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MuMuMelon's Diary


MuMuMelon

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Day 67

Another relaxed day. Got up and did an hour of meditation then made some breakfast. After that I went for a hike and listened to some more lectures on NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming). Got home and made up a batch of chili. Sooooo damn good. Man I love to cook. 

Did some breathing exercises after that and then I spent the rest of the day chilling out. Watched some youtube videos, played some board games, hung out with my cat. Nice day. No anxiety. Just a good day.

Night. 

 

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Day 68

Another nice day. Did my usual routine in the morning (meditation, hike) and had a nice oatmeal breakfast. (While on my hike I listened to two more lectures on NLP.) When I got back I went grocery shopping with my wife. Then I spent some time surfing the world wide web and made some lunch. Then I hit the treadmill for 30 minutes for a brisk walk, did some Wim-Hof Breathing exercises and practiced a short meditation session. Later, I played a couple board games with my wife. Good times. We both won one game each. Always nice when we get a chance to spend some time together and play some board games. Don't much time for that as her schedule is pretty tight. 

All is well. Only the tiniest of cravings for vids today.

Take care all!

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Day 69

Woke up this morning with some crazy back pain. Not sure which thing I did yesterday that caused this but I've been having back spasms pretty much all day. I can get around and drive but that's about it. I'm so glad to not be working tomorrow because I'd have to take the day off. I know this all boils down to me having weak core muscles. When I can comfortably do anything again I'm going to start a regimen of core exercises so thing shit doesn't happen again. 

Didn't get up to too much today for obvious reasons. I meditated in the morning for an hour before I picked up a SCOBY (Symbiotic culture of Bacteria and Yeast - in case your wondering) from a nice lady who donated one of hers. Tomorrow I'll start a batch of Kombucha with it and see what happens. Brewing Kombucha is new to me but I'm liking the adventure. 

After that my wife and I drove to Hamilton to visit my brother, his wife and my father for a BBQ dinner. Since this whole quarantine thing has been going down my bro has been getting into smoking meats. Tonight we had slow cooked, smoked ribs and slow cooked, smoked beans. Damn. I'm not just saying this because my brother made them but these were the best damn ribs I have ever had in my life. I am so stuffed right now. Between him and his wife we had some delicious food. 

Now I'm home, my back hurts and I'm full of ribs. Going to chill for a bit but probably going to bed real soon.

Hope you all had a good weekend!

Edited by MuMuMelon
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Day 71

Missed posting yesterday but there wasn't much to report. I basically spent the day surfing youtube, watched Venom (okay), and played some board games. My back is still f'd so I couldn't do much.

Today isn't much different. I did some dishes, drove my wife to her doctors appointment (a few too many people lined up for Covid testing for my liking) and spent the rest of the day nursing my back and watching the first season of Cobra Kai on Netflix (loved it). I managed to make some breakfast but I couldn't really cook too much else in my condition. Fortunately, I booked an appointment with a massage therapist for tomorrow. I'm eager for these back spasms to go away. Really getting in the way of my routine. At least I've been able to meditate and continue with my Wim-Hof exercises. I really want my back to heal so I can commit to doing core exercises every other day. This is the 3rd time this year that I've had debilitating back pain and I'm sure it's core related.

Hope everybody is doing good with not gaming. Keep it up! Night all. 

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Day 73

Yesterday (Day 72) was another lazy/recovery day. I went to get a massage in the morning but I spent the rest of the day visiting a good friend. We played some board games and spent the day relaxing. 

Today, while my back is still sore I do feel like I'm getting better. After talking to the massage therapist yesterday it has come to my attention that my back pain is actually being caused by my diaphragm. Ya see, the diaphragm is connected roughly to the middle of your back and when you do things like, strenuous breathing as it turns out, you can overwork it like you can any muscle. However, when you overwork your diaphragm is feels like somebody is stabbing you in the middle of the back and your whole back seizes up so you can't move for a few seconds. It's like being frozen in intense pain for a few seconds at a time. Fortunately, now that I know what the issue is I'm no longer terrified that I did some serious damage to my spine. I'm still going to closely monitor the situation but I think this will blow over soon. After I recover I will resume the Wim-Hof breathing but at a slower pace and with breaks in between days where I practice. Damn, that really hurt for a couple of days. Like, the pain was so bad, that all I could do was lie or sit down and that more or less hurt too. Who knew you could hurt yourself breathing too hard. Not me that's for sure.

I didn't get up to much today. Meditated in the morning, did some errands with my wife in the afternoon, watched the second season of Cobra Kai, did some dishes and folded some laundry. Finally, I just brewed up a big old pot of tea to make some Kombucha. Hopefully, this batch will be better then the last.

Keep kicking ass everybody! Cobra Kai! Cobra Kai! Cobra Kai!

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Day 74

Went to visit my in laws today and had a mostly boring time. We never really get up to anything whenever we visit them. My father in law basically talks the entire time and everybody else sits around and listens with glossed over eyes. It's about as exciting as it sounds. Next time I go I'm bringing a book and some board games. I will suggest we play a game or something to pass the time but if he's not into that I will politely excuse myself and go read a book. My wife will understand. She's had enough of this drudgery herself. I got back about an hour ago so I really didn't do much today except politely listen to a man tell insanely boring stories. 

Sorry, not trying to complain but this shit is crazy. I'm a point in my life where If I'm not enjoying something I'll cut it out of my life. Really wishing I could cut these visits out of my life. The man is a colossal bore who seems to know everything and will talk at you for as long as you'll let him. Okay enough. No more negativity.

Have a good night all. I hope quitting feels easy today. 

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Day 75

Another day of taking it easy. My chest and back are still sore but I'm capable of doing stuff with out having sharp pains in my back now. Went for a hike in the afternoon, did some grocery shopping and ran some errands with my wife. By the time we got back it was after 6. Did a little more meditation after that. Other then that not much else going on today. I'm really looking forward to fully recovering from this injury so I can get back to doing Yoga. Also, this pain has been a bit of a distraction. I need to start planning out my days and following through. I'm feeling good about quitting gaming but I still don't feel like my life has changed much. I mean, I know it has, I think I just need to make bigger strides and achieve bigger accomplishments in order to feel like I'm moving forward. I'll just have to wrap my head around this over the next couple of days. 

Later quitters. Night. 

 

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Day 77,

Hey @AbjurationWizard, thanks for checking in. Yeah, my back is still a little sore but no more sharp pains or anything. Looking at things now I'm pretty sure I injured my diaphragm, not my back. I'm not a doctor but I'm pretty sure I was overdoing it on all the Wim-Hof breathing exercises. I did some light research online and found other people in the same situation with the same symptoms. I don't think my 20 years smoking helped the situation. I've been taking it easy. Won't be back at work until the 28th so I should be ship shape by then I hope. 

I just wanted to say that I hope all of you are finding the quit to be easier. It's definitely weird to not be gaming anymore. I'd been doing it for so long I didn't really know what else to do with myself. These days I'm just glad to be free. Still not exactly sure what I want to do but that's okay. I have the freedom to make new choices and that feels really good. I wish that for all of you. 

The last two days I've been meditating and just thinking a lot. I'm focusing more on being grateful for what I have and accepting of what I don't. 

All the very best to this motley crew of quitters! You deserve all the happiness and freedom you desire! 

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Day 78

Spent the day driving my wife around to London, Ontario and the surrounding area to pick up fabric for her business. While she was shopping for fabric I decided to go to a local vintage/thrift shop. Normally when I've been there I would fixate on any vintage video game stuff I could get my eyes on. This time I just acknowledged that there were stalls full of video game stuff but just walked on by. That was a nice feeling. 

 It was a good day of driving in the country and mainly relaxing. I find that I don't get stressed out when I drive these days. I do my best to stay calm and let traffic flow as it wants to. I used to get mad behind the wheel a lot. I just don't have time for that anymore. What's the point in being angry all the time.

We got back about an hour ago and I had a bath and am about to go to bed. Tomorrow I'm thinking of heading out to Niagara Falls to go for a day hike and try to get in touch with nature.

Take care all.

 

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Day 84

I was away at a friends cottage over the weekend and helped him to board up the windows and pull in his dock for the coming winter. The weather was beautiful but a bit cold. Overall, I had a great time getting out into nature and visiting my friend. It also felt good to get some physical labor in as well.

Today was a pretty busy day. My wife and I went to a float spa at 9:30 in the morning. This was a new experience for us and I found it very peaceful. As the experience was so foreign I had a lot of trouble truly relaxing into the experience. So, while I enjoyed it I had difficulty letting go. I think I need to do it  a few more times before I can really get into it. 

After that we went to a nice restaurant not far from the float spa. As it turns out they had a good amount of gluten free options that my wife could enjoy. It's always nice when she doesn't have to compromise when we go out to eat. From there we went to Value Village and did some thrift shopping. She grabbed a bunch of mason jars and I found a few books. All in all some good purchases. 

When we got home I went for a good long walk. I listened to a Udemy class while I walked. I'm really enjoying listening to lectures and audio books these days. I find it very educational and I can do it while I do something else. I may not be getting as much out of listening as I likely would by reading a book but, if I'm being honest, I just don't read that much (or that fast for that matter). I'm willing to miss a little for that convenience. 

When I got back I did a breath work class on MeetUp. Todays session was really great. I really felt like I was going deeper into the exercise then I have yet. 

I recently caught my old gaming friends discussing the new PS5 on Discord. I realized that I don't really care anymore. I'm loving the peace that not gaming has brought to my life. I'm grateful to all the time I now have since I put video games behind me. I feel more and more that I am finally free of this addiction. I intend to be vigilant but I do feel confident that I'm past my gaming days. I really feel like I have so much more to do now that I've stopped. I'm learning more, trying new things and just appreciating life more. Sure, there are still times when I get bored but that can happen to anybody, not just gaming addicts. I do my best to work through the boredom instead of just sitting in that bored state. 

I think I'm going to do some reading before I head off to bed. I just picked up some reading glasses and I find reading is much easier for me now. Now sure why I put off getting a pair for so long. 

Hope all you quitters are sticking to it!

Keep it up. You deserve the freedom! 

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Day 85

Did some thrift shopping in the morning with Adrienne. Found some more books to add to our library. Got home and then went out for lunch at Dairy Queen (not the healthiest choice I know) and then went for a hike. Listened to a video on self actualization while I hiked around. Very interesting stuff. 

When I got home I had a smoothie and then sat down to meditate for an hour. After that I did some work on a board game that I've been meaning to finish making. Nearly there! 

Read some more of The Secret Life of Plants. I'm planning on finishing it this week. I'd like to start a schedule of reading a book per week. It's a tall order for me but I know I can do it. I want to try it for one year and see how I feel. I'm just going to read. Even if I'm not enjoying the book i intend to finish it. 

After that I played a new board game with Adrienne called Century. Pretty great little game that was easy to learn, moved along at a nice pace and had beautiful components. 

Now I am going to bed. 

Night all. Keep it up. 

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5 hours ago, royal panda said:

I am glad you're doing well! Also making a board game is such a good idea, can you show me when it's done? Also good luck on reading a book a week.

Hey thanks @royal panda! I will show you some pics of the prototype when the game is done for sure! Also, so far so good with a book a week. I'm starting off by finishing The Secret World of Plants. I calculated how many pages I need to read each day to finish and I find that very helpful. Thanks for the inspiration!

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Day 86

Day 90 is quickly approaching and I couldn't be happier. I'm proud of myself. I'm planning on taking a nice drive and eating at a nice restaurant on the day.

Today was productive I'm happy to report. Got up early (ish) and did some meditation. Then I made some oatmeal (almond butter and raspberry with a touch of maple syrup) for breakfast before heading out on a walk. Nearly finished up my Minfulness Udemy Class (Section 2) while I walked. Picked up some lightbulbs for the bathroom on my way home and replaced them when I got in. 

After that I made some dinner. Tuna steaks, rice and some lightly fried peppers. Delicious! 

Then I went out to pick up a couple of board games from a local seller. Two games I've been looking to try for a while (although I likely won't get to try them anytime soon due to this pandemic situation), Claustraphobia and Dead of Winter. Hopefully I'll get to play them before the end of next year. 

When I got back from doing that I did some Yoga, some breathwork and some stretching to finish up. Now I'm in bed and reading. I planned to do some more work on my game today but I just didn't leave myself enough time. I really want to keep up with this reading challenge. 

That being said, I'm off to read some more and then to bed. 

Night gang! 

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Day 87

I did not eat well today. So much junk food. Productive day visiting my Dad and brother but man I feel like crap right now. I struggle with food a lot. I know that I want to be fit and flexible but then I eat a bunch of junk and feel bad about myself. I guess I have to admit that I've always low key had an addiction to junk food. Guess that's next on the list. Time to sort out my eating habits once and for all. Well, I mean, I already got three addictions under control...guess it's time to sort out how I eat. 

Tomorrow I'm off to work for the first day in quite a while. Unfortunately that means getting covid tested (swab up the nose) first thing in the morning. I'll be glad to get back to work but I could do without that.

Hope everybody has a great night. 

Edited by MuMuMelon
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20 hours ago, BooksandTrees said:

I think as we quit one addiction we realize there's another one. I gained about 20 lbs my first year from gaming and recently lost 30 lbs this year. Take your time with these things. Over time you'll become the person you're striving to become. Just trust yourself. 

Thanks for passing that along. I guess as we clear away the cobwebs we can start to see a little more clearly. I've kind of known that I've had issues with food for a good long while, but it's only been the last year or two that I have really wanted to sort it out. 

That was helpful.

Thanks. 

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Day 90!

I'm very happy to say that tonight marks the end of Day 90. I can't say for certain, but I believe this is the longest I have gone without playing video games in at least 20 years. This addiction has eaten up so much of time, but no more! Thanks to this website and to all the fine folks here that have chimed in and provided support. This is a wonderful site and I hope that it can help so many more people to rid themselves of this pointless time sink of an addiction. 

Funnily enough, I had a dream last night about being at some bar where they had a Galaga arcade cabinet. For a while I was pretty excited about getting the chance to play it. However, just when I was about to put a quarter into the cabinet I remembered that I had quit. Even in my dream I recognized that and walked away. That's new for me. Before, when I attempted to quit smoking in the past, I would have dreams about smoking and then wake up regretting it. It always felt good to realize that it was just a dream but it feels better to have turned down playing a game in my dream instead of letting myself just go for it. I really feel like I have been making progress. Not just with quitting video games but with life. Quitting the video games has forced to look at my life and start to make changes for the better. Before, I was just coasting along. These days I think about what I'm doing a lot more. I still don't know precisely what I want to do but I'm making strides towards a better understanding. I know that I value my time so much more. Even the days that I'm feeling bad. I would rather feel bad then just give myself over to video games and pot. I guess having a clear head has it's ups and downs but that's okay. 

It may have taken me a long time to get here but I'm glad I arrived. I might be 44 but I still have time to learn, grow and experience life with so much more clarity then I have in over 20 years. The video games no longer own me. Because of this site I have started to learn new hobbies and I have started to have a much better understanding of myself. This isn't the nicest thing to say but it's true....this pandemic has been very good for me. I know that for a lot of people this has been a very stressful time. I get that. I was fortunate though, that it gave me the time to recognize my problems and to deal with them. I don't think I would have come to these conclusions if I didn't have all this time to think. Interestingly, my 90th day comes just before my first real day back at work. 

I didn't finish the book I've been reading yet, but I will have it finished by the end of this week. I may have been biting off more then I could chew with one book a week. I'll aim for one book every two weeks. That would still be a huge amount of books for me. 

Here's to quitting! I hope that everybody here makes the choice to free themselves from this addiction. You are all worth so much more then video games can provide!

 

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Day 91

I was back at work today and that felt pretty good. Wasn't too crazy of a day so it was a nice way to ease back in. 

Before I went to work I did about an hour of meditation.

After work I joined in on a breathwork class and it was really great. I'm starting to feel results from all this stuff. I can definitely breath deeper and with more strength. These classes are really important to me. An a heavy ex smoker I really think these classes are boosting my lungs and my confidence. 

However....I did eat a bunch of ice cream and had a coke earlier. Not very proud of that. Getting my eating habits under control might be harder then quitting video games. 

I signed up for some Yoga classes starting in mid October though so that should help motivate me to eat healthier and lose some weight. 

Still pretty stoked that I've dropped playing vids, quit smoking and nearly completely stopped smoking weed. Honestly, I know I need to work on how I eat but I'm still super proud of these other accomplishments. It's been a big year for me. (I'm patting myself on the back while I type this.) 

Next step physical fitness. 

Take care all.

 

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On 9/28/2020 at 4:55 AM, MuMuMelon said:

Day 90!

 

14 hours ago, MuMuMelon said:

Still pretty stoked that I've dropped playing vids, quit smoking and nearly completely stopped smoking weed. Honestly, I know I need to work on how I eat but I'm still super proud of these other accomplishments. It's been a big year for me

Very fucking proud of you. WAW!

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