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Elohim

Today is a good day to quit gaming... again

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Hello, I'm Leo and I live in the Caribbean. English isn't my native language, so please bear with me.

I'm 24 years old and started playing video games when I was 4. It wasn't an issue back then but as I grew older I began to spend more time gaming.

I mostly played rpgs (elder scrolls, dragon age, fable), strategy (age of empires, warcraft, starcraf) trading card games (Yu-Gi-Oh) on desktop. In my country everyone plays pirate games, so it's extremely cheap to be a hardcore gamer. I played pretty much every big  single player game released between 2005-2014.

Eventually a friend of mine introduced me to Dota, and that's when I started to take gaming very seriously. I was aiming to become a Pro player, and spent all my free time playing Dota, watching replays and discussing strategies with my teammates. 

When I entered college and moved to live by myself my gaming habit became much stronger. During week days I would play every minute I wasn't in school or sleeping. I even started to neglect sleeping at some point, waking up in the middle of the night to play till I fell asleep from exhaustion. 

Gaming has greatly influenced my social interactions: aside from colleagues at school most of my friends where hardcore gamers like myself. Needless to say my contact with girls was very limited, which caused me major frustration and deep depression. 

In 2017, after a long period of isolation, and continuous gaming with pauses only for watching porn, I hit rock bottom when I failed my 2nd year of college. I quit gaming cold turkey, and for a while life became very different for me. I found my passion in learning foreign languages, and started spending my time studying Japanese and Chinese as well as practicing them with native speakers which in turn helped me make new friends who weren't related to gaming. It lasted for a year and a half. 

In late 2018 3G Mobile Data arrived to my country and with it endless possibilities for gaming. I already had internet access before that but not on a daily basis. I started playing mobile games online (Mobile Legends, Afk Arena, hearthstone, Ragnarok Eternal Love). In no time I was back to gaming all day. The chance to play online was something I always longed for back in the days, and now I felt every second not spent playing was a waste. 

Internet is very expensive here and always playing using Data has taken a dent in me finances. All my money goes to eating, drinking coke and internet. I even spent real life currency for a couple in game transactions in pay to win games. 

Now I'm back to the point where I HAVE to quit gaming or my whole life is gonna crumble. I did it once in the past, but I still can't believe I had the strength to do it in the first place. I hope I'll be able to repeat the miracle. 

I'll keep a journal here keeping track of my progress.

Edited by Elohim
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