NEW VIDEO: I Quit MMOs and THIS Happened
Mettermrck
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Posts posted by Mettermrck
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Sounds like you have a great plan, spearcrab. Welcome!
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Welcome, Andre! I'll help however much I can if you help me as well. ?
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Sounds like a great day, onlysoul, you're doing great!
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I know what you mean, Moe. My life hasn't gotten magically better when I withdrew the gaming, porn, and fast food. What I think it does is strip away my masks hiding me from my real problems. I still have to do the work but at least I know what I have to work on.
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Thanks, Celov, it's good to read encouraging stories from those ahead of me in the process. It looks like you've done awesome for yourself!
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Good on you for resisting your roommate's temptations!
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Day 14/90. Also 19/19/1. Almost two weeks without gaming yeah! It feels like an eternity and days just crawl by but that's just from being impatient with wanting to lose weight and being bored. I have to remind myself that any day without the "big three" (gaming, soda/fast food, and porn) is huge. Things are happening. I'm sad anxious and lonely sometimes because my brain is going crazy and changing. Just have to stick it out. Lile Cam said in a YouTube video yesterday: "my life is f'ed up!. . . face it". Without gaming, I face it.
Tried a walmart sparkling water the other day. Whoa too close to a soda and dangerous, fizz and everything. Nope can't do it.
I will try a little project work this weekend. Need a creative outlet.
My friend said I should consider getting to a gym and getting to know people. My work has a gym. I will contact the gym people and see what I can do.
About fapping. I think it happens when my brain won't shut up and I want to clear my head. From the moment I wake up my brain turns on with constant thinking even about stuff I can't do anything.to.change. i need to find healthier ways to clear my head. Usually I can walk but it was a monsoon this morning haha. I did do my pushups and situps but otherwise I laid back in bed and that's when the fapping came.
Maybe meditation? I need to find some relaxing meditation. I used to do some religious meditation but it brings back bad.memories of religious arguments sometimes. I thought about Headspace but not.sure.if I want to fork out the money.
Any free or cheaper alternatives?
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Thanks, Deep Space. I love the encouragement. Yeah I'm not as broken up about fapping as I would be if, say, I looked at porn. It's more that I want to reset my libido and take more pride in myself. I don't want to take it casually but I don't want to dread it either if you know what I mean.
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Yeah I tend to neglect my hygiene when things get tough. Sometimes a simple shower and shave can start the day off right. Stay strong you.can do it!
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It's weird how in your case, you have a girlfriend but you feel like she hinders your recovery sometimes. In my case, I'm separated from my wife and don't have to ask for permission but I feel incredibly lonely. Sometimes the grass isn't greener on the other side.
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Day 13/90. Also 18/18/1 soda porn fap. Yeah I relapsed on the fapping but I'm not beating myself up over it. I was just sitting there reading and it just hit me. I made sure to put my phone away so it wouldn't lead to porn. I'm not devastated, just disappointed. I want to reset my libido.
I kept myself busy yesterday. Went to church and ending up sitting behind.my father in law. It was awkward but at least I went. I'm sort of "letting it be" on the church front. I did a lot of reading, listening to podcasts, and watching Game Quitters youtube videos. That helped. I wanted to go to the beach but parking was ridiculous (June in Myrtle Beach forget it). I ended up going to our church chapel and just sat quietly for about 45 mins. It's extremely quiet, air conditioned, and got me out of the house.
I had a good talk with my Dad for Father's Day. That was nice. I'm.planning to drive down and visit him in a couple weeks. That'll be nice. Since I've started this process of quitting addictions, I don't feel the self-conscious guilt I've always felt with my Dad. I know I have a long road ahead but I'm proud of myself for getting moving.
Not too much anxiety. Some tough moments in church which is just sadness about the divorce and hating to feel like an outsider with my wife's family. I had some crying later on which I think is the usual fear of being broke and lonely. Talking to my family helps mitigate that. I'm getting there!
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I know it's hard. For some, it's easier to quit one addiction at a time. For me, I had to give up a whole pattern. Don't let a relapse discourage you. You can learn from it and keep going. I relapsed many times.
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Hi, Hayden, welcome to the forums! Yes the initial withdrawal can be rough but stick with it and it gets better.
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That's why I'm trying to abstain from multiple things: gaming, fast food, porn. Otherwise I binge on the ones I don't cut out. Just don't give up!
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Great job, Moe! You are pouring your excess time and energy from gaming into your own passions - your book and your family. This is well deserved on Father's Day. You should be proud.
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Good for you in shedding your gaming identity! I used to look forward to leaving work to go home and game, to the detriment of my work ethic. Now I don't have that and instead try to make the most of work itself and take pride in it.
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Keep it up, Chris, you're doing great!
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Day 12/90. Also 17/17/3 soda/porn/fap. Another bittersweet day yesterday. From a rational perspective, it was great. I went to church for a morning service and that was peaceful and then I ran errands. My wife invited me over to their family house to swim and I did. I enjoyed being around her family. I'm ashamed of how I've been these last years but it was nice to be welcomed.
Then my wife had to run errands and she invited me along. We shopped, got our fathers day gifts, and went from store to store almost like old times. She did drop the friend bomb once, but I let it pass. "It's nice that we can do this...as friends". I didn't contest the point as my words mean nothing after the dumb things I've done. All I can do is act and improve and hope that's enough.
I had a good day but was sad again at night. I called an old friend, my best man at my wedding from 8 yrs ago actually. We talked for an hour and it was a great talk. I needed it so badly. I haven't laughed like that in so long. He told me to remember a lot of these emotions I'm experiencing are chemicals. He said I sounded positive and with a good head on my shoulders.
I still shed tears almost daily but I know it's withdrawal symptoms and also I'm processing emotions I hid for a while.
Ending on a high note. I lost 3.2 lbs last week and am down to 308! A long way to go to my goals (200) but I'm glad the sweating and the light-headedness are paying off haha.
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Hi, DeepSpace and thanks! Yeah I feel like I'm in a slow death on the marriage. I see two roads. If I can save the marriage, then I would slip back into my old life and make it better, especially without these addictions. And if the marriage fails, I will take it as a sign that it's time to move on. I'd probably consider my own church, etc. I still want to work on a project, either a book or podcast, no matter what happens to my marriage.
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Hi, Chase! Ah D&D, good times. I played 2nd edition in high school and college. No I don't see it as breaking the detox. It's social and imaginative and you're not isolated when you do it. And if you're using the books, it's not technology based. I think its a cool idea. You'll have to let me know how it goes.
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Hey, Random, love the lifeboat metaphor. Yes, I'm discovering that quitting gaming isn't the magic pill by itself. For me, it's the bandaid being ripped off, exposing the actual wound to my eyes that I can't ignore and have to face.
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Nofap is hard because I like to tell myself that it's not so bad if I do it without porn. But I still get that dopamine hit that I'm trying to get away from.
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You are taking on a great quest, Onlysoul. Just take it one day at a time. That's what I say each morning when I wake up: "Just for today, I am not going back to gaming. Just for today, I am not going back to porn. Just for today, I am not going back to soda." and stay close to this community.
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Hey Sam welcome...you haven't wasted my time. We're glad you're here and ready to help!
Bob's Journey
in Daily Journals
Posted · Edited by Mettermrck
Hey, DeepSpace. I never really tried tea. For the most part, I drink a lot of ice water along with some milk and occasionally some crystal light iced tea. I don't feel that deprived. That comes mainly from eating a lot less than I used to.
I do need to work on the meditation or something. I feel like I'm getting bombarded regularly by anxiety boredom and loneliness. Anxiety comes from not having enough money and fearing the future. Boredom comes from not feeling challenged at my job and also finding things to do at home. And the loneliness comes from being isolated, losing my marriage and not having a lot of friends around me.