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Day 1: 

 

So today I restarted the respawn detox since I have had a small period of a few days with relapse and I have now come back again. Deleted my steam account or set it up for it so I gotta wait 30 days again. This time I will make it happen. 

I bought some rockclimbing shoes again so I dont have to borrow the climbing clubs old wornout shoes. I got some pretty good ones with the level of climbing I can do right now.

Funny thing about picking shoes for climbing is that if the shoe fits or feels comfortable, then its not a good choice in size. You usually have to get then 1 or 2 sizes smaller than you use with your regular shoes so that your feet wont slip out of the shoe. Also they have to make your toes crimb so the joints wont be able to bent backwards too much. The distal joints of the toes ?

I also have begun to try and teach myself russian through a website with free lessons. My goal is to write at least 5 russian sentences a day short or long. I also gonna by a Danish /Russian dictionary. The reason why I am learning russian is because I think its an awesome language, and the use of a whole other alphabet makes it even more exciting. ? 

 

BTW does anyone know how to delete old dairies or topics, just so the my failed journals dont have to take up space here :)??

 

Good day to everyone out there ?

 

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4 hours ago, DrivingGoat said:

Well done for getting back up!

I've never tried climbing but I've always liked the idea of it. What's it like?

Hey there Driving goat ? 

 

Its a whole lot of fun really. What I do and have done the most is called bouldering, which is at low hights up to about 3 or 4 meters at most and without ropes or security. Just massive madresses on the floor. 

But since I am very untrained right now in my arms and I wheigh 120 kg. I only really do the easiest, almost easiest and rarely low medium difficulty routes or bouldering problems as they are called in the climbing lingo ? 

But its a sport that kinda lets you get that feeling of accomplishment quite often, every time a problem or route is solved ? So you get to see and feel your progress easily ?

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Day 2:

 

Extremely tough day today...

Everything seems to go or get in my way today. The weather is bad, I have zero drive for working out, I just woke up from a midday nap completily disoriented and groggy. All I really want to do is to say fuck it and just relax with some JWE which even worse doesnt take more than 10 minutes to install ? havent done it yet but it is soooo close. I hate this feeling so bad ? 

I just want to feel good and empowered and motivated again. Not that I dont think there is anything I can do about it myself but I havent felt this bad for a long time... So its not easy to pull myself by the neck but durable ?

 

Good day people ?

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We all feels the same, bro. The way that helps me in critical moments is to imagine myself in 10 years, playing without restraint in the game. Then I imagine myself after the same period of time, but not playing - developing myself in selected areas (in your case fluent in Russian :). Feel it, go this path. You are less addicted every day. We can do it!
As for climbing shoes, I bought shoes that seemed slightly cramped when I bought. After 3-4 hours on the feet, they still hurt. How long does it take for them to go?

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Hey again Chi ?

 

Thanks that helps alot and I am doing better now again. I would rather invest in myself and Real skills than just games:) 

as for the shoes.. they are somehow supposed to always make the feet hurt. But not with that purpose ? it just means that the feet are stuffed in there nicely. I never Got used to wearing my old climbing shoes for longer periods of time. So What I did and do is to take Them of between routes or problems ? so you Will give your feet a break ? 

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6 hours ago, The radtech said:

Hey there Driving goat ? 

 

Its a whole lot of fun really. What I do and have done the most is called bouldering, which is at low hights up to about 3 or 4 meters at most and without ropes or security. Just massive madresses on the floor. 

But since I am very untrained right now in my arms and I wheigh 120 kg. I only really do the easiest, almost easiest and rarely low medium difficulty routes or bouldering problems as they are called in the climbing lingo ? 

But its a sport that kinda lets you get that feeling of accomplishment quite often, every time a problem or route is solved ? So you get to see and feel your progress easily ?

Sounds like a great activity! Will try it. Thanks for the insight

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Day 3:

no gaming today

got my dictionary ? 

ordered the book ‘the power of habit’ as recommended by Cam ? 

 

good Day 2 u ? 

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Day 4: 

 

Had by Best friend over for dinner today. It was Awesome having him visit. Ever since I moved away from my hometown I havent had money or time to see my friends on a regular basis as I used to so Thats really Nice. Later we are going to watch Godzilla 2 in the Cinema ?????  

 

Have had a few cravings today, but only just cravings for buying Minecraft on tablet since it’s cheap and sounded fun. But I won’t give in ???

 

Nice Che day and weekends lads n’ gals ? 

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Day 5:

 

Been having no energy today what so ever.... 

Its Sunday, I have no plans, no energy and its a sunny nice weather today..

I want to get outside so I dont miss out on the nice weather but I am still staying inside, doing nothing. This ofcourse makes it only harder to not give into gaming again. Though it helps to write in this journal. 

I wonder, what do you guys do to grab yourselves by the neck and force yourselves to get things done, the things you dont have any "energy" to do ??.

I can watch all the motivating videos there is and get pumped, but once the endorphins or dopamines disappears, the motivation is gone with the wind...

 

I used to be and outdoors guy before I started gaming and I want that back but now its not enough get my outside ?

 

G'day ? мы видим

 

 

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15 hours ago, The radtech said:

what do you guys do to grab yourselves by the neck and force yourselves to get things done

Motivation doesn't come by itself. Your metaphor is perfect, you have to grab yourself by the neck, because YOU are your motivation. You have to find what is it that makes you get out of bed everyday, and only you can do that. No one can point out it for you. There has to be something. You know it's not video games, else you wouldn't be here. I like to use Simon Sinek's phrasing, even though it's taken from an analogous, but different issue: he says "find your WHY". It's not what you do and how you do it that will motivate you. It's WHY.

Is there something around you that you want to change? Maybe there's something on your house that you would like to fix but never quite found the time. Maybe there's something about you that you would like to change. Maybe something on your neighborhood... Start with what's around you, within your reach, and do it. Make a plan, rationalize what you need to make it through, schedule your actions, measure progress, change the course of action when there's no result, keep the course of action when t gives results. Be methodical, deliberate and don't worry about making mistakes.

And remember, effective change comes with small and incremental steps. Not big leaps, not now-and-then action, those will most likely set you back to the zero square sooner or later. Small and incremental. The most radical thing you have already done, which is: you decided you want to change. From here you can go everywhere.

Find your why, and take deliberate action on it with small and incremental steps. That's what I've been doing for myself, and it is working. Hope it helps.

Stay strong.

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Day 6:

 

Been a good day today, previous days advices where usefull thanks ?

Got up at 5 am and went down to the gym for an hour before going to school. Just on the eliptical to get my heartrate up for some time.

Also startet to check out my calorie intake from today, which i didnt do before just to see how much i actually take in of cals. It shows that even with the extra "gained" calories from my workout I still over eat 200 calories so i am deffinantly going to cut in the food intake as well starting to eat more greens and 2 pieces of fruit a day tops.

My lower back has been complaining the entire on the other hand ? Its an issue that comes and goes over the last 2 years, and I have been going to a doctor 3 times for the back pains. But its weird because once i workout the pain disappears for some time. Almost like standing stil makes my muscles rusty ? 

 

Good Day people ?

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Day 7: 

 

Really good day I had.

Went to a concert with some good ol' friends of mine from my birthtown. Loved it. We went and saw Tenacious D!!! 

Really good show. But we had only tickets for standing spots, so halfway into the concert my feet and knees were killing me :)as well as my back :D

 

Good day lads and gals :)

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Day 8: 

 

Today has been okay. We started our work on our mini bachelor project for our 5th semester exam. Me and my Darling went out to eat some Good asian food with another couple today. Tasted awesome.

 

Havent really had any cravings today ? 

 

my book is comming tomorrow ??? 

 

Nice days ? 

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Day 9-10: 

 

I have been doing a lot of work with my studygroup on our mini-bachelor. Its been farely Good although I have a very hard time getting through with my words. It feels like the other three are doing most of the idea and writing. That makes me feel kind of useless really and it’s demotivating. So I hope to get some theory done this weekend for the project. 

 

Today, Friday 12 pm I went to the half yearly Radiographers party which is always a blast and good fun. But today I felt that I had a very difficult time finding words or finding something to talk about with other people. I feel so damn awkward while talking to somebody and trying to keep a conversation going. 

 

The positive things of the day is that I now got all my books.

The power of habit as suggested by Cam. 

 

Mastermind which is a book on how to get better mindset and utilize it for bouldering or any other sports out there. It is very nicely designed as a diary. 

 

And then the danish Russian dictionary so I now started to teach myself Russian as best as possible ? 

 

I hope everything is going well and unhindered for you all. 

 

Good day ?

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2 hours ago, The radtech said:

I feel so damn awkward while talking to somebody and trying to keep a conversation going

It's OK, it gets better with time and practice. At least for me it did. I used to be an introvert, and I still have my moments, but with time I learnt to find joy in social events. Its mostly about feeling the other person and keeping her interested, at least while you are also interested.

Keep rocking, you are doing fine.

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Thx A. ? 

5 hours ago, Ambassador said:

Keep rocking, you are doing fine.

I hope it will. I will ofcourse also keep working at it as I don’t believe it will come by itself. The thing about it that is the most sad is that before I began to game the 2nd time before this time quitting. I had no trouble talking to anyone at all. Every time I went out with someone new I was the one keeping the conversation rolling sometimes and I had a lot of people I was talking to. Now after I moved to another city with my girlfriend I have had a hard time keeping contact with those people. Only a very few handful of people I still have contact with. The ones that are at my school also feels more like colleagues since we all have our own lives and social circles. So for me I think that the isolation from my friends and me starting to game again, resulted in a very big loss in social skills and self confidence.  

 

But since I started to quit gaming again I feel like it is coming back in very small portions, and still sometimes or some days not at all ? 

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Day 11:

Today I am just going to get some theory written down for our project and is it going better even though it started out pretty overwhelming.

I actually dont have any cravings lately since I started the project, and thats good. I am looking to see how bad the craving can be when the summer holidays comes. If I can fight them if they come ? 

This summer is going to, preferably, spend on making new habits. It takes about 66 days to create a new habit and I got just about two months to that. With all the time every day through summer I am not going to have any plans really. Thats why I aim to hit the gym every day 6/7 days a week and the 7th in the bouldering center. I am also going to keep studying. I got a lot of lessons that I havent really havent had any attention at so I will read up on those every day. 

MRI imaging, Interventional radiography and Mammograph. 

And ofcourse learning a little russian everyday.

 

Hope everyone is having a goody day today ? 

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