Day 3 First timer

[AngryFrog]

I was ignorant for a long time.. But this website gave me enough information to re-think my choices. I'm 27 years old, and I've spent most of my waking hours hiding in virtual worlds... It was easier that way.. Real world was just too hard for me to handle, so I tried to escape it by any means necessary, ignoring everyone, pushing those who cared about me away.. I've been depressed and socially anxious as long as I can remember.. It just was unbearable sometimes and video games let me forget about that, to live another life if you will, years gone by, and I understood that problems won't go anywhere I will still have to face them later on. So I searched how to... And I found you guys, so here I am, completely removed all my games, all those virtual worlds where I felt at home. The only friends I had (virtual ones) left behind.. Scared as hell, facing all the feelings I was escaping for years from. Went to a psychiatrist today, asked for help... 

Video games didn't cause me this ( according to her) it was just a tool, an attempt of my brain to escape all those negative feelings. And it seems that it will be a HELL to cope with this, but as a smart man once said: "If you're going through hell, keep going".  
 

Edited November 29, 2017 by AngryFrog

[dweems]

2 hours ago, AngryFrog said:

I was ignorant for a long time.. But this website gave me enough information to re-think my choices. I'm 27 years old, and I've spent most of my waking hours hiding in virtual worlds... It was easier that way.. Real world was just too hard for me to handle, so I tried to escape it by any means necessary, ignoring everyone, pushing those who cared about me away.. I've been depressed and socially anxious as long as I can remember.. It just was unbearable sometimes and video games let me forget about that, to live another life if you will, years gone by, and I understood that problems won't go anywhere I will still have to face them later on. So I searched how to... And I found you guys, so here I am, completely removed all my games, all those virtual worlds where I felt at home. The only friends I had (virtual ones) left behind.. Scared as hell, facing all the feelings I was escaping for years from. Went to a psychiatrist today, asked for help... 

Video games didn't cause me this ( according to her) it was just a tool, an attempt of my brain to escape all those negative feelings. And it seems that it will be a HELL to cope with this, but as a smart man once said: "If you're going through hell, keep going".  
 

I think you're off to a great start. Deleting your games will definitely decrease your motive to play them. Also I'd like to mention you are not alone. Loads of people (such as myself) have spent a large fraction of their life in front of a screen, being secluded from the real world. It gives you the life you've dreamed, let's you do things you can't do in real life, and it gives us a false sense of achievement. I believe in you! Keep it up.

[Laney]

Wow. You are amazing.

I am in awe of your strength to take such a wild step for yourself! 

Although drastic, let us find ways to help you maintain through the withdrawal period. Think about what you might miss most. The social aspect? The entertainment? The challenge?

What steps will you take to give yourself what your mind needs to stay strong through this period? 

The real world is scary to you, you say. Yeah, it is daunting sometimes even for me; a girl who still lives with her parents at 24 but has a degree and should really have a full time job by now...what am I waiting for???!! Heck if I know. But I've been building my self confidence slowly every week by surrounding myself with successful, wholesome people who believe in me as I believe in them. I'm in therapy and I go every week and I've discovered my issues and grown through many of them. I started a bullet journal and have been making my bed every morning, I feel so much more put together and sure of myself by such a simple positive change.

I am ready to start living my life instead of waiting and avoiding it.

Looking forward to reading your updates thanks for the inspiration and insight into my own life.

[AngryFrog]

9 hours ago, dweems said:

I think you're off to a great start. Deleting your games will definitely decrease your motive to play them. Also I'd like to mention you are not alone. Loads of people (such as myself) have spent a large fraction of their life in front of a screen, being secluded from the real world. It gives you the life you've dreamed, let's you do things you can't do in real life, and it gives us a false sense of achievement. I believe in you! Keep it up.

Thank you man! It's always easier to fight if you are not alone.

[AngryFrog]

6 hours ago, Laney said:

Wow. You are amazing.

I am in awe of your strength to take such a wild step for yourself! 

Although drastic, let us find ways to help you maintain through the withdrawal period. Think about what you might miss most. The social aspect? The entertainment? The challenge?

What steps will you take to give yourself what your mind needs to stay strong through this period? 

The real world is scary to you, you say. Yeah, it is daunting sometimes even for me; a girl who still lives with her parents at 24 but has a degree and should really have a full time job by now...what am I waiting for???!! Heck if I know. But I've been building my self confidence slowly every week by surrounding myself with successful, wholesome people who believe in me as I believe in them. I'm in therapy and I go every week and I've discovered my issues and grown through many of them. I started a bullet journal and have been making my bed every morning, I feel so much more put together and sure of myself by such a simple positive change.

I am ready to start living my life instead of waiting and avoiding it.

Looking forward to reading your updates thanks for the inspiration and insight into my own life.

Thank you!

I believe we all have strength, all we need to do is decide. I could've done this years ago(any of us could), but there was no decision to do so. Decision came (in my case) when I reached the bottom, 27 y.o., live with parents, no relationships..

And there's only one step I could make to keep myself going, I just made a vision, of what I want to be. You see I'm stubborn as hell  And if I have that magical "WHY" I can do it. College year was incredibly hard experience for me due to my severe social anxiety, and like that wasn't enough during those years I lost my family member plus video games almost every night. Despite all of that I managed to finish my college, even though I wanted to quit multiple times, but you see, I had that "WHY", it pulled me through, that's why I believe we all have that strength needed

So yeah, I have no doubts that you are ready to start living your life too, just keep in sight your vision.

[AngryFrog]

6 minutes ago, Death13 said:

"Keep going" is correct. It is difficult to be alone, and it is hard to accept that no one can save you, except yourself. I tried ditching games at 24 originally, didn't work, fell into relapse after relapse. Got bullied out of college on top of it all (short story shorter, my professor hated me). My own issue in the past is that I've ignored support systems like this, but they are crucial. Keep reaching out and find a hobby to immerse yourself in. I've learned that quitting gaming (for me) is trading in one hobby (obsession) for another. The key difference between gaming and a better hobby is that the better hobby will turn into a skill that you can carry with you into the real world.

Ohh I understand you well, I had bullying issues myself, but I was stubborn, I beat the sh** out of them I men I got punched enough myself too, but I had that mindset formed  that I am alone too and I was stubborn enough to keep myself up, it might cause that social anxiety issue I'm going through now or video games... who knows now. Of course being alone is hard, but many things are hard in this life, even having close friends my be hard at times, no?  And then, there is this  thing... video games.. pure joy! how easy it is to trade real life for all those magical virtual ones. I fell in to a trap here.

so yeah as I've mentioned on the previous post to that lady, We have to have that "WHY" and we will be fine. I read through posts Cam made about video games, how it affects our brain, nervous system, that's my "WHY"

[WorkInProgress]

Welcome to the forums,

Good job on starting oyur journal here. I think persistence is key to this. Especially if your motivation fades it is important to have built healthy habits like daily journaling or similar things to keep you on an acceptable baseline. Stubborness is a great asset in this aspect of the game. The other side is still to strategize how you'll deal with problems if they come up. What do you do if you're sos tressed out that you can't imagine another solution but flgiht into a virtual reality? Make a plan and write it down. It doesn't have to be seomthing complicated. Maybe it is as simple as sit down and count to 100. The main thing is that you'll be proactive and think of posisble failures and ways how to deal with them. Deleting your games falls also in this category (making it very inconvenient to relapse). So I am excited to see your updates and am happy to support you in any way if you have questions.

We got your back man.

[AngryFrog]

1 hour ago, WorkInProgress said:

Welcome to the forums,

Good job on starting oyur journal here. I think persistence is key to this. Especially if your motivation fades it is important to have built healthy habits like daily journaling or similar things to keep you on an acceptable baseline. Stubborness is a great asset in this aspect of the game. The other side is still to strategize how you'll deal with problems if they come up. What do you do if you're sos tressed out that you can't imagine another solution but flgiht into a virtual reality? Make a plan and write it down. It doesn't have to be seomthing complicated. Maybe it is as simple as sit down and count to 100. The main thing is that you'll be proactive and think of posisble failures and ways how to deal with them. Deleting your games falls also in this category (making it very inconvenient to relapse). So I am excited to see your updates and am happy to support you in any way if you have questions.

We got your back man.

Thank you man. Speaking about motivation, it's not reliable thing, if a goal is long-term it will fade without a doubt. I've read her book, she has a really good idea why motivation won't work.  Youtube link