NEW VIDEO: I Quit MMOs and THIS Happened
AlexTheGrape
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Posts posted by AlexTheGrape
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What a great way to set people up with starting journals @Cam Adair!
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My wife is using a jawbone up3. which is a fitbind armband which tracks your steps, heart activity and sleeping rhytm. You can also program vibration alarms which allow you to warn yourself before going to bed. I see you tracking a lot of things and setting yourself alamrs in this diary so I thought maybe this would be interesting for you too.
Here is an amazon link so if you aren't itnerested don't click it
https://www.amazon.com/Jawbone-Heart-Activity-Sleep-Tracker/dp/B00N9E6DUK
It seems like a really good product, thanks for letting me know about it. I already wear a watch I've been given recently so I probably won't be getting it (I'll likely get it for my twin though hehe).
My alarms are set at certain times so that I get on with an assigned task for that time (e.g. I normally post my daily journal here at 8:00pm), but thank you for your recommendation.
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You're famous now @AlexTheGrape!
Also is regrettable that you story was confronted to the social engineered, outright fake personality of Ms. Twitchtits but hey! At least it was not Doctor "Playing games totally makes you kill your classmates with a katana" or a senile journalist eminence that has not ever seen a videogame. Improvements!
(Absolutely personal opinion, I like the smell of political incorrectness in the morning...)
Haha yes, thanks Hitaru! It's waning already, but I know that my experience will have helped inform a lot of people about video game addiction.
Yeah the contrast might have made me seem dull, but at least my personality was genuine. I agree, it's great that the media in NZ took the time to become informed on what the actual issues are.
Personal opinion and political incorrectness goes well with curry; it makes spicy memes.
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Silent Addiction by Sunday TVNZ featuring @AlexTheGrape
Whoa, you've never said to me that you have a twin that looks just like you!
We should talk more often than just 1 time. Despite the time zone!
How have you achieved to be featured on TV?
Greetings, Mad Pharmacist
Haha yeah I don’t really need to tell people online that I have a twin though, there’s not much chance of meeting him (especially on this community)!
Yeah sure thing, just let me know when you’d like to talk.
Yes I have aspired to be on TV a little, but I didn’t expect it to be about gaming or it to happen so early in my life!
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Watched it and I loved it. And to be entirely honest, I love your dad's reaction. He seems to be really happy about the fact, that his son is so full of courage to withstand a world that is so tempting, but instead invests more time and effort into his real life. I also loved that he said, he felt a little guilty about gifting you your first gaming console. Because, I often thought about that. Kids get easily excited and will jump at those things if they are in reach. However, your father could not have known - not at all - how the gaming industry would change over the years. He just had good intentions and that is great.
As said, I just loved your parts of the documentary.
Though one thing came to my mind and I am not sure how to think about it: They showed this female streamer and I felt weird while watching her. Let me explain that: When Alex talked to the journalist, he always looked so natural. His behavior was "well adjusted". Everything he did or said did not really feel staged. The same goes for his dad. But when the girl was being interviewed, I felt that she is lacking many actual social skills. She looked like she felt insecure and she said, that she just wants to be an inspiration to other people. Now what instantly came to my mind was that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. Don't get me wrong. I don't want to diminish her or what she does for a living. But I felt like she found a way to replace her real personality with a virtual personality. Like, replacing the real life insecurities with a overly happy and funny virtual her. I had the same thoughts for the part, when she said that she screams a lot and thus would make people laugh. I asked myself, why is that? Might it be because people are sitting in front of their screens, feeling somewhat lonely and would instead love to sit with somebody and laugh and have fun and have a feeling of company? Is her show - and that is what it is afterall, a show - just simulating this feeling? So isn't this basically an inspiration to sit alone and simulate the feelings that you would actually want to have? As said, I am thinking about this. This is not a judgement or something, but it felt so strange to see Alex and then her. He was so entirely natural, so calm and his feelings were so ... I don't know, natural as well. If anybody has any thoughts on that, I would love to read them, because my personal point of view will only limit me.
And again, Alex, what I just watched was heartwarming and extremely motivational. I love it.
Hi Robert,
Thanks for taking the time to write a long response, I really appreciate it.
I like your take on my dad’s reactions and thoughts on gaming, it would be similar to a lot of parents out there. There are many hidden costs of investing time in virtual realities and virtual worlds whether they be on TV or in video games, as many can eventually decide they like to spend their time in the virtual world rather than face their real world problems.
I’m really glad you liked the documentary, it seems you took a lot out of it.
I don’t know about the Lorien’s personality, I actually have had zero contact with her, but I agree that it is likely to be partially or mostly acting because her service is entertainment after all. I won’t comment on her level of social skills as that can’t really be judged from a short video, but you could well be right. In any case it could be considered You could be completely right with the streamer, her intentions of being ‘inspirational’ seems to be irrelevant because the most likely things streaming would ‘inspire’ people to do would be to spend more time playing video games, to donate money, and watch her streams. Yep you’re right, playing games IS all about stimulating feelings, as the accomplishments and friends made online simply don’t last when you turn off the computer.
So yes I’d agree that there is a stark contrast in how genuine the streamer and myself seemed, and it might reflect how we approach life in general (i.e. I’m for getting on with real life, she’s for making the most of the virtual world). Of course this is just my opinion, so you can take out of it what you like.
Thanks again for your response, it gave some great points to think about.
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Loved the documentary. I'm amazed with what you've done with your life in such a short time!
Thanks dude! Yeah there are a lot of activities you can start to replace gaming, and getting on with those have helped me with making a lot of progress during and after my detox attempts.
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Awesome! And the TVNZ also did a great job on the subject.
@Cam Adair you better get prepared, they are out for your head! (0:52)
Thanks! Yeah it's great that TVNZ made an effort to really get into this topic, as it's not known to be an issue by the public in general.
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Post-Detox Day 208
Today has been a good one in general, I again accomplished my goal of 9 x 50 minute study sessions. Unfortunately I didn’t exercise this morning as I got up late, I went to bed late since I had to round our dogs up who had escaped outside. I’m glad I did so much work despite being tired though, so I should clap myself on the back for that hard work.
Gratitude journal
I am grateful for my caring family.
I am grateful that my story has helped so many people that I hear about every day.
I am grateful for being able to study at school whilst on leave.
One amazing thing that happened/I did today
Hearing from staff at the school that they liked my TV story helped make my day a great one, and it seemed to make theirs too by being part of the story in a way.
Workout/run
Nope.
Meditation
Yup.
Visualisation
Nope.
Daily affirmation
Nope.
Reading + taking notes
Nope.
Getting to bed before 9pm
Nope.
Weekly Goal(s)
I want to make sure to do 9 x 50 minute study sessions daily, with exceptions for days in which I don’t have the full amount of time free for studying (i.e. working or other necessary activities).
Monthly Goal
This month I want to have exercised for at least 20 minutes every day, and I’ll leave an error margin of 3 days in which I won’t fail this goal by not exercising.
3 Month Goal (2 months left!)
My three month goal is to develop my leadership skills enough to confidently coach a sports team or lead another form of community group.
What went well today:
Sticking to my goal helped motivate me throughout the day. Taking the time to catch up with friends during lunch was a great moral booster as well.
What didn’t go well today:
I didn’t get enough sleep, and as a result wasn’t up for exercising this morning.
What I could have done to make my day better:
I could have set my alarms to warn me of how much time I had left before bed time.
What I will do differently tomorrow:
I’m going to set my alarms, I’ll make sure to have a proper workout session in the morning.
Photo Stream
I took these (and lots more!) on a day out at a local library when I took my camera with me to take photos during breaks. #nationalPride
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My post for yesterday:
Post-Detox Day 207
Today has been a superb day of studying, I accomplished my goal of doing 9 x 50 minutes of study sessions, and accomplished my other daily tasks as well. What’s even more is that because I succeeded in the structured approach to achieve my goal, I ended up with about an hour of free time at the end of the day to enjoy watching TV with my family.
Workout/run
Yep.
Meditation
Yep.
Visualisation
Yep.
Daily affirmation
Yep.
Reading + taking notes
Nope.
Getting to bed before 9pm
9:10pm, not bad.
Weekly Goal(s)
I want to make sure to do 9 x 50 minute study sessions daily, with exceptions for days in which I don’t have the full amount of time free for studying (i.e. working or other necessary activities).
Monthly Goal
This month I want to have exercised for at least 20 minutes every day, and I’ll leave an error margin of 3 days in which I won’t fail this goal by not exercising.
3 Month Goal (2 months left!)
My three month goal is to develop my leadership skills enough to confidently coach a sports team or lead another form of community group
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Wow thats some a crazy goal. I mean I am 8hours a day at work but I am far from 8x50min of productive work. Time to up my game.
Thanks Mario! It can take a bit of work to get up to that level, but I'm sure you'll be able to manage. Starting early (on the bus at 7:20) and trying to minimize procrastination helps me do the best I can, so perhaps that might help you too. Best of luck upping your game!
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Thanks everyone, I'm humbled that it resonated with you all so much.
I'm rather busy at the moment so I'll reply to all your comments (and some journals I read) tomorrow or in the next few days, I'm studying at 110% effort at the moment as I have important exams only a week away.
Thanks again for the support guys!
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All right, I got your point bro.
I should try to do something similar (studying on university during lectures/seminars etc. also counts, and do it at least 8x50 min. it's also my favourite block of time to work!
)Btw. is your goal right now to achieve 8x50 min. every day, including weekends (even if it's hard) or do you give yourself a day off during week?
Greetings, Mad Pharmacist
Good luck with your studies! I will often make it 45 minutes with a 5 minute break (most often a walk, quick run, or quick workout) to help keep the blood flowing so it might help you to try that as well.
I upped my goal to 9x50 minutes every day now! It gets a bit hazy in the weekends as I have a job now and tend to work on Fridays and will end up tired the next day and so on. Normally I'd give myself Friday afternoon off to do restful activities, but since I work pretty much every Friday now, I need to change my plans (haven't decided on how I'll address this yet, but I'll likely give myself Saturday evening off or something).
Best of luck with your challenge and your studies!
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Post-Detox Day 206
Today has been a good day in general. I’ve been feeling better in the morning, so I think the fever is going away. I got an okay amount of work done, but it’s not up to my normal standards as I simply didn’t do it for long enough and with enough focus. I’ll make sure to go to school to study for the day so that I am in a proper working environment.
Gratitude journal
I am grateful for having a room to myself.
I am grateful for having a brother just like me.
I am grateful for having running shoes.
One amazing thing that happened/I did today
Getting out for a quick run was a great refresher. It brought a big smile to my face!
Workout/run
Yep.
Meditation
Nope.
Visualisation
Yep.
Daily affirmation
Yep.
Reading + taking notes
Nope.
Getting to bed before 9pm
Nope.
Weekly Goal(s)
I want to make sure to do 9 x 50 minute study sessions daily, with exceptions for days in which I don’t have the full amount of time free for studying.
Monthly Goal
Last month goal: My goal for this month will to be to follow through with any commitments I make – whether it be goals, leadership, or anything.
I unfortunately didn’t keep to all my commitments this month, mostly to do with exercising. I think I’ll need another/new accountability partner to keep me up to doing this as I’ve been having difficulty keeping myself motivated and accountable for exercising daily.
3 Month Goal (2 months left!)
My three month goal is to develop my leadership skills enough to confidently coach a sports team or lead another form of community group.
What went well today:
Exercising in a couple of studying breaks helped bring my energy back up.
What didn’t go well today:
I did plenty of procrastination and didn’t have a full exercise session to start the day.
What I could have done to make my day better:
I could have meditated and had a full exercise session in the morning.
What I will do differently tomorrow:
I’m going to make sure that I get a new accountability partner, go to school for a full day of studying, and stick to my morning schedule.
Photo Stream
I need to keep up the good looks in my journal, so I'll start uploading my photography again.
These three pictures were some of the ones I took whilst being filmed, which is in a couple of short scenes in the Sunday program I've been featured in.
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Wow, indeed you answered all my questions and even more
! It seems that indeed minimizing the gaming influences at least temporarily is the best thing to do now; as you said, the people truly caring about me would stay in my life in a way or another that way. Actually this was a huge concern for me. Mainly because I have had my own detoxes and relapses too, even though they were not like "official". Every single time the relapse was related to my friends' pressure. This made me feel better, thanks man! You're welcome, all the best man!
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Here’s a quick post for yesterday:
Post-Detox Day 205
Today I’ve been down with a fever, and as a result have been mostly trying to recover from it. I passed a driving test, and did plenty of driving so I got a reasonable amount done.
I’ve received a lot of positive feedback and support from family and friends for the show I’ve been on recently, which you can find here: http://forum.gamequitters.com/topic/1807-master-list-of-media-interviews/#comment-22692
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Silent Addiction by Sunday TVNZ featuring @AlexTheGrape
Awesome, can't wait to hear what the community thinks!
Really interesting, I also feel like I got to know YOU a little better
Thanks! Yeah I'm sure it does
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At first I thought the footage of "you" with long-hair was old footage. Halfway through I realized it was your twin.
Haha yes we look very similar!
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Hi @Yani!
Thank you, I’m glad you got something out of it.
It’s now been 290+ days since I started my final detox (my third one, the one I succeeded in), but it bears mentioning that it’s 99.9% video game free as I had one final game with my old gamer friends not long after I completed my detox (and I then continued to go 100% video game free). This ties in with what I’ll mention about gaming friends, which I’ll get to soon.
We’ve had very similar situations, it is indeed very difficult to stay out of video games when they’re on hand and if you’re living with someone who plays them a lot. Having that influence resulted in relapses in my attempts to quit gaming even before I attempted a 90 day detox, and it was a big factor in both my detox relapses. So how I cope is relatively simple now, as I just need to make sure I don’t watch him play games whenever possible. In the past I’ve struggled with this, and I’ll quote from my two 90 day detox relapses to give a bit of insight on this.
My first relapse (from my first attempt at the detox):
“No excuses. I've relapsed. On the last day of school I felt I needed a ‘reward’ and having been bored for weeks without games; and just started playing games when I saw my brother on Dark Souls 2. I had played about 2 hours a day since Wednesday and the guilt has crept in and my family are disappointed with my lack of commitment.
I have questioned why I am quitting gaming recently, it hasn’t actually harmed me and I have enjoyed playing them, I still get good grades so why torment myself? I then come back to the idea that I can do much more with my time and can improve myself with the time I would be spending on games.”
My second relapse (from my second attempt at the detox):
“Today I had decided to play an hour of Halo on my brother's new console. It wasn't very fun, and nowhere near as fun as I remember it being.”
So as you can see, my brother’s influence was a big factor in both relapses. Furthermore the most recent time I played games (with my old gamer friends) came as a result of them being invited over by him and that they decided to play their games IN MY BEDROOM for the night, and purchased a copy of the game for me to play (you can’t get much more influence to play then that!). I don’t mean to put any blame on my brother though, it’s not up to him to change anything he does simply because I wanted to change. The thing in common with all of these events was having the influence of one or more gamers, and that for the duration of time I was successful in quitting gaming I avoided those influences.
As you mentioned, the easiest way to succeed in quitting gaming would be to move on from those people. In my experience it was difficult at first because my gamer friends simply didn’t recognise or respect my decision to quit gaming, and continued to ask me to play with them. Luckily though, you don’t have to cut them out of your life to still not have influence to game. I’m still in contact with those people and I occasionally see them for other things such as parties and meetups, but what you’ll find is that if you minimize your contact with them temporarily, you’ll see which ones actually care about you and which of them simply were friends because you could play video games with them. It’s up to you how you deal (or not) with your gamer friends, but my experiences point to the fact that as long as they game, they still want you to play with them, and you keep close/regular contact with them, you’ll have a very strong influence to play the games which will be very difficult to overcome.
I minimized the gaming influences in my life from making sure to not watch anyone play them (in real life, online or otherwise), not reading about games, and not talking about them. However that’s just a small part of the challenge, as I needed new activities to ‘fill the void’ and make new friends that didn’t play video games.
Oh don’t worry, you haven’t offended anyone in the slightest. My brother has felt a little bit of pressure to quit gaming before, but what he does now is he tries to minimize how much he plays during important times so that he can do the best work for exams.
I’m sorry to hear that you felt upset when you watched the pro-gaming scene, but I think it’ll be a good indicator for you that you could perhaps have been too attached/dependent on it. Moving on from gaming requires giving up an identity of a ‘gamer’, as we’d pride ourselves in our ability to play. It hence can be very difficult to do, and often requires one to forge a new identity through picking up new activities.
I hope this helps you and answers your questions. All the best man!
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@AlexTheGrape, GQ ambassador in NZ!
To be honest, I don't have a finished version of a mission statement. Instead, I use my affirmations for it. In the 7 Habits, the mission statement is refered to in terms of your roles, but I'm still searching for my roles, as atm I find it hard to see (or name) roles for myself except my role as a husband. I have affirmations of purpose, affirmations of self-respect, affirmations of power and love, affirmations of serenity and confidence and affirmations of gratitude, which kind of covers my principles in one way of another. I'd like to shape them into a statement as soon as I can see my roles clearly.
Haha yes I'm one of the only people in the community from NZ, we're a small country!
Thank you Reno for sharing how your affirmations work. Tonight I'll probably get working on a proper mission statement as I have written down all the general ideas I want to have in it.
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Silent Addiction by Sunday TVNZ featuring @AlexTheGrape
Very Cool!
Thank you! I'm glad you liked it
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You made us all proud!
Thanks Cam
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Considering how much has happened recently, I would have journaled yesterday, but unfortunately I have a fever and haven't gotten round to much other than trying to sleep and drinking hot tea. Oh, and doing a driving test this morning, which I passed. I can now drive people whenever I want! (Having had no alcohol of course). I also got a curious look today presumably because they recognized me from on TV.
My post for yesterday:
Today has been the BIG DAY. Why? It was the day in which the TVNZ Sunday program aired that myself and my twin have been featured in. My family and friends have been waiting for this one for a few months, and it's finally been shown throughout New Zealand. I got all positive feedback from friends and family, which was wonderful.
Considering how much has happened recently, I would have journaled yesterday, but unfortunately I have a fever and haven't gotten round to much other than trying to sleep and drinking hot tea. Oh, and doing a driving test this morning, which I passed. I can now drive people whenever I want! (Having had no alcohol of course). I also got a curious look today presumably because they recognized me from on TV.
My post for yesterday:
Today has been the BIG DAY. Why? It was the day in which the TVNZ Sunday program aired that myself and my twin have been featured in. My family and friends have been waiting for this one for a few months, and it's finally been shown throughout New Zealand. I got all positive feedback from friends and family, which was wonderful.
Gratitude journal
I am grateful for the opportunity to be on TV.
I am grateful for my caring and supportive friends.
I am grateful for the growth of this community.
One amazing thing that happened/I did today
Definitely seeing myself on TV! It was nerve-racking to see how it was all put together at the same time as the rest of NZ, but I’m glad my story is now out there.
Workout/run
Yup.
Meditation
Yup.
Visualisation
Yup.
Daily affirmation
Yup.
Reading + taking notes
Nope.
Getting to bed before 9pm
Nope.
Weekly Goal(s)
I want to make sure to do 8 x 50 minute study sessions daily, with exceptions for days in which I don’t have the full amount of time free for studying.
Monthly Goal
My goal for this month will to be to follow through with any commitments I make – whether it be goals, leadership, or anything.
3 Month Goal
My three month goal is to develop my leadership skills enough to confidently coach a sports team or lead another form of community group.
What went well today:
Getting my morning schedule done helped a lot.
What I could have done to make my day better:
Keeping up my effort throughout the day could have been accomplished with more exercise, so more exercise is needed.
What I will do differently tomorrow:
Exercise more!
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Silent Addiction by Sunday TVNZ featuring @AlexTheGrape
Awesome, can't wait to hear what the community thinks!
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Thanks @AlexTheGrape
You're welcome
Paul's Journal
in Daily Journals
Posted
All the best for going without TV and games! Getting off the forum for a bit might help you stay off of computers in general.