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My Journal - Alex


AlexTheGrape

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Attempt II Day 47

No complaining day 3 

Nice that you got to spend time with your little brother in a meaningful way! On a day like this when you wake up drowsy try a cold shower first thing. I always do it when I'm away for work and the nights are too short. If you want to preserve water (e.g. you are training later and will have to shower anyway) try running cold water on your head. I find that the face, the back of the neck and the upper back react very well to cold.

That won't work. If you increase total distance you just keep stimulating your low-twitch muscle fibers while eating up more calories. Running slightly faster has the same effect. To build muscle you need time under tension, progressive overload, and good nutrition.

Try the 30-20-10 workout: it incorporates sprints and it was the program for runners I enjoyed the most. Keep in mind that your gains will be very moderate anyway.

You'd better complement with some essential bodyweight exercises like push-ups, squats, pull-ups or chin-ups, dips, plank.

Thank you Tom, that was some stellar advice. I will try out the 30-20-10 workout tomorrow. It looks promising and would be a good way for me to get some sprints in. I suppose I should be doing bodyweight exercises, I have dropped off doing them as I did it really inconsistently before. I will make this a new habit to build, and do it immediately after my morning runs.

It's been a while since I've read your journal.  I love the format you use for documenting the events of the day and the frank honesty you use!  Also, congrats on your success on attempt 2!

Thanks Joe, its people like you that make online journalling worthwhile with such optimism. I would say I've definitely doubled the time I had elapsed compared to my last attempt; this time I'm not giving up!

 

Today was a cheerful one for me because I have finished about 95% of my Christmas shopping! At my place my two brothers and I have to spend our own money on presents for the rest of the family (even though we have no solid source of income) so the gifts we choose are always heartfelt in a good way. I feel ready to hear Christmas songs all the time.

I got all my daily habits done and dusted, although everything seems to have been interrupting my guitar jam sessions today and yesterday. To that end, I will make sure to put my guitar somewhere very visible so that I am more inclined to continue it once I get back from whatever job I was doing. I had a cold(ish) shower this morning, but it went hotter in the last 2 minutes without me doing anything so I just rolled with it.

I didn't find python programming that interesting today. This is probably because the novelty of being suddenly engaged with problem solving activities has worn off. Regardless, I put a good hour or so in!

I have decided to cut down on my sugar intake, and once I manage that I will then redirect my diet to help my muscle development etc. I have decided to do this because I know that eating sugary foods is just impulsive behaviour aimed at satisfying myself for a very brief period of time. If I am to continue developing more difficult habits to master, I will need more experience with resisting urges such as these. I will make sure to avoid foods that have loads of additional sugar, and reduce my intake of such foods as much as I can. Enough regular desserts for me! I will just stick to special occasions for dessert.

Once I find my Kindle (I haven't seen it for the past day :/) I will take notes from The Slight Edge as I read through it again and from You are not so Smart. I have a list of good books to read next, but has anybody got some suggestions on ones that are beneficial such as the books I mentioned?

I have been applying for lots of jobs online, and finally got an email back from one of them (Burger King). It wasn't what I had hoped for, just acknowledging that the application is still on file because I hadn't been selected for the job they were hiring for. Hopefully job application emails should start rolling in and with luck I can land a job.

3 Things I'm grateful for:

I am grateful for being one of the resilient people that have made it this far through the no gaming detox. There are only a handful of people that are keeping a journal on this forum and are relatively far through the detox.

I am grateful that the bakery I had my lunch at still had 'double happy' double size sausage rolls that I love. I'm aware these would have a lot of fat in them, should I be avoiding those too in my lowered sugar intakes?

I am grateful for having the time to spend with my little brother and step-dad to play Settlers of Catan.

One amazing thing that happened today:

After I bought the last of the presents I needed to, I felt a great sense of relief, as Christmas shopping has always been a difficult task for me, especially when cousins are coming around. I can now rest peacefully!

What I could have done to make my day better:

I could have been quicker to write today's post. I forgot to do envisioning after meditation, so hopefully I will remember this time. Other than that I've done pretty good today!

What I will do differently tomorrow:

I will make sure to write my post quicker and not babble about everything I've done today. I will do envisioning tomorrow morning and stick to my trello board to get the highest priority tasks finished.

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Once I find my Kindle (I haven't seen it for the past day :/) I will take notes from The Slight Edge as I read through it again and from You are not so Smart. I have a list of good books to read next, but has anybody got some suggestions on ones that are beneficial such as the books I mentioned?

My suggestions are choose one of these 3:

  1. Think & Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill
  2. Awaken the Giant Within by Tony Robbins
  3. Gorilla Mindset by Mike Cernovich

These 3 books cover similar materiel, Both Think & Grow Rich and Awaken the Giant are huge books.  They both go into a lot of detail.  Gorilla Mindset is much shorter and not as detailed, but it does give you techniques you can use straight away.

Other books I'd recommend include:

  1. 1984 by George Orwell
  2. Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazzi
  3. How to Become a Straight A student by Cal Newport
  4. Switch by Chip and Dan Heath
  5. The Drunkard's Walk by Leonard Mlodinow
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Attempt II Day 48

No complaining day 4

I will make this entry shorter as I planned to. I did not use my time well today in many areas, but I had a run in the afternoon (I tried the new running method Tom suggested and it was a real workout!), and put a lot of time into programming and guitar practice.

I reduced my sugar intake slightly, it's hard to cut myself off as much as I would like because my brothers just devour all the tasty food if I don't, and most of the food we have at home contains sugars anyway. If I can reduce my intake slightly every day I believe I should end up fine.

I made a new friend today, and spent a lot of time talking about Samoa, a place we've both been to in common.

I forgot to do my visualisation today, I will put a physical note on my phone for this.

Three things I'm grateful for:

I am grateful for being able to help myself to food when I want it.

I am grateful for water bottles.

I am grateful for the invention of currency.

I took the time to be grateful about these things instead of writing a lot about them, and it feels much better than what I used to do.

One amazing thing that happened today:

Today I tried the 30-20-10 running method, and I loved it! I completed about 9 cycles I believe, I have never breathed harder in my life! By the time I got home I was exhausted but fit in some body weight exercises. I felt like I had done a very good workout, and this is surely the way to got to not only stay fit, but to get fitter! Thanks Tom for the suggestion to try this. Also how do you tag people on comments like these?

What I could have done to improve my day:

I could have made better use of my time in all areas of my day. I should not leave things up to memory like the need to visualise in the morning.

What I will do differently tomorrow:

I will time myself to do each activity on my trello wall that I do, to make sure I do them with some haste. I will use that note I just wrote to visualise in the morning. I will reduce my sugar intake even more.

 

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I love the no complaining tag, since you mentioned optimism was a thing you wanted to work on in your first post aha. The way you said you were robotic and logical makes me think learning python will be a good fit for you. You should find a hackerspace near you and get involved! "Hackerspaces are community-operated physical places, where people share their interest in tinkering with technology, meet and work on their projects, and learn from each other." 

Also a few questions: 1. What is this visualizing thing you do in the morning?  2. What is your main source of sugar intake? (Drinks, carbs, candy, etc) 3. May I adopt your journal style? I love the pre-built sections to focus on!

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Hey Alex.

Just an idea, but one thing your reduced sugar intake goal can help you with is encouraging you to learn how to cook. I'm sure your parents currently handle most of that, but you may be able to help them in the future and try out some other recipes (lower in sugar). :)

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I love the no complaining tag, since you mentioned optimism was a thing you wanted to work on in your first post aha. The way you said you were robotic and logical makes me think learning python will be a good fit for you. You should find a hackerspace near you and get involved! "Hackerspaces are community-operated physical places, where people share their interest in tinkering with technology, meet and work on their projects, and learn from each other." 

Also a few questions: 1. What is this visualizing thing you do in the morning?  2. What is your main source of sugar intake? (Drinks, carbs, candy, etc) 3. May I adopt your journal style? I love the pre-built sections to focus on!

Hi Laney, thanks for taking the time to read my journal! I also appreciate the advice to find a hackerspace. I looked it up and found one somewhat near me, and I might go to it next time available.

1. The visualisation I do in the morning is an activity I am trying to get into the habit of. I listen to music with a build-up and try to visualise in my head and feel the emotions I would feel after achieving one of my larger goals, or just the ideal day. For example this morning after meditating, I visualised myself running in perfect weather and the feeling of accomplishment after a run. After this I felt pumped to get started. I realised that visualisation is a powerful tool after learning of Cam's experiences with visualisation and relating this to my own experiences where I have derived motivation from similar experiences.

2. My main source of sugar intake would be desserts and possibly the spreads I put on my toast. Currently I use nutella and apricot jam, but nutella has more than 50% sugar (which is insane!) and apricot jam is at about 30% sugar. Eating toast is almost habitual for me, so it will be difficult to move to less tasty alternatives.

3. Of course you may adopt my journal style! Whatever works for you and helps you on your journey. Most of it is derived from The Slight Edge principles though.

I hope this helps :)

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Hey Alex.

Just an idea, but one thing your reduced sugar intake goal can help you with is encouraging you to learn how to cook. I'm sure your parents currently handle most of that, but you may be able to help them in the future and try out some other recipes (lower in sugar). :)

Hi Cam, thanks for the idea. I have made dinners before, but I am rather slow at it and remember resenting it. I am sure I will be able to look at it in a more positive light now (it has been a long time since I have made family dinners), and as you mention would be great to keep sugar intake down.

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2. My main source of sugar intake would be desserts and possibly the spreads I put on my toast. Currently I use nutella and apricot jam, but nutella has more than 50% sugar (which is insane!) and apricot jam is at about 30% sugar. Eating toast is almost habitual for me, so it will be difficult to move to less tasty alternatives.

Use this as an opportunity to find alternatives. You could make your own almond butter or cashew butter for example. :)

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Attempt II Day 49

No complaining day 5

I used to get a little frustrated in writing in 'Attempt II' but kept writing it because I could not forget that I failed along the way. I realise at this point that this has been important for me to remember how I tripped up.

Today has been a sunny day, but not so sunny me. I had my morning meditation and finally remembered to visualise in the morning because of the note I wrote. I had high expectations for what visualisation would feel like, but I was not disappointed when I felt much motivated to do my morning run than I normally would. Perhaps just the act of sitting down and waiting raises awareness that time is precious and should be used to invest in oneself.

I just read something from re-reading a bit of the slight edge: "work expands to fill the time allowed to use for it". This is absolutely true because my most efficient work was when timing myself, and thus reducing the time taken to produce the same amount of work. So far these holidays my weeks have just flown by without me doing terribly much in my day. I believe this would be because I am doing everything at a very leisurely pace. Tomorrow I will write up a time plan like I have previously, and I will see how much better I use my time this way.

I practiced long distance action shooting (capturing fast moving activity from a distance) with my camera for an hour or so today and it was rather difficult, but was great for photography experience. I got some good pictures out of it though, I should look through these tomorrow to find the best ones.

I'll make this quick as I want to have more sleep:

3 Things I'm grateful for:

I am grateful for my camera.

I am grateful for the cat.

I am grateful for my shoes.

Again, I have taken the time to think about each of these things individually and have found it much more fulfilling than just explaining them with text.

What I will do differently tomorrow:

I will write a time plan to use my time more effectively. I will complete all daily habits (I started programming and guitar practice too late today :/). I will eat much less sugar!

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Attempt II Day 50

No complaining attempt II Day 1

Today kicked of not very well because I skipped running this morning (I felt a little sore and hadn't had an 'official' break from running in a while. What I know for sure is that I will be running tomorrow! In terms of activities completed I did rather well at keeping to the schedule I made. I was asked to be a sober driver for my mother this afternoon, so I was just hanging around in the car reading "Think and Get Rich" for the past few hours.

Today is a minor milestone in my 90 day detox, and I look forward to reaching 90 and continuing my journey beyond. I complained about my goggles having a leak in them today, so I need to start my no complaining counter again. It seems it will be a real challenge to not complain for 25 days!

So I haven't done my running or guitar practice today but got some good programming time in. I'm not disappointed with myself though, the job I was asked to do threw my schedule out the window.

I have attached some pictures of Spidey, the cat I mentioned yesterday. We called her Spidey because she likes to cling to people, and enjoys climbing people and trees. The photos I took last year and are some of my better ones. Sorry if this kills your interned, they are more than 4MB each.

3 Things I'm grateful for:

I am grateful for my scissors.

I am grateful that I haven't been drunk before (and I don't plan on it).

I am grateful for the paella I had for dinner.

One amazing thing that happened today:

Today at the polo club (where I drove my mother) they had delicious paella for everybody. This is a dish that I rarely have and really love, and have already noted on my trello 'to do' list to find a good recipe and write it down for near future use. Now that I am sugar-conscious, I appreciated that I could fill up on the somewhat healthy food.

What I could have done to make my day better:

I could have had my morning run, as that seems to set things in motion nicely. I could have gotten up faster, as with no pressure on me I tend to get up very slowly.

What I will do differently tomorrow:

I will get up immediately after my alarm goes off, and will meditate through my drowsiness. I will only use a 10 minute meditation to save myself time. I will make sure that I have everything prepared for my trip to the city tomorrow.

 

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Attempt II Day 51

No complaining attempt II Day 2

Today has been great fun, as I watch the new Star Wars movie with some school friends. I have been very sick during the night though, so I didn't do my morning run (I probably could have done meditation though).

I have started a plan to start my own business through Think and Get Rich; I know I can if one of my friends have! (Cam has and one of my old school friends set up his own business too). If I am to really carry through with this, this would be a big turning point in my life. I plan to produce personalised or mass produced (via 3D printing) consumer electronics that people would love, and have some other ideas which could lead to great success.

I haven't worked on my daily habits since I travelled so far today and have not been feeling well, but I applied for another bunch of jobs, which might pay itself off.

I have made a bit of improvement on reducing my sugar intake - I had coke zero instead of normal coke, had less snacks than I normally would have eaten in a cinema, had a vegetable burger for dinner, and had no sugary breakfast. I think I am getting better at this rather fast! But that's just my ego talking.

3 Things I'm grateful for:

I am grateful for the opportunity to spend time with my old school friends.

I am grateful for trains.

I am grateful for the pets we have here.

One amazing thing that happened today:

Today I tried a healthier option in terms of burgers. I would normally get one of the greasiest, meatiest burgers available because that was what my taste buds were craving. I felt like eating vegetables as something healthier, so I had a vegetable burger. It was just as tasty as the other burgers, and it felt tastier in a way because I was guilt-free when eating it. Such a simply pleasant moment like this I will look back to for motivation to eat healthier foods.

What I could have done to make today better:

I could have meditated upon waking up. I could have done more with my time in the morning. I could have eaten thin chips instead of fatty ones.

What I will do differently tomorrow:

I will do my morning meditation, visualise, then have a run. I will plan out my day to make the most of my time. I will eat even healthier foods.

 

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Here is my post for yesterday:

Attempt II Day 52

No Complaining Attempt II Day 1

Today has gone by very quickly, I started my day by getting ready to leave to go to my father's place, and a lot of waiting following that. I have done quite a bit of reading today, and although it is old, Think and Grow Rich has been one of my favourites so far! I had never understood faith in the depth that is described, and I now have concrete steps to take to develop faith in myself. I spent many hours scourging through the cupboard contents to throw out anything significantly past its 'best before' date, but found it somewhat fun to reorganise it all back into the cupboard in the most efficient way possible (whilst still being able to access and see everything).

I hadn't made any progress on my daily habits, but I was being paid to clean the house so I was still making good use of my time. I also complained today, the amount of attempts I make on this will soon become funny if I continue to fail! On a brighter note, I have made great progress in terms of eating healthier: I now don't eat dessert, don't have many unhealthy snacks, and made myself vegetables for dinner.

I will start making moves towards my business plan, as the best time would realistically be now since I have so much free time on my hands.

I haven't done any envisioning in the morning for a while, I need to make sure I do that tomorrow.

3 Things I'm grateful for:

I am grateful for having the ability to drive.

I am grateful for having cats at my place.

I am grateful for having vegetables to cook for myself.

One amazing thing that happened today:

Today when I was driving home from dropping my parents off, I used Waze and C3PO as the guide. He finds new ways to travel home which are interesting and can be a faster some of the time. This makes it as the most enjoyable part of the day because driving with C3PO as a guide makes it more fun and makes me feel as though my driving has more purpose, so I just enjoy it better.

What I could have done to make my day better:

I could have taken the time to envision myself as the person I want to be to help develop it as a daily practice and provide more motivation to do skill building activities.

What I will do differently tomorrow:

I will make sure to do visualising practice in the morning and when going to bed.

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Attempt II Day 53

No complaining Attempt IV Day 1

Today has been a straightforward day. I finished the chores around the house like potting our new plants and finishing cleaning out the pantry. I meditated this morning and did some envisioning. I didn't 'feel' it very much, but if I repeat the words that I wrote through Think and Grow Rich I should have much more to think about and hopefully be more successful in my envisioning.

I did my morning run, python programming, and started to do some HTML coding again so that I can start working on building the website for my client before the holidays end. I think what puts me off playing guitar is that I expect to put in the same amount of time into it as python, which is not proportionate. I will rearrange my schedule so I play guitar straight after getting ready for the day rather than slumping into my chair to do programming. Another thing that I believe might be putting me off guitar practice is that I am having to put in a lot more effort to learn and practice the new material, and not enjoying it so much. I know that I will be able to learn quicker and have more fun with practice, so I must have faith in myself.

I realise that my journal writing has been leaning towards just recounting what I have done during the day, rather than what it used to be: a self evaluation. I will make sure to continue assessing how I have spent my day rather than recounting it.

What I will do differently tomorrow:

  • I will write a journal that is purely self evaluation of what I have done and how I have done during the day.
  • I will play guitar immediately after getting ready for the day. 
  • I will envision myself during meditation tomorrow so that I am not only clearing the mind, but directing it towards what I intend to do with my time in the near future.
  • I will make a start on my business plan, through use of trello to get this and other tasks done.
  • I will spend at least 30 minutes learning to code in HTML and JQuery

What I could have done to make today better:

I could have done what I mentioned above.

One amazing thing that happened today:

Once I finished cleaning out the cupboard today I couldn't help but be amazed by the uniformity from which I laid everything out, now we have almost 1/2 of the cupboard empty with such space! Besides that, it was nice to finish a programming problem (a problem described on a sheet to write up and finish) today as I failed to yesterday with a much larger time frame.

3 Things I'm grateful for:

I am grateful for the hot dog dinner I had tonight.

I am grateful that my family here supports my diet choice

I am grateful that Rubi the dog is always here to keep me company during the day.

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Here is my post for yesterday:

Attempt II Day 54

Today has been full of Christmas decorating and preparing for the extended family to come over.

I fared somewhat well in terms of my habit building: I played guitar for a good half an hour or so, I spend quite a bit of time programming in python, and had a morning run. I didn't meditate for very long but did spend some time envisioning.

A Merry Christmas to all! I am rather busy at the moment so I'll end my post here.

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Here is my post for yesterday:

Attempt II Day 55

No complaining Attempt IV Day 3

Today has been a wonderful Christmas day with both of my family sets. I was generous with my gifts to others and they were appreciated well. I experienced some gaming nostalgia because Christmas would often be a time where I would have new games to play and be very excited about these games. I was very grateful for the gifts I received as well, many of them were thoughtful to what I enjoy, and was thankful that none of these gifts included video games or video game related things.

I didn't do my daily habits, it was Christmas after all. I had a great day though, and took the time to envision before sleeping (albeit not for very long). I attempted to connect with my cousins a little, but I suppose I could have done more to break the awkwardness. Overall I think I did decent today, but it was a special occasion so I can't be too demanding of myself.

Thanks to the Game Quitters for the Christmas wishes!

3 Things I'm grateful for:

I am grateful for the wonderful gifts I was given.

I am grateful that I now have better opportunities to pursue my self development habits and skills.

I am grateful for the time that I had to spend with my extended family.

One amazing thing that happened today:

Filming a video with my cousins was a great bonding time.

What I could have done to make today better:

I could have started off the day with a run.

What I will do differently tomorrow:

I can't answer that question as I am writing this the day after!

Edited by AlexTheGrape
Wrong day count number.
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Attempt II Day 56

Having gone so far through the detox has now been instrumental in ensuring that I don't play games again; I don't want to waste the time I've spent on improving my life!

Today has been a better day than yesterday in terms of habit development as I have had a run (afternoon) but I am otherwise spending a lot of time thinking. I have had major nostalgia and game cravings today as my twin brother has purchased an XBOX One. Strangely enough all it did was give me urges to play my favourite PC strategy game, and I have been thinking about the good times I have had playing those games. I know that I cut out from my memory all of the frustration, loneliness, and time consuming that these games bring, and so have tried to shift my attention to the image of me sitting on a chair for an entire day. I think these cravings may be influenced because I haven't been very social with people other than family for the past week or so, and so gaming isn't far off in terms of isolation.

I will have my own bank card working soon and I will buy the 30 day challenge to keep me occupied as soon as I can.

3 things I'm grateful for:

I am grateful for being able to choose what to have for my own dinner.

I am grateful for the beautiful sunset I saw this afternoon.

I am grateful for the opportunity to shop on boxing day.

One amazing thing that happened today:

I went for a run this afternoon because I hadn't gotten any exercise and was feeling confused in terms of games. It helped to get my mind back on track momentarily.

What I could have done today to make my day better:

I should have started my day with my daily routine that included meditation and visualisation, but I woke up 'too late' for that. Tomorrow I won't let myself give any excuses unless something is urgent.

What I will do differently tomorrow:

I will make sure to have a morning run, meditate, play guitar, program, and start working on my business plan.

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Today I had decided to play an hour of Halo on my brother's new console. It wasn't very fun, and nowhere near as fun as I remember it being. I also played some online Risk against some AI, but I could do essentially the same thing with people, just more socially. I have yet to decide what I am going to do: to continue (or restart) my detox, to have a 'last hoorah' to finish off my life as a gamer whilst finishing the things I've wanted to for a while, or to just set limits on the amount of games I play. I will decide in due course.

I need to be honest here, I did request to have my steam account back from Steam Support since I locked myself out of it. There is only one or two games that I am keen on playing, so perhaps that may limit the time I spend playing in the long run. I don't have access to the account yet, but when I do I expect to jump straight onto it.

I will make sure to do whichever choice I make whilst staying as an active member of the community. I don't want to be one of those users that is overly energetic whilst they are going well and then disappear from the forums when they presumably 'quit quitting'. One of the main reasons that backs up my thoughts towards gaming as OK is that I was never truly addicted. This is true in a sense that I hardly ever played video games during the school term, and left it for the holidays as a reward. I know that I will have next to no self control whilst playing the games I like the most, so that itself could define a gaming addiction. I may have gaming compulsion as it is defined as "an irresistible urge to behave in a certain way" but may be addicted as I depend on games during the holidays for a sense of purpose and fulfilment: "physically and mentally dependent on a particular substance".

Today I had a very good run in the morning, implementing the 10-20-30 technique to make the most out of my run with progressive overload. It was very refreshing to jump in the pool once I had finished. I also worked on my guitar playing skills until I was sick of it! I didn't do programming today which is a bummer. I took the time to set up Risk the board game to play with any of my family but nobody did which was why I ended up playing it online against the computer. I took the time to envision and meditate this morning which was refreshing and was a reason why I managed to get in my morning run.

Tomorrow I plan to register my bank card, purchase the 30 day challenge, and perhaps go to the library or some other place to meet new people.

3 Things I'm grateful for:

I am grateful for the community being here to support those who need help.

I am grateful that Cam, Tom, Joe, Travis and SpiNips has supported me throughout my journey and continue to do so. I am thankful for all the time you have spent generously.

I am thankful for the clean water I can always drink.

One amazing thing that happened today:

I had a water balloon fight with my brothers and played in the pool with them immediately afterwards. This was wonderful because my twin brother hardly spends any time outside with us and so was a moment to be cherished. From me not gaming at all the past two months, my little brother and I have been spending more time together outside as we have been pushed to find new ways of playing together.

What I could have done to make my day better:

I could have been bolder and gone on an adventure out of the house when I had nothing to do so that I would have the chance to make new friends and improve my mental health.

What I will do differently tomorrow:

I will make sure to go to town and spend a significant amount of time there, and make at least one new friend. I will make sure to have finished all daily habits I have set for myself before playing any games or lying down on my bed to do anything.

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