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07.05.21, 46 days

There are no other options left, so I make a public commitment to study from now on. Am I late to the party? Definitely. Can I still change things at least a little? Also definitely. Let it be 5 hours a day, then we will see. I'll post something here every day.

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On 4/2/2021 at 11:42 PM, Rudianos said:

That's cool, @Zeno of EleaI'm proud of you! Actually, my sugar consumption is incredibly small too. I never drink anything sweetened, my only problem lies in pastry. Since dieting didn't actually work for me, I do believe Laura. Her theory suggests intuitive eating, which offers a variety of foods with no restrictions. I'll try it as soon as I would be able to.

 image.thumb.png.f095979879dad0421733f335d172078a.png

Yep, I still watch gaming videos, not going to lie. However, they do not trigger my cravings, but my Youtube time is still a mess which I want to fix just like you did.

I really like this picture. Thank you for motivating me in my journal! I am here to support you if you need a hand. (´。• ᵕ •。`) ♡

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08.05.21, 47 days

Studied some maths today. I need a reliable plan to get things done and earn my points. Tomorrow I'll contact my tutors.

Content warning: suicide mentions

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Wanted to vent a bit, so here's a short story — my black dog drives me insane to the point of intrusive thoughts of killing myself. My life isn't, ugh, that bad, no, I just feel stuck and lonely because all my friends are gone. Don't get me wrong, I dream of enrolling college, getting MBA afterwards and making six figures. I strive to be a better person, I'm interested in everything what surrounds me. Really. But it feels like a heavy unbearable burden. My future, which consists of studying 24/7, scares me as hell. What if I can't do it? What if my own brain won't let me do it? I'm tired. I'm very, very tired.

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Why do you have to study 24/7? Thats unhealthy and unsustainable.

When i was an undergraduate student one of my course mates said that I worried too much about making mistakes. I then noticed that other people did fine with the mistakes and without all the worrying. Just read from Atomic habits: people are swayed heavily by peer pressure. So the wrong kind of narrative is people trying to scare you about failing. If you love what you are doing, got discipline and self-monitoring, you will not fail. And you won’t have to sacrifice your health for it.

Another thing is, it is not a hard rule that a high grade scorer gets the highest achievements in life. In fact more practical, focused, healthy people who take care of their needs first and set priorities get the highest achievements in life. Whereas stressed die hard workers most often fail.

I’ll tell you, when i was warming up for my boxing fight I wanted to do each exercise to the dot.. and when I entered the ring, i had no strength left to fight. I lost that fight and had an insight: i was ignoring the needs of my body and tired it before the fight. Next time i warmed up the amount I needed, without copying someone who may have had very different needs to mine.

Don’t ever let yourself be pressured by this world. 

In my previous job, i was at times sacrificing my needs to spend more time on the job. Then i noticed something fishy: my manager who ever pressured me, found time for birthday cakes, all the other celebrations that happen throughout the year. So even the people that apply pressure, frequently don’t act that way in relation to themselves.

Edited by Amphibian220
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11.05.21, 50 days

Thanks for replies everyone, I appreciate that!

The concept of studying 24/7 is surely an exaggeration, I simply wanted to note high study loads during college that I'm afraid I won't be able to handle even with time management  — mental health issues, indeed, suck. And as @Amphibian220 said, "people are swayed heavily by peer pressure" and this exact statement is, sadly, true. "If you don't enter early then you've failed in life" and so on. However, I have to sacrifice my needs right now to get a stable job and move out as soon as possible because I think my family will drive me mad if I stay one extra year at home.

For me a vicious cycle of learning is hell too, @cham0mil5! What studying smart means for you? I've read about this idea many different opinions, even bumped into a guy at youtube who is studying 12 hours a day. If you got interested:

 

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