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Hi, my name is Josh and I just got the respawn program.

 A little about myself I'm currently 38. I've been addicted to video games for most of my life. I was bullied a lot in school and never really had friends, acquaintances at most. Video game were a big escape for me. My social skills weren't that great and I was also addicted to porn. I hated my life pretty much all my twenties and used games to numb the pain, but got to a big low point when I turned 30 when i could no longer numb it, pretty suicidal, and i made a choice: to get busy living or get busy dying. I choose to get busy living and began a long process to turn my life around. Doing everything myself, stopped playing video games and using porn cold turkey. Stopping porn was much more difficult lol. Started a journal and slowly began to make changes. Had relapses along the way. It took about four years to start making bigger changes doing things out of my comfort zone. Started going to the gym a ton, joined toastmasters (public speaking), getting a motorcycle, joined an improv group, started doing bjj and finally got a girlfriend. 

 Recently I've realized that my big "why" or motivation for making big changes was that i wanted to have a girlfriend. I've been in a great relationship for the past three years. But just now realizing that I've been becoming stagnant since my why has been fulfilled. 

 When covid hit I haven't be able to do my other outlets such bjj and improv and this past year and I've found myself falling back into playing video games and the feeling its really starting to impact my life again. I do realize i need to keep making new goals in life, lol.

I've quit video games before but figured trying out a program this time instead of doing it the hard way.


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