WhoCares 306 Posted December 23, 2020 Author Share Posted December 23, 2020 One week Overwatch free. I feel guilty for not replying on your posts, I’ll try to fix it during the week. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pochatok 314 Posted December 24, 2020 Share Posted December 24, 2020 5 hours ago, WhoCares said: One week Overwatch free. I feel guilty for not replying on your posts, I’ll try to fix it during the week. Congrats on a full week! Hope you're feeling good about it 🙂 It's totally fine you aren't replying much, there is no obligation to do so. We know you are here reading our replies now and then : > 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheNewMe2.0 1818 Posted December 24, 2020 Share Posted December 24, 2020 Yeah good job getting off the games. keep putting in the effort. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhoCares 306 Posted December 30, 2020 Author Share Posted December 30, 2020 2 weeks no games, I was too busy to even think about playing. Now I've finished all my essential tasks and I've been thinking about playing since then. I guess I'll relapse today. Honestly don't care 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pochatok 314 Posted December 30, 2020 Share Posted December 30, 2020 6 hours ago, WhoCares said: 2 weeks no games, I was too busy to even think about playing. Now I've finished all my essential tasks and I've been thinking about playing since then. I guess I'll relapse today. Honestly don't care I think that's okay. I've been relapsing every two weeks or so too. Glad you have been able to sustain it for so long though, two weeks is quite a bit of time! But, I do hope that you'll be able to keep yourself passionate enough about other things to stay away from games. Don't give uppppppp : > Po 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaBest 808 Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 14 hours ago, WhoCares said: 2 weeks no games, I was too busy to even think about playing. Now I've finished all my essential tasks and I've been thinking about playing since then. I guess I'll relapse today. Honestly don't care 2 weeks? Great job! Notice how when you have a void in your schedule that you start thinking about playing games again. Free time is where bad habits can thrive. Is there anything you would want to do besides gaming, that you like/love to do? Keep up the good work! 🙂 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhoCares 306 Posted January 4 Author Share Posted January 4 (edited) After 2.5 weeks break I played Overwatch again.. for 7 hours straight. Now I know for sure, it's too late for me. No matter what I do, no matter what people are around me, I am thinking only about that shitty game. Not sure why I am even trying at this point. If Overwatch is the only thing I enjoy, what's the point in attempting to limit myself. Why wouldn't I just stop this shit and go back to playing nonstop. Maybe it's because the idea of being a fucking loser video game nerd makes me sick. I fucking despise myself. I don't know what to do. It's just so fucked up. I play Overwatch because my life is shit, but then I play I realize that Overwatch is shit too. There's no comfort zone, whatever I do I feel unsatisfied. My life is a fucking joke. I was doing my homework for the next semester, far before the deadline. Usually I just do shit on the last day. But instead of being proud for myself for finally doing my shit in time, it made me depressed as fuck. Edited January 4 by WhoCares 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhoCares 306 Posted January 4 Author Share Posted January 4 Alright, I'm done with my bitching. I'm gonna play Overwatch whenever I like. No more restrictions. I want to be happy. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pochatok 314 Posted January 5 Share Posted January 5 Hey @WhoCares, no matter how things are going for you, please keep posting here! LiFe taKeS all kInDs of DiRecTioNs, you know, and I don't think there is anything wrong with letting yourself relief all that stress you've been accumulating. It sounds like life is pretty hard right now- so do whatever you need to stay afloat and not drown. Again, you're only ~17(when's your birthday hmmmm), and there is still so much ahead of you. I didn't even get to a two-week strike until I was 19. You're doing okay! Po 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaBest 808 Posted January 5 Share Posted January 5 Definitely agree with @Pochatok. Keep posting, when you're ready to try again, try again. Everyone moves at their own speed. I feel bad that you don't feel good regardless of whether or not you play Overwatch or not. It's hard and I can understand the feeling of being discontented with everything. I felt like that back in April, and so I know it really sucks. It comes and goes. You may have heard this before, I think it was from Nietzsche, but there's a quote that goes something like "He who has a why can bear almost any how." Finding the why is difficult. There's some north star out there for you that will guide you, but perhaps you just haven't been able to point it out yet. You're on your way to finding it. Your body and mind is telling you something is wrong and needs to change, otherwise I don't think you would have tried quitting Overwatch in the first place. This sucks, but the only way to getting out of this mess, is to try, fail, try again, fail, try again, fail, etc., and with each iteration get a little bit closer to something better. This is the only way I've found to be remotely successful of feeling less terrible. There's no magic wand that fixes stuff--I fantasize about it a lot, but I haven't found it yet. I have faith in you, @WhoCares. For you to fight through what you've been going through makes you a strong person. Lesser men would've given up long ago, and even lesser men don't ever even try. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amphibian220 397 Posted January 5 Share Posted January 5 (edited) @WhoCares, Overwatch is the only thing you enjoy because the game designers created a product for overstimulating your brain. It was trained to crave that level of overstimulation by the act of you playing. To answer your question: The point in attempting to limit yourself (in fact to stay away as much as possible) is to bring back yourself to a point where you start noticing people around you, start coming back to your real emotions, interests and goals, and working at slowly improving all areas of your life. The greatest driver is potential for what you can achieve. You have bloodied the nose of this addiction multiple times and now it trying to trick you again. What you did absolutely matters. I suggest reading a book that I read twice, “Power of habit”. The beginning talks of a lady who was so much into smoking as an escape mechanism, that many areas of her life suffered. She then got some savings and travelled to Cairo, Egypt to clear her head. She was woken up in the early morning by a call to prayer and routinely tried to light up a cigarette. She wasn’t having any luck until she realized she was trying to light up a writing pen. This illustrates how ingrained the habit had become. Later on in the day she hired a taxi and went for a drive. She observed the beautiful desert and gradually came to a resolution that she would cross the desert on her own as a runner. Her new found goal was so powerful and overwhelming she was ready to go to all necessary costs and the pains to achieve it. She actually did that, she totally reformatted her bad habit into a healthy one. Please read this book. Edited January 5 by Amphibian220 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bird By Bird 161 Posted January 5 Share Posted January 5 @WhoCaresIt's fine to take a break from quitting and relapse if you are feeling suicidal. Have you seen a doctor? You should see a doctor or psychiatrist because that therapist you saw told you to. At this point any general practitioner will be fine. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WorkInProgress 1799 Posted January 5 Share Posted January 5 Playing seems to be a plaster distraction from other problems you have. If these let you feel the way you described I would also just play and maybe trying to see a psychiatrist first before you detox agsin. Feel free to post how your doing anyway. I personally would find it interesting and I seen in the past people get better here with similar problems. Best of luck to you 🤞 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhoCares 306 Posted January 13 Author Share Posted January 13 I’m 18. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pochatok 314 Posted January 14 Share Posted January 14 7 hours ago, WhoCares said: I’m 18. Oo Damn, happy Birthday! Doesn't feel any different from that point tbh. I honestly think that I am still 18 (+2). Anyways, congrats on making it this far!!! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaBest 808 Posted January 14 Share Posted January 14 Happy Birthday! Congrats on being a day older than you were yesterday 😄 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhoCares 306 Posted January 14 Author Share Posted January 14 @Pochatok @DaBestThank you guys 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhoCares 306 Posted January 29 Author Share Posted January 29 Hey everyone, it’s been a while. I am still resisting. Deleted and installed Overwatch for about 5 times in a few weeks. I think I’m unable to be satisfied with myself while playing. I don’t have much to say, I’ve said a lot here in the past and nothing really changed since then. Let me try to be a bit more positive than usual and post a pic that I took today instead of telling everyone again and again how miserable I am. Here it is: 5 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhoCares 306 Posted February 2 Author Share Posted February 2 I wanted to watch Overwatch streams on Twitch, but decided to read a book instead. Feels good. Guess I’m getting better. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheNewMe2.0 1818 Posted February 3 Share Posted February 3 Beautiful picture. Nice building. Good job quitting. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhoCares 306 Posted February 4 Author Share Posted February 4 14 hours ago, TheNewMe2.0 said: Beautiful picture. Nice building. Good job quitting. Thank you. It's Burj Al Arab hotel in Dubai. I'm craving to play much less while traveling. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheNewMe2.0 1818 Posted February 4 Share Posted February 4 Well that's good to hear. Maybe it's having something to do and also the novelty of travel that is helping. What do you think is working about traveling for you? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhoCares 306 Posted February 4 Author Share Posted February 4 5 hours ago, TheNewMe2.0 said: Well that's good to hear. Maybe it's having something to do and also the novelty of travel that is helping. What do you think is working about traveling for you? Yeah, I think it’s all about having something to do. I’m traveling pretty frequently (well, before pandemic) and every time it’s exciting to experience something new, something unusual. It get’s me so motivated, that I even start reading books and study much harder while traveling. And when I get home, all my motivation disappears. I feel like my comfort zone is killing every attempt to change myself. Even sitting in front of my PC at home triggers me to play. I think I definitely should get outside more frequently. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheNewMe2.0 1818 Posted February 5 Share Posted February 5 Yeah get out. Enjoy the outdoors if weather permits. I like to go hiking with my mom when I can. Although that's usually 6 months out of the year because winter and summer are too extreme where I live to go out. That's cool you have a good reaction to travel. I haven't traveled anywhere in a while. Not since I vacationed at a resort in mexico. That was nice though. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhoCares 306 Posted February 13 Author Share Posted February 13 (edited) I can't stop playing. I hate myself. I'm full of shit Overwatch has ruined me, now I'm nothing. I just watch my life going to shit. I have the most important exams in my life in 2 months, people prepare for them for years, I haven't even started yet and not sure if I will. The saddest part is that I could change it, I'm not stupid and I have access to crazy amount of money. I could do whatever I want, but all I do is sit on my ass and play stupid shit all day. I am ashamed of existing, I don't deserve it. Edited February 13 by WhoCares 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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