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NEW VIDEO: The Dark Side of Gaming (Documentary)

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Posted (edited)

Hello everyone!

I have been playing video games for as long as I can remember. TF2, L4D, CSGO bring me sweet memories when my friends and I were having fun together, I have even dated some girl online. Of course, all of that was fickle so I can`t even play those games anymore because I know I would never have the same fun I used to. That puts me off returning to those games. Rancours? I don`t know, maybe

The thing that made me do a first step is being fed up with toxicity and my dissatisfaction with gaming routine. I have always considered myself getting the short end of the stick despite investing so much time into gaming. I just couldn`t be the best there. It really hit home. Recently, I have tried to make drastic changes in my life but always relapsed. The breaking point was dev of game (I have grinded 800h in) announcing that the game would be cancelled soon (it all turned out to be as a christmas joke, it was not the dev, but some other dude). Then I realised how fragile and how pointless that I am doing. I was offended by it deeply but it was like a wake up call. Yet I still relapsed, but bounced back. I understand now what I am lacking. Support and an example of others.

So here I am 22, Russia, and I am fond of so many things guys, this is crazy:D front-end programming, game dev, harmonica, guitar, parkour, learning new languages. But most importantly, I am fond of people being nearby. Maybe, the main reason why I ve been playing hardcore is that I just couldn`t make friends and I hated being alone.

A lot of going to change after New Year. But here are my goals for now

1. Find a hobby and replace my idle existence with it. Write about it here

2. Pass 90 day detox and comment about it here

3. Get a job and earn good money

I ll start my challenge tomorrow because today was the day i relapsed once again.

Edited by Xgamer
typos
  • Like 1
Posted

Hello. It's a plesant surprise to find other russians here ?

We are similar in may ways with respect to gaming. TF2 was a place I spent ludicruos amounts of time in, and the rest of the games mentioned by you also bring some dear memories.

It was also the futility of what I was doing that got me to make a change. I looked back at all this ocean of time put into gaming - and it hurt me greatly to think how much time for improvement i've lost, especially in comparison to my classmates or fellow students (today) who were not playing. And even more - how little was gained in a long-term perspective.


Relapses hit me too, pretty frequently, only they come in forms of youtube binge-sessions, porn or simply wasting time and being anxious to give it up. They may come, but the important thing is that you stick with your goal to quit despite occasional faliures.

I'm close to your age - I'm 21 - and the problem of finding a place to work makes me very uncomfortable. It's just all this time that I would need to be spend at work.. Epecially after not being employed anywhere my entire life..

So I'm curious to see how your experience goes. And wish you luck with finding new activities to try. Asking random people (or friends of friends) about their hobbies seems helpful - they may be doing something they can introduce you to.


You've laid the foundation today. That is really important.

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