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mouse's journal 2: the squeakquel


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Tuesday 15th June 2021

I was very surprised to find that I already have an account on this forum (and even started a journal thread here last year.) I'd completely forgotten about it! If anything though, it proves that I've been very aware of my gaming addiction for a long time now.

It might be helpful for me to write more specifically about my bad experiences with games later but for this first entry I just want to say: I start playing computer games without intending to and/or I find it difficult or impossible to stop, and that's eaten a lot of my time for years now and contributed to failures and screw ups. It's a numbing activity that prevents me from dealing with things I feel even a little negative about. I don't want to do it anymore. It's not even fun, half the time I'm playing I'm bored and not enjoying myself, I just can't summon the idea of doing anything else.

I'm not going to commit to any specific format for my journal entries (because I know whatever I decide I'll get bored and want to change later) but I do think some goal tracking will be useful and motivating, so long as I don't overcomplicate them or have too many going on at once.

 

time checks for today:

No games- 11 hours 

No YouTube- 45 minutes (gotta start somewhere 😆)

 

Goal for today: shower (reward: ice-cream)

Goal for this week: plan summer calendar (including booking tickets etc. and sending arrangements emails) (reward: boat watching or visiting Isaac)

 

I hope everyone reading is having a good day and remembered to take their medication if applicable ❤️

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