[Helen's diary.]

Your making huge steps and I'm glad your pushing through. In a way posting on here is allowing yourself to vulnerable. Everyone here wants to help with your journey as they take theirs so its good. It may even help outside of the forums(That's what I'm hoping anyway) xD
Enjoy your bike ride. Don't get discouraged if you find it harder than it used to be. It's only natural when you're out of practice. Give yourself a chance and you'll be a pro in no time 🙂 

[Mks' Journal]

6 hours ago, mks said:

I will start with goals that are within my reach. 

To make progress I want to ask myself "is this goal within my reach". As I tend to
reach for the unreachable I will flip it around and only do goals and tasks that are
within my reach - at least for now.

As this is a problem of depression I think it's a good approach. Got it out
of the book Elastic Habits. Will read it further as his situation was the same
as mine - just in his case he was intentionally falling back into a depressed state
to prove his system to get out of it.

My brother told me a long time ago that sometimes to achieve my goals I need to break them down into smaller things to achieve them. Try to view the steps you take towards them as the milestones they are and take pride in it. You'll get there if you keep going!

I thinks its really good that you've got a case study to read about someone going through similar issues. It helps find your path through if you get mentally stuck on something. Keep it up 🙂

[Will's Daily Journal]

Day 7

• I went running in the rain which honestly wasn't bad. I wasn't sure I would when I saw it, it kinda put me off but when I got out there I didn't even notice it really.
• Remembered to bring my camera for photography. Might start posting these as I'm not really sure what to do with them xD
• Continued to research into dieting, thanks to jakeyb540 and BooksandTrees for recommending myfitness pal. It has a few recipes I'm gonna get on tomorrow to bring me into a caloric deficit and lose some excess weight before I build muscles back up 🙂
• A mix of the meditation, gratitude journal and the daily journal are really affecting my outlook on things. I've done all of these regularly and it genuinely does make a difference. 
• Made an account on Yousician as I'm not really sure what songs to start with trying to learn on Electric, so I'm narrowing down my library with what they have available. Beyond that, I've been practicing beginner chords just to keep my hands going with it.

How I feel today

So its been a full week and for the most part its been pretty good. My days are full(for the most part), I exercise everyday, meditation and other things have calmed me down quite a bit which has made me quite alot happier. Still finding it hard to find people to become friends with, with the lockdown but its beginning to ease and I've had a few good social interactions this week despite it. Still want to hear the bands are touring again though, then I'll put my social ambitions to the test xD
 

Song of the day(New thing I'm gonna do)
Strike Back - Jonathan Young Fair Tail English Cover

Cya tomorrow 😜 

[Will's Daily Journal]

Thanks both of you for recommending myfitnesspal. I had never heard of it but I've given it a look and I think i'll give it a try 🙂

11 hours ago, jakeyb540 said:

I also had this feeling today. An inner voice that tells me that I'll get into more trouble going outdoors, etc. than I would playing games. I find this thought quite overwhelming, almost like I want to set myself up for failure to fortify that belief. What understanding did you find that helped you re-align ?

I think for me it was recognizing where the feeling is coming from. Its coming from a part of me that used games as comfort to smother out change in my life which I was afraid of. This is the main part of me I want to change. So when I was under the influence of these thoughts I viewed it as almost a distant or even separate from me because that's not who I want to be anymore. It made it very easy to just push passed by isolating it and just knowing where it was coming from. I'm no expert on mind matters, so I'm sorry if this doesn't quite make sense xD

I guess a decent analogy would be if a close friend who you've known and trusted was telling you to do something that you didn't want to do. It's difficult to look passed them being your friend and your natural instinct to trust, but if you do, you realize that you don't want to, so you just say no and walk your own way.  Even when I was not in a great mindset, its recognizing that this voice/thought/feeling didn't represent what I actually wanted, it represented what was comfortable. Then I guess you've just gotta be stubborn enough to push passed it.

[Will's Daily Journal]

Day 6

• I've been not doing my photography stuff for the past couple days due to exercise and I forgot the camera. Brought it today despite the not great weather. Gonna try to keep it in my back pocket so I don't forget.
• Began looking at different diet plans to help achieve what I want from my exercise.
• My new amp arrived today so I spent two hours practicing and fidgeting with the settings. Beginning to understand how to pull off certain effects.
• Spent my 6 hours studying today and found some really cool concepts I've not even considered.

How I'm feeling today?

So I had my first "Why are you doing this" moment. It wasn't great. I just got generally down and then it hit me which made me realize how easy it is trigger that relapse if I'm not careful. I didn't relapse or even feel really in danger of it, I just kinda took that understanding that it only takes that one moment for the mind to realign which is kinda scary. Beyond that, it was a full and good day.

Come on day 7, a full week!

[Hello from a programmer interested in philosophy]

Hey, welcome to forum. Good luck 🙂

[reza's journal]

You kept a positive attitude that's going to help you keep to your goals in the future. Keep it up 🙂

[Helen's diary.]

I miss my games aswell but I feel the reward we get at the end of this is worth it. Hang in there, we definitely deserve praise by the end of this, keep it up 🙂 

[Will's Daily Journal]

22 hours ago, ace_dee said:

One thing I learned is that the goal of exercise isn't to push yourself as hard as you can, but to push yourself as hard as you can WHILE still fully recovering for your next exercise session, even if that means letting up when you had more gas in the tank on any particular day

Its a transition from short term thinking to long term thinking that goes well with the decision to moderate your gaming

I agree, my exercise routine is one day exercise upper body and core, the next is back and lower body. While one day I run and the next I walk long distance. But I do definitely need to control it and not blow all the steam away in a week. I'm now following a pace but the bright side to pushing it is I found my limits without injury(luckily) so I've got a good idea now when to stop. Silver linings xD

21 hours ago, Helen said:

You are inspiring me. 👍😊

Thanks. But I'm just pretty stubborn xD

Day 5

• So after the last few days I've been really pushing exercise. Today I've read a fitness guide to show how small steps lead to large results (Like what ace was saying above 🙂 ) so I'm heading towards a consistent steady increase than risking injury to muscles developing.
• Studied for 4 of the 6 hours I was supposed to which isn't what I intended but family matters got in the way. Still, making progress to this schedule.
• My new Amp arrived 3 days early which was amazing so I've had alot of time working on this today. I'm by no point good but its a win 🙂 

How I'm feeling today?

The exercise is easier so I'm happy about that. Definitely noticing but I'm not looking forward to the 3 week struggle where your body slows up. I spent quite abit of time dealing with family stuff, it wasn't bad, just timely. But I stuck to the schedule aside from that which is good. Also spent alot of time with the new amp and it sounds so much better than my old one which helps.

See you day 6  🙂

[Will's Daily Journal]

Day 4

• Stepped up my exercise again. Think I need to cap it at something like this level. Feel I'll do more damage than good if I keep pushing. No point in exercising a day to have to rest an injury for the next 4 or 5.
• Began a new course which will give me a certification in a field I find genuinely interesting. Looking to study 6 hours a day on it over the next few weeks.
• A couple random social encounters out exercising. Looks like there are other people out there looking to self improve in this area. If I remember, I'll see if there are any groups going running in my area after lockdown eases abit more.

How I was feeling today:

Easier to wake up. Contacted by a couple gaming friends who wished me luck and said they'd be around if I was at my PC and wanted to talk which was nice. Saw them setting up a raid group which was painful as I used to lead our raids. I'm abit slow to move on from one thing to the next on the schedule but its early days yet. Wondering what it'll be like in a month?

Thats all for now

[Any inspirational music recommendations?]

16 hours ago, BooksandTrees said:

What's the point of the music? Is it something you only want to listen to once or are you constantly trying to listen to motivational music? Is it something you listen to while you're working or just need a quick burst?

I suppose what I use motivational music for is when I'm exercising or dealing with a problem where I hit a wall, I use it for the extra push to get me past it. I feel alot of things I push myself to do and surpass, I would not have been able to maintain the mental determination of  "I will do this" or even "I can do this" without music.
Thanks for the recommendations, I've set up a mini youtube playlist to listen to them all 🙂

[Any inspirational music recommendations?]

I listen to ALOT of music. It helps me push through most days. I'm not running out but I'm happy for suggestions and for people to drop stuff here for others to listen to. I'll start(I won't use links as I know some people don't like clicking on links, you can just search them up 🙂 )

 This music varies in Genre from Metal, Alternative Rock to Orchestral or Classical Instrumental and Anime theme songs. Post anything, I'll try to check all of them as I listen to just about anything. (I've deliberately avoided game soundtracks)

Back For More - Five Finger Death Punch
Get Lost, Find Yourself - Chunk! No Captain Chunk!
Vice Grip - Parkway Drive
Number One - Manowar
Chaos - I Prevail
Bow Down - I Prevail
Crossing Field - AmaLee
Odds Are - Barenaked Ladies
Best Day of my Life - American Authors
Crimson Bow & Arrow - Jonathan Young
Don't Stop Believing - Journey
Why Worry - Set It Off
Undefeated - Skillet
In Too Deep - Sum41
Now or Never - Madina Lake
Master of the Tides - Lindsey Stirling
Back To Me - Of Mice And Men
How To Survive - Of Mice And Men (This one is very aggressive so only listen if your into that sort of thing)
You Say Run - My Hero Academia 2016
Day of Fate ~Spirit vs Spirit~ - Team Four Star

Anything by Ludovico Einaudi
I've got alot more but I think this post should end at some point. Lemme know what you've got 😉

[reza's journal]

You've made progress so keep it up, your sleeping will get there if you keep putting your mind to it 🙂

[Helen's diary.]

You've got this!

[Will's Daily Journal]

Day 3

• I walked further today pushing through fatigue. Got a few pictures and one I think would have been great had the sun been out. I'll have to go again another day.
• First day of sticking to this new schedule in full. Its abit tiring but I guess it works as whenever I feel bored or tired of said activity, I push on for another 15 or so mins and if I still feel it, I swap to the backup.
• I plugged my Electric into a bass amp while my new amp will arrive later in the week and got some basic chords going.
• I've begun planning my painting for armies on parade, alot of research which I'll be putting into practice soon.

How I was feeling today:

I woke up tired as its a new sleep schedule, my body isn't quite used to waking up this early but once I got out and moving I felt much better. I did have to nap for a quick 30 mins around 6PM but then I woke up energized and ready to continue.

Day 4, here I come!

[Helen's diary.]

I've got a reminder to do my journal entries about an hour before I sleep. You'll get it, its just repetition, congrats on day 7 🙂

[reza's journal]

I'm not an expert on no gaming but Insomnia I can help with. It all comes down to pushing yourself through it to a reasonable time to sleep. Its alot easier to not fall asleep (and to not game I imagine) if your outside. The fresh air always helped me keep awake. After a while of pushing yourself adrenaline will kick in and help you stay awake till 8:30 PM. That's the earliest I would aim for. Its just about pushing yourself that extra mile. Being tired erodes your Willpower but you only need to do it once to kick you body back into rhythm. Your body wants you to wake with the sun and sleep with it setting so its actually easier to get back into rhythm biologically than not. Keep going, I have faith 🙂

[Hey all]

Thank you, I hope so 😆

[Starting fresh again]

4 hours ago, WhatAboutToday? said:

Another thing that I'm questioning about my first detox is that I didn't find a hobby that really engaged me. I don't think I really worked that hard to make it work. Maybe the easy rewards that games provide bugged my brain. I really like music and singing, but I just can't get in a state where I'm as hooked to music as I am to games or a good TV Series.

It takes time to really get into a hobby so keep trying. You could also look to more hobbies as options, I certainly wrote a few down when I read through Respawn but it definitely bugged your brain like all of ours. It takes time but we do reset to normal levels of dopamine, just keep trying your best 🙂 

[Will's Daily Journal]

Thanks Reza, WhatAboutToday? and Helen. I appreciate the support 🙂

17 hours ago, WhatAboutToday? said:

Great first step! Quick question: In addition to feeling terrified, don't you feel a "relief" doing this? I sold everything game related I had and, although I had a strange feeling while doing that, it was a also liberating experience. Just wondering haha

Yesterday while doing it, It was weird but I wanted to it. Today after the realization struck me it felt really good. It's like that nagging voice in the back of my head telling me to quit video games for years is gone. Great feeling of freedom in that I think so I guess relief is in there😜

Day 2

Things I did:

• I went for a long walk and started taking pictures. Not quite photography quality but it'll get there.
• Finished the Respawn Book and exercises
• Meditated and really sunk into it. It was really peaceful.
• Prepared a schedule for me sink into with the new exercises.
• Outlined my goals for after Respawn (see below)
• A good amount of studying again.
• I approached my best friend telling him how much of bro he is to me after doing the 10 things I was grateful for for the first time, he was at the top. I don't really share emotions much (currently) so this is a big step 😆

How I was feeling today:

Generally inspired from yesterday and taking my first big step. Looking forward to making it through this and living that life I'm told is on the other side 😉

Goals:

I want to play a metal song on Guitar by 01/01/2021. I'm starting from scratch but I dabbled in Bass Guitar so I think 6 months should be okay to get there xD

I want to run an Iron Man in 2021(This depends on if the season is open by then but I'll work on fitness till I run one and hopefully for a long time after).

I want to enter next years Armies on Parade with a fully painted army

I want to go to 10 gigs with new friends by the end of next year (As all venues are currently shut and I will not count download festival but I'll definitely be there 😉 )

I want to start dating again (or atleast try to) by the end of the year. I stopped a year ago after I left a long term relationship and it took a while to process, especially with me running to gaming whenever I thought about it.

Back again tomorrow 🙂

[Starting fresh again]

You've got alot of goals which is admirable and thanks for telling about the app "AppBlock", I have to say Youtube is probably my next biggest problem.
Keep it up 🙂

[Will's Daily Journal]

Day #1

Things I did:

• So I deleted all my games. Pretty terrifying when you look at all the hours you've racked on on steam. Still. They're all uninstalled and steam is gone too. I had to pass on guild leader to someone and I do feel kinda bad about that, but he simply said "Real life comes first". That's a lesson I could have learned sooner 😛
• Planned with my sister about what to do to surprise my parents for the 30th anniversary coming up. Also got my mother a birthday card as that's also coming up.
• Thinking about taking up photography. Just take a few pictures every day, walk somewhere different every day. I'll see where I end up tomorrow.
• Signed up to this after considering it for a few days.
• Got a healthy amount of studying done today. Even after uni the fun doesn't stop... (Especially with a pandemic having fun with all your job prospects 😜 )
• Gonna meditate after this. Its something I used to do and I feel its important to help identify the 'new' me.

How I was feeling today:

I've not been playing games for a few days(I watched podcasts but they've stopped now too) and its a really strange experience. Today was pretty hard. I woke up immediately with a game idea and wanted to jump on and try it but brought myself back in without too much trouble luckily. But the feeling was a constant nag in the back of my mind.

Not sure on anything else to add?

Right... Cya tomorrow

[Hey all]

Hey all,

Abit about me. I'm Will, 24 from England. I've been gaming since I was 6 and it wasn't always a problem. When I was young it served its purpose as I was a sheltered boy in an isolated village and didn't really have any friends because there was no one else around who was even close to my age. But when I got to my second year of college it became bad and clouded my mind and warped my priorities. I pushed through it and didn't acknowledge it for a few years. When I hit my second year of university I don't know what changed, but it got worse. My mind was constantly clouded and I couldn't think about things that weren't computer gaming. I went from Student of the year to barely scraping a pass the next year. All my other hobbies took a backseat. My friends and family all became distant and I didn't really care. But inside my head I was screaming, "Just do anything but this" and I would just follow it with "Tomorrow" or "Wait for the weekend", "Just one more match". I lacked the willpower(haha pun) to do anything about it.

Well. Moving on from that a couple years and my life has been pretty much in limbo and I hate it. So gaming has to go. Being 24 and gaming for over 12 hours a day I just can't justify, its a waste of life. I found this by looking for hobbies to replace gaming and watched a few of Cam's vids over the last week and it just made sense to respawn. Time to start living my life, get that job, buy a house, go on holiday, meet people and start looking up at the world, not down on the ground. I'm not really scared of this new chapter but looking forward to it.

Onwards!