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Empathy

empathic journal

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1 hour ago, Empathy said:

Internet time on.
I feel really sad and lonely right now.
Possible withdrawal, right?

Oh, I feel you. Maybe it is because you removed something significant to yourself without giving in return. I would feel heartbroken in that case. How about a new hobby? So you would do something different yet engaging instead of sitting and brooding.

 

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Internet time on.
@Erik2.0 Yeah, I watched couple of testimonies of other people about the same problem I have and same of hmm tutorials? About how to quit video games in 60 seconds or 90 day detox. I have to watch all of the videos on a playlist start here.

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Internet time off.
I see it's a good habit to write here a post each time I start and finish using Internet. I just feel I need it.

9 hours ago, Xgamer said:

Oh, I feel you. Maybe it is because you removed something significant to yourself without giving in return. I would feel heartbroken in that case. How about a new hobby? So you would do something different yet engaging instead of sitting and brooding.

 

I relate to this 100%. I have to take care of my work, but I don't feel motivation or energy for this. Whenever I'm under pressure I can't engage into other hobby activities.
I walked yesterday for 30 minutes and it helped me relieve some pressure, but also made me more tired.

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Internet time on. 

I gamed for 50 minutes. God damn it. 50 fuckin minutes.

I have to stop. Uninstalled the game that made me play.

It's all on my mind. I can take care of this.

Internet time off.

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Internet time on.

Wasted couple of hours on Slay The Spire.

I hate it.

I literally hate it.

Internet time off.

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On 3/10/2020 at 12:41 PM, Empathy said:

But I won't give up!

So why don't you write in this journal what is causing you to relapse, why you've been playing video games, what got you into playing video games, what your triggers that make you want to play games are, and any emotional needs to play them. You're relying on pure willpower right now and that doesn't work.

If you can find out reasons you're playing such as loneliness, depression, boredom, stress, anxiety, no hobbies, no friends, bad family life, bad work, bad schooling, etc. then you can start working on substitution activities to take up your time to replace gaming. You're only going to overcome gaming by replacing the time you spend gaming. That's only done by investigating why you spend time gaming.

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@BooksandTrees It's really complex situation and I don't really know if I can describe it here properly.
I'm working with my therapist a lot on my case of technology addiction and it helps me a lot.
I am aware that my willpower is not enough. The biggest struggle is when I am home alone and don't have any alternative activity to do. What do you suggest to fill my free time instead of gaming?

 

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I have a lot of trouble to clean up my room. Everything is a mess around me right now. How to face it?

I tried dozens of times and still can't handle it.

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25 minutes ago, Empathy said:

@BooksandTrees It's really complex situation and I don't really know if I can describe it here properly.
I'm working with my therapist a lot on my case of technology addiction and it helps me a lot.
I am aware that my willpower is not enough. The biggest struggle is when I am home alone and don't have any alternative activity to do. What do you suggest to fill my free time instead of gaming?

 

I'm gonna respond to this once I get home from work. 

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22 minutes ago, Empathy said:

I have a lot of trouble to clean up my room. Everything is a mess around me right now. How to face it?

I tried dozens of times and still can't handle it.

You need to take a deep breath and realize the task at hand. Your room is a mess. Become a project manager and break it into tasks. 

First step is throwing out or disposing of food, old trash like wrappers and paper you don't use. Next step is sorting used laundry into bins and beginning to clean them. Next step is get everything off the floor and on shelves. Next step is vacuuming the floor. Next step is cleaning exposed surfaces of dust with a damp wash cloth.

List out everything you need to do, create an order of operations, and perform your tasks. Put some music on so you get a rhythm and stop over thinking. 

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8 hours ago, Empathy said:

@BooksandTrees It's really complex situation and I don't really know if I can describe it here properly.
I'm working with my therapist a lot on my case of technology addiction and it helps me a lot.
I am aware that my willpower is not enough. The biggest struggle is when I am home alone and don't have any alternative activity to do. What do you suggest to fill my free time instead of gaming?

 

I think you should read my post on this article: 500 days without gaming and how I quit

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Ok I read that. Thanks for recommendation!
Looks like I have a lot of things to do today.
Let's start with taking care of myself and hygiene stuff and as you suggest - breaking cleaning up my room into smaller pieces.
If I start to work remotely from a clean room, I'd definitely feel better.

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Just now, Empathy said:

I am taking care of cleaning up my room right now.

Take a before and after picture. Don't share it here if you're not comfortable. Just do it for yourself as proof you can do stuff like this. I believe in you. 

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