computerfrom1999

(23/30) 👽 Busy gettin my laptop ready for the big trip!

(22/30) 😦anxious got a flight in 2 days

(21/30) 😙Chill my new phone is here it will keep me busy for a couple of days

(20/30) 😶stressed got a haircut. didnt like it. bleh

(19/30) 😊Feeling better After writing that out last night, I ended up exercising and it was actually a good experience.. I felt much better afterwards Maybe exercise really can be a way to cope? I mean I always know people tell you to exercise more, but I'm really seeing its merit for the first time. you guys are awesome. we got this, lets go!

(18/30) 😖 headache negative thoughts are back.. i have such a headache. My motivation is really low too. I did some work today and made very little progress. It felt it was so pointless and made me reflect on all the years I have little made progress (in a bad way sadly) Now I'm thinkin like, if there's even a point to me quitting game at all. Maybe it doesn't even matter. Really want to game and forget my troubles at least for a little bit

(17/30) 😪 still sleepy I'm not as sad anymore but boy am I super sleepy.. I feel like I sleep for half the day

(16/30) 🥵 melting Hey Paul, thanks again for dropping by. I've gave that a try and I think it went ok. I just kinda sat there and took it. You're absolutely right btw, it was my #1 coping strategy. Thankfully I think I'm gonna be getting out of it soon.. or at least I hope. Today I was heavily distracted buying a phone.

(15/30) 😞 in pain Idk if it's because my brain wants video games or what but my god I am just.. so negative and depressed right now I feel a constant headache and feel life is so meaningless. It's hard for me to even sit up.. I just want to sleep I do want to play games, but only so I can just be numb and turn my brain off from this bad feeling I have What do you guys think? Is this withdrawal? or am I just having a depressive episode? In the past, this was always when I called it "quits" and played games nonstop for a couple of days until I was feeling better. I'm not sure what to do. This sucks so much

(14/30) 😴 Sad slept all day cus I didn't know what to do or didn't want to do anything I've tried one once... but I didn't really have a good experience. They did prescribe me prozac which I still take. It does lessen the mood swings, because they're a lot worse without em. Thank you for sharing btw

(13/30) 😢 Depressed I don't know what it is... but I'm just so unmotivated and sad. No reason whatsoever. I just feel tired of everything (wanting to better myself, becoming sad then happy again happy then sad again) I feel anxious like all things are coming to an end at a fast pace. It's hard to describe. I feel like a husk. I feel empty on the inside. All that which drove me to do anything just vanished and all I can do is sit and watch it happen. The day started just fine, I went for a long walk after lunch even. But everything just started to piss me off and I felt myself wanting to be alone more and more. I even had a headache afterwards and just laid down in bed. Everything feels like it takes extra effort to do. To be clear, this has happened countless times. It cycles itself out every couple weeks or so. In the past, I've passed times like this by turning my brain off with video games. I won't be doing that.. I don't even really have much desire to play.. But I would still play it all day if I could right now just so I can stop feeling this strange feeling. I don't know if I'll be doing anything today (it's 9pm atm and I took a nap for 2-3 hours). I'm not sure what to do

(12/30) 🙃 Lazy Watched a ton of stuff with friends while drawing (namely EVO). All in all, it was an OK day. I think it's alright for now. I'm not too worried just yet because I am much more productive even without the gaming. Maybe that will be the next step once I feel I'm ready. I HAVE done full media fasting before, but ultimately caused me to relapse really bad. I live alone too, so I don't think it's very good for my psyche.

(11/30) 😕 Recovering energy Another chill day. I really feel like there's not enough time in the day and like I'm not doing much (evn though I'm doing so much more than I was when I was gaming) That feeling of "wow im doing the right thing" is kinda dwindling.. I kinda wish I was more motivated Didn't have much of an urge to game today tho so that's good

(10/30) 😔 Feeling negative I didn't game.. but everything felt kinda pointless. felt really unmotivated like I was directionless. Feeling indifferent would be the way to put it. Idk where my life is going

(9/30) 😶Unknown The program learning session was cool. The thought of wanting to game intrudes my brain every hour or so. Definitely another slow day, but not terribly unproductive. Really need to sleep earlier today. goodnight!