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Starting my 90 day Detox Today


Some Yahoo

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It's day Zero (I refuse to call it 1 because 1 must be earned).

  • Uninstalled SWTOR.
  • Uninstalled Blade and Soul
  • nuked Steam
  • nuked NCSoft launcher

Strategy for getting through the long boring hours?

  1. take walks
  2. play with my dog
  3. Maybe I'll call my Dad.
  4. Oh yeah and try to get 8 hours of billable each day

I fully expect to relapse as I have done many times before, just not TODAY.   Not sure if wasting time on YouTube should count.  I think I'll steer clear of YT just for today to be safe.

 

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Hi and welcome to the forums. Good job on getting rid of your games and the direct  contact to gaming content. You only need to get to the next day. And then do this again.

Why do you want to quit gaming? To write this up can help you with staying abstinent. How is gaming influence you in a bad way? How would imagine to be without the need to game all the time? If you don't have clear reasons layed out for your self it can be hard to stay motivated. So take the time and write it down (thinking about it isn#t enough because our thoughts are always unfocussed). If you write it down it becomes real.

 

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Day 1

I want to quit gaming because I am a human being and I crave social contact.  When I am old and dying, no guild member or game company is going to be there by my bedside, my friends and family will.  The people who matter are getting too little of me.  I have 2 friends and I give them less and less.  I feel like an outcast at social events because I have nothing real to share with anyone,  It goes like this:

Friend one: "Last weekend we all went up to the lake and played in the water"

Friend two: "I spent the whole weekend practicing for the community choir"

Me: "There's a cool line in one mission in DCUO where Wonder Woman says a line from Firefly."

My social status updates are not about me.  I have too little of a real life to converse with anyone.

As for Today, it seems some factor caused me to only get 3 hours sleep last night, so my "free time" was taken up sleeping.  I am really hoping for better tonight.  I need to do some amazing work this week.

I can report that I managed to stay out of all games today, and off of YouTube.  So this day totally counts.

 

 

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20 minutes ago, Some Yahoo said:

Day 1

I can report that I managed to stay out of all games today, and off of YouTube.  So this day totally counts.

Good job.

 

21 minutes ago, Some Yahoo said:

Day 1

I want to quit gaming because I am a human being and I crave social contact.  When I am old and dying, no guild member or game company is going to be there by my bedside, my friends and family will.  The people who matter are getting too little of me.  I have 2 friends and I give them less and less.  I feel like an outcast at social events because I have nothing real to share with anyone

That is a great reason. I think quitting gaming can help you here too because you will become more interested in other activities. I personally was never able to focus on another hobby or side-gig while I was gaming. I needed the time I had to game away. With all that free time I had time to get bored again because I hadn't the willpower to work all the time instead (not recommended btw.). When you are interested in other things you naturally become more socially because you start to get really interested in the stuff people tell you. Beeing interested in others makes you a good social beeing. Not beeing interesting yourself (helps though ;)).

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5 hours ago, Some Yahoo said:

Day 1

I want to quit gaming because I am a human being and I crave social contact.  When I am old and dying, no guild member or game company is going to be there by my bedside, my friends and family will.  The people who matter are getting too little of me.  I have 2 friends and I give them less and less.  I feel like an outcast at social events because I have nothing real to share with anyone,  It goes like this:

Friend one: "Last weekend we all went up to the lake and played in the water"

Friend two: "I spent the whole weekend practicing for the community choir"

Me: "There's a cool line in one mission in DCUO where Wonder Woman says a line from Firefly."

My social status updates are not about me.  I have too little of a real life to converse with anyone.

As for Today, it seems some factor caused me to only get 3 hours sleep last night, so my "free time" was taken up sleeping.  I am really hoping for better tonight.  I need to do some amazing work this week.

I can report that I managed to stay out of all games today, and off of YouTube.  So this day totally counts.

 

 

Congrats on your first day! I feel as if in some ways I am in a similar situation to you in that I hate it when people ask me questions about myself because I don't feel like I do anything worth sharing. So usually when people ask me questions like what did you do this week, I'd just try and go around the question by saying stuff such as "Oh, just stuff and things". Personally I'm planning to actively seek out things to do away from my home such as: going on a new roller coaster, attending random community social events, joining a running club etc. That way I'd get out there and experience new / different things. Anyway best of luck to you :D.

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23 hours ago, Some Yahoo said:

Slept great last night... I just chuckled because the last several games I got took 3+ days to download.  That means I need to have 3 full days of "relapse thinking" in order to actually relapse.  

Haha, hope to hear more updates soon ;)

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One thing I want to note here - In conjunction with quitting gaming, I have gone to a doctor to deal with possible depression.  Not sure how, but it seems like the two things are linked.

Fundamentally, a lifetime spent gaming has no real satisfaction, no real personal growth, no real accomplishments.  As I said in my profile, I am an old man.  There's a lot of regret rolling around in my cranial cavity.  

 

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Welcome Yahoo! You have the right intent behind your journey, so all the best to you.

Doesn't matter if you're an old man or not, all that matters now is today. That time in the past is a sunk cost, it will never come back. Someone on the forums here used to have a signature that said "the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now."

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Ok, some notes.

I am substituting youtube for games - and the result is that my head is getting all full of political opinion.  Better than wasting 15 hours a day in Blade And Soul, but still not reaching my potential.

Also my meds just got changed, and they are playing a little havoc on me.  muscle pain, ringing in my ears, ick.  Makes it hard to concentrate on my work.

It doesn't help that I have a MASSIVE deadline coming up, and I am extremely stressed out about it.  

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A lot of us find we're using phones, social media and tv shows to fill the gap created by not gaming.

The detachment is hard, the brain hurts not being able to use these mediums at first. Once you discover how to fill this time it's a wonderful feeling. Good luck I look forward to reading your updates!

Edited by Laney
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Since I can't sleep I thought I'd list all the games I have played in some order just to prove how old I am :)

  • Star Trek game at Lawrence Livermore lab in Berkely. Yes, this one played on a teletype and printed on a long roll of yellow paper.
  • Coin-op games in arcades
    • Pac Man
    • Defender
    • Moon patrol
    • Galaga
  • Mines of Moria at college played on a PDP-11 that was built from a kit.
  • Got my Atari 400, then 800, then 800XL (and I actually worked a couple years at Atari home computer division)
    • Defender
    • Pac Man
    • Star Raiders
    • Jump Man
    • BallBlazer
  • Got my first PC (an IBM XT clone - it's still in the garage)
    • Scorched Earth
    • Trade Wars
  • After the dial-up modem days...
    • Subspace (now Subspace Continuum)
    • Tomb Raider
    • Descent
    • Doom
    • Eve Online
    • Second Life
    • There (when it was free)
    • Star Wars: The Old Republic
    • Tera Rising
    • City of Heroes
    • DC Universe Online
    • Blade and Soul

Recently I had been uninstalling SWTOR, DCUO, Tera, and Blade and Soul over and over, then trying to quit, only to find that everyone who knows me in real life had written me out of their lives (because I always turned down invitations), and with nothing else to do, I always went back to gaming after a few weeks.  

 

Edited by Some Yahoo
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1 hour ago, Some Yahoo said:

(because I always turned down invitations)

If you really want to change something fundamentally - start inviting people instead of being invited. Take control. Start discovering new sides of yourself and find new strength.

Don't feel awkward trying something new, focus on discovering the awkwardness in others to stabilize. Divert attention from yourself and consume the world by perceiving it with all senses.

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I was just thinking about the time I rushed through a Valentine's Day dinner with my wife so I could get some special costume on (I think it was) Tera Rising.

Also, my dog (the one in my profile photo) needs to walk every day.  He's getting old and walking will extend his life greatly.  It doesn't hurt me to get my eyes off the screen for a while too.

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57 minutes ago, Some Yahoo said:

I was just thinking about the time I rushed through a Valentine's Day dinner with my wife so I could get some special costume on (I think it was) Tera Rising.

Also, my dog (the one in my profile photo) needs to walk every day.  He's getting old and walking will extend his life greatly.  It doesn't hurt me to get my eyes off the screen for a while too.

I have been reading your journal to see how a fellow addict goes through a 90 day detox. Honestly, I'm quite impressed on how much effort you've put into it, and I think that you can handle it and pull through. Also you're dog is adorable! Can't wait for more updates. :D

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I have heard as life gets faster with more years, one can combat the quickness of it through avoiding monotony and keeping variety in one's life, and education. Not necessarily school, but like learning skills or hobbies or emotions.

My middle aged deaf friend with two kids went world backpacking for 2 years, he is back now and running for Congress or Senator in his state. He's a huge inspiration for me for who I can be no matter what age.

https://m.facebook.com/haulmarkforcongress/

It is important to say I met this man from Lineage 2 years before he began traveling (maybe gaming was the right path for me and this is exactly where I am meant to be after this struggle) and have met him in real life since then. He has changed my life. He has taught me so much about perceiving the world around me and being open to communication in forms other than words. And an inspiration for my own possibilities.

Another older woman completed something like seven marathons in seven different continents in seven days. It's like endless what we can do depending on where our interests or goals lie--so long as we get rid of that I don't have time because now I'm older thought! There's no time like now and you will have an extra edge because of all the skills you have been developing until now.

Edited by Laney
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