modelcars87

going to dc this coming weekend

just wanted to introduce myself.. name is chris, 28 years old. used to obsessively play video games (and other things, like alcohol, binge eating, exercising) to deal with my anxiety issues. spent the majority of my teenage years in front of the computer playing world of warcraft, all the shooters till 5am. slept a lot too, over 12 hours some days. after high school I was 300 pounds. I ate all the time to deal with my anxiety issues. I ate a lot of fast food and all sorts of stuff. few years after started dealing with my anxieties with weight loss (started eating 600 calories per day, exercising excessively). dropped down to 160. still thought I looked fat at the weight (wasn't at all). eventually just narrowed out, stopped the extreme dieting, got into a healthy diet routine stayingwhere I'm at now for years (188). eating healthy, etc. stopped binge eating all together really. really just want to feel safe. one of your videos ask that (how we want to feel). want that more than anything right now. want to be able to come home and feel safe. some of my anxieties include fear of confrontation, unknown, what other people think. others include saying no to others (struggle to say no to others). seems like I have a more generalized anxiety (with me all day long, nothing in specific). some things I am learning. for example, just cause you have one day you overeat does not mean you're going to gain our weight back. from what I've read, you don't need to be perfect at life either, meaning the same thing in real life - one bad day isn't going to screw everything up. seems like I really gotta change my thoughts around. trying to get into the routine now to overcome my fears, cause I messed a lot of stuff in the past. when I get in these situations now, trying to do what's right. not care what others think, say no when needed, being okay with uncertainty. those types of things..really do cause I messed up so much in life cause of my anxiety issues. relationships, dates, all sorts of things. just want to figure out what I really want to do with my life to be honest..