28 year old, college dropout, little job experience. Feeling helpless

[A]

I dont even know where to start. Recently for whatever reason I have realized I have a problem with video games and am attempting to resist them, even though by doing so I feel very helpless and in a bad place as this fog of gaming clears. Im realizing i have little job experience and I am a college dropout. Ultimately im realizing im a loser, and while i was focusing on being the best at this game or that game others were getting educated and building careers, they are buying houses, getting married, having kids, meanwhile ive been unemployed for 3 years and living with my mother with no current prospects for a brighter future. im lucky to have a gf of 9 years still who is coming to her breaking point, and i dont blame her. I just dont know where to begin, i feel like ive dug myself into this deep dark hole and im just waking up to realizing it. Any advice would be appreciated.

[destoroyah]

Welcome.

Yea, forget time for now. It only adds pressure. Focus on quitting gaming, and find out what step to take next. Every moment counts, like in a car accident when you have that "omfg" moment. You could start studying again in another field. If you play it right you can still be a good bachelor with 30-something. If that's not your thing, try to get some shitty job (anything will do) to gather experience. And don't feel ashamed for selling burgers or serving people, everybody starts there - or something like that.

Other people are not good for comparisons, since many only do tell the good things about themselves. Buying a house is cool, but don't worry, some people lose their house in a hurricane or a fire. So when someone buys a house, it's good, when it burns, it's bad. If there is no house bought, it's nothing. That's pretty neutral in my book. Could be worse, eh?

Thinking of yourself as a failure is rather unproductive, you will only develop a swampy behind. So if there is some fighting spirit left in ya, try standing, taking responsibility and action. Taking control over simple crap first, like householding and cooking, to gather some skills for a couple of months. And then step out. Or whatever suits ya, it's your life.

Good luck.

Edited March 5, 2017 by destoroyah

[Cam Adair]

Welcome to the community. Start with the 90 day detox, and if you can, grab a copy of Respawn - it will help you a lot with the step-by-step process to turn your situation around. Otherwise, make sure you watch this video to find the 3 types of activities you want to replace gaming with, to avoid feeling bored in which case, you'll just want to game.