Leon's Journal

[Beoron]

Day 3

Start of the diary…

Gaming has been part of my life since the early 90’s. I would play with siblings and friends throughout the years. However, realistically, the last 10 years the habit has been more of a singular isolated addiction – limited only be time, resources and other commitments.

On reflection I have been clever in how I indulged in this addition to avoid adverse scrutiny. It has never stopped me from getting to work (although I have frequently arrived tired), achieving
academically or maintaining a basic level of getting through life. This, in conjunction with other excuses and selective comparisons, allowed me to delude myself that there was very little impact from gaming on my life, which is not the truth.

The truth is that I have lost opportunities, given up other hobbies and suffered socially, despite giving the appearance of being outwardly successful.

That said, I definitely had some great times playing video games with other friends. Funnily enough, those are the times I really remember rather than the times alone.

The username I chose - Beoron - was my normal tag. It seemed fitting to use it for this forum.

Until next time.

Leon

[Hitaru]

Great to see your journal posted! 

[Cam Adair]

Hi Leon! 

[thehondasc00py]

I appreciate you for being self-honest like that.

Good luck! (Luck isn't needed)

[Beoron]

Day 9

Still sticking to my guns. I have had some small time to reflect since my last post. Mainly, I have been thinking about the previous time that I quit and what the experience was like. Some key ideas from this time were:

 

Mind games

Your mind tries to convince you to play. You tell yourself that you will moderate etc however this is not possible until you have yourself changed. How can you moderate unless you have given yourself better habits/go to behaviours?

 

Cravings

Cravings are real. I have these often however these tend to change over time in frequency and what I desire. I will discuss these in another post.

 

Gaming media

Video Games “news” websites, youtube etc will only serve to re-enforce the addiction. Realise that these are just forms of marketing. Seriously. You don’t generally see articles on IGN about the working conditions of video game developers. Generally, these websites and channels are just curated marketing platforms that show selected play throughs and trailers designed to fuel the hype machine.

 

Just my ten cents,

 

Check back soon.

Leon