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Piotr journal


Piotr

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12 hours ago, hycniejsy said:

Good one for this year. Thinking is good, but still try and experience with new things. That microcontroller one looks nice, I don't know a shit about it and most people don't. So you can solve their problems or needs with thing like that, saving their time. Isn't that a great one, mate? :)

Yes, it is. It provides a lot of technical possibilities. It's funny that you mentioned it. I had a talk with my brother in law today, I told him about my business idea using my microcontroller knowledge. Maybe the universe is trying to tell me something?

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Transcendency journal
entry #7

    The day before yesterday, I failed at my daily routine. This made me feel kinda ashamed, as this year motive for me is transcendency and in order to accomplish this, I can't neglect anything that leads me to a better life. This failure gave me a momentum to do everything which I had to do for yesterday, despite being very tired. Also, some kind of inspiration hit me and I wrote this thought which is very inspiring for me(thus I'm putting it in my sig).

I care about my future, thus I'm making a great use of today!

Daily routine check for day before yesterday:
Non-dominant hand writing               - failed
Affirmation                                         - failed
Reading                                            - failed
Physical activity                                - failed
Healthy eating                                  - done

Daily routine check for yesterday:
Non-dominant hand writing               - done
Affirmation                                         - done
Reading                                            - done
Physical activity                                - done
Healthy eating                                  - done

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Transcendency journal
entry #8

    Going strong!  No place for procrastination.

Daily routine check for day before yesterday:
Non-dominant hand writing               - done
Affirmation                                         - done
Reading                                            - done
Physical activity                                - done
Healthy eating                                  - done

Daily routine check for yesterday:
Non-dominant hand writing               - done
Affirmation                                         - done
Reading                                            - done
Physical activity                                - done
Healthy eating                                  - done

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Transcendency journal
entry #9

    Relapsed. Whats worse I'm having flu syndromes, feeling ill. Coincidence? I don't think so...

Daily routine check for day before yesterday:
Non-dominant hand writing               - failed
Affirmation                                         - failed
Reading                                            - failed
Physical activity                                - done
Healthy eating                                  - done

Daily routine check for yesterday:
Non-dominant hand writing               - done
Affirmation                                         - done
Reading                                            - done
Physical activity                                - done
Healthy eating                                  - failed

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I fine it interesting that you use done and failed not success and failed or done and not done.  I find personally setting goals that require 100% perfection set me up for failure and self-hatred.  I am human and I will not get it right every day.  We get ill, life happens, you oversleep, a great opportunity arises and you set aside your habits to take advantage of it.  I aim for 95% and it is less stressful and lets me focus not on those times I am not perfect but all the many times I am successful.  Do you find this to be true also?

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On 6.02.2018 at 8:32 AM, Kad said:

I fine it interesting that you use done and failed not success and failed or done and not done.  I find personally setting goals that require 100% perfection set me up for failure and self-hatred.  I am human and I will not get it right every day.  We get ill, life happens, you oversleep, a great opportunity arises and you set aside your habits to take advantage of it.  I aim for 95% and it is less stressful and lets me focus not on those times I am not perfect but all the many times I am successful.  Do you find this to be true also?

You pointed out a very important aspect!

Firstly, I don't beat myself up if tasks are failed because of being ill or if some more important things pops up. It's more about having track on my activity, whether this "failing" comes from prioritizing or procrastination. In my opinion, it's very basic and at the same time very precious ability, to distinguish these two bolded words.

Secondly, I used that combination of words(done-failed) on purpose. Because word failed, sounds more "aggresive" to me; thus it better points me out, that something was neglected. I prefer word "done" than "success", because the latter sounds for me like something big or groundbreaking was achieved and those activities aren't anything like that. They are just a basic tasks that are a standard to do in order to achieve a better life.

Thirdly, yes, going for perfection, maybe not sets me on failure, but makes me neglect other aspects of my life. An example of that is my exam panic, often when I study for a big exam I go for perfection and start to think that I know nothing(although I already know everything I need). I'm reading on things that aren't in the field of my exam, I re-wrote my notes etc. This ruins my day, because I'm doing things that I don't need and neglecting other activities in the name of studying. It's just as stupid as "killing in the name of god".

Hope you get my point. Greetings!

Piotr

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Transcendency journal
entry #10

    I'm starting a new job this Monday and I'm a little anxious about it. New people, new places - this makes me think whether I will fit in. But I try to move that thought aside and just go strong, because I fight for better life. This job change allowed me to move back to my hometown, it's great to be closer to my family! I try to hold on to that thought, that whatever this job will look like, it brings me benefits on many areas of my life.

Daily routine check for day before yesterday:
Non-dominant hand writing               - done
Affirmation                                         - done
Reading                                            - done
Physical activity                                - failed
Healthy eating                                  - done

Daily routine check for yesterday:
Non-dominant hand writing               - failed
Affirmation                                         - failed
Reading                                            - failed
Physical activity                                - done
Healthy eating                                  - done

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  • 3 weeks later...
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Transcendency journal
entry #12

    Wikipedia:

Quote

Futurists are motivated by change. They are not content merely to describe or forecast. They desire an active role in world transformation.

I desire an active role in world transformation.

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Transcendency journal
entry #15

   Goal for the weekend: being social - ACHIEVED.

I've had a great time with people from my study group. We were barbecuing over the lake, drinking beer and laughing with great music in the background. No game could give such a good feeling like this.

I was thinking about some aspects of my life which needs a change. I know that quitting games is only a beggining of a larger story. Improvement must continue - it's an ongoing process. I know that things are going right way, but still I'm a bit anxious how things will go.

Have you had a minute to think about what you need to change? Reply here.

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Transcendency journal
entry #16

Need help.

    Feeling depressive. Although I don't game, I'm social, doing productive things, achieving goals; it all gives like a very short feeling of fullfillness and happiness. After which comes much longer feeling of emptiness. I feel like my mind is broken. What should I do? Please give me a word of advice.

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  • 1 month later...

Transcendency journal
entry #17

    Shit. My journal got really dusty... Going strong with studying, getting new diet to gain few kilos and new training plan. Having some plans which I hope I will insert into my life in near future(around month from now). Lets fight for better life!

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  • 2 weeks later...

Transcendency journal
entry #18

Days gaming free: 0
Days procrastination free: 0

    It supposed to be a transcendency year, but instead I've relapsed. Funny thing is, that I've managed to achieve all the planned tasks. Unfortunatelly, some spare time lead to relapse, which to someone unfamiliar with gaming addiction might seem like nothing, because it didn't had negative impact on my life. Still, I feel bad because of that time which is now gone, which could be used for something productive which brings result and not increase my kill counter.

I crave to do things which give results, which are productive. The struggle starts again this week!

Edited by Piotr
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Transcendency journal
entry #19

Days gaming free: 2
Days procrastination free: 2

    Yesterday I've went to the gym and signed up for three trainings a week. I've also talked with personal trainer which will make a training plan and diet for me. I hope that this will increase my commitment into my personal development.

Today, nothing much happened. I had to stay additional hour in my work. Spent some time with my gf and now I'm trying to get my tasks done. Just one of many boring days in my life. :15_yum:

WARNING: Don't read following spoiler if you feel prone to cravings or relapse.

Spoiler

An awful thought hit me today, which still is stuck in my head. Life is short, so I should do things that makes me happy. So why not to game?
What scares me about it, is that I know that gaming will ruin my life. My logical mind knows it. Somehow, it feels that gaming will fill my life with happiness. I know that this would be temporary, but nothing in real life is permament either. I know that all my gaming achievements would be just some "server data" and it wont have any real life value... Still... It feels appealing... It must be just some side effect of last relapse... I have to make this thought go out of my head... I have to fight my addiction...

 

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Transcendency journal
entry #20

Days gaming free: 3
Days procrastination free: 3
PM free: 3

    I went to the gym today. Received my training plan and diet. I was a bit stressed(anxious) about how will my first training go, but my trainer was very kind and explained every move to me. This way anxiety quickly turned into feeling of positive excitment. I'm getting my physical activity and nutrition into a completely new(higher) level - something completely opposite to what I would done when I was gaming. I'm really proud of that, despite the feeling of... missing gaming(which I'm not proud to feel; ashamed in fact).

Edited by Piotr
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  • 1 year later...

Transcendency journal
entry #21

Long time no... Entries...

Over a year have passed since I've last wrote. Gaming wasn't an issue since then, only few, minor, 15 minutes relapses. This didn't affect my life in negative way, but still, better activities could be done.

Sometimes I have a feeling of emptiness, like something is missing in my life. I desire a calm life, yet it is impossible to always omit negativity. It would be nice to have my own business but I'm so afraid that it will fail, and I won't have any funds to support myself.

Just a quick share of my chaotic thoughts to ease my mind.

Thank you all, who read this!

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Great that you're not having issues with games. You say you desire calm life, yet would be nice to have your own business... these two arent't likely to go together.

But the thing that's missing... we have a need to strive. Calm and comfort make things pleasant, but rob us of the ability to chase our dreams.

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Transcendency journal
entry #22

Ok... So I couldn't omit that one... RuneScape - shadow of my past...

Although I very much enjoyed it and even now I sometimes crave it, I know it was that game that made me hook to computer. From my experience with it, company behind this game used many psychological aspects to make you play more and now pay more. Since the leaving of original creators of the game, it really went downhill, into the treacherous practices. To all players of this game, be conscious about what this game brings, because in my case, it was only lost time where I could have my childhood, make friends, learn new skills, improve my social skills, maybe have a girlfriend, improve my finances, spend time with my family, create better life and the list go on...

There is always a better thing to do, than gaming!

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

Transcendency journal
entry #23

I was playing,
and better things could be done during that time...

I want to play,
but I know I shouldn't...

I will want to play,
but I hope I won't do it...

I want to thrive,
yet I'm afraid of taking leap in my life...

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