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Cindpline

Again, asking for help.

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 Day one hundred and something. I feel depressive. There's no point in life. Nothing really important.

2 hours ago I browsed youtube mindlessely searching for joy, that that didn't came. 

I don't know why I'm so depressive. Before the detox, I thought that maybe my "problem" were game addiction, my stammering or puberty or I thought this is just my new persona and I have to learn with it. I want to know what It is. Maybe Game addiction. But then my mom says often that It is just puberty. 

 I have been playing the piano for about 6 years now. I sing in a choir. Then of course I have school. So I have two hobbies right now. 

I'm bringing my age pretty often here but I'm 13 and I have puberty at the same time so quitting gaming is very diffucult. All my friends play, but they play in moderation and other hobbies too(if you count gaming as a hobby) and we go out to play football at weekends. 

If I would have just known when I was younger that I should have tried other things than gaming. 

I feel that I just can't quit games forever. They are so Important. How I survived. 

I think my Gaming problem was more like a problem than an addiction. Addiction sounds like you can't do anything else than the spesific activity. Gaming was kinda a way how I survived life. 

I want to get out of this hell. This gaming thing and gaming addiction is like curse. 

 

 

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7 hours ago, Cindpline said:

 Day one hundred and something. I feel depressive. There's no point in life. Nothing really important.

It is quite possible that hormons do screw you right now. Puberty is a volatile period an can hit you hard. But there are ways to steer against depressive tendencies:

Basics:

  • Sleep right (something between 6 - 10 hours)
  • Eat right (evade sugar and white bread to have a more stable energy level)
  • Do some sort of physical activity 3-4 times a week(football is fine but maybe you should do smth. under the week too: Calisthenics/ Running are two activities where you can start easily)

Advanced:

  • Write into a gratefulness journal every day. Just write 3 things down you are grateful for. I.e I am grateful  for having friends to play football, I am grateful for having two working hands, I am grateful for having two parents who care about me. It can be small things too. Like I am grateful for this tasty cup of coffee. Try to find new things every day. You'll be surprised how it can change your perspective on live
  • Find a purpose for your life and not of life in general. If you don't know what you want to do with your life its fine. Then you should make it your purpose to find that purpose! Think about what you want to do with your life. It doesn't have to be something epic. Maybe you just want to have sex with beautiful women. Or live a quiet life with a woman/men you love. Just think about what you want and start work for it. If you know what you want make small steps in the direction you want to go. If I am going back to the sex with beautiful woman example you could for example try to speak with girls more. Challenge yourself to talk with three different girls at school everyday. You could learn how you can become an attractive man and work on that (spoiler: Looks aren't as important for that). Then you do other harder things. What you will realize is that you have more things to do then time and you will feel joy every time you step closer to your goal (whatever it will be). This is the point when live will start to feel meaningful.

The basics on scientific evidence that they will increase the level of hormons which will make you feel good. In my experience it is really important to get these basics right before you can search for psychological reasons of feeling bad in a meaningful way.

 

Addiction is an activity which is impacting your life in a harmful way and which you can't control.

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@WorkInProgress

On 23.5.2018 at 7:34 AM, WorkInProgress said:

If you don't know what you want to do with your life its fine. Then you should make it your purpose to find that purpose!

Can you explain this more? And id it okay if it isn't that long time goal? 

Edited by Cindpline

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I'm a big-picture-first guy, so I think you need to ask yourself some big picture questions.

Like, what happens when you die? What's reality? Why are you here?

You need to figure this out for yourself. If you know where you're headed, you'll know where to go. If you know where to go, you'll know what path to take, and every step on the way will have purpose.

Otherwise it's just wondering around, lost. It's like going to university without knowing what you want to do for work. You'll wander around, learn a bunch of random stuff, and probably end up disappointed.

These are tough questions obviously. But like the person above said, if you don't know your purpose, make it your purpose to figure out your purpose :) It might take a while. Gaming and other forms of entertainment are just avoiding those questions and their consequences.

But in more practical terms: spend time with people. And instead of looking at them as means for you to achieve something, just be interested in them. Learn about their lives, ask them questions, see what they struggle with. Help them if you can. Be the type of guy who people open up to because you care. And since you're in school and it's likely that you keep friends with certain types of people, try reaching out outside your comfort zone a bit. That might include people in your family too :)

Modern life is so weird because technology has removed a lot of real-world interaction. I'm not talking about having "friends" because "friends" nowadays are just people you hang out with. They're not very deep relationships and I often wonder if that's the reason for why depression is so common nowadays.

Anyway, that's just a bunch of my opinions. If it resonates with you, feel free to PM me.

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