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Ikar's Diary


Ikar

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Day 339:

I read the book, took a walk, had a short workout, worked with my team-leader on Forex and saw a webinar on social media in the evening.

I have to say that yesterday and today, I was full of energy. It could be just that I found meaningful stuff to replace the meaningful stuff I would normally do.

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Day 340:

I wrote here, did research into Forex, worked out, took a walk, did Duolingo, read and went to play a board game and have a couple of beers with a few others. I did my homework for the next morning, so I would get up fine.

Day 341:

I got up later than usual, but I got up at a reasonable hour. I took a walk, did a bit of meditation, worked out, read, worked on my blog and did a bit of Forex. I do feel a bit tired now, but I had a lot of heat the past three days.

---

As @James Good pointed out in his VLOG, I also have a hard time working out in my room, but I worked out the past four days regardless, even if all those workouts are shorter than my normal ones at a gym. It works out fine for me to return warmed up from a walk and then work out shortly after. Survive and adapt.

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On 3/24/2020 at 9:04 AM, Ikar said:

From what I was currently able to gather, it is about trading currencies online. I figured I might start learning something new, given this quarantine will be in effect for at least another month.

Not really, it would actually be kind of cool to go on a date in a ghost town 😄

Some romanticism there. You can re-enact those hollywood fantasy films where you meet the (potential) love of your life in a deserted town.

What you said earlier is spot on. I prefer to go into mini-relapses (watching films without any serious daily plan) because It makes me think that I will do better long term, BUT if this sort of mini-relapse thing is from not solving a pressing issue, it becomes systemic. So it is better just to anticipate and solve issues sooner rather than later. 

Regarding working out, I always work out at home and find it a fun activity. But I do agree with you that when you a enter a group there is a lot more peer pressure and desire to perform

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5 hours ago, Amphibian220 said:

Some romanticism there. You can re-enact those hollywood fantasy films where you meet the (potential) love of your life in a deserted town.

What you said earlier is spot on. I prefer to go into mini-relapses (watching films without any serious daily plan) because It makes me think that I will do better long term, BUT if this sort of mini-relapse thing is from not solving a pressing issue, it becomes systemic. So it is better just to anticipate and solve issues sooner rather than later. 

Regarding working out, I always work out at home and find it a fun activity. But I do agree with you that when you a enter a group there is a lot more peer pressure and desire to perform

These days I watch about three episodes of The Expanse a day which is two hours, but I also generally eat during that time. I'm quite happy about my general routine of getting up early (6:30), eating, writing here, Duolingo, perhaps reading a book, overall doing something easy and manageable. At around 10 I can mobilize and get out for a walk/workout and start taking on serious business after noon. I feel I wouldn't be motivated to even get out of bed, if I put in the biggest and most important (most difficult) task of the day right in my face after having breakfast.

I found out that I am completely fine working out on my own, my daily rhythm is actually based around it at this point, so if somebody wanted to join me, they would need to be OK with my time-frame of going there before lunch. I think most of the times, I am in the dormitory gym alone.

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Day 342:

I did a bit of Forex, read, did Duolingo and then cycled to my friend who lives some 15 kilometers away. We mostly chilled, talked to each other and took a walk in the forest. I was a bit peeved, because he spent a lot of time on his phone chatting with his girlfriend, but he noticed that and he told me that I have a bad luck of coming to visit him when he's having more a intense period (pun intended) with her. He seems to be stalwart and knowing what he's doing though. We agreed that there needs to be a degree of discipline in relationships that needs to be upheld. I think things would've gone very differently for me if I knew that two years ago.

Day 343:

I slept over at my friend's. Afterwards, he drove me to pick up my car from the paint shop. It definitely looks better now. I then helped my dad to bring a new TV to my parents' house. Afterwards, I drove to pick up my business cards, banners and then drove to my parents' to visit them after two weeks. It was nice to see them again. I also managed to sell my old bike today. I got home in the evening, had a webinar about geographic information systems and I just chilled for the rest of the day.

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5 hours ago, Ikar said:

Day 342:

I did a bit of Forex, read, did Duolingo and then cycled to my friend who lives some 15 kilometers away. We mostly chilled, talked to each other and took a walk in the forest. I was a bit peeved, because he spent a lot of time on his phone chatting with his girlfriend, but he noticed that and he told me that I have a bad luck of coming to visit him when he's having more a intense period (pun intended) with her. He seems to be stalwart and knowing what he's doing though. We agreed that there needs to be a degree of discipline in relationships that needs to be upheld. I think things would've gone very differently for me if I knew that two years ago.

Day 343:

I slept over at my friend's. Afterwards, he drove me to pick up my car from the paint shop. It definitely looks better now. I then helped my dad to bring a new TV to my parents' house. Afterwards, I drove to pick up my business cards, banners and then drove to my parents' to visit them after two weeks. It was nice to see them again. I also managed to sell my old bike today. I got home in the evening, had a webinar about geographic information systems and I just chilled for the rest of the day.

It's strange reading about you talking to people when I haven't talked to someone in person in about 3 weeks lol. Sounds productive though. 

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7 hours ago, BooksandTrees said:

It's strange reading about you talking to people when I haven't talked to someone in person in about 3 weeks lol. Sounds productive though. 

It depends on each person's individual risk management and circumstances. Getting out there for those two days was both objectively useful and subjectively fun. I obey the law as it is currently in effect (i.e. I do not throw underground parties), so I meet with smaller groups of people and less often than before. One thing I keep in mind is that most of us are probably going to get it, even if in a way that our immune system handles it no problem. We're going to be fine 🙂

Edited by Ikar
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Day 344:

Maintenance day. I did Duolingo, finished "The Red and the Black", cooked a chicken, went for a walk, set up whatever few events for the next week, washed the dishes, cleaned my room, exercised and did the laundry. "The Red and the Black" is an interesting and instructive book. There's ambition, love and psychological warfare.

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Lol I'm with Books, it's been so long since I've seen another human being that I've actually wanted to talk to. Tried chatting with a friend from the other side of the country on Discord but it just felt weird. I've never been the kind of person to talk on the phone, either. I need a face. I wouldn't be talking to people without the social distancing either, though, so it's really not very different. Lol.

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Day 345:

I visited my grandma and my brother after not seeing them for two weeks. It was good to see both of them again. I had a good chat with my grandma and my brother proofread my website and I considered some of his suggestions. I had a light workout (50 pushups and 50 situps) and I attended a uni webinar.

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Day 346:

I did Duolingo, got the laundry from my clotheshorse, did some light editing of my website, watched one video about mindset and one about Forex basics, wrote here, took a walk, exercised, put my banner onto the bars of my dorm window and did some chatting on IG/dating apps.

I think I get a lot of work done these days, even though I sometimes fall into states of mindless autopilot and catch myself doing something inefficiently later on. I woke up a few times at night the past days too, but I am happy I get my daily tasks done. Work hard and play hard.

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17 hours ago, Ikar said:

Day 346:

I did Duolingo, got the laundry from my clotheshorse, did some light editing of my website, watched one video about mindset and one about Forex basics, wrote here, took a walk, exercised, put my banner onto the bars of my dorm window and did some chatting on IG/dating apps.

I think I get a lot of work done these days, even though I sometimes fall into states of mindless autopilot and catch myself doing something inefficiently later on. I woke up a few times at night the past days too, but I am happy I get my daily tasks done. Work hard and play hard.

Nice to see you're being productive. Hopefully it continues. Are you doing another monthly summary? I liked your idea so I focused a summary of mine for the month of March.

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5 hours ago, BooksandTrees said:

Nice to see you're being productive. Hopefully it continues. Are you doing another monthly summary? I liked your idea so I focused a summary of mine for the month of March.

I'm gonna get it done in a few days.

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Day 347:

I got up normally and got a few minor things done, but then I decided to take a nap for a few hours. I took a walk then and did the groceries after a few days, so I am stocked. After that, I  chatted with people on the Internet and did some trades on my Forex demo account. I started reading a Czech book that could translate as "Tactics and Strategies in Love". I enjoy it quite a bit so far. I had a light workout in the evening and went to play chess and chat.

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16 minutes ago, Erik2.0 said:

I like the idea of a monthly summary too. You could save them in a pages/word doc and compare each month to each other. It would be a sweet little summary of your progress on here.

I made backups of my diary on my desktop. I also already compare the months to each other 🙂

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Day 348:

I worked out, read, took a walk, did Duolingo and visited my friend. I helped him sort out some stuff in his flat and I took some of it he no longer needed.

Day 349:

We finished the cleaning process, I cycled back and played desktops in the evening.

---

Since I had a few sleepovers in the past week, it made me realize that it's important to cultivate the ability to be "alone" together, even if the person is visible to you literally the whole day. I think it's a successful cornerstone of any long-term relationship where people share their quarters.

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I'm using the template I used the last time. 7/3/20 - 6/4/20

"L" will stand for the (last) plan for this term. "T" will stand for done this term. "N" will stand for the plan next term.

 

Books:

L: I got "The Red and the Black" from Stendhal and "Beyond Good and Evil" by Nietzsche.

T: I finished "The Red and the Black" from Stendhal. I am currently reading "Tactic and Strategy in Love". It describes all the common types of intimate relationships and I find it practical, helpful and truthful.

N: Finish "Tactic and Strategy in Love" and start reading "Rich Dad Poor Dad" by Kiyosaki.

 

English - Personal + Business:

L: I think I want to bond my personal progression together with my business progression. The idea I would study some obscure English grammar or did tests on the Internet just seems foreign to me. I'll just keep on doing what I've been doing up until now. I'm gonna get my webpage up by mid-March. Word. It's already 50% done anyway. I am also going to spam more mails, even though I think everybody knows that I exist in this area at this point.

T: Sadly, all the English social gatherings that I could attend got cancelled and the courses got either cancelled or delayed as well. I got the website up and running, as well as my business cards and banners.

N: I have an interview coming up and a plan to cooperate with one of my friends in the business during the summer.

 

Family:

L: I think it's true to say that I find my family members more dear when I am more detached from them by living on the dorms. I get to see them just enough to be caught up on what are they up to. I think it works that way for most relationships, except for when people live together.

T: Business as usual. I don't think anyone is freaking out.

N: Maintain the relationships as they are, I'm happy with them as they are.

 

University:

L: Stick to doing assignments ahead of time. There's one bigger one coming up. Otherwise it's fairly smooth sailing during the semester.

T: There's been a few webinars I attended, but so far there is just one big assignment due in a month.

N: I'll try not to be stupid and get it done in a week or two, so I won't have to worry about it.

 

Being social:

L: I am creating more connections and deepening current ones. I like the consistency of that. I can still be a bit sheepish at times though. I like to both talk to others and watch them. I'm vigilant.

T: I think while my time spent being social took a hit, it wasn't as big as I expected it to be. I just meet people in smaller groups and play desktops. 

N: Hard to say, given the current circumstances.

 

Exercise/movement:

L: I did the same pull-up, sit-up and bike routine all month. I'm gonna get into some mobility workout too, because I would like to be more flexible and less prone to injury. I put in some more exercises to mix up my workouts, as well as some stretching. I think I want to make my workouts even more diverse.

T: I exercise in my room now, though for lesser periods of time than before, but I also take walks into the nature more. I try to get both in during the day.

N: Hard to say, given the current circumstances.

 

Russian/German: I am still on track on Duolingo (204 days streak).

 

Forex:

T: A friend got me into trading currencies online two weeks ago and on average, I've been able to spend an hour a day on checking this out. I got the basics of it and so far I fare well on the demo account. I also like the intertwining of it with personal development.

N: I wrote my friend that I am willing to put some 10 hours a week into educating myself on the topic and I'm confident I can manage that. He wrote he is going to help me out hone my IG if I am going to delve into marketing later on.

 

Women/dating:

L: I'm currently talking to a few women. I get myself out there on a regular basis. I'm finding out what I like and what I do not like. It could be that I am still perhaps too rational and shy about this, but I am getting better. It's like entering the swimming pool with a descent. I feel more comfortable initiating conversations with men overall. Be cool with whatever the outcome is. That's how I learn.

T: I am on the dating apps, but I'd prefer just normally going out to meet women. I will probably keep them around after the quarantine is over as passive scanners. I think I have this game and trends figured out.

N: Be cool with whatever the outcome is. That's how I learn.

 

Projects/misc finished last month:

business - got the materials

website (100%)

 

Projects/misc upcoming this month:

money - forex

gun license - on hold, quarantine

get GIS done - university



Thoughts, ideas and additional comments/gratitude:

Spoiler

I think I have done a good job at incorporating psychology lectures I’ve seen/learnt into my life. I don’t want to re-live the experience I’ve had last March/April, because it could be deadly.

I gained the ability to plan after I quit games.

Regained/new daily habits: I clean my teeth daily, Duolingo, journaling, working out.

Life’s more colorful and more difficult to deal with, but at least I can look at myself in the mirror now and see myself less skewed than before.

I think I give meaning to things that deserve it now.

I am not horrified of free time anymore. This is a BIG one.

I am using my sociability more sensibly. No more trolling in Twitch chat and streaming.

Coming to think of it, I’ve never been overly anxious to begin with, just the normal amount. I asked girls out on dates on high school. I was just totally oblivious to the signals I sent/received.

I’m more conscious of both what I do and how I do it in relation with other people. I still get anxiety, but I act despite it. I stand tall and have my say.

I'm very lucky to have a mentor in the field I am excited about.


I EMBRACE THE FACT THAT ANYTHING I START DOING, I WILL DO IT BADLY. I CAN ONLY BECOME BETTER INCREMENTALLY AND BY PRACTICE.

 

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Day 350:

I visited my parents, read, took a walk and did some minor maintenance in my room.

Day 351:

I had a call with my friend regarding our plans for Forex. I read, took a walk, played football and had a party in the evening.

Day 352:

I did a bit of Forex, went for a walk, read, took a nap and wrote.

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1 hour ago, Ikar said:

I am not horrified of free time anymore. This is a BIG one.

This has been my Achilles heel. I think I'm getting better with it through building confidence with newer hobbies. 

 

1 hour ago, Ikar said:

I EMBRACE THE FACT THAT ANYTHING I START DOING, I WILL DO IT BADLY. I CAN ONLY BECOME BETTER INCREMENTALLY AND BY PRACTICE

This is probably the largest component to our success in all honesty. It unlocks more doors for us and promotes self respect and patience. 

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1 hour ago, Ikar said:

I am on the dating apps, but I'd prefer just normally going out to meet women. I will probably keep them around after the quarantine is over as passive scanners. I think I have this game and trends figured out.

Dating apps are something, I really had no success yet. I kinda had two interesting women, I talked to, but then the contact kinda got lost. The fact that I don't have a very big social life right now makes me feel bad sometimes. But I am glad that the dating thing is working great for you! And I just found that previous post, where you explained the forex thing. So now I know. xD

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7 hours ago, Alexanderle said:

Dating apps are something, I really had no success yet. I kinda had two interesting women, I talked to, but then the contact kinda got lost. The fact that I don't have a very big social life right now makes me feel bad sometimes. But I am glad that the dating thing is working great for you! And I just found that previous post, where you explained the forex thing. So now I know. xD

I mean, except for discovering my ex about two years ago, I can't say I got much further than you myself, at least in the past year.

7 hours ago, BooksandTrees said:

This is probably the largest component to our success in all honesty. It unlocks more doors for us and promotes self respect and patience. 

I believe this is what keeps me going on the dating apps. I think I have the dynamics of it figured out, even if I can't take advantage of them under quarantine. I think the main one is to be selected rather than to select. Overall, it's just a matter of time before I start going out on dates regularly.

Edited by Ikar
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13 hours ago, Phoenixking said:

I am so happy to be able to witness your progress and proud to see you do well, yo ^^

Thanks! The same goes to you from me 🙂

Day 353:

I wrote, read, had a call about suggestions for my IG, went for a business meeting, visited my grandma, did a bit of Forex, exercised a bit and played chess in the evening.

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