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Erik2.0

Erik's Daily Journal - A Better Life

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Day 71 NF 42 Np 25 Med 11

I accomplished going to my work meeting which I was missing often.

I'm grateful for medication, my hands, skin, paper, pencils, God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, dinosaurs, book stands and tv.

Early post today. I've got some time to kill while I'm waiting to talk to a school rep person. Things are still going pretty good. I almost got duped by a 'loan forgiveness' scam. I've got to stop spending money on things in general. It's hard to save and easy to spend. I guess if I just allow myself to buy only necessities would be best. It's nice to have money saved up. A lot nicer than having a pile of things and no money saved. I got kind of tired of reading peoples posts on here it's just kind of intense reading about peoples problems on  a daily basis. I'm maybe goin to try to do it every three days or so. I've got a book post to do so I guess I'll work on reading till my meeting comes. 

God bless

Erik

 

here are some goals I set

 

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Hi!

 

Yes it can be draining reading through others journals. Sometimes it good to connect with people on here and sometimes it’s just best to focus on yourself.  Just do what feels right to you. 
 

On your goals did I read that right? You want a girlfriend by 4 days ago? When it comes to dating, things cannot be rushed or pressured. We sorta have to trust God and His timing. 
 

I get bible verses everyday, I thought today’s might be helpful. Matthew 11:28 “Come to me all who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest”. 
 

Take care my friend. Talk soon. 

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Day 72 NF 43 Np 26 Med 12

I got through work. I am grateful for meds, books my desk my clients and supervisor my job my room my plant good health sleep clothes and hair 

@Icandothis yes that’s a good thing that bible verse was a relief to read. I put a girlfriend by a year from now but I must’ve typo some stuff. Idk maybe just letting god handle that in his time would be the best thing to do. I don’t like putting pressure on dating either.

today was a long day. Had some tough sessions but got through and I hope they’ll get better. Trying new sleep meds hope they work. And I pray everyone does well and is blessed .

God bless

Erik

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Day 73 NF 44 Np 27 Med 13

I accomplished getting through a tough session. 

I am grateful for my life, breath, body, mind, spirit, soul, teeth, gums, sweat, water, eye boogers, and nails.

Okay, today was hard because my client was refusing to switch turns with me on the time thing. So I'm going to put my foot down next session and let him know we're doing Erik time first from now on and his time in the session comes second. No more alternating turns because he has been too irresponsible with it and I just don't want to do it anymore like that. Ugh. I'd like to say he'll have to take it or leave it, but last time I tried something like this. He went and complained to his Dad. But this time it might be different if my supervisor backs me. Last time she agreed with the kid to work less. I'll ask her tomorrow if I can tell my client that Erik time comes first from now on no more alternating and ask if she thinks it's a good idea or it's best that I keep trying to alternate times with the guy. It's really become a major problem. He's too unruly and always clawing for every extra minute of his time he can get through coercion, complaining, rule breaking etc. It's a major headache to deal with and I got really upset today because it's been an issue every single session since I can remember. 

My meds aren't working so well. I've had insomnia for a while now. I'm hoping to get some new meds for sleep in the next few days. I'll just have to wait for sleep till then. Hopefully they work. God this job is hard. I'll keep going though. I'll make it work with the Erik time first paradigm. And maybe once a week we can go on mutual time outings to places like malls, hiking, etc. Yeah mmm.

Art is starting to come back into my life. I'm happy for that. It's uncomfortable, but I'm finding the comfort in the discomfort. 

I'm seriously fed up with fighting over minutes with these kids though. I think it really might be time to do Erik time first every time from now on. I deserve more control of these sessions. I'm responsible with the time and they're not. I think it might be time to stop letting them have any turns going first. It's harsh, but my supervisor seems to do it. Maybe it's best I do it too. Might be better than fighting over minutes and whose turn it is. 

Alright I'm done talking about it. I'll see what my supervisor says this weekend. 

I have a lot of complaints today. My mom's cooking is not good. I've tried to help her improve. I've verbally pushed her to actually follow recipies. And she just instantly goes back to cooking food that's just no good. There's no helping her. She doesn't want to improve. She just wants to boil everything....no amount of teaching, talking, educating etc will or has changed that. I have to cook every meal that I want to taste halfway decent.

 

Surprisingly she has improved at working out. I told her to get cardio everyday and now she does. I tried to teach her some strength training stuff but she wasn't going to learn that either. I've succeeded in getting her to walk on a treadmill. Hm. I was planning to try to get her to spend ten minutes once a week sitting down and talking with me. Something she's pretty much never done my whole life. She's constantly moving and running errands. The buddha called this sort of over business a sickness. It's how she copes. But I could use someone to talk to not just run errands with endlessly. I'm just so freaking fed up with everyone not being willing to try to work with me or meet me halfway. I'm so fed up with everyone and everything right now. This week was so hard doing extra work and extra group therapy and having insomnia getting worse. ugh. Last night I took a hydroxyzine because the insomnia was a lot. But I think it's affecting me negatively right now. I'm feeling pretty messed up and overly sensitive/irritable. 

Okay focus on some positive things Erik 

I love my little desk plant Charlotte. She's a succulent from Trader Joe's. She was kind of withering for a bit until I looked up how to care for succulents. It said they don't even need water in the winter. And only so little in the other seasons. So I stopped watering her! And wouldn't you know she perked up and now her leaves are as green as ever. They look all thick, springy and vibrantly colored. She has a little bunch of pink flowers in her center too. This plant makes me feel better about life. Which is kind of a sore spot for me if you can't tell. I also have this little dinosaur toy I found at a playground called sparky. My client X said it had been left there for months and no one reclaimed it. So I felt okay taking it home. He's turquoise in color which is my favorite color. He's the dinosaur with a fin like thing on the back of his head that stands on two legs. His mouth is like a tube. I loved my dinosaurs as a kid. 🙂 

I learned more about self-compassion therapy. The chapter was similar to Hakomi therapy. Which has led me to practice Hakomi with myself and my triggers. It has helped me out a lot with dealing with uncomfortable sensations I felt around the triggers. Now I'm able to feel comfort and surround the discomfort with the comfort like a glove holding a ball. I'm starting to be able to watch anime, draw, etc now. I'm feeling more confident in my ability to handle doing things that cause me anxiety.

God bless us all with a journey that we can handle. 

Erik

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Day 74 NF 45 Np 28 Med 14

I accomplished getting shoes and going for a hike.

I am grateful for my: moms cooking, clothes, my tv, body ball, weights, gym blanket pajama pants beanie and sweater.

Im feeling better today. Although it is my day off. Yeah last week was just a tough week. I think my meds and everything will be much better going forward. I’m feeling slightly bored and restless. I’ll try to do some hakomi therapy to chill.

In watching Jojos bizarre adventure I am reminded of how fire is like the power of life. That we all have a fire burning inside us that wants to live. The more time we stay away from gaming the greater that fire can grow and the more fully we can live.

Chilling on a saturday

 Long naps the sleepy way

Hyggie to keep it comfortable 

Trying to keep life stable

Like leaves on a tree I die and am born again, all according to Gods plan.

God bless

Erik

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Day 75 NF 46 Np 29 Med 15

Well another week comes. I'm going to try to apply my new format for sessions which will be 30 minutes of 'Erik time' at the start and the rest of the free time we can use for client time. I'm expecting some resistance to having my time come first every time, but that's what I'm offering and I'm not willing to offer switching times. This is because the clients rarely will get off their time to fulfill the deal and have Erik time at the end of session. Also I just want to say I'm glad I exploded in agony on here two posts ago and not in real life on my mom. She does the best she can. My cooking isn't that great yet either. 

🙂

I've been feeling kind of drained and down lately. I don't know why really. Maybe it was just the struggle of last week. ❤️ God willing it'll get better. I found a church I like today so I'll be trying it out next Sunday.

I accomplished watching three episodes of Jojo's bizarre adventure in a row. 

I am grateful for the Bible, gratitude as a means of creating happiness, art, art therapy, ladybugs, green plants, green things, turquoise, poetry, friends, family and everyone.

 

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Day 76 NF 47 Np 30 Med 16

A couple more weeks and it's my 90 day detox completed 🙂 . Excited for that. Art is proving difficult. I've really got to keep at it and keep trying. The lessons on YouTube aren't that easy to find good ones and I sometimes get overwhelmed with anxiety. Too much to keep trying. That being said I did some 'draw Naruto' tutorials that turned would well. I like them anyways. I've been pushing my anxiety limits. I think like a muscle I am and will slowly get stronger at handling more of the things that cause me anxiety. Eventually I'll be so strong I'll be able to do the things that once caused anxiety with ease. For now it's a struggle. I feel like giving up sometimes. I feel like doing the things that cause me anxiety give me acne so I'm probably going to get on stronger acne meds and keep pushing the anxiety anyways. I don't want to quit or give up. I want to keep going. I don't want to live a life where I can't do art because it causes me anxiety and acne. I've already gotten through the anxiety part somewhat. I've just got to get through the acne part and I'll be setup to just keep pushing until I can take it. God willing I'll be able to do it. 

I accomplished getting through another annoying group therapy where a monopolizer talked the whole time. Ugh. I don't like monopolizers. I'm thinking about telling them to talk less because they're talking too much. 

I'm grateful for trees, books, grass, hands, skin, sweaters, nature, indoors, heaters and ac. 

 

 

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39 minutes ago, Erik2.0 said:

Day 76 NF 47 Np 30 Med 16

A couple more weeks and it's my 90 day detox completed 🙂 . Excited for that. Art is proving difficult. I've really got to keep at it and keep trying. The lessons on YouTube aren't that easy to find good ones and I sometimes get overwhelmed with anxiety. Too much to keep trying. That being said I did some 'draw Naruto' tutorials that turned would well. I like them anyways. I've been pushing my anxiety limits. I think like a muscle I am and will slowly get stronger at handling more of the things that cause me anxiety. Eventually I'll be so strong I'll be able to do the things that once caused anxiety with ease. For now it's a struggle. I feel like giving up sometimes. I feel like doing the things that cause me anxiety give me acne so I'm probably going to get on stronger acne meds and keep pushing the anxiety anyways. I don't want to quit or give up. I want to keep going. I don't want to live a life where I can't do art because it causes me anxiety and acne. I've already gotten through the anxiety part somewhat. I've just got to get through the acne part and I'll be setup to just keep pushing until I can take it. God willing I'll be able to do it. 

I accomplished getting through another annoying group therapy where a monopolizer talked the whole time. Ugh. I don't like monopolizers. I'm thinking about telling them to talk less because they're talking too much. 

I'm grateful for trees, books, grass, hands, skin, sweaters, nature, indoors, heaters and ac. 

 

 

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These are great! Thanks for sharing them. I thought you were thankful for me for a moment because I read trees and books lol. 

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Just now, BooksandTrees said:

These are great! Thanks for sharing them. I thought you were thankful for me for a moment because I read trees and books lol. 

Ya I was thinking about your name and put it in there haha. Grateful for you too. Perhaps you and the greater community can weigh in on this: 

I'm kind of getting into drawing, but I also think about doing poetry and writing fantasy novels. The drawing's good for work because I do art therapy. But poetry and writing have meetup groups I could go checkout. Is it best to just stick with drawing or would it be better to try to do two or even three artistic hobbies? I feel like just one can take up hours a day so I feel like maybe it's best to just draw. I could join the Japanese speaking meetup or the anime meetup even though they're an hour drive away I could probably find people who like anime drawings there. Unfortunately there isn't an anime or even a drawing meetup near me. 

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1 hour ago, Erik2.0 said:

I think like a muscle I am and will slowly get stronger at handling more of the things that cause me anxiety. Eventually I'll be so strong I'll be able to do the things that once caused anxiety with ease. For now it's a struggle. I feel like giving up sometimes... I don't want to quit or give up. I want to keep going.

The truth 100% right here^^^ This is the good fight. Thank you.

Also your art is dope! I can tell you've put a lot of work to in the past. 

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1 hour ago, Erik2.0 said:

Ya I was thinking about your name and put it in there haha. Grateful for you too. Perhaps you and the greater community can weigh in on this: 

I'm kind of getting into drawing, but I also think about doing poetry and writing fantasy novels. The drawing's good for work because I do art therapy. But poetry and writing have meetup groups I could go checkout. Is it best to just stick with drawing or would it be better to try to do two or even three artistic hobbies? I feel like just one can take up hours a day so I feel like maybe it's best to just draw. I could join the Japanese speaking meetup or the anime meetup even though they're an hour drive away I could probably find people who like anime drawings there. Unfortunately there isn't an anime or even a drawing meetup near me. 

You should do every thing you mentioned here and see which one you like the most and stick to it. You might like all of them. This could be your opportunity to express yourself through art and writing while in a community. You could make new friends. 

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Day 77 NF 48 Np 31 Med 17

@DaBest, Thank you! I did just watch and draw what I saw for a while before looking for tutorials. We'll see how it goes with struggling through anxiety. Good luck to you dealing with your own struggles as well.

@BooksandTrees I could make new friends at all those interests. I'm actually feeling willing to drive an hour for a meetup because a lot of meetups are an hour away in the nearest cities. I would never have come close to getting the resolve to make that kind of a trip to try and make friends when I was gaming. Yay. 

Oh man I ate two 'impossible whoppers' that was a mistake! Don't eat fast food! It's poison! UGH. Well. I feel fat. I'm going to try to get more serious about reducing my caloric intake to try to get down to 9% or less body fat. I like being really lean. I may even try to get to below 8%. I think 6-8% would be max though. Right now I'm at around 10%. Oh wow today was crazy with my clients mom going off for an hour about how he was lazy and needed to get off his screens. He doesn't really live too much in the real world. He sort of checks out on his games for many hours a day. It's sad to see and I know it's a huge uphill battle if he gets off the games and tries to do real life stuff. I can't make him want to quit though he's in deep and doesn't want to stop gaming. All I can really do is a be like a friend and offer what help I can.

So....poetry and fantasy meetups are about a 30 minute drive. Anime and Japanese meetups are a 1 hour drive. Maybe I better start with the closer meetups. I've been watching like 1.5-3 hours of anime a day with clients. My eyes are like (@[email protected]). And my brain is all (^___^) . . . ( ' _ ' ). Wa ta shi wa ni hong go ga sko shi wa kari mas. (I speak a little Japanese). 

Yeah I feel so zonked out after that meeting and gross food that I'm just at a loss right now. I don't feel like doing anything. I think I'm going to watch the GQ socialize videos. I completed respawn yay. 

We have some videos on making friends here. <-----------gamequitters videos on socializing.

I accomplished getting through over an hour of family therapy today. PHEW.

I am grateful for my feet, shoes, toenails, fingers, wrinkles, smiles, happiness, relaxing, pores, flaws, and gratitude. 

God bless

Erik

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Day 78 NF 49 Np 32 Med 18

I'm going to start trying to go vegetarian. I think it will be good for my energy, recovery and performance. I've been working on assertiveness skills. It's going well. My group therapy is helping as uncomfortable as it may be at times. So is my job. 

I accomplished getting a haircut and working out.

I'm grateful for my Mac, haircut, gym, therapy, psychology, my new residency status, reading, veganism, vegetarianism, and documentaries.

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44 minutes ago, Erik2.0 said:

Day 78 NF 49 Np 32 Med 18

I'm going to start trying to go vegetarian. I think it will be good for my energy, recovery and performance. I've been working on assertiveness skills. It's going well. My group therapy is helping as uncomfortable as it may be at times. So is my job. 

I accomplished getting a haircut and working out.

I'm grateful for my Mac, haircut, gym, therapy, psychology, my new residency status, reading, veganism, vegetarianism, and documentaries.

Do your research with the meals. I tried being vegetarian for 3 months last year and this year and I had such poor energy and mood swings. I couldn't stick with it.

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Day 79 NF 50 Np 33 Med 19

@BooksandTrees I am hoping to see increased energy. I'm looking to keep carb/protein/fat levels adequate. That's my plan and we'll see how it goes. I ate two meals no meat today and felt more energetic. It'll take me some time to figure out how to cook staple foods and try full vegetarianism though. 2 meals a day is the goal for now.

I got all agitated and angry after the gym today. I think it was shadow boxing and not doing as much yoga as I'd like. Honestly when I don't shadow box though I Don't need as much yoga to clam down. It makes me want to stop shadow boxing or training martial arts at all honestly. I don't like getting aggressive. Even if it means my self defense skills take a hit as I just lift, yoga and cardio. I'm glad to see my training is continuing and I hope to get below 9% body fat by mid April. I just want to have visible abs and not much fat showing. 🙂 . I'm learning about self-compassion / Hakomi therapy. It's great stuff. Really helps a lot with getting over anxiety and having an overactive inner critic. Take it easy on yourselves.

I accomplished drinking over a liter of water today.

I am grateful for ice cream, gadgets, novelty, hakomi therapy, self-compassion meditation, buddhism, christianity, my mom, the gym, chairs and table plants.

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Day 81 NF 52 Np 35 Med 21

I forgot to post yesterday for the first time! That means I’ve been very consistent which is awesome. Also I’ve been a little loopy since starting a new med so that might’ve caused some wires to get crossed. Anyways I’m happy to be back posting again! I love these forums they’re really giving me my life back. Like the journal says, it’s a better life 🙂 

 

Vegetarian day two the struggle is real. Trying to get enough food and all is taking some effort but I think I’ll be okay. I got groceries. I’m feeling much better on this buspar anti anxiety medication. Work is okay and I’m DOING WHATEVER IT TAKES to get out join groups and make friends. The most recent gamequitters podcast said to do that so I’m going for it. God help me! I’ll do it. 
 

there is so much knowledge books podcasts hobbies and people to enjoy connecting with I look forward to it all. I liked the tip to give more than you take too. Like setting up times to meet and stuff . Okay thanks for reading.

I accomplished eating veg all day and tracking protein 

I’m grateful for tzatziki avocado spinach tomato onion veg burger fridge new pan wood floor and yoga.

God bless

Erik

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Day 82 NF 53 Np 36 Med 22

I'm an omnivore again. That didn't last long. I was just getting unsatisfied hungry feelings that weren't going away no matter how much veg food I ate. I went to church today. It was sort of cool, but I felt a little irritated with a mild headache after. I'm going to try it again and see if it'll fit better this time. If I'm just irritable and headache again then I guess it's back to the drawing board -_- . Between meetups of Japanese, poetry, fantasy writing, hiking, meditation, and anime. I think fantasy, hiking and meditation can work. I'll try to go to one group in the next two weeks. It's important for me to get out and socialize. Idk if you can tell, but I was kind of manic my last couple posts from a new medication I was on called Buspar. So now I'm back on my old med regime and I'm feeling more stable. Another work week comes starting tomorrow. I want a vacation. My job is kind of tiresome man phew. 

I accomplished eating at home all day.

I am grateful for my sleep book, water bottle, water, necklace, keychain, Jesus, headphones,  oath bringer, cell phone, and wallet.

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2 hours ago, Erik2.0 said:

Day 82 NF 53 Np 36 Med 22

I'm an omnivore again. That didn't last long. I was just getting unsatisfied hungry feelings that weren't going away no matter how much veg food I ate. I went to church today. It was sort of cool, but I felt a little irritated with a mild headache after. I'm going to try it again and see if it'll fit better this time. If I'm just irritable and headache again then I guess it's back to the drawing board -_- . Between meetups of Japanese, poetry, fantasy writing, hiking, meditation, and anime. I think fantasy, hiking and meditation can work. I'll try to go to one group in the next two weeks. It's important for me to get out and socialize. Idk if you can tell, but I was kind of manic my last couple posts from a new medication I was on called Buspar. So now I'm back on my old med regime and I'm feeling more stable. Another work week comes starting tomorrow. I want a vacation. My job is kind of tiresome man phew. 

I accomplished eating at home all day.

I am grateful for my sleep book, water bottle, water, necklace, keychain, Jesus, headphones,  oath bringer, cell phone, and wallet.

I tried being vegetarian for 3 months and had no energy and honestly hated it. I tried tons of different recipes and just felt bad the whole time.

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Day 83 NF 54 Np 37 Med 23

Repetition is the strength of life. It also can get . . . repetitive. I was repping 135 for 3x7. It was nice. I'm not lifting a lot of weight yet, but I'm able to do all the lifts and feel like I can increase without the joints being compromised. I can't do OHP, but that's fine as I plan to do dumbbell military press instead. I feel better after doing respawn. I put my goals up on the wall and look at the sometimes. Learning Japanese is going well. Oh, I feel much better since I went back to my original meds of risperdal and bupropion only. Much more stable, not hyper or hypo aroused. I'm learning about buddhism in therapy and that's kind of nice. It's got me spending time sending love to myself and others. Seemed to help at subway today. I'm kind of teetering on the edge of actually spending time reading and. writing fantasy or penciling hiking into my schedule. Ah I've got to just pick one and go for it and see what happens. It's scary, uncomfortable and unprecedented. But I saw someones post on here that said just outside your comfort zone is where the magic happens. So maybe I can enjoy making some magic happen with fantasEeeEEee.

I met an award winning poet today. Too bad he was leaving he could've taught me how to do poetry. Oh well. My sleep better book is going well. I just feel like I want more focus for my time after work and gym. I usually come home, post on here, meditate, read something or watch YouTube and sleep. I'd like it to be reading the same thing every night so I can make progress on something or even watching the same thing. Ugh forget watching stuff thought because I watch 1-3 hours of tv with clients a day sometimes. Usually it's around 1 hour. But even that much is plenty of tv for my taste plus the screen time posting here is enough. I don't really need to be on YouTube during the weekdays. Man I feel much more coherent and clear headed today. I was really off the past few days. 

SoOo, probably just read my schoolbook till posts are done for the week, then sleep book and fantasy book. We'll put them in say 25/5 minute intervals? based on 'the science of breaks' >> https://open.buffer.com/science-taking-breaks-at-work/ 

Use your free time in work/break intervals. Your life will feel much more productive and refreshed. No more groggy feeling while sitting around. Go find a break interval on that website that suits you. 

I've been listening to 

It's pretty good. He makes me want to do an art hobby as he describes his ideal hobbies as: coding, photography, music, exercise, and learning a new language. I'm doing bodybuilding/cardio/yoga, some martial arts/weapons training, learning Japanese, I'm learning coping so that's one letter off coding (haha) and something comparable to photography and music for me would be writing fantasy because writing is a fine art as well. I kind of didn't feel as inclined toward poetry because Idk I just tried it and felt kind of dead in the water. Like I was trying to dog paddle upstream with no idea how to swim. Maybe it'll come back around some other time. Maybe it's like vegetarianism and it was doomed to fail from the start, hehe. Speaking of which I was totally drained today trying to work and although I'd eating plenty of vegetarian food/protein in the day I hadn't had meat. My client commented, "You seem SO DEAD right now." To which I replied by eating one of his hot dogs he was trying to use for fish bait. Suddenly I became talkative and joked around with him. He was amazed. I thought maybe I better eat some turkey bacon for breakfast to include meat in my morning meals too if it makes this big a difference in my energy levels. Alright that was enjoyable, thanks for reading.

God bless

Erik

I accomplished hitting upper body at the gym. 135x3x7 on bench! Ya! 6 months of unhampered progress and I could be doing 225! Muahaha. 

I am grateful for my clients, their parents, family, god, buddha, quan yin, therapy books, manga, anime, Japanese sword fighting, wooden shelves, and interior design.

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22 hours ago, BooksandTrees said:

I tried being vegetarian for 3 months and had no energy and honestly hated it. I tried tons of different recipes and just felt bad the whole time.

Two of my friends are veg and I still feel okay saying, forget being vegetarian. It just doesn't work for some people, including me and looks like you too. How is yoga? Do you ever do vinyasa classes or just Kundalini? That's cool you do Kundalini btw, it seems like it would be really refreshing energetically as it's more meditative than the flow or even yin yoga.

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Day 84 NF 55 Np 38 Med 24

I felt so tired today I couldn’t do my full workout. Thankfully I don’t work much tomorrow so that’s nice. I hope my sleep improves so I can have the energy to handle more work, get licensed and make my mom happy. 
 

I accomplished taking steps to tape over the lights in my room for sleep.

i am grateful for duct tape, red blue white black gray silver mouse mousepad and notebooks.

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20 minutes ago, Erik2.0 said:

Day 84 NF 55 Np 38 Med 24

I felt so tired today I couldn’t do my full workout. Thankfully I don’t work much tomorrow so that’s nice. I hope my sleep improves so I can have the energy to handle more work, get licensed and make my mom happy. 
 

I accomplished taking steps to tape over the lights in my room for sleep.

i am grateful for duct tape, red blue white black gray silver mouse mousepad and notebooks.

Why duct tape? That's so random lol

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Haha I was using duct tape to tape over the lights in my room to make it darker when I did last nights post. I generally like using duct tape to fix things too. 

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Day 85 NF 56 Np 39 Med 25

Yay I'm coming up on 90 days again. I was listening to the episode one podcast for gaming the system. It's pretty good and entertaining. Relevant information for us. Today was mostly a day off for me. I'm still rolling around in my head trying to pick a hobby. On the podcast they recommended to pick a hobby then try to branch out to groups. I'm sort of doing a little of each hobby and then trying out the groups. I guess I'll see if one of the hobbies sticks. But, continuing to try them all is kind of a merry go round for now. I've got some posting to do for my school. I'm going to start getting up earlier and only laying in bed for 8.5 hours a night. I think staying in bed 11 hours a night isn't right for me. It was probably a neurotic behavior. My therapy group helped me see this.

I accomplished going to group supervision and therapy. Even if I wasn't perfect in them. 

I'm grateful for my self compassion book, reiki, meditation, buddha, buddhism, christ, dinosaurs, Brandon Sanderson, fantasy books, and Robert Jordan.

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Day 86 NF 57 Np 40 Med 26

I got up at 7am today. As opposed to 930am. That's pretty big for me. I'm looking to go to fantasy writing, anime and poetry meetups in the future. I felt kind of bored today as I didn't work much. It made me think about gaming. I think I'm going to go to peets coffee and read or watch YouTube there after this just to be around other people. I spent a lot of time by myself indoors today and it just felt kind of isolated. I got some herbal tea to drink because I don't drink sugar or caffeine. It's nice to drink something other than plain water for once. 🙂 

I accomplished finishing the work week with a client.

I am grateful for herbal tea, clean water, letters, words, sentences, writing, paper, pages, ink, and the printing press.

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