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Icandothis

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17 hours ago, Icandothis said:

Day 22 things are going. I finished 2nd book since I quit gaming. The name was “the curious incident of the dog in the nighttime”. I really enjoyed this book and enjoy reading very much as well. But I almost feel as if I am using all these hobbies as an escape just as I did gaming. I need to think more about this. 

What was beautiful about my day my kids!!!! 😊😊😊😊😊

What was the first book?

The same thing has been on my mind recently as well. I read this up on the MMM blog somewhere: "Do what is good for you, not what you enjoy."

What I did was to try and triangulate the least useful activity that I do and try to find something more useful, perhaps something I was putting off. It's annoying, but it's the same as with triangulating gaming and deciding something else is worth it more.

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On 10/11/2019 at 8:20 AM, Ikar said:

What was the first book?

The same thing has been on my mind recently as well. I read this up on the MMM blog somewhere: "Do what is good for you, not what you enjoy."

What I did was to try and triangulate the least useful activity that I do and try to find something more useful, perhaps something I was putting off. It's annoying, but it's the same as with triangulating gaming and deciding something else is worth it more.

Hi Ikar!

It was a book about a wolf tribe who adopted an abandoned human girl.  One of my girls’ books 😁

Yes I get that point. Someone told me a quote “design your life or someone else will design it for you”. I really need to make a plan about what I WANT and need my life to look like. I have been in reactionary mode for so long. Just sort of stumbling thru life and dealing with it as it comes. Let me say that hasn’t worked out so well!

Have a beautiful day my friend!

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Day 25  well here we are!!! I was wondering the other day if all my games’  groups had kicked me out. Probably so.... I have been missing gaming a lot more then  usual the past couple of days. One breath at a time. 
Thought I would do a quick intro because my demographic is so different then the majority on here. I am 38, mom of 3, live in PNW, US.  I think as you get older, I realize that I have had to change the course of path many times now. This quitting gaming is just another quick detour. 🙂

When I was 26 I suffered from a traumatic brain injury. I had speech and motor impairment. The doctors said I would not recover, but then I learned about neuroplasticity, which I believe is common place now. I was able to fully recover in a couple of years. After this experience, I’ve learned the power of the mind/body/spirit connection and the ability of human beings to whether even the worst of storms. It’s an experience that allows me to get through many tough days. 

I write this journal on my phone, and usually have to cut short when one of my kids get up. Like now!!! 🤷🏻‍♀️

what was beautiful about my day my kids!

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Day 26!!!!!  Most influential book. Eckhart Tolle - Power of Now. 

What was beautiful about my day. My kids and morning meditation. 💙💙💙💙

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On 10/10/2019 at 10:58 PM, Icandothis said:

“the curious incident of the dog in the nighttime”

I love that book! My wife is a psychologist and specialises in autism, so she recommended it to me a couple of years ago. Really amazing read! Glad to see things are going well for you - I'm no expert but I think you're much better off reading than gaming. For a start, a good reading habit is calming, and isn't the huge dopamine injection that gaming can be. That said, I think it's wise to keep an eye on anything you feel yourself doing compulsively 🙂

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Sorry to hear about your brain injury and the affair. I can't imagine what that is like to go through. But I know it is proof that you are strong enough to quit gaming. 

You mentioned mindfulness earlier. I had an issue when quitting video games where I'd try using only willpower, hate, and anger to stay away. I'd hate the video game community, their memes, lifestyle, and myself due to regret of not living a better life and shame of being a failure in my eyes. This lead to anxiety and anger pulled me out of it. It also made me very sick. 

Mindfulness and therapy helped me release my hate and anger. I learned how to recognize my emotions and then change my thoughts. This lead me to investigate why I felt shame and regret instead of using anger to avoid those feelings. I then understood why I played video games as a form of escapism and a safe place to socialize. I realized what I was missing in my life and also why I needed it. Therapy allowed me to be a detective and interrogate myself for answers and understanding how I made decisions. 

This all played into more mindfulness. I could now understand my thoughts, calm my emotions, reduce stress and anxiety, and also appreciate my achievements in life. Most importantly, I gave myself the ability to be in the moment: right here, right now. Anxiety doesn't let you do that. It takes time. 

Good luck on your adventure. This Saturday will be a year without gaming for me. If I can do it then so can you. We all can. 

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20 hours ago, liam said:

I love that book! My wife is a psychologist and specialises in autism, so she recommended it to me a couple of years ago. Really amazing read! Glad to see things are going well for you - I'm no expert but I think you're much better off reading than gaming. For a start, a good reading habit is calming, and isn't the huge dopamine injection that gaming can be. That said, I think it's wise to keep an eye on anything you feel yourself doing compulsively 🙂

Hi!

Thank you for your comment. I found this gem at my local free library down the street! I would recommend to anyone looking for a thought provoking book. 
 

Thank you for the advice. I am in the process of questioning what is true. Does this ring true for me? Does this sit well with my heart. It’s a bit of a journey. 
 

Have a beautiful day my friend. 

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4 hours ago, BooksandTrees said:

Sorry to hear about your brain injury and the affair. I can't imagine what that is like to go through. But I know it is proof that you are strong enough to quit gaming. 

You mentioned mindfulness earlier. I had an issue when quitting video games where I'd try using only willpower, hate, and anger to stay away. I'd hate the video game community, their memes, lifestyle, and myself due to regret of not living a better life and shame of being a failure in my eyes. This lead to anxiety and anger pulled me out of it. It also made me very sick. 

Mindfulness and therapy helped me release my hate and anger. I learned how to recognize my emotions and then change my thoughts. This lead me to investigate why I felt shame and regret instead of using anger to avoid those feelings. I then understood why I played video games as a form of escapism and a safe place to socialize. I realized what I was missing in my life and also why I needed it. Therapy allowed me to be a detective and interrogate myself for answers and understanding how I made decisions. 

This all played into more mindfulness. I could now understand my thoughts, calm my emotions, reduce stress and anxiety, and also appreciate my achievements in life. Most importantly, I gave myself the ability to be in the moment: right here, right now. Anxiety doesn't let you do that. It takes time. 

Good luck on your adventure. This Saturday will be a year without gaming for me. If I can do it then so can you. We all can. 

Hi my friend,

Thank you so much for your comment. It makes me feel seen, heard and validated. 😊 When I first joined this community, I wasn’t quite sure to what expect.... but what I have found is a loving caring place, with people who have a bit of pain, and who are journeying together in compassion. 
I relate to what you are saying with regards to the feeling of shame. I have not written about it here, but when I needed support during some of the hard times in my life, I was met with anger and disdain. I have learned that I have a deep belief that I am worthless. 
Working with different meditation teachers like Jack Kornfield to hold space for the pain, but also hold space for the love and realizing that my heart is big enough to hold all of it. 💙 May I be held in love.  May you be held in love. May we be held in compassion. 
Thank you for your kind words and holding space for so many in this community. 
Have a beautiful day my friend. 

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1 hour ago, Icandothis said:

Hi my friend,

Thank you so much for your comment. It makes me feel seen, heard and validated. 😊 When I first joined this community, I wasn’t quite sure to what expect.... but what I have found is a loving caring place, with people who have a bit of pain, and who are journeying together in compassion. 
I relate to what you are saying with regards to the feeling of shame. I have not written about it here, but when I needed support during some of the hard times in my life, I was met with anger and disdain. I have learned that I have a deep belief that I am worthless. 
Working with different meditation teachers like Jack Kornfield to hold space for the pain, but also hold space for the love and realizing that my heart is big enough to hold all of it. 💙 May I be held in love.  May you be held in love. May we be held in compassion. 
Thank you for your kind words and holding space for so many in this community. 
Have a beautiful day my friend. 

Thank you as well for sharing and the kind words. It's a good community here! We're in a good place. I'll follow along for sure. 

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On 10/13/2019 at 7:23 AM, Icandothis said:

Yes I get that point. Someone told me a quote “design your life or someone else will design it for you”. I really need to make a plan about what I WANT and need my life to look like. I have been in reactionary mode for so long. Just sort of stumbling thru life and dealing with it as it comes. Let me say that hasn’t worked out so well!

🙂  I like that phrase "design your life or someone else will design it for you".  It's very empowering and gives you a sense of control over your life.  We're not subject to fate, by any means.  And yup, I totally understand about stumbling through life and dealing with whatever comes.  One example for me was trying to do too much because that's what I thought was expected of me at my job.  I have since cut back on that, went part-time instead, and now I can use my time off as quality time, or to recuperate from work-place stress.  

Keep up the good work and mindset!  It was great to read your journey so far.  🙂 

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On 10/15/2019 at 9:02 AM, BooksandTrees said:

Thank you as well for sharing and the kind words. It's a good community here! We're in a good place. I'll follow along for sure. 

Thanks my friend!! Have a beautiful day!!

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On 10/16/2019 at 10:21 AM, CornishGameHen said:

🙂  I like that phrase "design your life or someone else will design it for you".  It's very empowering and gives you a sense of control over your life.  We're not subject to fate, by any means.  And yup, I totally understand about stumbling through life and dealing with whatever comes.  One example for me was trying to do too much because that's what I thought was expected of me at my job.  I have since cut back on that, went part-time instead, and now I can use my time off as quality time, or to recuperate from work-place stress.  

Keep up the good work and mindset!  It was great to read your journey so far.  🙂 

Thank you my friend! 
 

We are all learning as we go along, and holding each other up the best we know how. Little steps, one breath at a time. Small changes, which turn into big translations. 😊

Hope you are having a wonderful day!

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One month!!!!!! Woohooo!! Ok so I was looking back to see what day I was on, and then saw that it’s been 1 month!! I can’t even believe it. 
 

I have tried so many times to quit before. So so many times. The only thing that is different now is this community! I love reading your journals, watching your progress, sharing in your success!

 

One big difference I have noticed is that I am not searching for these dopamine hits anymore. I used to game, then go to social media to look for likes, the go to YouTube. Constantly searching for that next rush. Since I have quit gaming I notice that my impulsive actions have gone way down. I have quit social media for a bit... for me it’s a negative influence right now. And urge to incessantly watch videos has decreased as well. 
 

Over all I am much more present. Spending much less time on screens and much more time in real life!

I have not talked much about my spiritually, but I have a deep faith in GOD. My relationship is with him become so much stronger and I feel held and carried during the hard moments of my day. My help comes from the LORD the maker of heaven and earth. 💙💙💙

 

I am going to be switching things up a bit now. I need to focus on some goals to fill in the missing gaps of my life. The main one I am working on right now is community. I am going to come up with some goals to build community, maybe a weekly goal? We will see. 
 

For the first time in so long I feel so much hope. 
 

What was beautiful about my day laughter and tears. Loving hugs and snuggles with my children. 💙💙😊💙

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Congratulations on one-month free of gaming!  🙂  

Glad to see another person on here who looks to the Lord for help!    I can definitely relate that prayer helps me get through life's hurdles.  I also attend a church, and despite it being a new place of worship, the people there have been so friendly and kind.  A month ago, I went to a prayer group and it was really touching to read the prayer requests.  

Good on you for reducing your screen time too!  And I'm wishing the best for goal to build community.  That's a great way to network with other people.  

 

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6 hours ago, Icandothis said:

One month!!!!!! Woohooo!! Ok so I was looking back to see what day I was on, and then saw that it’s been 1 month!! I can’t even believe it. 
 

I have tried so many times to quit before. So so many times. The only thing that is different now is this community! I love reading your journals, watching your progress, sharing in your success!

 

One big difference I have noticed is that I am not searching for these dopamine hits anymore. I used to game, then go to social media to look for likes, the go to YouTube. Constantly searching for that next rush. Since I have quit gaming I notice that my impulsive actions have gone way down. I have quit social media for a bit... for me it’s a negative influence right now. And urge to incessantly watch videos has decreased as well. 
 

Over all I am much more present. Spending much less time on screens and much more time in real life!

I have not talked much about my spiritually, but I have a deep faith in GOD. My relationship is with him become so much stronger and I feel held and carried during the hard moments of my day. My help comes from the LORD the maker of heaven and earth. 💙💙💙

 

I am going to be switching things up a bit now. I need to focus on some goals to fill in the missing gaps of my life. The main one I am working on right now is community. I am going to come up with some goals to build community, maybe a weekly goal? We will see. 
 

For the first time in so long I feel so much hope. 
 

What was beautiful about my day laughter and tears. Loving hugs and snuggles with my children. 💙💙😊💙

Congrats on hitting 30 days! I'm so happy you're feeling hope. Community is very important. This community kickstarted my progress and I found other communities in real life afterwards that have made my life more well rounded. I hope you find some as well! Just be patient because some stick and some don't. Just takes a bit of experimentation. 

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