My life is vanishing.

[VS]

Hi.

I'm 30 years old. I never worked in my life. I receive a small money from rental of a house that was from my deceased mother. This is the only money I get, and I'm responsible for my sustain. I already dropped out 3 times of 3 different universities. I'm currently matriculated in a engineering course, but I it's only in order to eat the free lunch and dinner.

I live alone in a rented room and have no friends, only going out to eat. I wake up and start a mixture of gaming, wikipedia and my country's imageboard. Than I go to sleep. It's been like this since my 18.

 Year after year is getting worse. Sometimes I think that now I made to the end of the hole, but always can be a little deep. Even my healthy is deteriorating because I started to drink 1L of a inexpensive and garbage local soda almost every day since last year.

It feels like I slept with 20 and awaked with 30, really old and with regrets.

I can't awake up and realize I have 40.

Gaming and browsing mindless in the internet has to go. Has to go forever. It has been years that it isn't funny anymore.

[Alex]

Recognizing that you want to make a change in your life is the first step. I found the Respawn program (and associated e-book) incredible helpful in putting words to what I was feelings, and providing direction as to the changes I needed to make.  The process of moving toward a better life can be done one small step at a time.  Start with making small easily obtainable goals for yourself (no soda for 1 day, trade 30 minutes of gaming for 30 minutes of walking outside, ect). You'll find that that small accomplishments make the larger ones seem more obtainable.  It doesn't matter how fast you go, only that you're going in the right direction, and right this moment is the best place to start. Best of luck!

Cheers

[Cam Adair]

Welcome!

[fanzio]

hey!

i had a year in my life like that and it's possible to move to a great life!

i still have some disorders, but the thing for me was to stop feeling guilty. 

the small step by small step is a good starting point. speaking to people and taking pleasure with social things was key. 

people are nice :-) and helpful.

watching Cam video is a big help. even if the style is a bit too much american for me, he is sincere and the style goes to a very secoundary plan (btw, thanks again Cam! and success to your project!)

also maybe you could get some help from your university? am sure some of your teachers would understand and support you.

anyway you are young! i changed my life completely at 34years old, you are younger than that!

hold on!

[Cam Adair]

btw, thanks again Cam! and success to your project!

Thanks!

[Colin]

Hi.

I'm 30 years old. I never worked in my life. I receive a small money from rental of a house that was from my deceased mother. This is the only money I get, and I'm responsible for my sustain. I already dropped out 3 times of 3 different universities. I'm currently matriculated in a engineering course, but I it's only in order to eat the free lunch and dinner.

I live alone in a rented room and have no friends, only going out to eat. I wake up and start a mixture of gaming, wikipedia and my country's imageboard. Than I go to sleep. It's been like this since my 18.

 Year after year is getting worse. Sometimes I think that now I made to the end of the hole, but always can be a little deep. Even my healthy is deteriorating because I started to drink 1L of a inexpensive and garbage local soda almost every day since last year.

It feels like I slept with 20 and awaked with 30, really old and with regrets.

I can't awake up and realize I have 40.

Gaming and browsing mindless in the internet has to go. Has to go forever. It has been years that it isn't funny anymore.

Some people don't "wake up" in their entire lifetime. This process will take time, effort and be painful but you have support in us. Lean on us and stay the course. 

[EvergreenAxe467]

Hey,

If you're anything like me, well addiction is addiction, be it drugs, virtual reality/ video games, etc. They all have commonalities brother. The 1st step there that you took was that you've had it, and apparently you're awake to the problem(s) and want to change.

Now how do you handle it? Continue to give these things even the slightest foothold? Any open door or window you leave allows these things to enter in. I suggest getting the strength enough to cut those ties at some point. You may need to start to taper some of it off gradually and replace some of that time with other activity, excersise, experience in the real world etc. It's gonna be hard no doubt. But these things want you to remain shackled to them, then they know they have you. 

Be courageous.

I'll pray for your fight and for your freedom and victory.