[My Journal]

5 hours ago, Yan said:

GP stands for General Practitioner? And what kind of medication are you refering to?

That's right yeah and it's sertraline for my anxiety/OCD 😊

[My Journal]

40 minutes ago, Paul A. said:

Things are going well! I’m diving into the world of tech and learning front end web development, which is pretty exciting. Haven’t had much in the way of cravings either, overall doing pretty well!

That's great, well done 😊 It's something you can be really proud of too as you learn more about it and see results. Good luck with it 😊

[My Journal]

5 hours ago, Paul A. said:

Taking care of yourself is so important! Glad you’re putting your own well-being first

Thank you so much Paul. That means a lot. How are things going for you? 😊

[My Journal]

I've started taking  my medication again today on the advice of a GP. My motivation levels are super low right now and I've definitely had some cravings. I'm taking some time off work to help me  heal as that is a huge trigger for me at the moment.

Luckily I have no access to consoles and I'm going to try and push myself to get out of the house as much as I can.

[My Journal]

It's not been a great day today- I had a super bad day at work and my anxiety has taken a turn - I might need to take some time off and also consider going back on meds. I can't pretend there weren't points during the day where I didn't think about gaming and I hate that - I haven't gamed as I don't have my consoles, but I think I would've if I could. 

I also had more angry dreams again last night so these seem to be quite consistent - my moods have been up and down but the low points have felt quite low.

Will keep this updated.

[My Journal]

I'm on day 8 now.

My moods have been all OVER the place since my last journal.

I don't particularly feel like I'm missing games, but I've been going from super high and super motivated to super low and super unmotivated really quickly and also been having quite angry dreams still. I don't know if either of these are connected to quitting, but I never have angry dreams usually?

I've finished watching the Respawn Elite videos for the 1st time now and really want to thank Cam for making them. Being aware of what to expect from quitting and the tools he's given in those videos are really helping. I've found meditation to be really useful. 

On days off I've been giving my all to the writing course I started as well as cooking, walking, reading and sometimes knitting. I'm still finding the Pomodoro method to be really useful and would recommend it to anyone who hasn't tried it yet.

I'm at work today so hopefully be a good day cravings wise. 

[Paul’s Journal]

28 minutes ago, Paul A. said:

 

I’ll give it a try! Thanks for the recommend!

You're more than welcome 😊 It's been the only thing I've found so far that's helped in that area so I hope it helps you too 😊

[Paul’s Journal]

3 hours ago, Paul A. said:

Day 4 Game-Free

I gave into PMO last night. I had already gone on a walk earlier that night, and by the time the cravings rolled around, it was around midnight and I didn't have the energy or willpower to leave the house again. But, I do have another plan in place. Every time I feel a craving hit, I'll simply turn my phone off. Since my phone is the primary device I use to watch porn, I think having my phone off will create a mental hurdle between me and my habit. Not a terribly high hurdle, granted, but it would give me a moment to think before I engage in PMO. Plus, the minor inconvenience of turning my phone back on might keep me from giving in altogether. If need be, I may turn off my old laptop as well. But one thing's for sure, I'm definitely not using my brand new gaming laptop for something as nasty as porn. Never gonna happen.

I spent almost my entire work day messing around with code. Either I was in Visual Studio Code writing code, or I was learning C# from online resources. It probably wasn't the best move doing all this while at work, but I didn't care. I'm just so excited at the prospect of learning coding and game development. It arguably excites me more than gaming ever did. I haven't missed gaming at all these past few days, because I'm so caught up in this new world of coding/game dev. Cam was definitely spot on when he said to replace gaming with other activities, which is something I didn't really do the first time I quit. The importance of replacement activities that motivate and excite you cannot be understated. If you don't find something else to fill your time, you're bound to fall back into gaming again. But I just don't see it happening to me any time soon, what with how much fun I'm having with coding. I'm excited to keep learning and growing my skillset in the coming days.

Sounds like you're doing great 😊 I'd recommend and App for your phone called Detoxify. I use that and it's brilliant for any porn cravings - you can even get it to choose a random PIN for you, effectively locking you out of certain websites or apps permanently 

[My Journal]

I think today was the first time I had to battle a craving since quitting a week ago.

It's important to note I sold all my consoles already so can't act on cravings - I'd also unsubbed from all the gaming channels on YT, but a video still came up as recommended on the home page and gave me a real gaming itch.

I tackled it by speaking with my partner and also signing up to a basic creative writing course. I've always wanted to write and this feels like my chance. We tested out the pomodoro method today and I loved it. I went out walking twice, read my kindle and practiced some writing and all that definitely helped.

I've also been trying more self care as this slipped a LOT during my latest addictive period. I want to meditate for a bit later as well. 

Finding this really helpful so far.

[My Journal]

I haven't posted for a couple of days now- I don't have any big updates except that I've been making some good progress and still been working on taking on some new hobbies. I don't think I've really had cravings as much as I expected to, so I hope that can continue. I would say I feel a lot less anxious without gaming which I'm really pleased with.

[My Journal]

I was working in the office again today and it was another mostly good day today.

I've been finding joy from a lot of things I'd perhaps previously neglected. I was so happy to hear another new song from The 1975. That band has been such a tonic and such a mood booster for me in recent weeks. I love them.

I had a bit of a rough night's sleep last night and I'm not sure if this is connected to my quitting mission. I had a lot of really angry and angsty dreams which is very unlike me.

Overall though I'd say things are going well 😊

[My Journal]

Today I was working in the office so I didn't have much opportunity to think about gaming - work days I find are usually easier in the process as I'm too busy with something else. I would say my mood gas mostly been good today 🙂

[My Journal]

Today is my first full day since I decided to quit.

I talked in my intro post how my gaming got so bad that I was even doing it while I was meant to be working.

I want to go cold turkey on gaming so this morning I went and sold all my consoles. I am probably going to use the money so that me & my boyfriend can go away for a night or two when we're off together, as spending more time with him is one of my goals from quitting.

I also spent some time cooking, cleaning and buying groceries.

I really want to get back into cooking and as I make my way through the respawn course, I would also love to get into writing stories (I already read quite a bit)

Yesterday evening I had that adrenalin feeling of not being quite "there" - it's really hard to describe but other people may understand. I'm not sure if it was a craving but it would make sense if it was. Today I've had that feeling a bit but keeping busy helps a lot! 

[Hi!]

Hi everyone 😊

I'm Luke, I'm 29 and from the UK.

I have been gaming ever since the 90s when I was little and never really not been a gamer (except a brief period during my years at Uni where I couldn't afford it!)

I can go long periods without gaming,  but when I get started I become SO obsessed and can't stop. When not playing I will be thinking about when I next can or watching online videos about it. 

When I was little I was lucky in that my parents  limited my game time and so it was never really an issue. As I got into my teens I started realising I was gay and I think that was when the gaming started to really take hold. I found it hard to fit in during that time and I think gaming helped me feel safe.

I've suffered for a LONG time with OCD and a related condition called Skin Picking Disorder. My OCD makes me really prone to addiction. I've had therapy for this and have realised that during those periods where I'm gaming, it gets a lot worse. When I'm not gaming I'm restless and always wanting to use my hands for something. In the past I've also struggled with other addictions.

I've had a very supportive boyfriend for 6 years now, which I feel blessed for and he has tried to help me, but when I start gaming I find it hard to stop. I play late into the night, in any free time, even sometimes during work if working at home. It's mortifying and I feel like I'm lucky it hasn't destroyed my relationship. My mental health always spirals when I'm going through a gaming "phase" and I've really noticed this lately. 

I love reading, cooking and walking and hope to get more into all of these and maybe some new hobbies too.

This has become one of my main reasons to want to quit.

Thanks for reading 😊