Laurie

Day 6 Hey everyone! Missed yesterday, felt really tired for some reason. Well actually I've not been sleeping enough lately, I need at least 8h to function properly. I'll try to find methods to get a good night sleep from now on. Spent the day practicing drawing the human figure, it's just so damn hard really. Just finished my jumping rope workout and it's frustrating because my biceps hurt so much that I can't finish a round. Maybe not drinking enough water. Anyway I'll get to sleep kinda feeling frustrated with my overwhole performance today. Main goal tomorrow is to clean my room. See you! Laurie

@TheNewMe2.0That's right that's me! Thanks for remembering, also of course I remember you. I'm glad you're still progressing yourself ! I wish you all the best. Day 4 Had a good day! It's kinda late right now I'll be quick. Again made progress on that Java course, 5 videos done and exercices attached to them. Managed to solve all problems by myself, starting to get a hang on Java. Workout, again jumping rope and push ups. Progressed on that gesture drawng course, re-watched yesterday's course video and did 2 practice video of 20min each. Drawing humans is hella hard. Also made 1 quick fun drawing. Anyway heading to bed! Thanks and take good care of yourselves. See you tomorrow, Laurie

Day 3 Good day everyone! So back to work uh, it went well! Managed to beat my anxiety and get everything done. I'm starting to feel confident again, as it should be. Made progress on that Java course! 5 course videos done even though I encountered some difficulties making the programs work. Also did 1 practice video and watched 1 course video of that gesture drawing course. Did my jumping rope workout and daily stretching routine. Now I'm going to brush my teeth, meditate for 3 minutes and read an amazing manga until I fall asleep. See you all soon and take good care of yourselves! PS: I think I'm going to redo the last week of my beginner push up workout program before moving to intermediate level.

First off thank you all for your support, it's very helpful. I don't have much time for this entry as I just came back to my working place and need to go to sleep. @BooksandTrees What you say is actually quite spot on as I was projecting myself on these skins, as if I wanted to be a one of these character. I mean being a ninja rapper popstar riding a bike sounds cool to me. I'm weird like that. LOL For my second entry I'll share my short term goals: - Finish gesture drawing course on Skillshare by november 14th - Finish the "Get Lean" Crossrope challenge by december 1st -Start intermediate push up workout program by december 1st - Finish a mental health course about controling my "monkey mind" by january 1st - Finish Stefen Maurer's Java course by november 20th - Finish reading and taking notes from the book "Anatomy of story" by John Trudy by november 20th Feeling quite anxious to get back to work but it will pass. Take good care of yourself everybody. See you tomorrow

Hey everyone, So yeah it happened, I relapsed and played League Of Legends. I was 7 months and 14 days gaming free, can you believe it ? It's 03:21am right now. Been a while since I staid up this late. I mean I can't really explain it myself, honestly. I just got so hooked up with these new KPOP skins, makes no sense, it made me want to play very much. Also doesn't help that I kept checking up content about this game all the time even at work. I feel awful but at the same time I'll be gentle with myself and recognize that even though I made a mistake, I can get back up. I managed to do so much during these 7 months, it won't go to waste, that I promise to myself. So for my first journal entry: I'm starting Respawn Elite again. I'll spend the rest of the night completing it, not have much of a choice. I'm starting work again tomorrow even though it's lockdown here in my country. I'll update daily until I'm fully off gaming again. See you soon, Laurie

@Erik2.0 @Marek Thank you so much both of you I really appreciate your support. 🙂 I'll keep it as a hobby for now, but a very serious one ahah Day 13: I really struggle to write on my journal daily. The last 3 days I've been completely off track my sleeping schedule so it doesn't help. Still I didn't play and I didn't have any cravings but I'm feeling kind of alone and spend most of my time drawing. I think I should make an effort to talk to people on Discord. I'm also sticking to my workout and starting to eat better. That's all for now, thanks for reading and see you tomorrow! Take care, Laurie

Hey Erik, You can find manga tutorials on skillshare here(you'll need to subscribe to get access to all the content though : https://www.skillshare.com/search?query=Manga&searchMethod=autocomplete ! 🙂 You can also check this youtube channel : https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCvMBMKniUFj89VwhH-MOG8w The guy running it is a pusblished manga author I'm glad everything is going well for you, your post put a smile on my face, thanks for your positivity and doing your best everyday. I wish you best, Laurie

@Marek I am the same regarding work! @Icandothis Thank you so much for your support! Day 10: Sorry for not posting the last 2 days, I promise I haven't played a single game and I spent nights drawing and editing videos but also having some existential crisis. Basically stopping video games put me in a place where I'm really considering my future as an artist and a military, how can I deal with both at the same time? I've never drawn this much since I quit gaming and the more I draw the more I'm getting in touch with that child I was who had this dream of drawing as a career. I'm looking up a lot of content regarding professional concept artists and comic book artists. I'm wondering why I'm not pursuing it right now. All my life people told me it's because the art field is hard and I'd lack money if I didn't have a job to live. So right now I'm trying to make a long term plan that includes improving at art while growing an online community to promote my work. At the same time I'm thinking to keep my job as a military until my employment contract is over, which will be in 6 years from now. My head is boiling with thoughts and the coronavirus doesn't make it any easier, when you witness how the world is changing and what's happening you're kind of forced to think about your life a lot. I can't help it and video games aren't here anymore for me to escape. I believe the truth is that I've always wanted a carrier in art but I'm too afraid to lack money and I know very well how a lack of money can be stressful. So yeah sorry if all this doesn't make any sense I'm just thinking a lot about my future right now. In the meantime I modified my workout a bit in order to seperate muscle groups, rest times should be much better now. Anyway thanks for reading and take care everyone! See you tomorrow, Laurie

Day 8: I changed my workout routine a bit and did it early in the morning instead of in the middle of the day. It worked well but I lacked sleep and felt tired right after. Also got some stomachache during the day so I felt pretty down. :( I managed to draw, cook and look for inspiration from professional artists in order to work on my art style. I now have a good idea of what I want to emulate from them and will work on that from now on. Also starting my comic books training tomorrow! Not gonna lie I didn't use Focusmate today for whatever reason. I'm pretty tired right now I'll head to bed. Take care everyone and thanks for reading. See you tomorrow, Laurie

@Erik2.0 Hello as promised here's a drawing I made today after watching the last My Hero Academia episode: Still have a lot to learn but I'll get there 😄 Day 7: Had very few cravings today but I noticed I kept going back to content regarding gaming, I will be more careful with these from now on by using Cold Turkey. I also am struggling to do my workout during the day so from now on I'll do it right after waking up. I will also start using Focusmate again, it helped me a lot some months ago to stay productive. Drank less coffee and felt less tired but I'm too heavy on sugar..I drew, cooked and went to get groceries. Even though I'm not playing I still kind of find ways to waste my time somehow, that's why I believe Focusmate will help me out. Anyway I'll go to sleep now, see you tomorrow! Take care, Laurie

@Erik2.0 Thanks again for your support! 😄 It's a bit late right now so I'll post some drawings tomorrow for sure. Day 6: Still felt tired and I suspect that excess caffeine is a bit guilty. I'll try to lower it down tomorrow. As always, I drew, cooked, slept and worked out. That's it. Take care everyone, See you tomorrow, Laurie

Hey everyone, here I come with a new entry! Day 5: Today was a lot like yesterday, I felt tired, moody and low on energy. I've managed to do the groceries, wash the dishes, draw and cook. I also did video editing for a friend. It kinda annoyed me at some point not gonna lie. That's about it. Sorry really my days are dull. Lol. Take care. See you tomorrow, Laurie

@BooksandTrees I'm sorry for what happened to you and I'm glad you healed through it. Rock climbing sounds awesome I'd love to make it my go to sport in the future. Thanks a lot for your support and yeah can't wait to get back and be done with my training! @Erik2.0 Ahah yeah push ups really are tiring. I found a good routine in order to do deep push ups, but before achieving them I need to go through several progressions(knee push ups, incline push ups and finally proper form push ups). I agree planks and superman are really great overall. Thanks a lot for your support! Day 4: Honestly there is nothing much to say about today. I just felt extremely tired and bored with everything I was doing, so I just slept most of the day. I managed to study one course and draw some boxes for perspective but really I just slept lol. Not gonna lie I was so bored that I had gaming cravings. I know it's part of the process but it was kind of frustrating. Hopefully tomorrow will be a bit more exciting ! Thanks for reading and take care. See you tomorrow, Laurie

@BooksandTrees Thanks again for your support and you are right I should just let it go, it's just that with his behaviour he could very well put someone else in danger and I can't accept it. Yes my family is home except for my mother who works at the hospital and I'm quite worried for her. I will keep to new activities! Day 3: Today I woke up late for my medical appointment during the morning, it put me in a bad mood especially because it upset my doctor, which is absolutely understandable. Writing in my gratitude journal really helped me feel better. I had some cravings because of what happened in the morning and also because I saw pictures of my fellow Air Force brigade members. They will soon be done with their military training while I had to come back home a month ago after an accident. I'm happy for them but at the same time it really saddened me to not be with them and that's when my cravings were the worst, it got me crying, for real. At least I've been able to put some work in my day and finished writing all my military courses on Anki, from now on I'll study them everyday until I get back to work. During my workout I noticed my push ups were too shallow, I need to get closer to the ground so I'm looking for some calisthenics program to improve them. I'll update my working routine as soon as possible. Anyway I'll go to sleep now and I'll see you tomorrow. Take care, Laurie

@BooksandTrees Thank you so much for your support. Doing Respawn Elite really pushed me to self investigate. @Erik2.0 Thank you for your support, I will definitely check the podcasts out now that I'm done with Respawn Elite! @ceponatia Thank you for your message, it means a lot ! I relate a lot with your story. Thanks for your support. Day 2 : I just finished the Respawn Elite course, and it has been quite helpful especially with the cravings I had today, knowing I had to finish it really kept me away from gaming. I met some rude guy at the supermarket today who wasn't respecting the safety distance regarding the COVID19, we had a talk and without going into details it really put me in a bad mood and that was the moment my craving was at its worst so I really need to be aware of social anxiety in order to quit gaming. But anyway, my new schedule is done, I set up a habitica account to track my new habits(especially the habit to not game) and coupled it with Beeminder, that way if I don't commit to my habits I will be charged 5$. It's an extra accountability measure I decided to take in order to stay committed because I know that wasting money for something that doesn't emotionally satisfy me is not acceptable for me. Meditating for 10min really put me in a relaxed state during the course, I will do this more often. I feel like starting a gratitude journal and committing to it every morning will be my game changer but I can't tell for sure right now. Anyway I'm proud of myself for finishing Respawn Elite and I can't wait to try my new schedule tomorrow. Thanks everyone for your support and I will see you tomorrow. Take care, Laurie

Hey everyone, so I already created a journal but relapsed since then. Today I bought the Respawn Elite program and I actually am going through it. I've had enough I think, of keeping myself away from happiness, and other people. I want to live and to love without shame. And I want to achieve my dreams, become a comic artist, travel. This is my first step, thank you for reading this and to support me. I wish you all the best. Day 1: I started the Respawn Elite program. For now I'm quite afraid of letting go of video games. Until now it was my safe place, my way to escape from the world and feel confident about myself. It's a big deal to let it go but I want to trust people now. I want to trust people with my heart and my feelings, I want to find comfort in them: my friends, my family and hopefully one day, my lover. I've always been afraid of romance. But I want to try and find out what it holds for me. I'll be starting module 2 of the program right after posting this topic. See you tomorrow!

@Icandothis Thank you so much for your support !! 😄

@BooksandTrees Thanks again for your support! 😄 Cardiac coherence is a way of breathing that makes your heart rate decrease and that way calms down your brain and your nervous system. It's especially useful for anxious persons like me. Usually you breath in for 5 seconds and breath out for the same amount of time, all that during 5 minutes total. Here's a video if you're interested in trying:

Thank you so much! @BooksandTrees Day # 3 Gratitude journal Today I've asked Riot Games's support team to delete my League Of Legends account. God knows how much time, energy and money I spent on these, deleting them is making me suffer but I've been spending all my time playing these past few days, even not sleeping last night. I'm hoping I'm making the right decision, it's time to move on to spend time on things that truly matter. Still I'm afraid of solitude as I'm a socially akward bean and I've always struggled to make friends... One amazing thing that happened/I did today Asked Riot Games's support to delete my LoL accounts Workout/run ((-10min of push ups and sit ups -2*30 sec of plank -2*30 sec of superman plank)) Will edit when I've done it Meditation I will update later today. I will do : 3min of cardiac coherence Visualisation I won't do that yet. Daily affirmation I'm moving on from my past and its comforting presence and I'm terrifying, but I think it's for the better. Reading + taking notes I'll update later today. I will: read at least 2 pages of a Laurent Gounelle book. My wake-up time None as I didn't sleep at night Weekly Goal(s) Keep up with my running workouts, be social in a healthy way, rest and heal properly in order to get back to work Start new hobbies to compensate LoL Monthly Goal Get back to work as a military, and also to draw daily. 3 Month Goal Keep in shape as a military and advance in my career, keep drawing and finish 2 chapters of Drawabox exercices. What went well today: I managed to be on time at some medical rendez-vous, by running. What I could have done to make my day better: I could have slept at night instead of playing League... What I will do differently tomorrow: I won't play League and start new hobbies and draw.

Day # 1 Gratitude journal Today I've decided to quit playing League Of Legends and I'm glad this community exists. One amazing thing that happened/I did today I started the Respawn program Workout/run -10min of push ups and sit ups -2*30 sec of plank -2*30 sec of superman plank Meditation I will update later today. I will do : 3min of cardiac coherence Edit : didn't do it unfortunately! I'll do better next time Visualisation I won't do that yet. Daily affirmation I need to focus on my dream and remind myself that's why I have my job, to work on that dream Reading + taking notes I'll update later today. I will: read at least 2 pages of a Laurent Gounelle book. Edit : didn't do it unfortunately! I'll do better next time My wake-up time 09:30am Weekly Goal(s) Keep up with my running workouts, be social in a healthy way, rest and heal properly in order to get back to work Monthly Goal Get back to work as a military, and also to draw daily. 3 Month Goal Keep in shape as a military and advance in my career, keep drawing and finish 2 chapters of Drawabox exercices. What went well today: I started the Respawn guide, joined this forum and wrote down why I was playing and why I want to quit! What I could have done to make my day better: I could have had a better quality of sleep by not playing League Of Legends all night. Also I could have had woken up earlier in the morning. Also just after waking up I started playing League... What I will do differently tomorrow: I'll wake up earlier and not start playing League Of Legends right after waking up but rather work on my projects.

Hello everyone, My name is Laurie, I'm 22 years old I'm an airforce military, 2 weeks ago I had a work incident which caused me to come back home to heal. Unfortunately not being around my friends is making me go back to bad habits like playing League Of Legends until late in the night. I will start working again pretty soon and I don't want to waste anymore time, I need to stay in shape for my job. Also my real goal in life is to be a comic book artist. I'd like to use this solo time I have to work on that dream and stop playing games. I'm glad I found a place with people who want to quit to. Thanks for your time and good luck everyone