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Koolman

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About Koolman

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  1. Koolman added a post in a topic Koolman's journal   

    I was going to play video games yesterday but then I remembered this forum and the commitment I made. I decided to wait and now I don't feel the need to play as much. Most video games are about killing anyways which gets boring. 
    I have made a YouTube channel and have been getting involved with it. It has brought a lot of passion into my life. I want to improve myself in other ways too. 
    So I am still on my streak which at this point is 7 months. It's a good thing I uninstalled my games before setting off on this journey otherwise I would have broke this streak. My highest streak since I was a kid(maybe 7 years old) without games is 9 months. I don't think that has a healthy influence on the brain maybe. Just my opinion.
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  2. Koolman added a post in a topic Koolman's journal   

    I wrote a poem here about why I want to quit
    everytime i gamed I wasted time in the real world 
    everytime i gamed I would rush my life 
    everytime i gamed I would try to do my chores and things fast
    never really took the time to look at my past
    always rushing everything like my games wouldn't last
    those stupid games made me lose potential which was vast
    my family and friends didn't see much of me
    i would rush all the time that could of been quality 
    from my dear loved ones and my dear family
    i would quickly eat  my food  then play call of duty
    then I slowly realized this is not what I want to be
    i have to do better for me
    this stuff hurts your eyes it doesn't help you see
    see im wasting your time not reaching my aims
    i don't want to go to gamestop and buy games
    wasting my time and forgetting all the people's names. 
    Wanting to play games so I'm  rushing my Son James
    this is lame!
    i could be doing something else and reaching fame.
    investing in talent or maybe quality time
    with my family and friends or making this rhyme 
    working harder at work turning my nickle into a dime
    maybe I'm lonely I'm a lonely lemon maybe I should find a lime
    but wasting all this time is a crime.
    it hurts my brain  my whole system is affected
    im sitting down and my body is being neglected
    its no wonder I get rejected 
    thats why I need to quit this with some time invested 
    don't tell me it's just hobby! You just need some control 
    no it isn't cause I want to reach my potential 
    i have to quit and go through the struggle 
    its hard but it's how people before me lived
    they didn't have video games like I did
    they struggled and workedand did great things
    thats why when I play those games  my heart stings
    cause I'm not living the way they used to like kings
    reaching their goals and flying with wings
    this is what I always wanted
    Now that I know about game quitters i think I got it
    It helped me see I'm not alone and I can get guidance 
    i don't have to be by myself and do pure self reliance 
    no more not being with people and living in silence
    living In pure isolation and no real human connection
    laughing over the mic and they won't even mention
    that they are wasting time and not paying attention
    to all the other creative things they could be doing 
    with their time and and that they can be moving
    helping each other reach their goals
    making real connections and not empty holes
    holes of sitting and doing nothing cause none of its real
    no real things being done what's the big deal?
    they can go out somewhere and go have a meal
    at least here they can talk and see each other's zeal
    socialize and realize and see how they feel
    they might say though what's the big deal?
    its just a few hours of our life?
    nobody's gonna steal 
    the problem is you could have a wife
    a family and why fill it with strife
    wasting time like cutting it with a knife.
    but your right it's your life but the best for you is to live
    live in reality and give!
    there is so much you could do and help out with too 
    find some people to serve something good to do
    if your lucky it will help you grow some nerve 
    you can turn around now and make that curve
    thats what I'm going to do and live differently now
    you don't think it can be done I'll show you how!
    so today I change 
    my life I rearrange 
    I'll  try this again I won't stay trapped in a cage 
    inside is filled with rage 
    but I'll fix that it's time to engage
    i want to finally be a real man I'm  at that age. 
    So I want to thank cam for inspiring this stage
    if it wasn't for his work  I would be stuck in games being a mage 
    In some dumb game maybe a sage
    but I'm not I have been inspired 
    thanks cam don't you dare retire!
    there is passion in this there is fire
    there is a lot of potential in this and the need is dire
    and now Change is what I desire
    lets start now and make our future brighter.
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
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  3. Koolman added a post in a topic Koolman's journal   

    Thanks I decided to sell it the only issue is the issue I had at the beginning what do I do now i mean I am way passed 90 days like 140 something idk. But I'm not sure of what to do I don't have myself together I mean I have some purpose that religion gives me but still MAAN I feel like I can't even do that right or properly. I am trying to pull myself together and become a better man but i don't know. It feels like I will be the way I was before games the mayor of losersville, depressed, wanting something to do but with gaming gone nothing to do. 
    I relapsed to YouTube couldn't go 90 days without it went like 70 something maybe less maybe more. Social media as well relapsed there. I am a mess probably the worst mess out there. I still have the urge to play games I just distract myself with internet use that's all. 
    Wish everyone well. Hopefully I get better. I am at least happy that this time when I quit games I have GAME QUITTERS something I didn't have before. Which is awesome. I can write out how I feel if I feel like getting into games again etc.. honestly though this time I feel like quitting permanently. Like I haven't gone a year without gaming since I was I don't know maybe 5 probably a bit before that. Even when I did quit I never really had the intention I think to never play again. It was always for a short period of time the longest of which was like 9 months or a bit more. I always wanted to live in a similar fashion as I did then as a kid with my innocence and strength. Maybe this year I can go the whole year without it the 1st time in a LONG TIME. The issue is finding purpose in living again which will be kind of hard but I guess I can do that and it is definitely worth a try.
     
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  4. Koolman added a post in a topic Koolman's journal   

    Day 84
    So there has been temptation to play I literally have steam installed and am journaling this on a gaming PC( wow talk about walking on a tight wire) but I don't want to go back until at least 90 days I am 6 days away. I also have been almost 2 months without youtube. YouTube watching was a big bad habit for me that was hard to brake. I'm glad though that I have gone this long without it. I don't think I want to sell my gaming PC cause This is not the first time I quit games then came back. If I come back I don't want to have to buy a whole other system I will already have one. Plus I think its a waste to just delete steam and sell my Pc that was 1000 dollars. Maybe I will change my mind on this.
    Anyways I want to get the stuff I have to do done and I want to be a better person and hopefully improve myself bit by bit with all of this.
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  5. Koolman added a topic in Daily Journals   

    Koolman's journal
    Hey guys I want to do a journal for this process I think its important to keep track of how I feel about gaming in general. A bit about myself I am the type of guy who has quit gaming then came back then quit again then came back then now quit again. I feel a little trapped(I know that sounds desperate but my situation is less desperate then it sounds trust me)
    As of today I am 73 days no gaming and still going by the way I am typing all of this on a gaming PC with steam installed(Ya I am literally staring into the eyes of the beast and saying IS THAT ALL YOU GOT!!) My games are still there I only uninstalled them but if I really wanted to I could download them again and play. I am afraid to sell this PC or get rid of it because like I said I have quit then come back then quit again. What if I want to come back and I got rid of my very expensive gaming PC this thing cost $1000 not a lot of people would tell me that its a smart idea to sell the thing. SO I am stuck at an impasse. What if I still want gaming later? or what if there is this new totally awesome super game? I Don't Know I am scared to be honest. But Like Cam says wait 90 days then decide if you still want gaming I am not 90 days yet so whatever I just have to wait and see.
     
    Why do I want to quit well:/
    I had a big problem with gaming. I would play till almost 2 maybe even 3 a.m starting from the morning at maybe 10:00 a.m maybe earlier. I would be motivated to wake up earlier for what well not work but for more time to game. I imagine my parents were disgustingly disappointed in me and I hated to disappoint them especially since they saw me quit then come back a few times as well. I literally sold my Xbox one a few months before I bought a gaming PC before that I had other quit then come back history Its like I just cant be consistent even if I go 90 days so as you can understand I don't really want to sell this just in case that happens again. TO be fair I didn't know about GAME QUITTERS back then I don't think it was around so that's something new I have this time but I don't know if that will be it.
    I remember just laying down on the floor being suicidal depressed probably(I was depressed that's for sure) I had quit gaming hadn't played in a while but finally I couldn't take it and downloaded steam again after almost a year of having it deleted.
    1.SO I think I want a more controlled and organized life at least. If gaming is going to be there it cant get in the way of my obligations and other things.
    2. Dopamine resensitivity: Well based on some of the science I heard about gaming can jack up dopamine levels in an unnatural way for doing nothing pretty much. This is not good because if dopamine levels are raised too high and stay that high for a long amount of time then that can mess up our sensitivity to dopamine. Basically Imagine if there was this bad smell in your house that you got used to. A normal person would notice the smell cause they aren't used to it but you cant cause you have been constantly exposed to that strong small for a long amount of time Hence your sensitivity to that smell has been lost.
    So with dopamine because we are used too a constantly long dopamine hit through gaming our brains cant really sense other smaller versions of dopamine like looking at flowers and a nice sunset as someone who doesn't have their dopamine levels jacked up as a video game or even worse porn addict would. Having dopamine levels be at a good natural pace like past generations did would be a lot healthier and would also make living a normal life a lot more enjoyable.
    http://yourbrainonporn.com/list-internet-video-game-brain-studies
    the above link a source to some scientific studies on gaming's affects on the brain.
    Those are my two reasons I may expand more soon but this is good enough for me as of right now.  
       
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  6. Koolman added a post in a topic Game Quitters Memes   

    it should have a controller on it in the last picture with a video game console not a computer but kind of makes sense especially with internet addiction.
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  7. Koolman added a post in a topic I relapsed after around 4 months.   

    First of all bro you went 4 months and relapsed one The glass isn't have full the glass is 90% full you did a great a job dude, amazing progress just get right back up.
     
    Cam how can someone delete their steam account I spent a ton of money on it and there is also the fear that I could always go back this isn't the first time I have quit gaming then went right back I quit for months at a time then went right back and binged so can you give me advise I'm afraid and I don't think I want to delete it.
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  8. Koolman added a post in a topic Future Success Story   

    You can do it man good job in choosing to live real life as much as possible as best as you can.
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  9. Koolman added a post in a topic Science behind Game Addiction   

    Really post them I would like to see more on this. The more reason for people to quit this the better.
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  10. Koolman added a topic in Main Room   

    Science behind Game Addiction
    http://yourbrainonporn.com/list-internet-video-game-brain-studies
    For anyone who needs scientific sources to back up video game addiction the above link contains scientific research behind video game and internet addiction. This is good to look at if you want to understand the science behind video game addiction. I haven't really read much yet but I plan too to look in to the science behind this stuff. Hope you enjoy guys especially you CAM.
    Scroll down to the second section that's where all the scientific studies on this stuff will be located.
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  11. Koolman added a post in a topic Cam's YouTube Videos   

    Cam can I upload your videos to Vimeo. What I do is I download the video and then upload them through my various Vimeo accounts. Let me know if that's ok if not can you do so I block YouTube cause of sexual content I seek to block although vimeo has a bit of that my filter allows me to access vimeo videos outside the website. SO I was thinking upload the videos there then post them for viewing on this site. I would be more than happy to do that or link them to yourbrainrebalanced.com or nofap.com and on there I would upload your videos. Those websites allow vimeo or youtube videos to be uploaded there.If you allow me?
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  12. Koolman added a topic in Main Room   

    Black Friday Game Deals
    Hi Guys I'm new to the forum I have quit gaming then gone back then quit a little went back again quit for almost 6 months went back again during the summer of sophomore year and whent on to junior year in high school. Finally quit again Senior year. Then went back during my summer break of senior year and started freshman college with an insane gaming addiction I would play the entire day up to 1, 2 at times almost 3 maybe A.M in the middle of night. I knew this was bad. Later on while I was trying to fix my problems I found CAM and he has given awesome advice I have been off gaming since October 3rd or 4th (not sure its one of those for sure I'm assuming the bigger number) so that's 54 days no gaming. I want to be free from gaming for the rest of my life.
     
    The issue I have guys is the black Friday sales and all the video game marketing its like there is always something better which is kind of tempting I remember going to target and passing by the video game isle Its just I miss the feeling of getting a good deal on games and buying video game stuff How do you guys deal with the whole issue of there is always something new and better.
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