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Mario's Journal,


WorkInProgress

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Are you starting your day with the most important things you need to do? If not, that's what I would recommend to do to be more efficient getting things done.

A good book to consider right now is The One Thing by Gary W. Keller.

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Awesome job with the running, and surprising yourself with the extra distance too.  Also, that's really cool about speaking English with Tyrone!  BOTH of you are going to learn much from each other, in regards to language, that is for sure.  Excellent!

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@Cam Adair I was always starting in the day with gamequitters did some training and the some reading. Guess I need to be more on point with my prioritisation. And gamequitters is surely better then gaming, but it is still a enjoyable hobby for me, so I think I shift it back in my priorities. First thing I did last two days after this realisation was breakfast-> exercise(30-60min) shower, linux training(30min) -> work 4hours(I set a weekly and monthly goal for the usage of that time). It worked out fine yesterday now I need to keep it up. Bought that book and will start reading it today. I have finished the slight edge the second time so I need new self-development food anyway.

Edited by WorkInProgress
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15.5.2016 (four weeks after detox)

After a really depressing Monday things got better. Got an invitation to present myself for an internship at a international engineering firm in the simulation area and are happy and excited to go there next Tuesday. Also my working project is officially done. I agreed to do some little fixes but I am not obliged to do anything now which is awesome. Had to Use all my working hours from Tuesday to Thursday(Around 17hours) to finish it, but I sat on my ass and did it without anxiety and fear of failure. I just planned my time and said to myself that I do what's doable and finished just in time. This was awesome.

I also read if of the book cam recommended and was really productive over all. If I can keep this attitude up and still be so massively social as last week I would be really happy. People are also recognizing my enhanced physique which wasn't the point of my bodyweight-training(I do it, to stay pain free and be healthy), but was still nice to hear.

The new daily routine works out fine. A key point against my procrastination was not being to strict with myself. I allowed my self in the working periods which I planned, to take as much rest as I wanted to, as long as I didn't entertain myself. This means I was allowed to lie in bed or walk through the apartment as long as I wanted to . But I wasn't allowed to browse,masturbate, train or do anything which would send my brain in a wrong direction. Just working and resting basically. The freedom to rest how much as I want seems to motivate me to do more working which is fine. Especially because I always struggle to follow structured daily plans.

After a talk with my wife I realized that I have to care ,not to become the guy who brags about his training consistency and how awesome he is, all the time. I developed some tendencies in this direction and I don't won't to become that guy.

 

Goals for next week:

- be prepared and get the internship !

- stick to my daily schedule( continue this 4hours of work /workday thing)

- keep exercising

 

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You have a great wife, Mario!  She does not want you to become a braggart of any kind.  But it is okay to be proud of what you've achieved too.  Perhaps there is a healthy balance?  Congrats on your potential internship and I hope it goes well on Tuesday!

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19.5.2016

@Dannigan a balance seems like a good solution. I will work on that.

A few things first.

I stopped counting the days since I started my detox because I think gaming is a chapter i left behind me and it doesn't motivate me either to improve so I don't see the sense. I just stick to the date.

The interview went well and I have two other options which will be maybe possible if I am not a right fit for the company. I will hear from them tomorrow.

Some days I do what I intend to and some times I just lay around all morning watching youtube or just doing nothing. I dropped silently my meditation practice and was slacking at many things. That's why I decided to start the daily journalling again. I feel like I lost focus and just targeted too many different things at once which isn't helpful. Right now I am working on cleaning up the household for real. In my past I actually never did  serious cleaning. In my childhood I was always the little one(I have two older sisters) and had to to pretty much nothing. This leads to me doing superficial cleaning work at best and just don't take it serious. But i promised my wife to clean the apartment before I start with an intern ship(I promised similar things in the past and was never able to stick to my word). That's the reason why it is important for me. First I want to prove to myself that i can clean an apartment in a way everyone thinks it is clean. On the other hand just to show some reliability. I am a nice guy most of the time and have many strengths. But reliability is one of my greatest weaknesses and I feel it is holding me back at work and at home. I see this as one of my biggest obstacles to becoming a good father sometime and it annoys me that my self perception doesn't mirrors the reality there.

Some points where I want to attack this issue.

1) don't promise things you aren't sure you can keep.

2) be honest and reliable anywhere(forum, at home, at work)

3) to accomplish this set goals which are under your capacity and therefore safe to keep

4) go the extra mile if you promised something. Don't stop because i is not comfortable.

5) focus only on a few (1-3) habits you want to establish on a regular basis

Today

Felt tired and not motivated. After listening to a podcast with a gymnastic trainer I still did my workout and did it even besides deciding to pause today because of my dry fingers. It was actually not a problem and went well. After another 2hours of procrastinating I started cleaning and listening to more podcasts. I skipped my linux practice and obviously  didn't meditate. I suspect that my missing focus is a result of dropping meditation or journalling(reflection) or both. I will first do only journalling for 2 weeks (until Thursday 2.6.) then I will re access the situation and add meditation again. But I want to monitor the effects on me these habits have. Well now my cleaning break is over and I go back to clean the bathroom.

Good things I will stick to the next week

- daily journalling

- exercise

- linux practice

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Good to see your daily journaling is back. As I shared with Travis a lot, when we start doing better it's easy for us to stop doing the things that helped us do better in the first place. I describe this as the need to DOUBLE DOWN on the things that are working for us in our life. If journaling contributed to you improving your life, keep doing it! 

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20.5.2016

It is 4:39 and I sit here with decof coffee and reflect about me. guess this will be a great day. I feel more awake today with 6hours of sleep (10pm to 4am) then  with my usual 7-8 hours.  I had to stand up that early because i wanted to do some finishing strikes at my work thing. Today I give it officially over to my successor and I want to simplify things in my code and structure it. I actually learned a lot about coding and matlab at this project so I am really thankful for the opportunity to do this as my side job. Starting it was a great decision.

It is kind of strange to be awake so early. I feel like an alien overachiever. But it is quiet, my wife is still asleep and I have some free time. to just sit in the silent apartment and write my daily reflections. It feels like I overcomplicated things in the past. Just writing without too much goal setting and reflecting on myself will do me a ton of good. I also did 10min of freestyle yoga this morning . I just did some poses I felt like doing and it was nice. I will start a modified mini routine to start in a successful day. I will wake up before my wife. make decof coffee and do 10min yoga. Then I go to the forum and read a bit in some of the journals I follow. Then I will write here to reflect on what comes to my mind. May it be things I accomplished yesterday or challenges that lay ahead of me. This feels great today. I don't know if it is only that good out of coincidence or because it is new but I feel like this could be a key for me personally to win the morning and the day.

I often times failed to do a reliable morning routine because my wife wakes up with me. She usually uses me as snoozebutton(the alarm is on my side of the bed) then I make coffee for us two and she gets ready for work while I sit around without doing to much. Most of the time I clean a bit and help her to make breakfast and then we watch the news from yesterday. This kind of chaotic start makes me often times unfocussed. On the other hand we both enjoy the time we have together in the morning so I am not willing to give this up for a strict routine. I think with standing up an hour earlier I could have time for me and time for us in the morning. I am just a little sceptical about the hour of sleep I will miss on a regular basis. But to try it a week won't hurt me.

Do and correct course after I started!

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21.5.2016

Well to stand up that early isn't an option obviously. I kind waked u my wife several times without noticing and she was really pissed in the morning. I was also pretty tired in the  evening.  IN addition to this did she take next week free. If I want spent some time together I can't stand up at 4am and go to bed at 9pm if she has a 9am-24pm rhytm. Because I didn't stand up immediatly after my cats woke me I dosed away several times this morning and feel now really groggy. I will start with exercising and hope that this will help me to wake up properly. I couldn't clean because I was busy with another application to an internship. The company from my Application at tuesday didn't answer but I have still hope to hear from them next week. We'll see. Today will be another cleaning day. I have the feeling that slowly but surely everything gets done. wish me luck!

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22.5.2016

Yesterday was pretty chilled. After that bad morning I done some exercise and some hours of cleaning but relaxed most of the day with my wife. Was pretty fun and we had a nice time. It is good to see that we can have fun spending quality time as two, and not only as part of a bigger social group. I am thankful that I still like the person I married so much. We are both constantly changing but still in love which is one of the greatest things in my life. Today I had another relaxed morning and did a fast run in the sun. Sadly I struggle a little bit with allergies against polls at that time of the year, but as long as I do sport my body is to distracted to annoy me with red eyes and a running nose. But afterwards i looked for 30min like a high sick person. Well some time indoors now and it is way better. In my youth I couldn't go outside at all without coughing at this time of the year. Now I go running for 35 min. Things turned out well in the end. 

One day at a time!

Lately I wanted a little to much in a short time. Made me less productive overall. I try to be more appreciative of my successes. This will surely help me with my motivation.

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23.5.2015

Yesterday was pretty tiring but fun. We had a befriended couple over for barbecue. That's why I finally cut my lawn with my mechanical mower which was pretty tiring(still feeling my butt a bit this morning :D). I also reorganized the outdoor area of my apartment a bit and now it is looking neat again. My wife was happy about it and I enjoy it personally a lot because I can sit outdoors without looking at a lot of crap. We made Burgers without any ready to use products. I helped making the burger sauce which base was a self made mayonnaise and tasted awesome. Grilled bananas with milk chocolate filling as dessert. Everything turned out great and we had a really nice time in the evening. Only downer was my allergy which kept me snotting away all day. But it rained over night and today I will have a more indoorsy day so it won't be a problem.

I really hope that I get a positive answer so I can start my internship. I am running out of time and without it money is a little short lately. Also I can't start a new side job because I don't know how long I could do it. It is annoying. I guess I try to find a job at an event firm where I can work whenever a greater event in the city and are flexible to work at week ends. I never was in service before  and feel kind of anxious to start something new which would be needless if the company would mail me a positive answer and I could start my internship next month. Well guess would be isn't reliable enough -.- I feel like stomping on the floor and screaming: "But I don't want too!". Guess this isn't an option if you are 8+ years old...

 

 

 

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24.5.2015

Today I feel better. My wife and I talked over the money thing and we actually don't need a side job. But it feels like we need one. Some extra money to buy new clothes and stuff would be most appreciated. This sort of problem is new for me because I had a big savings account from my grand parents to rely on to. But buying my own household and studying for 5 years emptied it pretty neatly and now money problems are reality. But better now then in ten years. I was really careless with my money, because I never thought it would disappear before the end of my studies. Well unplanned things happened and now I am in the monthly fight for black numbers on my savings account. Good university is over soon and ten I will start a new savings account for the future and now I have appreciation for money which is a good thing.

I am lucky it rained the the last 2 days. Now my allergies are way better.

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@Cam Adair

maybe not with ease but with less anxiety for sure ;) I would always choose a great personal self developed me over  a person with a big savings account. Money was never something too important for me but lately I see the uses of it.

For me gaming was in some ways a very cheap hobby. I mean I could entertain myself for thousand of hours with free to play games like Lol and Dota 2 or cheap oldschoolgames like warcraft 3. I was most of the time to cheap to really spend some money on steam or anything. Guess my Swabian roots coming through. Like the Scottish we are proud on our saving abilities ;).

What I didn't realize was that it was a very expensive hobby too. Thousand of hours focussed time, spent on something with little to no benefits for my future life or my personal development.

All that reading of personal development literature helped me too appreciate both more: Time and money. I gone from the abstract idea it is nice to have much free time and many dollars, to the concept that real richness comes from having money to buy the things you need and want, the ability to spent time on things you need and want  and the wisdom to know what you want and need.

PS Exponential growth of improving yourself for 1% every day:

dailywork.thumb.jpg.359c83eaf8fbf315b0b9

Edited by WorkInProgress
found a awesome Pic I wanted to share
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27.5.2016

Didn't have the time yesterday to write an entry. It was a busy and nice day. I worked a bit on my linux programming and worked out. Then we had a family day with her brothers and sisters and tried to make the best burger. we did 3different variations of fully self made burgers. Imagine 4 people cooking and barbecuing at the same time. 8 people plus 3 kids in the age range from 2-7 present. It was fun but kind of exhausting too. My wife and I had a chilled evening after that and sat in our little garden. We both realised how thankful we can be to have such a great life. I am really happy to spent so much quality time with people I love. Her holidays are great, but next week I have to start getting some work done again. I have to get on an actual state with my only course this semester before my intern ship kicks in.

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