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Hey guys. I haven't played a video game in 73 days and I haven't been on Reddit in 9 days.

I used to use reddit as my journal but it became too distracting and time consuming, addicting, much like video games.

I want to quit video games, as I say this though I am also learning how to code games in Unity. I want to develop VR apps. Some of my best memories are making maps for games, I love concept art, 3D modelling and designing game mechanics - I just hate playing games. I would like to have a career in the development of games or 3D interactive environments (mainly VR).

Other than games I've been going to the gym a lot and leaned down to about 12% body fat. Aiming for 10. Currently weigh 85kg at 6'4". Stronger everyday.

I don't desire to be godly with women but I definitely want to get better. I've only been with 4 women and would like to get to 30 before I'm 30 years old.

I am a huge nerd, I love warhammer, fantasy novels and stories, building video game maps etc. However I know nerds generally don't have the best life so I'm dedicating some time away from all my distractions to focus on building a business, getting ripped in the gym and building my social confidence. 

I just re-installed steam because while I don't want to play any games I miss talking to my map maker friends and want to share my unity creations with them as well. Anyway, if I end up installing a game I will delete steam again.

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Hey there!

I can relate to the use of Reddit. At times, as it is a site for many different things, it can become distracting. However this forum is perfect, as it is dedicated to one thing, quitting games!
If you are able to have steam on your computer, and resist the temptation to play games entirely, that is an amazing feat of willpower, and you should be proud!
Only 17 days till the 90 mark. Make sure you leave a post on that day!

Edited by Michael
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Today I went on a date! My first date in over 2 years :) She was a nice girl but I'm not sure I am attracted to her too much, we'll see how it goes.

I went to the gym with my uni friend and signed up to his gym so we can be gym buddies. We did 300 leg reps, that was fun. 

I then went back to his house and played super smash brothers with him. Do I consider this a relapse? ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! I rarely play that game and he destroyed me, we only played 4 rounds but I got bored and went home. 0 desire to play games.

Yes I installed steam which I agree is a very risky move. However a lot of my steam friends are avid map makers and I'm actually really enjoying making models for them. My career goal is to develop interactive 3D environments. Basically I love everything about games except for playing them - but I know that a lot of people in the industry rarely play games themselves. For uni I'm creatin a VR app in Unity. I'm learning to code in unity and getting good at modeeling in 3DSMAX. My map maker friends motivate me to keep making content, but at the moment I have no desire to join them in their games.

 

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Trying to set up a few more dates. I think I will get some but it takes a decent amount of time to organise all this and of course the guy has to do most of the work.

I am at my friends office working on my app - seems a lot easier to stay focused in an office with other people working. Still it's quite boring - all I am doing though is installing SDK's and API's needed to continue developing my VR app. Cleared about 100GB of useless data.

I plan on going to the gym for a back and shoulders day later tonight - or maybe just back.

I am re-installing CS:GO. I am running -insecure and also port blocking online play. I know this is super risky but I discovered I need the game installed to run the 3DSmax script which auto-exports to source model format. The SDK tools alone arent enough.

The advantage of modelling in 3DSmax is I can make a model for cs:go but use the same model in unity, or unreal engine, or any 3D game/application. I will be developing employable skills needless to say. Once source 2 is released I can develop in that and be employable. I was thinking of doing tutorials soon in my spare time, but I doubt I'll have any.

Balancing life between my passion (3D modelling / interactive environments) and what I need to be doing (gym, dates, style, networking) is the tough part. I might go to a meetup tonight if anything is on.

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Trying to set up a few more dates. I think I will get some but it takes a decent amount of time to organise all this and of course the guy has to do most of the work.

I am at my friends office working on my app - seems a lot easier to stay focused in an office with other people working. Still it's quite boring - all I am doing though is installing SDK's and API's needed to continue developing my VR app. Cleared about 100GB of useless data.

I plan on going to the gym for a back and shoulders day later tonight - or maybe just back.

I am re-installing CS:GO. I am running -insecure and also port blocking online play. I know this is super risky but I discovered I need the game installed to run the 3DSmax script which auto-exports to source model format. The SDK tools alone arent enough.

The advantage of modelling in 3DSmax is I can make a model for cs:go but use the same model in unity, or unreal engine, or any 3D game/application. I will be developing employable skills needless to say. Once source 2 is released I can develop in that and be employable. I was thinking of doing tutorials soon in my spare time, but I doubt I'll have any.

Balancing life between my passion (3D modelling / interactive environments) and what I need to be doing (gym, dates, style, networking) is the tough part. I might go to a meetup tonight if anything is on.

@kortheo is an expert at managing a thriving dating life :D

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Today I didn'tget up until 1pm. I just havent been sleeping or eating properly and after that massive legs day I needed the big sleep.

I went to the gym last night, I can usually do 5-6 pullups in a row but last night I could barely do 3, so clearly I'm really weak right now for some reason.

Trying to cut down my weight - 86kg my waist line is 34inches which is on point for my height (6'4") so soon I can start bulking.

Going to the city now to look for good date locations.

I launched csgo last night to ensure it was installed and hearing the menu music almost gave me a panic attack. I Shut it down as fast as I could - I already blocked the ports so it was impossible to play online anyway. Still.

A big motivation for me is I dumped my gf to improve my life. The thought of me not improving after giving up my relationship is a huge motivator. If I went back to the way I was, I'd be the exact same - except without affection or love. That is simply too depressing to consider.

I have to print out my goal card soon. The only thing that matters is working hard - and oart of that is keeping your mind happy and socail.

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Went into office. Couldn't do any coding but did make 5 3d models and a few texututes. Art Direction is hard. Apparently a lot of people in the game industry don't play games.

I love learning and making levels is soooo fucking fun and satisfying.

I have 2 dates tomorrow, and toight I will go do 2 hours of Aikido.

Currently 85.8kg. So close to 8% BF. I think I am easily 11% atm.

Also I have my fitness goals:

Bodyweight pullups x10 (3-5 atm)

80kg bench x6 (60kg atm)

60kg Incline Bench x6 (40kg atm)

60kg OHP x6 (32.5kg atm)

120kg squat x6 (80kg atm)

 

Edited by play_time_is_over
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Wow what an absolutely awesome day!

I woke up late and missed my first date, which I didn't have a problem with because she wasn't quite my type. Then I asked this girl on PoF that I am really really interested in (like she was my number 1 favorite out of 20+ girls) and she says "yea I'm available right now". OKAY. Get dressed, drive to the mall. She is so cute, modest, studying medical science and very petite. Super positive, my perfect match really. I think she's really into me she actually called me and is texting me throughout the night, so I will def's hit her up again.

I went to another date after that which was fine, not my type, I think she was super nervous, but okay chat.

I have 2 more dates on Saturday and another on Sunday with pretty attractive girls.

I just got back from a massive chest + tri session at the gym, never had so much energy, and I'm shredding weight like crazy, 1kg in 3 days. Fuck it's just been a really really good day. Why would I play games and ruin all this????

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So I just realised there is a social event for uni on in about an hour. It would be easy to get ready and go but do I want to?

My confidence is so low around my uni classmates, even lower than it is around strangers. I've known them all for 4 years and it is very clique-ey, plus I only have 1 or 2 friends whom I could talk to and I don't want to bother them too much.

I used to be friends with many of them before my gf. I don't know why I put so much pressure on myself for their validation but I don't like being around them for that reason. 

Go to uni thing, go to aikido or sit at home.

I walk into the bar and everyone is in their little groups that they have been in for 4 years and I stand around and talk to other guys with no friends in the class. Thats what happened last time. They are just not my type of people (design students).

I didnt go to sleep until 4am last night - late night coffee dates messed me up.

You know what though, I am pushing myself harder everyday - and I am doing well for myself. I have 2 dates tomorrow and 1 on Sunday.

I should go for networking though. I'll get sressed and see how I feel. If I don't like it I can just go home.

 

Update: went there, yes it was as stupid as I thought it would be. Cliques sitting in circles drinking. Spoke to some faculty staff and my 2 friends then went the fuck home was there for about 5 minutes. I don't need that shit in my life atm. I don't know why it makes me so angry - I guess it's because nobody wants to talk to me, they just go on their phones and dont really engage or respond when they ask them something.

I know its not me because my dates are going awesome, my friends enjoy talking to me and I don't get disrespected at the dojo like that.

Also all these Pokémon GO players! Makes me sick to my stomach. I dont make many friends because I'm different but shit like that makes me happy to be different. I just want to work harder and beat everyone as the underdog. 

I mean when we are dragging ourselves up from the bottom its not so good to be around arrogant peoples like that. I'm not where I want to be but I'm proud of myself and don't want my self-esteem to go down like that. I knew it was a bad idea to go.

Edited by play_time_is_over
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My big problem is I'm afraid of Hard Work. I find side orojects to procrastinate that seem productive (im learning to model etc) but at the end of the day it's still time wasting from my main goal.

My problem is I don't workhard enough. Work harder, work harder, work harder. Take the next step. 

Also my 2 dates flaked on me but I am not upset, I arrnged them too early on in the week.

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True Cameron I should not crush myself for only doing 3 hrs of work instead of 6. 3 > 0.

 

Rightnow Inmm totally crushed. 5 dates and one girl I really liked and was dumb enough to let myself like her. The date went really well, multiple signs she liked me and she is exactly who I'd want in a gf.

Then I try to arrange the second date thinking its a sure thing but she just comes back with she's too busy.

Thats fine - maybe she is too busy. Then again its highly probably she just doesn't want to meet again. That's whats killing me. I thought everything went really well, I looked great, we had a great time. Why?!?!?!?! I know you can't be bithered by those things, for example the other 4 dates went horribly but I don't blame myself. Just this girl I really wanted to get to know. Oh well.

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Sup, did you try to arrange the second date during the first date?

Yes, multiple times.

I said she can get me a coffee next time she laughed and said okay. Then she texted me after thanking me for the coffee and asking if Liked Doctor Who? I said I never seen it and she can show me one day and she was like "okay! :)"

She texted me a few more times so I thought the 2nd date wld be easy to arrange. Called her up "Ill see if Im busy" not a good sign. "Yes sorry I'm busy Tuesday. Really sorry!".

In one hand I feel like she doesnt like me, I should move on. She's letting me down politely.

On the other hand I realise I'm just a stranger to her, maybe she really is busy, and right now she isn't available.

I wil try one more time in a few days. Because the signs are very mixed. Usually Id drop it but out of the 20+ girls Ive been talking to shes the only one I want to see again.

 

fuck honestly I'm about to break. No matter how hard I try I just lack "something" like some kind of virility or passion for life which repels people. So many emotional ups and downs. I've never been so close to relapsing than right now.. just play a few games and get back on the horse tomorrow.............!

Edited by play_time_is_over
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I wouldn't recommend to set up the next date during a date (not even mentioning like a joke). Use this advice for your future dates.

Why? You are not supposed to need to one. For the second date you simply wait a week or two and ask her out again.

How was the first date? Usually both people can feel if it went good or not.

She went out with you during the first date. That's a good sign. Give her some time then ask her out again.

 

 

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