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How to handle frustration with new activities?


Hitaru

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There are some things I dropped in the past because videogames and now I want to recover, the main two being drawing and violin. Of course I just couldn't resist choosing something with a slightly less steep learning curve, I mean come on it's me who we're talking about and patience with myself is not one of my best virtues. The question arises then: How to develop habit in something new and difficult without getting bored or frustrated? 

1. How to make small goals and keep focused on them?

2. How to keep it simple and not overdo it? (avoid binge-pause cicles)

3. How to handle the feelings that come with "improvement dry spells"? (When you make a big improvement and then you get seemingly stagnant)

4. How to avoid negative feelings and escapism? ("I'll never be good at this", "I suck", "Gaming was much easier", etc.)

Extra: For fellow musicians, How to avoid the feeling of guilt with your neighbors? Whenever I want to take up the violin again I can't cope with the feeling of being bothering other people, so I just don't.

(There are probably one or several Cam's videos about this topic, if so please post them below for both answering my question and creating an easy access for other people.)

As usual, thank you guys!

Edited by Hitaru
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1. Find a project to create, or a music piece you want to play. Figure out what you Need to know to do it (techniques and stuff). Then make goals for learning these techniques.

2) Pla a daily routine with a time  minimum . Practice for atleast an hour is a bad idea. Beter go for a goal which seems a little too easy to you (like 10min) and stay consistent with it. You'll find that at times you want to do more and that's fine. At other times you will force yourself to the 10min and be relieved if it is over. Thats fine too. This way you stay consistent. and all thse lttle practice sessions will add up. Bonus Points for doing it everyday at the same time.

3) Read The Slight edge and do what I said at point 2. Make a list where you x every day you practiced and hang it somewhere you can see it.

4) Remind yourself that the slight edge is working and try to relate to your past self,instead to other pople. It is enough if you get better day for day. It doesn't matter how fast you improve. As Long you improve

5) start at 1)

Extra: Talk to your neighbours and ask them if there are times where your muic distracts them especially. Most of the pople will be glad that you speak with them and offer you some times,where it doesn't bother them. If not make clear to them is your right to make musik (I actually is. Atleast in gemany).

Edited by WorkInProgress
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I find a large project can be very overwhelming at times. With my drumming and my art I have two parts to them. I have a more menial practice task that is straightforward and I can do whenever and I have a bigger project too.

I find that keeping in touch with your inspiration is important too. It helps me set my sights on my goals instead of my shittiness.

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Extra: Talk to your neighbours and ask them if there are times where your muic distracts them especially. Most of the pople will be glad that you speak with them and offer you some times,where it doesn't bother them. If not make clear to them is your right to make musik (I actually is. Atleast in gemany).

I would also advise you on that, but sometimes you don't know where you can be heard. Sometimes it is a whole building next to yours and it can't be hard to talk to everybody.

If you play it during the day, i.e. business hours you shouldn't be so worried. Most of people are usually out for study or work. I've seen people taking their instruments to a quieter park and practice there.

My apartment here is very small and the walls are thin, so I bought an electric guitar and play it either unplugged or using headphones. If I wanted to play violin, I guess I'd try to find a way to mute it a bit when doing exercises at home and if I wanted to practice music, I'd go to a nearby park where people usually take their children to play. Someone might start talking to you because of that, and your feeling of guilt might disappear when you notice that people are not disturbed by your music.

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Hitaru, you gotta check out the Slight Edge. I'm halfway reading it. It relates a lot to your questions. 

He mentions in the beginning that when we hit rock bottom we do everything we can to improve our lives. Then when we start surviving. JUST SURVIVING. And we get COMFORTABLE. When we do, we stop doing the things that took us from failure to survival. Then we start going back DOWN to failure.

But the very same things that took us from failure to survival, are the exact same things that can take us from survival to SUCCESS, in whatever it is we want to do - if we just keep doing them.

So it's just a matter of consistency. We already know what we need to do. The problem is that we just stop doing them. It's about consistent habits over time. Compound interest. habits that are easy to do - but also easy not to do. habits that we don't immediately see the results to, but over time, produces the success we want. 

 

Check out the book dude, it's awesome. That's my recommendation.

T

Edited by Tatu92
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