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Nick's Daily Journal


Falky

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Day 57 - Feeling Chilled Out

Today is going to be a short journal entry (I'm saving my words for my article I'm writing today lol). Anyhow. Yesterday went great. I smashed the exercise, diet, Spanish, work and it felt pretty good.

Before I come to write this I started on my article. So now I have no excuses not to work. After I finish writing this, I will be going straight onto writing and I'm doing what I said yesterday and that's to get straight to work.

Oh yeah Game update...I've been getting quite a few urges to play games recently. I think this is because my mind is focused on resisting foods, exercising and sticking to the new healthy regime I've set up. I'm really exercising my willpower muscles lately :D

It's coming up to the two month mark I'm feeling pretty good :), the last month of the detox I'm going to try and allocate the willpower to my work and see how that goes.

What I'm Grateful For:

  • Silence
  • The Sun
  • Cold Drink

Today's Agenda:

  • Learn Spanish
  • Exercise For 23 minutes
  • Write In Journal
  • Start On Latest Article.

Fat Loss Section - Day 16

Everything is on track at this moment in time. I just need to remain consistent, have patience and trust the process. I'm planning to lose 2 pounds this week so I may drop my calories by around 100 tomorrow on-wards.

I'm currently at 2280 calories to lose weight...in fact I may actually drop it by 200. but if i carry on losing I'll keep it the same for the moment. I had a really good session on the bike and increased my time to 23 minutes.

I want to eventually go up to 30 minutes a day of moderate intensity. That should be a nice sweet spot for fat loss. obviously combining this with weights.

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I had an direct correlation between watching gaming content on youtube and urges to game. Maybe you want to cut this, so you can focus your willpower on things that are important for you, like getting your work done in a timely matter and getting your eating right. Just some thoughts from the outside ;)

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I had an direct correlation between watching gaming content on youtube and urges to game. Maybe you want to cut this, so you can focus your willpower on things that are important for you, like getting your work done in a timely matter and getting your eating right. Just some thoughts from the outside ;)

I don't watch gaming content mate, the other day was the first time i watched any sort of game play in around a month lol. I do tend to watch a lot of fitness, eating and comedy videos though lol

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Day 58 - Wisdom Tooth...Ouch!

Yesterday I woke up feeling like I've been punched in the mouth an it got worse throughout the day. Last night I couldn't get to sleep because it hurt so much and I ended up falling asleep around 5am, so not good.

Today I'm taking it easy and I've allowed myself the next few days off from exercise and not going to be too strict with my food (ill still keep track though). Today I've spent most of the day just planning for tomorrow's trip down south to the Bovington Tank Museum.

I'm going to try and get some good footage for a VLog or two and hopefully get a video uploaded for Monday. It'll be based around the tanks obviously and majority of the time me talking about my Anxiety. (I have/had agoraphobia)

But yeah it'll be fun to test my anxiety levels. :) I like to challenge my anxiety so i know I'm in charge and the anxiety isn't. Show it who's boss :)

I might possibly be a little bit later with my journal entry tomorrow because I wont have WiFi until we reach the hotel.

Here's my article I wrote if anyone's interested :) - http://falkysolutions.com/gaming-negatives-are-games-bad/

What I'm Grateful For:

  • Mum & Dad
  • Money That I Receive
  • Painkillers

Today's Agenda:

  • Relax
  • Get Ready For The Weekend
  • Learn Spanish
  • Keep On-Top of my social media

Fat Loss Section - Day 17

Everything has been going fine. The next 2 or so days im not going to being strict but im still going to keep track and make sure I don't wreck everything I've done.

Edited by Falky
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Day 62 - Wow, Busy Weekend!

This has been the first time since the detox begun that I've missed an entry. For a good reason too im glad to say. Friday I traveled to the south of England to visit the Bovington Tank Museum for Tiger day with 3 other friends. This was a massive milestone for me, because it was the first time I had been away from family and my fiancee. I've been so crippled in the past and in my teenage years because of Agoraphobia, this was a major step in my journey.

I managed to tick two things off of my bucket list too and that was to:

  1. Hug My favourite tank and visit the Bovington tank Museum.
  2. See Stonehenge.

I have done more things in the past 4 days than i have in the past 10 years of my life. To say im over the moon is an understatement! The next for me in my journey to beat Anxiety is to visit another country on my own and perhaps with a couple of friends. By the weekend's discussion it could be Germany. :)

I had hardly any sleep over the weekend due to loads of factor's and this normally makes my anxiety worse. For some reason though it wasn't higher at all, perhaps not even there.

So today's Bank Holiday Monday for the UK and im just going to use today as a research and relaxing day. I'll will jot down my objectives for this week also, so I know what im doing each day and what my main goal is for each day.

The only downside to the weekend is im itching real bad to play games =/, so that's not good i just need to keep busy.

Actually this brings me to something I was thinking about over the weekend whilst traveling. When I come to the end of my detox I may try twitch streaming and add that to my passive income streams. My logic is that if I class gaming as work of such, that my subconscious mind will recognise this and kind of limit the amount.

If i can also generate money whilst doing something that's fairly fun to do, then that's great. I'll ponder this thought over the following weeks and see what conclusion I come to.

Twitch gaming in the grand scheme of things is in it's infancy and It could be good to become established now.

What I'm Grateful For:

  • Great Friends
  • History
  • My Confidence
  • My Journey
  • YouTube
  • Internet
  • Spicy Food
  • Cars

Today's Agenda:

  • Lots of Research.
  • Plan the week.
  • Relax

Fat Loss Section - Day 21

Even though I devoured quite a bit of crap food over the weekend and downed a lot of alcohol, I only put on 1 pound. This was perhaps due to the amount of walking I did lol! But anyways back on the health regime tomorrow and smash my next fat loss goal. :)

 

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Falky!  Look who leads an interesting life now!  Your trip to the museum sounds fantastic!  That was a big step to overcoming agoraphobia.  I cope with some social anxiety as well, and it can be harder when I'm around people at my work.  I think that the more exposure therapy you do for yourself, it will only lead to better coping skills.  I find that my anxiety socially hasn't really gone away, but it's manageable.  Interestingly, there are many people i have met at my job and in life that have SA, but I never would have guessed.

Glad to read about your progress, and it certainly has inspired me to continue onward with creating a more fulfilling life.  Cheers!

Danni

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Thanks guys :), another plus is that I'm now in a decent sleeping pattern which is good. I wake up at 5am now, so instead of being a night owl im an early riser. :)

Day 63 - Business As Usual

It's around 6:24 in the morning and I just had a shower. It's nice to wake up, relax, shower and feel energised! Before this routine I would either get woken up or I'd wake up feeling groggy and have to rush to get stuff done.

Even though I would have the hours from 12pm-4am I still don't get the work done that I would like to because of distractions. Waking up at this time allows me to relax and get at least a solid 3 hours of work done before the Mrs gets up lol.

Anyhow. Yesterday went ok...even though I did have a lot of cravings to play games. I just thought of why I'm doing this detox and I'm doing it for myself and no one else. If I played a game now whilst on the last stretch, I would be just sabotaging my efforts and everything I've done so far.

I've learnt so much during this detox about myself and I'm sure I will learn more. Today my plans are simple and will be shown in my daily agenda below. I hope everyone has a fantastic day! I will pop back on later after I've edited my video and help around the forum a little bit.

What I'm Grateful For:

  • The morning sunshine
  • My strength
  • My willpower
  • Life
  • Caffeine 

Today's Agenda:

  • Edit & Upload VLog
  • Research On Twitch Work
  • Learn Spanish for 15 minutes
  • Write In Journal
  • Random Work Tasks
  • Exercise for 23 minutes
  • Water and feed my Bonsai

Fat Loss Section - Day 22

Back onto a more mindful eating and exercise regime today, I've had my fun and it's now time to lose some more fat. I'm starting with my 23 minutes bike riding each day again and sticking to the intermittent fasting.

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Day 64 - Nothing Beat The Sun-Rising

I had no idea what I've been missing out on all of these years. It's beautiful. The way the sun rises up over the horizon and casts a different sort of light than the afternoon variant it casts. With the birds chirping and the sound of silence, it's so relaxing and I can now see why people love waking up at this time.

I'm used to slumping into bed at around 3-4am and thought I enjoyed being a night owl because of the silence. I would wake up the next day and be behind everyone else in the world.

The feeling of getting up before anyone else in the country and making a start feels ten times better than what I was doing before.

Yesterday wen't okish. I didn't game but i didn't learn Spanish, workout or eat the way I should have. This is the trouble with a weekend off. I tend to become stuck and it takes a lot of willpower to reestablish the healthy routine I was in.

I'm not sure what I'm going to do today but i feeling the urge to game creep in slowly, so i'm going to think of something quickly to do to stop the urges.

What I'm Grateful For:

  • Sunrise
  • Birds
  • My Willpower
  • Songs

Today's Agenda:

  • Work
  • Research
  • Plan

Fat Loss Section - Day 23

I need to get back on track somehow, suppose I should just do it instead of thinking about it.

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Hey man,

if you have 1 or 2 bad "Fat Loss" days once in a while its not that big of a deal. It will happen but the important thing is to not let you get dragged down by that bad day, and then stop completely. Just recognize it and feel ok with it, but then move on and stick with your diet plan the following days.

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Hey man,

if you have 1 or 2 bad "Fat Loss" days once in a while its not that big of a deal. It will happen but the important thing is to not let you get dragged down by that bad day, and then stop completely. Just recognize it and feel ok with it, but then move on and stick with your diet plan the following days.

Yup agreed :)

 

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I'm looking forward to see how you get yourself back into the fat-loss routine. Keep it up son

Cheers bro :)

Day 65 - Going To Enjoy The Day

The past couple of days I've done pretty much nothing apart from watch YouTube and Netflix. Is it because of the weekend and I'm still in relaxation mode? Who knows. All I know is that I need to knuckle down and get back to working and the fat-loss.

Today will be the last day that I totally chill out and I'm just going to enjoy the day and not fret over things I haven't done. I think this is the main point to establish. Even though I'm off track, I just realign myself tomorrow and get back to business.

I can do these things, I've proven it to myself with anxiety and the game detox. I have the sort of personality that enjoys completion and perfection. The trouble with this is that if I start a series or a game I tend to stop at nothing until that series or game is completed.

I need to tap into that ability and apply it to my work and personal growth somehow. Hmm. The 90 day detox has worked...so I may need to write down an end date or something to complete the things I need to do.

I've said to myself that I would lose fat in 90 days...but not really a set amount. That's my task today then. I shall write down attainable goals for my fat loss and bit like a game and aim to smash them by a certain date.

But yeah I'm binge watching Sons Of Anarchy at the moment...I'm seriously thinking about just reading a synopsis on the ending so I don't need to watch anymore. I probably wont though lol, I only have 2 seasons to go anyways.

I'm currently sitting here just daydreaming and watching the birds and sun shine down on the bush outside. I may just go back through my journals soon and see how my feelings and emotions have gone.

I need to actually use my brain and focus on myself for once instead of other people's tasks and problems. Instead of doing what other people have done to lose weight, earn money and succeed I need to figure my own way to do it.

I know the way my brain operates is totally different to other people's and i need to channel it somehow! I may do it in this journal actually. My Mrs is out and it's quiet so I'm able to think.

I know for sure that my mind operates best when I'm using my focus on 2 solid things. If I try to establish any other sort of routine or habit I tend to burn out and crash. Thinking back over my life, this is definitely true. Such as when I had a full time job. I would put all my energy into my job and my relationship and thus would neglect friends and fat loss.

Once I crashed and burned, I would become demoralized and become depressed.

So I perhaps need to make a list of things I'm currently doing, what I'm meant to be doing and things I want to do. Then perhaps split each habit I want to establish into a goal and time frame, in such a way that doesn't clash with my other habits and willpower/focus related goals.

I've always tried to do everything at once and haven't once split up things into different time frames. This should also counter my boredom. (I tend to get bored of something easily)

Current Things I'm Doing:

Game Detox (End Date 30.05.2016)

Things I Should Be Doing:

Working

Learning Spanish

Losing Fat

Now I've split the tasks up, I need to pick something to go aside the game detox. I know I need to work, so I may just have to focus on that until the detox ends and then swap in losing fat and give that an end date.

Once the losing fat end date has been reached I then swap over to learning Spanish as by then my fat loss routine should have taken hold. Hmm...wow think I'm on to something here :o

I know for definite that if I give myself an end date for a goal, I will always strive for perfection like i have with the game detox. As long as I don't overload my willpower and focus I believe this will work...actually i don't believe I know it will work!

Beginning from tomorrow on-wards I shall be focusing on 2 main things that allow myself to grow in a certain way. Working & Game Detox will grow my willpower and financial status.

I have to play the long game and I need to pace myself. I have to stop comparing my middle to someone else's end. There will be a point where I have a ripped body with 10% and where I can speak Spanish, Chinese & French and I'm rolling in passive income from my online business. For today though I need to focus on 2 things at a time and make sure I grow each day!

Wow this has been a long entry...when I get in the writing groove I don't stop haha :D

What I'm Grateful For:

  • Game Detox
  • Silence
  • Music
  • The Sun
  • My Brain
  • My Willpower

Today's Agenda:

  • Plan my life properly.
  • Relax
  • Contemplate my life

Fat Loss Section - Day 24

As stated in the previous paragraphs this fat loss section will not be happening until the game detox is over. It will be started from day one again and It will be done properly! After the game detox is done, this journal will primary be for fat loss and other self-improvement goals.

P.S: Congrats on getting this far if you read all of my journal xD

 

 

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Day 66 - Start Of A New Day

It's the start of another new day and I'm feeling good. I spent the majority of yesterday just thinking about life and how my brain works. I came to the conclusion that my own brain can only handle 2 tasks at once, but when I focus on those 2 tasks I tend to smash them and succeed.

So from now on until the end of the detox It's just work and game detox. Today I'm planning to do quite a bit of video editing and perhaps a bit of writing thrown in. Lets see how this goes and how this experiment of mine goes :D

Just a short entry for today.

What I'm Grateful For:

  • Waking Up
  • Caffeine
  • Internet

Today's Agenda:

  • Video Edit at least one video.
  • Write 1k words.
  • Keep up to date on social media
  • Perform Research
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That's a good revelation you had about how your brain works, Falky.  Nosce Te Ipsum, ---> Know Thyself.  I believe that if you can figure yourself out, and what motivates you, you'll feel more in control of your life.  Keep up the great progress, mate!

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That's a good revelation you had about how your brain works, Falky.  Nosce Te Ipsum, ---> Know Thyself.  I believe that if you can figure yourself out, and what motivates you, you'll feel more in control of your life.  Keep up the great progress, mate!

Yup definitely :) thanks.

Day 67 - Lumberjack Falky Lol

I've spent the majority of the day chopping wood up for my parents and organizing it all for my dad to dispose of at a later date. So plenty of fresh air and sunshine for me.

My game cravings have been there but nothing I can't handle. This is due mainly to myself planning for when my detox will end. You see I've come to the conclusion that If I have every other aspect of my life in order and I I'm not using games as a crutch for my emotions, then Twitch Streaming will be a good way to earn passive income whilst also monitoring my game-play time.

I will see how it goes and if it goes well then I will carry on, but if I find it's impacting my life like it did before then I may jump back on another detox. I plan to stream every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday.

Every other day will be majority of my other work and rest. Once this detox is completed then I know games wont ever have a grip over me like they did before. I know I'm in control and I will dictate what I play.

I have another 23 days to go before my 90 is complete and nothing is going to stop me now. No amount of game play footage is going to deter me lol. (I've been on Twitch the past couple of days doing research.)

The future is bright...the future is Falky lol.

At the moment I'm typing this and blasting my music whilst the Mrs is out...bliss. Today has been a great day, I hope your's has been too. :)

Keep up the great work all!

What I'm grateful for:

  • Axes, pew pew
  • Sunshine
  • Fresh Air
  • This Forum
  • The People on this forum

Today's Agenda:

  • Help Parents Out
  • Write In My Journal
  • Research Streaming Stuff

 

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Day 68 - Gardener Falky Today...

Yesterday I chopped wood. Today I chopped grass. My day today was similar to yesterday's day, where I helped my parents with garden work. It was a beautiful day and it was nice to catch some of this lovely British Sun. I then had a nice salad my mum made and walked back and have spent the majority of the afternoon researching Twitch Stuff.

I'm a little bit sad today though because I finished Sons Of Anarchy today :( That show has one of the best soundtracks I've ever heard and it's definitely in my top 5 TV shows. Now I've finished it I may actually get more work done (Y) lol

I'm at the point in my life now where the detox has worked so well...I can now watch game-plays and not have any sort of urge or craving to play. That's a massive step.

Apart from that. Nothing else to report.

What I'm Grateful For:

  • Food
  • Mum's Cooking
  • Sunshine
  • Ice Cold Drinks

Speak to you awesome lot soon :)

 

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Day 69 - Standard Day

I managed to do some work today and a lot of research complete, so pretty good. I've been watching game play pretty much all day and no urges what-so-ever. Excellent :)

This may be the one journal entry where I don't write a full paragraph :o wow lol.

What I'm Grateful For:

  • Rice
  • Internet
  • Friends

Shortest. Entry. Eveerr!

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Day 69 - Standard Day

I managed to do some work today and a lot of research complete, so pretty good. I've been watching game play pretty much all day and no urges what-so-ever. Excellent :)

I am always wondering how this can be possible. Watched a lot of game plays lately bu I use it to procrastinate. The result of this behaviour is that I now have to fight off cravings again :( Guess different people different reactions. I am glad things go your way soon you made it!

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