Derealization

[Code]

Hi,

I've brought this topic up in the Discord and I was just wondering if anyone is or has been experiecing the same problem as I have. And how long it took for them to tackle this.

Derealization
Both the real world and World of Warcraft seem like simulations to me. A doorknob in WoW is programmed, but to me. A doorknob in real life is also programmed. They offer the same intrinsic value to me. I feel like this is what makes me fail everytime I try to quit. There will be a moment when I get so fed up with the idea that nothing matters to me outside of WoW, that I start playing again to feel happiness. Usually I temporarily fill this pain by playing other games, but this time I'm not playing any games. 

Support
When I looked on Discord, people are really helpful. I appreciate it a lot. But I feel missunderstood. People tell me ''games have no value''. Yes, but that doesn't solve my problem. Because to me it does have value. Whenever I ask myself: ''Do I rather have a rank 1 gladiator title or whatever achievement in real life (wealth / work success / great body / anything you can think of). It's always the seasons rank 1 gladiator title. I want nothing more. Although meaningless for most, it is not meaningless to me. Someone told me, get an A4 and fold it in two. Write ''Gladiator Title'' on one side, and 25 real life goals on the other side. Now pick one. How pathetic it sounds, I feel very little for real world achievements. I feel like I'm not alive, but my character is, and I'm just controlling it. 

So in short, I understand that I'm ''supposed'' to feel like real world achievements have more value, but to me they simply don't have value. 

 

 

Edited February 18, 2021 by Code

[pdallair91]

On 2/18/2021 at 6:53 AM, Code said:

So in short, I understand that I'm ''supposed'' to feel like real world achievements have more value, but to me they simply don't have value. 

 

 

I feel you my friend.  It's day 7 for me and everything feels like "work".  Part of this is probably anhedonia where, after having relied on artificial stimulation for so long; the brain needs time to get the "natural" dopamine gears going.  Another part of this, personally, is probably all the negative feelings I've been avoiding through video games now free to wreak havoc; the mind needs time to learn how to identify and cope with pain and distress "properly" now.

I've been through a lot of therapy already so I have an advantage, I know my outlook can be inaccurate and feelings can change.  Like you, I'm tempted to believe that these "real world achievements [...] simply don't have value".  However, as much as it is a fact that I currently feel this way, I'm also confident it's a fact that this feeling will not last forever.  With perseverance, we can come to notice and nurture a fair amount of comfort (like safety and joy) in other aspects of our lives.  We are more than just gamers.

We are both grieving now my friend, letting go of something that felt so precious is difficult.  Let's give ourselves the time that we need to adapt.  🙏  Take care. ❤️

edit: Re-word some parts to seem less judgemental.

Edited February 19, 2021 by pdallair91

[creationlist]

On 2/18/2021 at 12:53 PM, Code said:

So in short, I understand that I'm ''supposed'' to feel like real world achievements have more value, but to me they simply don't have value.

This depends completely on what you connect the values to, i'd say.

For example: If you do have a nice community to play with but are not able to talk to people in real live, that explains alot.

If you manage to socialize and then remember your experiences there, you find that real interaction has alot more value.

People always stick to their place where it's most comfortable for them.
Once you put a little bit of work into socializing you will find that more comfortable than sitting in a dark room watching animated pixels.

Games do have value, that is true. But they are a 100% time waster.

I like that you stick to your own oppineons, regardless of what other peopel say. Thats a big lesson in live.

In my oppineon that is. Good luck.

Edited February 22, 2021 by creationlist