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I can’t get over my gaming regrets


willardorwud

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Hello, I can sympathize with you as I have similar regrets. The best advice I can give is to ride it out. Regret, like all emotions, passes with time. In the meantime, engage in activities that you can be proud of to replace gaming.

One other thing you can do to try to trick yourself if you really need a way through it is to tell yourself that maybe one day, when you can play games again without feeling like they're pulling you in uncontrollably, you'll go through those games. That day will come and you will probably tell yourself that you don't even care anymore at that time. Telling yourself that you'll play those games one day may help to relieve the feelings of regret.

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  • 6 months later...

I have an idea about this, that some other may point out as a bad idea, so I'm open to criticism. After deleting my gamesaves yesterday, I was thinking about how I'd miss some specific games, so I would never have "contact" with some stories and worlds again, or with some experiences or places that I'll never meet.

So I began to reflect on which of these things I could achieve in life with any equivalent activity. For example, if I'm never to play a racing game again, I can go karting. I am a competitive person, and the adrenaline of racing and competing with my friends while my whole body is involved is something else. Of course, some things we can't replicate: I really like the GTA series, and most of the actions featured in the game are awful, terrible and illegal, but I really liked how the games featured its cities. So, going to the biggest city nearby (Rio, which is a great city to visit, I must admit), driving in highway listening to good (old, or maybe not) music, hanging out and discovering new places could help me to get the same good emotions I had with the game.

Some other activities are:

  • Playing an RPG (not an electronic one, but in real life, with friends, together around a table) - this one I need to know your opinions, is it a good idea?
  • Playing a sport - specially the sports that you miss to play electronically, at least if it is possible (well, I'll never be able to play American Football or drive in Formula One, but Flag Football and Karting are good options)
  • Having contact with pets. Or even with wild animals, in parks or zoos maybe.
  • Learning how to play the guitar or the keyboard/piano, or any other instrument. This will keep your fingers busy, and it's a special one for those who like Guitar Hero.
  • Practicing a martial art. This one is for those who enjoy fighting games. Why not try by yourself. You'll develop a skill that you'll never forget, and that will be deep inside your skin.
  • Playing paintball or softball. This one is trivial.
  • Reading a sci-fi or fantasy book. Well, we'll never find something like driving a spaceship or doing some magic against a dragon in real life. But when you begin to develop the habit of reading, at least if you read good books, books will become more interesting than games. I was reading a good book some time ago, and started to play a game that is based in another book. While playing this game, a thought came to me: "these cutscenes, and this whole clicking are boring, I'd better to read the book". Look, I wasn't doing a detox, but the simple fact of trying to read more helped me a lot. And it's not like I didn't have problems with gaming: Even if that one game wasn't getting all my attention, I used games as escapism, and reading was a way to combat it.
  • Maybe watching movies and series are a good option if you don't have issues with that (what is possible, since they're not interactive). It's a good option, though, to try to keep the watching pace at most as frequent as if the series were being released in TV like a normal series from 60's or 70's. Having all the episodes to watch at once is a big trap.

Well, I was searching for a topic where this could be useful. The goal here is to decrease the regret for not playing anymore. So if these hints are useful to anyone, please tell me, I'd be happy to know. And if any of these are not good, tell me too, so I can improve this.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Part of quitting is giving up 100s of pounds or dollars worth of stuff and regretting that we didn't do something differently but instead of dwelling on that we need to find something new to pour our attention into so try to find a new hobby you can get obsessed with tiny details of

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  • 10 months later...

You are sorry to leave video games? You should reevaluate your principles. Don’t know your stage in life, but here is what I gather.

Do you think gaming life gives you a high self worth, dignity and confidence? How will you be taken by women that you are attracted to? How will gaming life affect your physical, mental health, prospects of becoming a great achiever and worker in your community?

Please, no wishful thinking. I used to think I could combine gaming and profession and this was a great self-deception. I’ve read in dozens of journals here that former gamers deceive themselves that the addiction will not affect them.

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  • 1 month later...

Looking at the other people in my life who just dont care about these games as much as I do kinda helps.  I wanted to play FF7 remake.  But I know so many people with fulfilled happy lives, who dont play games.  If not playing FF7 isnt a big deal to them, their life is still pretty good regardless, then its probably going to be fine for me too.  There was ALOT of hype for that game.  Hype doesnt help.  It gets us excited about stuff we havent even experienced, and makes us want to experience it as soon as possible.  This has bothered me in the past, including with FF7 since it is only on PS4.  But im thinking forward now and im pretty sure im not missing anything for my life by not playing a game.

Another option is to read all the story/spoilers  so you know how it goes without playing it.

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1 hour ago, LadyRen said:

Looking at the other people in my life who just dont care about these games as much as I do kinda helps.  I wanted to play FF7 remake.  But I know so many people with fulfilled happy lives, who dont play games.  If not playing FF7 isnt a big deal to them, their life is still pretty good regardless, then its probably going to be fine for me too.  There was ALOT of hype for that game.  Hype doesnt help.  It gets us excited about stuff we havent even experienced, and makes us want to experience it as soon as possible.  This has bothered me in the past, including with FF7 since it is only on PS4.  But im thinking forward now and im pretty sure im not missing anything for my life by not playing a game.

Another option is to read all the story/spoilers  so you know how it goes without playing it.

I can relate to this SO HARD. I felt that way about Animal Crossing: New Horizons so much that I bought an entire switch + accessories Just to play it. I got bored within a month.
I actually had more fun with the hype and waiting for it to come out, watching every little trailer over and over and all the trailer breakdown videos... 

I wanted to play FF7 Remake but ended up watching it on YouTube instead... and ended up not really liking it.
Which sucks a lot I'm a major fan of the original, and I've been excited about it since the original announcement and preview years and years ago. 

I'm actually really grateful for those two things, it helped me realize that no new game is going to be worth relapsing over, and avoiding the hype trains is essential.

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  • 3 weeks later...
On 5/20/2019 at 6:44 AM, kanan4 said:

My general regrets are all around spending money on sites like ssegold. No, the services works fine and helped me to improve my gameplay...but I don't get why I spent money and didn't play myself.

Yep, i also spent a lot of money on gaming, but i know game is not my life, and i must quite it, back to normal life.

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 6/1/2020 at 6:22 AM, LadyRen said:

Looking at the other people in my life who just dont care about these games as much as I do kinda helps.  I wanted to play FF7 remake.  But I know so many people with fulfilled happy lives, who dont play games.  If not playing FF7 isnt a big deal to them, their life is still pretty good regardless, then its probably going to be fine for me too.  There was ALOT of hype for that game.  Hype doesnt help.  It gets us excited about stuff we havent even experienced, and makes us want to experience it as soon as possible.  This has bothered me in the past, including with FF7 since it is only on PS4.  But im thinking forward now and im pretty sure im not missing anything for my life by not playing a game.

Another option is to read all the story/spoilers  so you know how it goes without playing it.

I also believe this is a great mindset to solve it. We feel like we miss something really important. But like you said "[...] im pretty sure im not missing anything for my life by not playing a game." There is so much truth in it. Therefore replacing it with something important and meaningful is the most important thing. Compared to being bored, maybe watching TV, we indeed will miss something. But compared to building a family or a business or helping people in the community gaming will or should always lose with the right mindset. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Old post, but this could probably benefit other members.

I think a large part of the appeal of these 'classic games' was playing them at the time they came out.

I've played Halo and Final Fantasy 7.

I loved halo and thought it was awesome on the original xbox

As a kid, I had several chances to purchase final fantasy, but never did. I played the demo once as a young teen, and regretted the decision not to purchase..

Looking back, I realize I could never enjoy playing the original game. The story is interesting, but the graphics, and game mechanics are dated to say the least. The same thing can be said about Halo. And yeah, these games are being remade, but overall the quality of the gaming experience is heading downwards. Gaming publishers are producing record profits and the focus is now on MTX, Lootboxes, and DLC. Now's a great time to quit.

Edited by OptimisticMalcontent
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  • 2 weeks later...

Compare those regrets with reaching 59 years old and never having written that book, or learned that second language, or created that awesome animation.  Compare "I never played Halo 7" to "I neglected my wife, and kids", "I went to my Mom's funeral regretting that we were never very close", "I never got very far at work", "I have no real close friends"

Video games are a cancer that eats your time as it dissolves your real life away from you.  

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  • 1 month later...

I think what you're meaning to say is that you want or wish you could play Halo and Final Fantasy but you've already made the decision to quit video games.  I've been in a similar situation where I yearned to play oldschool runescape again and wished that I could play again with a different account type.  

What I did to combat this was I wrote down, on paper or even on this forum, from start to finish what I would do in the game, why I was playing it, and how I would feel when I accomplished this/finished the game.  I figured out that, just like my last play through, I dumped countless hours into this game and after beating it I felt empty and unfulfilled.  From all the hours I played this one game, the memories are fleeting and wimpy compared to memories I've made with people in real life, that we can share with each other.  

Plus, once you've already seen the 'dark side' of what a video game addiction is, it's hard to play with a clean conscience.  At least this is the case for me.  If you do, you'll have to start over.  It may seem unbearable, but as the saying goes: curiosity killed the cat.  In this case, curiosity being the potential 'fun' you could have on these games.

 

Edited by Average_Guy
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  • 5 months later...
On 5/20/2019 at 1:44 AM, kanan4 said:

Sometimes i can spend money on sites like Overboost. No, the services works fine and helped me to improve my gameplay...but I don't get why I spent money and didn't play myself.

I spend a lot of time for learn many triks and tips, but sometimes it's not enough for win matches in a raw. If it's happened, i can take help from guys like this, and usually i like to play in group 🙂

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  • 1 month later...
On 4/30/2019 at 8:08 PM, Guest said:

Playing an RPG (not an electronic one, but in real life, with friends, together around a table) - this one I need to know your opinions, is it a good idea?

Yes! Nothing builds community faster than Tabletop! I'd recommend checking out DnD 5e (much simpler then old DnD) or Savage Worlds.

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  • 1 year later...

So you are worried with a potential loss in your mind?

New games will be rolled out every year. I think 90 days detox is necessary to get rid of fog brain. After the 90 days detox, you will have a new perspective on what life without games means to you and be able to decide which is better.

Reminds me of a fable of a snail in a well when a huge wave cast a fish into it. The fish tried to explain that it came from the sea, to what the snail replied “Is there as much water in that sea as in this well?” To what the fish replied “No! A lot more water!”, but the snail said “I cannot understand that, for this well is all that i have seen in my life”

Edited by Amphibian220
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  • 2 months later...
On 11/29/2022 at 5:29 PM, Amphibian220 said:

Reminds me of a fable of a snail in a well when a huge wave cast a fish into it. The fish tried to explain that it came from the sea, to what the snail replied “Is there as much water in that sea as in this well?” To what the fish replied “No! A lot more water!”, but the snail said “I cannot understand that, for this well is all that i have seen in my life”

Oh!!! I used to read another fable (from Indian) similar like yours. It's not about a snail. It's about a blind man.

Once upon a time, a blind man lives in a room. Because he can't see anything so he won't believe anything everyone said there it is.

Then a doctor bring a miracle cure from Himalaya mountain to treat him. Then he can see everything. His eyes became normal.

Then he said, "Now I can see everything. I believe, I believe what I see, what people told me.

Then someone told him, "You know, all of thing you can see is just things on the Earth. Out side our earth, there is sun, moon and lots of star, planet!" 

The he said, "What! No way! There isn't thing outside the earth. I didn't see them. I didn't believe!!!"

That's it!!!

PS: I'm not Indian. I just read this story from an author who collected lots of fables to write a book!!!

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  • 5 months later...
On 10/14/2018 at 11:39 AM, seriousjay said:

Hello, I can sympathize with you as I have similar regrets. The best advice I can give is to ride it out. Regret, like all emotions, passes with time. In the meantime, engage in activities that you can be proud of to replace gaming.

One other thing you can do to try to trick yourself if you really need a way through it is to tell yourself that maybe one day, when you can play games again without feeling like they're pulling you in uncontrollably, you'll go through those games. That day will come and you will probably tell yourself that you don't even care anymore at that time. Telling yourself that you'll play those games one day may help to relieve the feelings of regret.

Agreed. Be the master, be the controller, not the one being controlled. 

Regret is a lack of game substitute and fear of replacing. It is the unknown. 

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