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Icandothis journal


Icandothis

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On 12/18/2020 at 2:28 AM, Icandothis said:

Hello,

It has been so long since I have been here.

Life has been very confusing. Integrating myself back into my “normal” daily activities has been a challenge. I am emerging into a world that has been extremely impacted by the pandemic; and where I live in PNW, everything is very locked down. 
 

Just one breath at a time. 
 

We have moved to a new home, a block away. It’s bigger... which my girls really love. But it is still next to a forested area. I again, broke down into tears leaving my old apartment... but then a beautiful rainbow appeared. Picture below. 🥰

Still going to acupuncture. My hands and feet are numb from chemo... this could take a year to resolve. 
 

Starting back into my yoga practice! Also practicing daily body scans. 
 

Also, I have removed sugar from my diet. All sugars, honey, maple syrup, agave. I really really struggled with this... but now... over a month out I am feeling really really healthy. I have replace all the sugars with spices, turmeric/black pepper/cinnamon and a ton of herbs, basil/thyme/rosemary. So delicious. 
 

I miss my very very long hair. I had to cut off 14 inches... and have realized just how attached I was.  
 
My resolution for this year is community. Feeling very isolated, and have started to fall into some not so good patterns. At the same time, I feel more than enough.  Full of love, life and light. Feeling so so so many things right now. 
 

I have missed this forum and hope to be posting more regularly. 
 

Edit: I can't find my rainbow picture. Will post soon.  Sending joy friends!

Hey, I'm also trying to find a good community for me this year as well.  All while going off sugar, which also includes some carbohydrates for me.  I'm super sensitive at the moment.  

Wishing you the best on your journey.  

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  • 4 weeks later...
On 7/21/2021 at 12:21 AM, stablish said:

Should definitely work with this: 

image.png

Does not work if you try to upload to an external provider and then post the link here. We have removed the ability to posts links, because of the spam lately, but figuring a way around this at the moment so it will be possible for long-term members.

Thank you so much! Yet, this did not work for me. Maybe because I am posting from my phone?!

 

Thank you for your help!

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On 7/23/2021 at 12:32 PM, Average_Guy said:

Hey, I'm also trying to find a good community for me this year as well.  All while going off sugar, which also includes some carbohydrates for me.  I'm super sensitive at the moment.  

Wishing you the best on your journey.  

Awwww good luck to you friend! Wishing you the best!

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  • 3 months later...

Happy Monday!

I have missed this forum so much and I am so grateful for you all. Some things I have been celebrating recently:

Over 2 years game free! I could not have done this with you all. 
 

21 months cancer free. Who knew at the beginning of all this I would be dx with stage III cancer. Just had a scan and it came back clear!  
 

3 months being able to financially support myself and kids.

 

I have been told that after trauma you feel lost and confused, lose sense of self and how to show up in the world. I am slowly healing, feeling all the magic that once was. Feeling my breath, my heartbeat, the blood in my body. How to feel alive. 
 

Sending love to all of you and hope this community has a very happy holidays. 

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1 hour ago, Icandothis said:

Happy Monday!

I have missed this forum so much and I am so grateful for you all. Some things I have been celebrating recently:

Over 2 years game free! I could not have done this with you all. 
 

21 months cancer free. Who knew at the beginning of all this I would be dx with stage III cancer. Just had a scan and it came back clear!  
 

3 months being able to financially support myself and kids.

 

I have been told that after trauma you feel lost and confused, lose sense of self and how to show up in the world. I am slowly healing, feeling all the magic that once was. Feeling my breath, my heartbeat, the blood in my body. How to feel alive. 
 

Sending love to all of you and hope this community has a very happy holidays. 

Perfect! Happy to hear from you and to read you are making progress. Have a meaningful 2022!

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2 hours ago, Icandothis said:

3 months being able to financially support myself and kids.

 

I have been told that after trauma you feel lost and confused, lose sense of self and how to show up in the world. I am slowly healing, feeling all the magic that once was. Feeling my breath, my heartbeat, the blood in my body. How to feel alive. 
 

Sending love to all of you and hope this community has a very happy holidays. 

That's great news. I'm assuming it's the 4 of you now and you're out of that situation? Congratulations on being very determined and never giving up. The world is a better place now for you and your children. 

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Thank you all. 
 

Yes, it’s me and the kids. I am dating someone now so that is nice. 
 

*** I have been reading some of your threads about dating, trying to figure men out… lol. And when it comes to romantic relationships I still can’t****
 

Wishing everyone a joyful day!

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14 hours ago, Icandothis said:

Thank you all. 
 

Yes, it’s me and the kids. I am dating someone now so that is nice. 
 

*** I have been reading some of your threads about dating, trying to figure men out… lol. And when it comes to romantic relationships I still can’t****
 

Wishing everyone a joyful day!

Good job! Just be patient, be yourself, and put your morals and goals for yourself and children first and you'll meet the right guy who lines up with those ideals.

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  • 3 weeks later...

:41_pensive:  ..Oh my gosh, just saw this.  I'm still fairly new here, but will be praying for you and hoping you heal fully 100%...!!!  omg..So many people I know with cancer these days, and had a scare myself last year.  Trying to cut out soy, all bad hair care stuff/chemicals and take lugol's iodine lately in hopes of protection.  Keep going and stay strong!

Edited by The_Creative_Quitter
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On 1/12/2022 at 6:43 PM, Icandothis said:


Well tomorrow is the day!!! 22 mos after dx is finally here, and I am able to get my port out!

 

So many emotions, and I find it really hard to share good news with my cancer community as so many are still in the battle.

Have a beautiful day friends.

 

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Congratulations on this incredible step! I'm so happy for you. You've gained emotional and relationship independence, lifestyle independence with quitting video games and now health independence with surviving cancer. Great job!

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Oh and If you need advice on men, I can't help, I'm weird. lol

When it comes to dating, I don't play the seduction game anymore. I just be myself and treat the other person as a unique human being that I genuiely want to discover. Simple enough and it works. In the past 6 months I've been with the most amazing people. It all started to happen when I finally said YES to life and took another step towards fully loving myself, trusting that the the right people will cross my path. Vibe your tribe they say.

P.S. you're cute

Edited by Nico Indigo
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  • 4 weeks later...

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