wrote, yesterday that I should go to church. Should I really? I asked myself. Yes, I answered myself. 😂 I get dressed and go out. Yes, the walk does me good! Met a work colleague across the bridge. She was so positive. Made me happy. In the church, the priest talked about something Jesus sat on the donkey. He talked about The donkey's perspective, a poem, which was humorous. The donkey thought, think! They put palm trees out for me! Finally they see me! The priest talked about the fact that we are all easier to start from ourselves. But we need to put our ego aside. It was good a good sermon. Drink coffee, talked to others, went home and on the way I bought food I should cook now. Yes, in a way I miss the game, but It is so much better feel good. Being out in my small town. Go out meet the people I am grateful to be alive. I'm glad I have a faith in God. That I have a life. Two sons. I love most of all. Thank God for helping me.
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Welcome Dreamer! I am also a mother of two. And I am exhausted. I am 51 years old. My oldest son is 20 and has moving to his own and my youngest is 17 years. My youngest is so happy now for me and my oldest Cheers to me. It is sad how much time I have spend on this game and games friend that cares about nothing than the game. But life is short and I wants to be there in it. I also escape, and I think we got that common with all players. And sometimes we need to escape. It just that this games is very addicted thing we escape to. It's like heroin or something lol. It's terrible . Because the game company does things to the game to keep us there because the only thing they want is our money. Good you found us here! I found this place this week. I ended to play this Monday.
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On 9/19/2023 at 1:31 PM, Vee said:
I keep my own journal on Obsidian, so this thread will be more for a sense of accountability/venting than anything else.
The Past
The first time I think I had an issue with gaming was when I was 13 (in 2002) and used to skip lunch to play games in the IT room, which continued for about two years. Throughout my 20s and early 30s, it has been a crutch. Even when working full time I would rack up 30hrs+ a week gaming, and when I've not been employed 60-80hrs is often standard. The longest I've gone without it is about three weeks, back around 2015. It's been so ingrained in my life that it's hard to really know how much it has affected my basic functioning.
I've experienced depression for a long time, which is hard to untangle from gaming. Has depression made me inclined towards gaming, or has gaming made me more depressed? Is my low functioning due to gaming, or due to depression? The obvious answer to both is that it's mixed, but I haven't really had (or can't remember) a "before" stage to truly pin things down. The first time I self-harmed was when I was 8, and I also had a weird amount of anxiety at that age (I don't broadly consider myself an anxious person). I'm not sure I'd say I became depressed until I was 15, but still had other (mild) mental issues between 8-15. I was moderately depressed throughout my 20s. I've never developed any habits/routines that are considered normal, like brushing my teeth. My lowest point was in 2021, but things have gotten better since then.
The Present
I am currently NEET by choice (I'm living off a solid amount of savings from my previous job) and in a really good position in life. I'm living with brilliant friends in a decent town and have good energy levels. While I am trying to get into the habit of feeding myself, my housemates often cook food, so it's not the disaster it once was. This year, for the first time in my adult life, I've begun exercising (I used to walk a bit, but nothing more than that), although because there was a heatwave recently I've fallen out of the routine. I've also done a few things this year which are outside of my comfort zone, such as going to a four-day dance festival.
I feel...Not depressed? Maybe? Because I have a lifetime of below-average functioning, I am still externally not great. I really struggle with forming any kind of routine, but internally I feel positive. To give an example that sounds utterly ridiculous: I didn't know what magpies looked like until this time last year. I've never been one for leaving the house much, but even when I did go outside, it was like viewing everything in the world as box-like placeholders. Birds might as well have just been moving boxes in the sky, they couldn't possibly hold my interest. I guess the usual way of framing things is like saying the world was black and white and now it was in colour, but that doesn't really portray how hard it was to register what was happening around me.
I uninstalled Steam earlier this month, didn't play for three days, then reinstalled it to play a narrative game. I uninstalled Steam again two days ago. I was falling into a pit of playing three different incremental games at once, despite telling myself that I was only going to play that one narrative game. Browser-based games are also an issue for me, but there aren't any that I am currently fixated on.
The Future
I'll be honest, I don't like the idea of setting any too strict rules on what I'm doing or not doing. It hasn't worked out well in other areas. My current rough idea is: I will avoid PC games for one month (until October 18), review how I feel, and hopefully go for a longer stretch from there. Broadly I want to avoid mobile or console games, but it's not something I'm too concerned by, as I've so rarely been truly engrossed in anything not on PC. Odd as it sounds, I don't think my brain's mental map has strong pathways for using my phone or holding a controller, even though I could literally play the same games on those platforms.
While I can fall into watching too many random YouTube videos, watching too much TV, or reading pointless articles, I don't want to be overly ambitious in my goals. I would like to avoid those things, but I am not going to be strict about them in the same way I hope to be with PC games. I intend to note when I have done these things - I want to heighten my awareness of how I am actually spending my time.
I don't want to fall into some productivity trap where I'm constantly striving for something in the distance, never content with what I have. While I would like to do some career course (I am vaguely thinking of doing the AAT for accountancy), or, even better, be self-employed, I need to work on exploring possibilities and simply learning how to enjoy things. So my goals fall into two categories. The below are roughly in order.
Foundational:
- Primary goal: Eat three meals a day (Breakfast is the only one I'm currently good at) and do at least a tiny bit of cooking
- Exercise at least three times a week (Running, else walking if I'm really not up for it), and try to at least do a few pushups on off days
- Sleep hygiene - ideally go to bed before midnight and wake before 9am. For me, this tends to be about having other things aligned in my life (e.g. not being engrossed in a game, or not going to bed hungry).
- Hygiene - brush my teeth at least once a day, shower at least twice a week or after exercise (whichever is more)
Complex (for want of a better word):
- Journal daily, or close to. Make weekly reflection notes in Obsidian, and generally just use Obsidian more. I love the program, but I don't utilise it to its full potential.
- Write - ideally daily. I also want to start submitting some of my old short stories to magazines, and engage more in my writing group (which I've largely ignored for months)
- Read - ideally daily
- Explore other potential hobbies - juggling, ukelele, hiking, volunteering, kickboxing...
Doing all of that is obviously very ambitious for someone who currently eats 2 meals a day at best and (now that I've fallen out of the routine of running) doesn't leave the house every week. As long as I've not played games and I've eaten three meals, I will consider it a good day. Everything else is a bonus. I've had some success just trying to do things for five minutes at a time - juggling for five minutes, or tidying up the kitchen while I'm waiting on the microwave - so I will persist in trying that more.
Today
Today I will look into website blocking, and use Obsidian to ponder over what goals are realistic for me in the short-term. I hope to go for a run and then cook myself rice. It would be nice to plan out the next section of my novel after that, but I might just watch TV and not pressure myself with "should"s.
Good job. Keeping you away from gaming and eating 3 times a day is a good day and everything else is a bonus as you say. Keep it up!
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Hi Kelly. I am 51 years old 🙂
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Creativity cure everything I belive! Keep up with your painting!
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Reading sounds Awesome! Also good you taking help from a therapist, I'm doing that too. She told me that I cant control my life, but in the game I have totally control. The game is an escape. Maybe we need to escape sometimes, and I hope we can find better things than the game to escape too. ❤️
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#3
The first thought when I woke up early this morning was ” it's guild war today!" Then I thought of this site, and how happy I'm to found this place, and that I need it more than I can understand.
Yesterday I was watching the YouTube video here, he was in Thailand. Happy. Talking about how to quit, and he did it by stop playing. He talked about how he used to play for 19 hours everyday . That he wanted to die, and how happy he is now.
And he talked also about all time he have to do things now.
I think I was dreaming about the game tonight. I was in the game.
A guy that helped me a lot from the game, skirmäel from Finland, a hardcore player that used to lay out tips from his youtube channel about the game, we follow each other on Duolingo, we both is learning France there. I said to you that it's not possible to chat there. Now I sow it's . But, then you say only things like good job! And such .
I'm thinking about the players you know. How it's going now, without me. If they talks about me at all. I was wondering if no chance that become co leader also not so long ago, I wanted that, yeah, he is the one drawing guild wars plans now. He told me, also from Sweden, that he was quitting this game for one year. Than it was fun playing again . But now I'm thinking I will not do as him. Capybara said "some comes back. Some is gone ". Well, I will be gone . No chance also told me that he played another game. He spend 30000K on that game . But after he quitted that game he have never missed it.
I'm thinking that it's has nothing to to with your will , or if you miss it or not. This is about addiction. You have to realize that. And I think it's like other addiction. You can't go back . Not for just playing little bit. It's like an alcoholic think he can take one glas. Just one? Everyone knows you can't do that.
The guy in the video said he hadn't played for ten years. There is no going back. That's what I belive in.
But I was also thinking about the phone in itself is an addiction. And I have not so much disare anymore being so much in the phone.
But in the phone games, I was thinking about one thing I was reading, you are never finished. There is no end of it. The game keeps going on forever.
So it feels so good finish things. Finish the dishes. Finish cleaning the room. Outside from the phone game there is a lot of things you can finish. And that feels good. So finish something. Go on and finishing things.
Today I'm awful tired. Headache sometimes. I was sleeping on this day. Thinking that maybe I'm more exhausted than I thought and that much is about this game. Maybe my brain is in Shock not constantly playing, and talking in the LINE chat.
Yesterday I was watching a movie on my TV, I really loved and already seen many times, Lars von Triers movie Melancholia. That, had never happened before. All my time was to the game. It's scary, how blind I was .
Capybara said that he always felt better when he went to gym or taking swim. But how good wouldn't he also feel, if he stopped playing? Because I think the game itself make us depressed.
Yes, I saw the news in Russia , IS shooting people , 150 is dead . Either by being shot, or by the smoke they choked. They set fire to the mall where the concert was. 6000 were at the concert. It is scary and sad and horrible.
I want to take a walk to church tomorrow. It will do me good.
I'm thinking about another thing Capybara said. That it's not an addiction this game. Of course he is in denial. He is a hardcore player . Another same as Capy said that when you're a hardcore player you finished the challange in just two hours. Yes, I said, but it takes time come where they're.
Now I'm wondering why they have to do it at all. They is maxed up their heroes, and they keep playing the game. Is goes faster, because they are fully upgraded, but why? Why can't they stop? Because it's about the ego? Claiming those lists.. ? Also it is because the game company knows how to keep the players. It's about the perfect balance of doing it hard, but not too hard so they give up. The company knows how to keep the players, and how to getting their money continue to them. They knows what they're doing . They manipulate the players . And that's not fair but more important it's not worth it! Being depressed and miss out your life that keeps happening outside from your phone. Look up from your phone. Discover your life you've been giving. Don't waste it anymore.
Questions like this , I don't think they wants to see them, or even .. aware of it at all. Playing is fun. Yes, I was thinking so too. Capybara said to me, why do you stop playing if you like it? He could also ask a alcoholic why he is drinking and wanna stop if he like it? Capy said that he wants players to stop because they're bored of the game and leaving happy.
I don't think anyone of them are happy. And they will never been as long they playing . No one that's leaving the game is happy.
I think everyone playing that game is depressed and addicted, just like me.
I was quitting this week this Monday. It was a process. I did it. And I wants to say to myself GOOD JOB! Way to go! Hurray! I needs to celibrate this someway. Sone a whole week without playing .
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Thank you!
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7 hours ago, Dark said:
DAY#36
Had the DREAM that i am back with my ex, failed test and some other horrible things so woke up even before alarm😁.
My grandma and my cousin came to me. Even tho i cleaned all rooms they found some stuff to clean and its good, but its means i have not seen some problems with my cleaning preferences.
Did 4/3 problems i feel good about it. More over i am now focused on preparing for test found cs32? i guess and some more courses.
What i am thankfull for:
- My grandma for coming and offering help
For my goals:
- Prepeare for exams(test)
- Make some test project.
Thats all for today)
I have also been dreaming I remember , but I can't remember about what. 😂 I used to write the first thing I did when I woke up, 3 pages in a collège block. That's is a really good tool I want to go back to.
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DAY # 2
Time I woke up: early
Time I went to sleep yesterday: 21:30 pm ca
Physical task: removed my players prenumerations on Youtube
Mental task: Still very much thinking about my game. That I had two account. How much time it took. Capy often wanted me to do things, screenshot of the players score, at challange, at war. to the announcement chat. There is was no chat, scores only .
but in the leader chat, or in private, Capy wanted also screenshot of players that's been inactive, their levels, and who to boot, if the guld was full and it often was . 20)20 players.
He found another women that became co leader, in the other guild I had . She was helping him recruiting new players. I was helping him remove the inactive players.
I was leader there at first, but stepped down to co leader. She reminds me about myself. We are as it seams in the same age, she's from Denmark, Im from Sweden. Capy was an Italian leaving with his family in Spain . He said he started to play when his dad died . He have a elderly mom in Italy left, she don't wants to move to Spain he said.
anyway, besides everything with the game, I was talking with Capybara almost everyday all these years. About the game. About life . In privat or in the chats. He said when I was a leader that i have to keep live in the chats . Talking everyday . If so just say good morning. Or news about the game . Talking with the players of all kind of things . The more they talk the more they play, he said. Again, why do we most to have to play so much??
not only took it time to do all Game stuff. We talked a lot too.
the reason I cried was when a member in my guild said I was spamming the chats . Thats when I knew I was done . He are wrong! capybara said he don't have to read! You can talk about what you want. He said. But I knew this player was right .
later, when i had left the guld, and Capy was disappointed I guess, he admitted he had hoped that i would calm down. It was when he said that I knew I had done the right thing.
Well. I was googling a lot before I decided to end. And it's scary to see how much manipulation it's in this games. They are building them so we got addicted . I think it's so with all apps. And they doing all they can so we will spend money . Also, they do it difficult, but not so difficult that we feel for quitting. They know the perfect balance of this .
Anyway, he even said that I could easily being replaced if I would disappear. But he could also say that without me nothing would work. He had no patient and wanted things fast. I was often online and I could deliver things to him fast.
I had two phones and two game accounts and I was about to building up also my alternative account. Jesus Christ I can't even understand what was I thinking ??!
another thing about the game is that my photo gallery is full of pictures at scores , heroes, weapons, armors, etc etc...and I need to take all this away, as a future goal. (Trying to ignore my brain that saying this Can be good tO have if I ever go back. BUT NO. I WILL NOT GO BACK. )
I am learning France on Duolingo. Have two game friends there. I can keep then there, because there is no chat in that app, I'm thinking .
Projects:
* Going to retreat on long Friday Easter in church. Looking Forward to that.
* Me and my friend going to a concert with my youngest son at school . Calling her about it Monday
* Missing my oldest son . We been talking about going to movie and eating thai on a resturang we like.
Miscellaneous accomplishments:
~ Seeing Dr sone.
~ Seeing my therapist sone
~ Talking with my union about a meeting we been waiting for. My union wants to do an Power collection for finding a solution about my work situation . I'm in a rehabilitering . I wants my job back.
~ I want to start reading more
~
Summary of Day #:
Another day without playing! Another day without capybara etc. They probably already forgot all about me.
What I am grateful for today:
~ beeing out.
~ meeting my friend, drinking coffee, talking
~ we was walking out in the sun
~ me will surprise my youngest son after school with his favorite food
my son's Support means a lot. It was actually my oldest son that first started to talk with me about my addiction. I didnt wanted to listen at him at first . My youngest son is happy for I think all of us that I quitted the game.
Over and out!
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5 hours ago, Troll Warlord said:
which game
No man's land, The Walking Dead
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6 hours ago, Dark said:
Hi, welcome and i hope ypu will be successfull in your journey. I ll come from time to time)
Thank you, and thanks for support! Im reading your journal too now. 🙏
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On 11/19/2020 at 6:04 PM, Pochatok said:
Hi! I am a 20yo(he/him) college student studying English, Art and Music. When I was introduced to my 1st video game- Tanki Online(haha yes very lame)- I was so overwhelmed with it I would play up to 6 hours per day. As of yesterday, I never play more than an hour a day. But, even that amount I find harmful- I could have cleaned up my room, taken a longer shower, do some exercise, talk to my friends... So, I decided to quit, once again.
Previously, I've quitted countless times. I would get incredibly mad at myself, delete all of my games and social media accounts only to crawl back into gaming within a week Each relapse would be slightly better than the last- the amount of time I spent playing decreased over the years- but addiction would still win over me. I stumbled upon this site just a few hours ago, but reading all the stories here is so inspirational! I really hope that this time there will be no relapse- I plan on playing games from now on only if that is a way to connect with people whom I can not see physically. Time to break the loop of relapsing yeeeeeee!
Here's my priority list for today(I'm keeping it general on purpose):
- Finish up the 1st three parts of my last Final
- Submit paperwork for my campus job
- Practice for the performance tomorrow
- Make a list of things to do for Winter Break
- Clean up my room
- Do other various paperwork for volunteering, other jobs, financial aid, and classes.
- Talk to my grandparents 🙂
- Draw on my own.
- Pick a new book to read.
Hehe I'm so excited to press the "post" button, I have so much faith in this! See you later, and thank you so much for the read!
Cheers,
Pochatok
A new book to read. That is what I wish to do also. It feels like I stopped reading books when Internet came. It's terrible. I loved reading books. When I was growing up. God, what I miss reading books. What did you read about? What is it about? Keep up the positive things you do!
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On 9/17/2022 at 12:11 AM, Yan said:
Hi, I haven't played for about a year now, but from time to time after binge eating a big meal I fall to watching gaming YouTube videos, I want to avoid this as this is a huge time waster and start with 90 days.
I guess this journal will also be somewhat tied with my eating habits, since I watch the videos after eating a big meal.
Good luck to me... And thanks to you who's reading it 🙂
Thanks for you post! Makes me full of hope.
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On 1/4/2024 at 6:16 AM, JuMpZ said:
Day #2/90:
For only being day 2 of my detox, it only makes sense that I haven't felt any strong urges to game yet. I did however finally spend 3 hours on my still-life mango painting today! It's nearly finished, but gouache paints are quite difficult to work with. Other than that, I spent time with my mother running errands, which was perfect for when I was starting to get bored and holed up at home. I'm hoping to remedy this issue in the future by starting an exercise regime. I have been so inert at home and during my art studies, that it has definitely taken a toll on my well-being as a whole. I intend to do walks every morning at minimum, and potentially start running again. I used to be a semi-serious runner when I was much younger, running up to 16 miles at a consistent 12 minute mile pace with no breaks. I am nowhere near that level of fitness, and I would even say I'm the most out of shape I have been in my life. At the very least, I wanna challenge myself to start running again after doing some walking for a while.
As for the more relevant note regarding my decision to quit games, the end of today showed a lot of mixed response regarding my decision from my peers and family. The most important thing to note is that my mother fully supports and understands my decision, and is willing to do everything she can to help me get through this difficult time in my life. I've had a good number of supportive peers, and ones who poured their heart out to let me know how proud they are of me for taking such a huge step. I've also had some responses from friends who told me to not fully quit, and that I should simply just moderate my hours, even having one response with slight undertones of shaming and slighting me. In any case, one thing nobody can take from me is that this is my decision, and it wasn't one I made overnight. Years of contemplation and denial have led up to the circumstances that are currently at play. We'll see how far I go!
What I'm thankful for:
- Having a roof over my head
- My highly supportive mother
- Having a tight-knit art community at my school that also support my struggle
Goals for Day #3:
- Spend some quality time with a friend outside of gaming.
- Finish my mango-still life and start a new painting!
Potentially continue my ref sheet for my Kirby fan character, Aperture.
Wow! That is so good tips! I feel actually depressed. But reading your journal makes me happy. Go out every day is a wonderful goal. I also used to run once. Not as long as you did. I was so happy for running 5 Kilometers, twice a week. I have a longing to come back to it again but it has felt so impossible. But I really want to. 🤔
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On 1/3/2024 at 7:36 AM, JuMpZ said:
Day #1:
Today marks the first day I write about my attempt to rid my life of video games. I spent today removing my steam, epic games, and battle net accounts, whether it was through deletion or handing it off to my sister, for good. I also cleaned up my YouTube of all gaming content and kept all the art content that I actively used during my semesters in my art program.The difficult thing about me committing to removing video games from my life is that my chosen future career path is so closely intertwined with the usage of computers, and may even potentially dip into the realm of video games. What I hope I'm able to do is delineate playing video games versus making art for any game related content down the line. Preventing myself from homogenizing the act of playing games vs making game-related artwork seems like the true challenge I'll be going through in the long run, but I definitely don't think it's impossible.
Ultimately, the goal right now is to not play a video game for 90 days, so I'll stick to worrying about that. If I can pull that off then I think I'm capable of more than I give myself credit for.
As for the overall structure of this journal, I'll have to decide what I want to add to my daily entries without overwhelming myself with too much, so this first entry will be a lot more informal than future intended entries. Thank you.
It's not easy to cleaning up things, but it's the only way. I also felt so. The day when I decided to leave my game, I was googling a lot ”how do I stop my phone game addicton” and I didn't found what I was looking for. But then, I did my own plan. It was brutal. It was about delete LINE. Leave the game. Things I thought was impossible. Because I have been playing so many years.
But I did it. And now when I read your journal here, I know I'll have to clean up my YouTube too! I follow a lot of players there, they lay up their video tips. Now I will unfollow them. Thank you .🙏
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#Day 1.
Woke up with headache. Spend all my day to write more at my first blog post about the game. But since I found this community I have abandon that blog, and decided to have my rapports here instead.
I wrote a long post here in my introduction about myself. Realize it was not much about me. Mostly about the game. Thinking that in my head I'm still in that game. I know this is not easy. I have only been out from the game for 3 days now, I think .
Haven't been out today. But I have eating. My brain trying s little bit telling me that what about go there again? Finding yourself a new guild. It's challange day today! My brain saying. You get lost of stars!!
I go to my Spotify. Listning at praise songs. Listen also little to Willie Nelson. Sinead O'Connor. And the man in black, forgive me, I forgot his name now. I need also this artists, and the songs about God. Take me to church. Sinead songs. I don't wanna die anymore she sings. Than I thinks about that she is dead, and it's sad. An angel flying to close to the ground Willie Nelson songs. And Jewel sings about Angels too. I think she did this with her mom.
Music helping me. I have put togheter song list. Listening over and over.
I don't miss my play friends I try to say to myself. Like an affirmation. They sure don't miss me. They are playing challange now. Yeah.
But I will never go back to this game again. It's over . I haven't deleted the account. I have been thinking about it. Telling myself it will be lost when I deleted the app. So let that happen.
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Seeks rapports from the battlefield
in Daily Journals
Posted
People here , I'd like to thank you for you support, and tell you that I will end my journal here. I prefer to write in my own diary. I wish you all good luck In your game free days and life! We got this. Thank you. M