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This is Where I Fight - This is Where Gaming Dies


30_yrs_of_gaming

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Day 65 - Game free!

I’m back home. Work is sending me right back out to a remote locale. Exciting. I will be finishing my detox there. 

Got my laptop back from warranty. Tonight will be a real test, but I have plenty to keep me busy before my flight in the morning.

One day at a time... Have had a few conversations with women that were nice.

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Day 70 - I have never made it this far. Wow. So I’ve been writing poetry every other day for the past two weeks. I’m getting perks at work. My ex has no more power over my heart and mind. Making small wins. Sometimes I regress, but overall I’m still getting stronger. 1% changes have ripple effects. Someone reading this needs to go back and catch up on my story for inspiration. If I can then ANYONE can.

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Some thanks are in order from folks here that have showed some interest in me in some way. Thank you. @Ikar, @ElectroNugget, @TimetoWalkAway, @Splitstep, @DaBest, @NannerZ, @George Wyatt, @fawn_xoxo, @asquerade, and anyone else that I may have missed. @Cam Adair, when I get to my 90 day mark, I’d like to give another testimony and list some books and habits that have been helping get through this detox. 

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Hey, 30 years. 

Honestly, I cannot possibly imagine what you're going through right now, but reading your response to everything is incredibly inspiring to me. Many would wilt under that kind of pressure, but you're just pushing through. Kudos to you, good sir. You give me hope. Keep doing what you're doing!

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Day 78 - Wow. Killing it. One day at a time...

You can do this. Whoever you are reading this. Get to a place where you put all your gaming stuff completely beyond your reach. Bury it in the backyard. Whatever...

My success has been largely in part to being physically removed from temptation except for my phone.

Worth considering if you are struggling out there.

Edited by 30_yrs_of_gaming
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Hi, I am Lea. Are you writing poetry? Me too. After I read your last few posts, I am happy that you made progress in your goals. I may not be you, but I can feel the pain you went through with your family issues. Keep up with the good work and don't push yourself too hard. ?

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On 9/4/2019 at 7:53 AM, Lea said:

Hi, I am Lea. Are you writing poetry? Me too. After I read your last few posts, I am happy that you made progress in your goals. I may not be you, but I can feel the pain you went through with your family issues. Keep up with the good work and don't push yourself too hard. ?

Yes, I am writing poetry again after a 13 year famine. I’ve done about a dozen or so in the past several weeks. 

Thank you for reading my story. I hope something I said helps. Sometimes I get too zealous and then I do push too hard. Thanks for the reminder. ?

Edited by 30_yrs_of_gaming
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Day 89 - Game free. 

Well, I’ve been out of town for work a lot these past few months. I have lots of work to do to prepare for winter at home.

This divorce has been a hard hit. Miss my children. 

Going to keep training and leveling up at work. Talking to a new woman that is good at communicating and has similar values. 

My guild mates in a game I’ve played a lot want me to come back. One day at a time...

I’ve changed a lot these past 3 months. I’ve had lots of challenges and feel good about the direction my life is going at this point. Yes, some things are still raw, but I’m having small wins every day. 

Improving my cooking, working out, getting opportunities at work, feel more attractive as a person... 

If I can do this then anyone can. Take courage.

Edited by 30_yrs_of_gaming
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Great job on 90 days. Take some time to reflect in a post in an upcoming day and highlight what you've noticed. My biggest thing was the reduction of brain fog, boost of happiness, less of a mental pull to play games when I had spare time, reduced anxiety, more self awareness, etc.

I didn't start noticing comfort in myself until over 180 days though. I'm still an over thinker, but I am much more calm and appreciate myself and my time more now. 

The greatest thing is I have the ability to leave my house and do something I want to do. I don't feel like I have to game. I don't have to do anything anymore. I can climb, cook, shop, do nothing, hike, play board games, draw, etc. Nothing is holding me anymore. I am free. I hope you get that feeling as well.

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Post 90 Day Detox Notes

How did I succeed on the cusp of such a great personal trial?

1.) Removing all games from my immediate vicinity. 

2.) Choosing to take opportunities to advance at work. 

3.) Making time to engage people whether on this forum, on the phone, or publicly.

4.) Experiences like travel, reading, working out or whatever. Replacing time spent on games with other activities. 

5.) Reflection through prayer, solitude, and quietness. Basically, learning to embrace being alone to some degree.

Thank you @Cam Adair and everyone else for this forum and the inspiration provided in your materials. 

I honestly think I will continue gaming somewhat in the future, but never to the degree that I did before. Life is short and there is so much else to experience.

There are still some huge obstacles that I am facing concerning my personal life, but I have a renewed focus and higher level of self awareness.

I have met a kind woman that communicates well and loves me. I am receiving promotions at my job. I lost myself and found myself all over again. 

Gaming didn’t destroy my life. I was spiraling out of control and fell into gaming heavily because of several other motivators. Now, I see better what led me here and where to go from here. 

There are things we can change and things we cannot change. YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF THE DECISIONS THAT YOU MAKE. Choose wisely. Live without regret by doing the best you can. Enjoy life.

I have been playing games off and on for the past 30 years. I have had times where I did not play for months at a time because of other interests or the demands of life. 

I got out of order. This detox helped me a whole lot, but it’s not a magic formula. It all boils down to the discipline of choices we make every single day. 1% changes have ripple effects that help us and spill over into other people’s lives. 

If I can do this then ANYONE can. I did it in the midst of some great adversity.

Challenge yourself. Get inventive about it. Get angry if you have to. Cry. Be who you are. Embrace the struggle. People here will help you. But YOU have to want this for you. 

Thanks again.

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