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Larry's Detox Journal


Somebodyelse

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DAY 4

 

I will try to update this journal at least once a week if not more.  

I'm currently on day 4 now. My main goals is to stay away from playing videogames and away from unnecessary browsing / learning information about video games. So watching interviews reading articles going on forums and learn stuff about video games that don't really concern me anymore because before I would just paid in those things and win sometimes even those particular games I was viewing I had no interest in biology the opinion of people had on those specific games.

Goals (ranked in order from top to bottom from most important to least)

- Improve my relationship with God and be more open about my faith in public. (I can talk about it when someone it brings it uup, but I don't really start the conversation)

- Pass my last semester of school

- Learn how to cook well

- Prope understand how to clean around my house either by mopping, washing my clothes and ironing them too (I'm pretty sure I rely on my sister & mom to much on this)

- Earn a job in my sound Design field (Currently work at Walmart)

- Get girlfriend 

Thank you for reading this and have a blessed day! :D

 

 

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Hi nice that you share your journal here,

stating your goals is a good starting point. I think with goalsetting language matters. In my opinion you could start thinking of the person you wanna be, to get all those things instead of just state the points you wanna achieve. For example instead of get a girlfriend you could state: I wanna be a men who girls are attracted to. Or instead of earn a job the sound Design field, i want to be a Sounddesigner. This way of formulating your goals makes it easier to visualize them in your head, what will motivate you at pursuing your goals. Addionally it enables you to fokus on the things you can change(yourself) instead  fokussing on stuff you can't influence( i.e. mean teacher).

To reach your goals  would advice you to start with little challenges for yourself in the fields you want to improve. Maybe talk with a friend about god, Or learn something about improving your social skills. Look after job opportunitys in the internet for 30min, work on your Curriculae. Well stuff like this. Set a date  for them too so its harder to postpone your quests.  An example of  a "good" goal would be:

goal:

-I want to be a selfsufficant man who is awesome at cooking.

shortterm goal:

- ask my mom to show me how she does my favorite meals and learn to do them myself (unitl 3.3.2016)

I would write this goals somewhere you can see tehm. I have my goals on a .txt-file on my desktop and watch theme veryday. Other possibiltys would be a whiteboard or on a post-it you pin somewhere you can see it every day.

Ah and before i forget here is an awesome studytactic wich help me to fokus ("ultimate productivity method"). Check it out if you want.

ok sry for all that input, but im happy to share some of the things wich worked for me in the last weeks. Feel free to ignore what you don't like ;)

greetings Mario

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Day 11

So far so good on staying away from watching gameplay videos and looking up not important  information.  I did read a brief article about one of the game new sites I used to visit is shutting down and I was trying to listen to a mini sermon while a guy plays minecraft while giving it.  I forgot that he plays that game while talking. Since the topic they were discussing wasn't interesting to me and closed the video.  Still sticking to dedicating only two hours per week for entertainment type of videos. So I watched about six episodes of an anime this week.  Also I finished reading "Misreading Scripture with Western Eyes: Removing Cultural Blinders to Better Understand the Bible".  Really good book and has helped me more self aware of depending on the culture certain things of the bible can be overlooked or made less important. Like how time is viewed in the bible and how Jesus dealt with people by a honor & shame culture viewpoint.  Now I'm reading "The heart of John Wesley's journal selected  edited by Percy Livingston Parker".

   With completing this detox I hope to have a clearer mindset and video games having less control over my thought life, actions, resources/money, and time. With all that said I'm also trying to implement finish backlog of books before purchasing new ones and less spending money on going out to eat. School & work still take up most of my time.

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Hey Larry,

 I'm reading the Book "Failing Forward" at the moment. It's written by a pastor and is pretty insightfull on the suspect of the fear of failure. Maybe the points wich annoy me( because i'm not into god at all) could make it even more worthwhile for you. 11days is a nice accomplishment. Keep going!

 

Thank you I'll check into the book.

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Day 19

Well so far so good. Doing all right staying away from games by not playing or consuming game media/info/forums. One thing I noticed though is for some reason in my youtube feed and other things  when I search the internet video game themed ads or videos appear when I'm not even trying to look for them and are suggested to me. Pretty suspicious.

 

    School is going ok for now and seems pretty stable just got to make sure I have to work on homework and go over material that is presented to me in class. With my spiritual life it seems I'm growing and God is giving me more opportunities for me to talk about him or I putting myself out there too. I'm thinking of seeing this anime movie next month and trying to share the gospel there in some way.

 

Family relationships are healthy and I'm trying to eat more vegetables. With romantic stuff not really pursuing that right now. That's all for now *signs off...*

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Day 25 (No Fap Day 2)

This week is going okay. Besides me falling into sin (lust/masturbation) on  Monday. I think it happened because I was bored and I know didn't try hard enough to stop myself when there was more steps to stop myself that could be taken that were available to me.

   So I'm committing to a no fap now. Currently on day 2. 

 

   With staying away from videogames I stayed away from playing and watching any videos. I did scheme the first paragraph of an article though, but decided I didn't want to waste time reading the entire thing.

 

   With school I have two exams coming up in the next two weeks. That I need to study for so I can not be so worried about taking them. So I decided to return this Viking history lecture series DVDs back to the library so I can be more focused to study for the exams.

 

   Another decision I decided to implement is to no longer read any books besides my bible unless it's a gift or has to be read  to learn for a job/certain skill. There has been some people God has used like George Muller and Smith Wigglesworth that made a similar decision.  Also the founder of the Salvation Army made important point that he wished that he read the Bible more even though he read a lot since he was an evangelist/Preacher. Whatever a person gives up for God he will give back in interest, but Sometimes it's in ways a person doesn't expect. I feel like that's what God is leading me to do.

 

Here's a quote from Jesus I feel relates  to the decision I want to commit to and going to take his word for it.

(For some reason it copied the red font as wel where I got the quote from)

“Truly I tell you,” Jesus replied, “no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age: homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields—along with persecutions—and in the age to comeeternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.”

 I really enjoy these journal  enetries/posts and might post more during the week. I try to write in my physical journal each day I have and I feel both journals are helping me express my thoughts better.

 

:D

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If you want to start easier you could make a habbit out of beable reading. Something like at the start/end of the day 30min reading in the bible. And you could use the rest of the day at thinking about the stuff you read. Can't understand really why it should be only the bible though. I would prioritize on the bible if it is important for you and read other stuff if i have time and want to. More to learn can't be bad or can it?

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Day 32 (No Fap Day 9)

This week is going by pretty well. I was hanging around some friends from school on campus in the lunch area.  I saw about two to five seconds of Minecraft gameplay didn't play any because I didn't want to play and my friend was playing that game on his laptop.  With staying away from video games and not spending lots of time looking up video game information such articles, forum posts, and other media types I've noticed with my mind it's easier to focus on subjects when I need to focus on something.  The main thing that still need to improve on is studying habits.  When I used to game a lot I would mostly never study and now I guess don't know how to get into the habit of studying? :S  Maybe because it's work and part of me finds it boring, but it needs to get started or else nothing will get accomplished.

 

   My bible is going well. I plan to start reading the bible from shortest book to longest book in that order.

   With pursing love interest I"m not really feeling it.  Would be nice, but I'm sure that's way back in the priorities of things to do right now.  Trying to improve talking with people I don't know.  Right now I attend this BSM (Baptist Student Ministry) event on campus each week.  Helps me share my faith and build talking up with people I don't know skills.  Would eventually like to not have to attend an event to try to start a conversation about my faith and other topics.   I think this not trying to reach out to people I don't know and being somewhat afraid/shy about is just all in my head.  Needs to get  overcome hopefully this year because I have a goal I want to achieve this year that relates to talking with people. 9_9

 

Another thing I'm trying to implement is not being big headed/cruise mode with pride, videogames & masturbation urges.  If I have that mindset it will make it much easier to mess up and fall.

I liked this small passage about being humble and the funny thing is part of it has a verse I was looking for a couple weeks back that I couldn't find.

 

   "The highway of the upright avoids evil;
    those who guard their ways preserve their lives.

 Pride goes before destruction,
    a haughty spirit before a fall.

Better to be lowly in spirit along with the oppressed
    than to share plunder with the proud."

 

Edit: Hope everyone's game detox is going well and God bless you! :)

Edited by Somebodyelse
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If you want to start easier you could make a habbit out of beable reading. Something like at the start/end of the day 30min reading in the bible. And you could use the rest of the day at thinking about the stuff you read. Can't understand really why it should be only the bible though. I would prioritize on the bible if it is important for you and read other stuff if i have time and want to. More to learn can't be bad or can it?

I try to read at least two chapters a day.  I will still read other books, but only ones that relate skills I want to learn now or in the future.  Just right now I feel God wants me to focus on the bible, instead of the other Christian/bible related books I own.

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Day 40 (No Fap Day 16)

Going to keep this journal short because I want to study for a test I have tomorrow. On Monday I didn't feel good probable because I went to bed late and was worried about my future of what to do next.  So I didn't go to my only class that day and instead I read a couple Christians related documents I received in the mail, but never got to around reading.  After that I rewatched a mini film about St. Augustine and enjoyed it very much.

    Now before all this took place during the weekend I was listening to some music from a new christian rap artist I found named "PyRexx".  Since I was listening to some of the music through Amazon's music cloud service it also played some video game music I bought in the past. I think that music triggered a want to play videogames or at least watch videos about them. So I almost gave into watching a video game trailer about a video game I was interested in that played as an ad on YouTube.  I thought to myself "Maybe if I let it play in the background and just listen to it I'll be okay?". Yet I felt that wasn't the right thing to do for myself and the detox.  So I skipped the ad/trailer and watched the video I actually wanted to watch.

   The only thing I'm worried about really is this linguistics test tomorrow.  So I got to go.  Hope everyone is having a blessed day today! :) <3

 

Bonus:  I liked this proverb from the bible that I can put into practice my life more by not jumping to conclusions a lot of the time and instead ask more questions about situations.

"If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame."

 

P.S.  Looks like I didn't keep this journal short. xD

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Day 47 (No Fap 23)

This is going okay had some struggles/temptations  with video games & porn.  A thought kept poping up in my head that I should buy a Nintendo 3ds and watch the new Nintendo direct, but I didn't give in. I did read a couple video game articles though.  This happened on the half way point of the detox day 45.  Also with porn urges came, but didn't give in and start searching for stuff I shouldn't be looking into.

 Today I plan on going to the library to check out books that relate to learning Spanish.  I feel I should pick up learning Spanish as a skill God want me to learn and also because my whole family speaks Spanish, but since I had trouble talking when I was younger I had to focus on speaking English.

  Yesterday I went to the movies, but didn't talk to anyone about Christ and just a couple small conversations with the staff that worked there about the origins of the theater.

Couple last points I wanted to make were I finally made a video I felt God wanted me to make, but never did because I was being lazy about giving away blessings(s) we may have or receive in the future to others and importance of prayer.  I heard this phrase while watching a video that relates to what @Cam Adair has been saying about replacing our habits such as video games with good ones.

"To overcome a desire you need a stronger desire"

Edited by Somebodyelse
Wanted to add a bold graphic on a phrase.
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  • 2 weeks later...

Day 55 (No Fap 31)

School ends next month in April so I need to start working on research papers and final projects.  

  My week has been okay watched two documentary about John Wesley  and Robert Jermain Thomas.  Both were very entertaining and the main things I learned from them is just go out and do it (do stuff) for God.  The second thing is as long you are doing stuff for God  like evangelism you don't need miracles for God to reach  people. 

  Another thing I learned about God from a video was God loves any person I love more than I ever can because his love is on such a higher level and that love applies back to me.  This was put into practice when  I noticed during the John Wesley documentary I watched wxplained how a gang and the gang leader that were sent to kill John Wesley by a greedy mine owner, since Wesley's evangelism was taking away workers because they wanted to follow Christ, but instead of the gang & gang leader killing him they were converted by Christ's love and how much value he has for them as they were trying to kill Wesley.

 

Hope everyone has a blessed week.

 

 

Edit: Forgot to add this statement because I'm trying to be honest.  Watched a guy talk about video games I used to watch on YouTube.  Didn't watch the whole video that had gameplay because it was boring, the guy was expressing mostly anger, wanted to see what he was up/how he was doing, and just watching it to waste time.  Then another video with no gameplay, but the same person giving their option about topics relating to video games.  Besides that didn't watch any other video game gameplay and didn't have a desire to by a games or game consoles like had in the past recently.

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Even if can't understand  your devotion to religion and god at all, it is awesome that you found a way and something you love. Honesty is so important. Honesty to others and yourself. Real change can just happen if you be absolutly honest about the things you want and feel. Keep going. It seems like you found a way how to fill your life with purpose and I am happy for you!

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  • 2 weeks later...

Day 65 (No Fap 41)

Just wanted to say this detox is going well.  I even forgot a character from a video game I used to play made a crossover in another video game I used to play.  (I'm being vague as possible  to not be a stumbling block so people  don't  go look more into the information)  My mind is continuing to get much more clearer as I get closer to the completion of this detox and helps out a lot with focusing my thinking towards other things.

  This week I plan on going to the writing center to get help making a thesis statement for my linguistic research paper.  Going to share some verses I really enjoyed last week God lead me to.

(Bolding the parts that caught my attention from these verses listed below)

" The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.” "

" Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law. "

"The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing, But the soul of the diligent is made fat.
 
 
Besides all that above going to try harder with God's help to be more obedient with my mother and also not grumble when she asks me to do something.  Since she's only human and no one is perfect besides Jesus when he was earth.  I need to get rid of the high expectations I point on her wither that be consciously or subconsciously.  Also apply the same to anyone else I know and will meet.
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  • 2 weeks later...

Day 75 (No Fap Day 51)

Been busy these past two weeks next weekI have a programing project due and research paper. I plan to finish the programing project today. Also I need to finish two book before next week so I can use them as sources in my paper.

 

    Been doing okay with being consistent with spending time with God in the morning even if it's not the same amount of time each time by God's grace. Also making some progress with talking to people I don't know. That way I can be more comfortable with talking to anyone and be able to share the gospel without being nervous.

Finally with videogames I did watch some gameplay because the guy on YouTube was explaining how people made music in the 16 bit era and I listened to two songs from a video game I used to play. Besides that I stayed away from videogame news videos and interviews. For some reason though a couple days last week and yesterday I had dreams that dealt with videogames, but didn't involve me playing any. Maybe it's my brain trying to have last hooray about me playing videogames obsessively?  :S

 

One final thing is I thought this quote  was Interesting when I looked into a certain statement from a video about God creating  a new heaven a new earth.

 

"See, I will create new heavens and a new earth. The former things will not be remembered, nor will they come to mind. " 

Hope everyone is having a blessed day! :)

(For some reason the bold wouldn't go away on some of my words)

Edited by Somebodyelse
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