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Yann

Wanting to share my story...

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Hello !

My name is Yann and I come from Switzerland. I'm 21 and I feel completely lost in life without video games since I've stopped.

I started playing video games when I was 11 with my elder brother. Since then my childhood has always been a game of hide and seek with my parents my only goal was to play more and more. I was hooked as soon as I started playing WoW. I played a lot during school in total secret to my parents, as this game was forbidden to me. 

After school I discovered LoL with consumed me for my whole apprenticeship until I left for the army.

Then when I started the army I couldn't play and was just playing on weekends occasionally. And I have good memories of the army and was sad when my service ended and I had to go home. For the first time in my life I had the feeling like I was belonging somewhere and had the feeling that I had friends. But it all ended pretty suddenly when my service was finished.

So when my service finished (last April) I decided to leave my boring old room which I was used to living in and went to Germany to the heart of Berlin for a language school (living on my savings until December 24th of last year).

As I didn't have any place to sleep at the start I stayed in a hostel for a whole month until I found a flat. Staying in the hostel was great I was happy and had loads of friends and was very active. We were sleeping in rooms of 10 people.

I found a flat and then little by little I started playing video games again. 

First I reinstalled WoW and played a bit, then a bit more, then more and more. And then Video games took over completely again. I found a guild on WoW and was hanging out with them. And since July I played video games and isolated myself until 24th of December where I had to go back home and confront my parents about the fact that I had dropped out of the school. 

After this I was feeling terrible about myself and wanted to end my life. So I made a contract with myself, that I would never play video games again, and so I did up to now. 50 days...

So its 50 days after and I'm craving really really bad to play LoL or WoW. I think about it everyday... 

I have done loads of stuff this past 50days, with my friends, family, brother, I was called in 21 days to the army for a mission. But now its been two weeks since I finished my mission and I'm running out of stuff to do. I'm looking for a job as well but its not that easy because I like to watch series or videos on youtube or go out to the bar or parties to try and forget video games.

But despite all this I keep craving it and I feel like I'm back to my old life but without video games which is worse. I'm not doing anything at home AND I can't play video games so its even worse. I don't have that much friends or at least close friends or group of friends unfortunately. 

I feel like I belong nowhere at the moment and feel like a total looser !

Has anyone else felt this way ? 

If yes what did you do to feel less like a looser ?

Any input is appreciated.

Cheers

 

 

 

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Welcome @Yann!

Hang in there man. It seems the moments you were playing less were the moments you were most involved with other people. Now you've found yourself more alone and the cravings are coming back. Video games are the solution you know to the same old problem, they won't give you anything new. You can always play, but then you'll always stay the same, feeling crappy and unfulfilled.

Everyone feels like a loser sometimes for many reasons. In your case I'd say: get new hobbies that give you the opportunity to make new friends. Don't stay all day at home becoming more and more isolated. I did that once and it was a terrible mistake. Get out there, do stuff, challenge yourself to try new approaches.

We have your back, if you ever need to talk, express yourself or seek support, this is a great place to do it. From there, start building. You can do it!

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I'm trying.

I've found one new hobby. 

Its cooking. I'm having a lot of fun learning new recipes and cooking for my family.

Other than that Im about to start going to the gym with my elder brother.

But at the end of the day I think I just need a job. 

But its hard focusing on that when you're alone at home and all you can think about is playing video games.

 

Sometimes I feel like not playing at all is self destructiv. Because then I think about it all day even when I go out. But imagine if I play like an hour a day then at least maybe I wont think about it as much. I dont know...

What do you guys think ?

Anyways will keep you guys updated.

Cheers

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That's the thing. I'm currently lacking hobbies and the output of my "job" is worse because of that. You have to keep a balance, don't think about them as "lesser" things compared to a job. If you're happy, you'll work harder. If you work harder, you'll earn more, and money pays for hobbies which give happiness in return. It's a closed circle.

I think you should try combining new activities with not gaming. You'll probably see that you're doing great, and you'll either forget about games or try moderation. The majority of people who try moderation fail and have to quit again, but I'm not against trying, you have to experience things yourself. But first you should end the 90 days while making an effort to actively change things.

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Welcome Yann! Thanks for sharing.  Wow, 50 days is awesome man.  Cam recommends having a grateful journal, and that's something I try to daily, is hand-write at least 3 things I'm grateful for every day.  It  can really help you put a positive light on things.  Other than that, I think it's about making connections and being unafraid to be uncomfortable.  Not saying I don't struggle with that myself, but I believe it in it though.  See you around, look forward to hearing more

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Thanks guys for your answers.

@Hitaru thats an interesting idea. I never thought that having more hobbies would help you work better. I think its a great idea. I'm going to try it myself. This information could help me a lot, cheers man! :)

@Cam Adair Hi ! Thanks man I saw one of your vids you seem like a nice person. My goal is to find a job, move out, and maybe meet a special girl.

@STRONGERIDEAL Vermittler haha! und dich ? Bist du auch Schweizer ? Hast du auch dein RS gmacht ?

@Reno F thanks man ! Yes I notice that. I had feared this day when I was free in Berlin doing what I wanted ! 

@dwalk77 Hey man :) thanks for your kind words. Ok that could be a good idea. Im going to try it. Yes making connections is great I love doing it. But in the past I seem to have made poor decisions that brought me away from people. But hey at least now I know that I'm happier when around people. Now I need to find activities. Cheers mate!

 

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