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destoroyah

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    214
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    Germany

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About destoroyah

  • Rank
    Veteran
  • Birthday 11/21/1986

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destoroyah's Activity

  1. destoroyah added a post in a topic Fidget toys   

    uh I meant Rubiks cube with "I cube".
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  2. destoroyah added a post in a topic Fidget toys   

    I cube, shuffle cards, pick locks, do tricks on a yoyo. But just a spinner? Do something that at least has some mastery.
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  3. destoroyah added a post in a topic Übermensch   

    Oh no another loop...
    Good luck! 
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  4. destoroyah added a post in a topic Lacking the knowledge on a wide range of topics   

    I only know random shit, it's also depressing.
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  5. destoroyah added a post in a topic Destoroyah's Meltdown   

    ENTRY #46:
    Still alive. I finally got thru work phase, now I only need to accomplish what a single person can accomplish and it feels like a vacation.
    I've gone back to gaming, due to the stress I've had, it really took me down. I'm recovering now, and my priority isn't to stop gaming, but to not fall over.
    I've kept up my training though, albeit all that shit, and I've improved on many levels. Haven't felt like drawing though.
    Guess it is hypocritical to keep posting as a gamer, that's why I haven't posted for a while, and because of the shit I was writing – it felt as if writing about my mind actually amplified negative thoughts, so I'll keep it short and simple in order to reset myself. I guess it is necessary and I should see my limits.
    I'll be back. I intend to quit gaming someday again, but currently I need to set other priorities – and it hasn't made a huge impact, I feel okay with it currently, sticking to NES games and Puzzle genre, though I just ordered a Switch.
    Heh. Pretty stupid, but looking forward to playing it, despite everything. I guess when I catch myself procrastinating – I might wake up again. But I haven't so far.
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  6. destoroyah added a post in a topic Destoroyah's Meltdown   

    @WorkInProgress I reacted oversensitive. I am under a lot of pressure currently and that has made me stingy. If I made you feel bad, I apologize for that.
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  7. destoroyah added a post in a topic The Warrior's Infinite Opus   

    So I have noticed, it is a responsibility I am not worthy of. You are mimicking a vision that you have created. I'm not as great as you imagine. People need idols and scapegoats sometimes, fathers, mothers. Create ghosts, spirits, totems and illusions. Carrots on a stick, once you reach 'em you realize that carrots taste like shit, but they keep you moving. Coping with changes. It's a motor to keep you running. It works for a while, until you can generate energy by yourself. Take me. Take some movie character, a celebrity, an animal – it doesn't matter. In the end, it is you who defined it. Who put worth into it. Who made it work. You are not mimicking me, you are mimicking a future self called destoroyah. Take whats of use from me, and keep moving until you work yourself. And you will.
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  8. destoroyah added a post in a topic Destoroyah's Meltdown   

    @WorkInProgress I feel offended by that suggestion, you can't just come out of the blue and say that. You don't know what situation I am in. Working my job fulltime this month – because my colleague broke his leg/knee, and studying at the same time, failing exams and no one to cover my back. It'd get anyone to his limits, if you add the housekeeping. I can't retreat to my parents. My flatmates are nice but they're kind of "not grown up" at the same time. It's comparable to being a single mom with a job, I have like 45 free minutes per weekday if I want to live healthy. That is not enough time to sort my thoughts.
    Don't "go to psychiatrist" me, if I were in a situation grave enough – I wouldn't be chillin' on these forums. That is just about the worst thing anyone could say to me, spiting doubt in my own psychological integrity. Bah. If I were depressed – OK. If I wrote about suicide – OK. Obviously you haven't understood what I have been doing up there, I was analyzing myself on a deep level.
    I would daresay it requires a shitload of psychological integrity to even do that.
    I know you just rushed out "from the blind" – and that's cool, it's good to have you back, but you need to check up on people before you write. Stop being an idiot. No hard feelings, and I don't give a shit.
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  9. destoroyah added a post in a topic Thinking about proposing to girlfriend but worried that I may not have enough groomsmen   

    Ignoring your texts? Texting is for Sissys! Give him a call!
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  10. destoroyah added a post in a topic Destoroyah's Meltdown   

    Thank you all for the advice.
    It's good to see that you guys care.
    I will sort this shit out somehow – give me some time.
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  11. destoroyah added a post in a topic Destoroyah's Meltdown   

    @Pierce Don't worry. I wouldn't be here if I hadn't mastered death and rebirth.
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  12. destoroyah added a post in a topic If Game Quitters had ads, what would you like to see?   

    I personally think that advertisement contributes to the degeneration of humanity.
     
    But if you need the cash – go for it.
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  13. destoroyah added a post in a topic The Journey Within   

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_I2p50rb6E
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  14. destoroyah added a post in a topic The Warrior's Infinite Opus   

    LMFAO. Dude, I couldn't sleep either man, I think it's the weather, something is all fucky here!! I woke up with a twisted neck and today I felt like a zombie.
    PS: My balls were good though, check my Instagram:
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  15. destoroyah added a post in a topic The Game Destroyer's Journal   

    I'm sure you will very soon find a million better things in life than gaming!!
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