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ThePerfectApology

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Read this

 if you haven't as it is key to understanding what I am going through. And 

watch this

 also btw.

Interesting links. I like the talk about the growing mindset. I think not to procrastinate isn't easy, it needs energy every time to do the "right" things. And if you do too much "right" things a day it gets harder and harder to force yourself into them. To do this you need to have the right mindset.

There are now two ways to become more effective.

1) You change your life in a way that it costs less energy to do the right things even if they suck and are hard. I count in this category creating habits wich make things easier(clean desk),figure out at a daily plan what is important and do it it first(more motivation more energy)., make use of your natural energy levels.

2)You train your brains capability to force yourself into resisting impulses and to do what you have to do, instead of what your instant gratification monkey says. Here I would sort in some things like meditation training, willpower training, increasing your capability of forcing yourself into something. Also use proudness and appreciation for your achievements as rewards to train your brain faster.

The things under 1) are relatively easy strategys wich can be achieved and implemented in a short time period( maybe 1-4 weeks). The points at 2) need practive over a long time and I think you get better there only gradually. It is really like strenght training. Optimize your training, make  a plan and then stick to do the work and just force yourself to do it. Here is consistency the key. Better do less and do it everyday.

Sorry I know this is a little much for a comment, but i started and had fun structuring my thoughts about this.

PS: another good article about procrastination and strategys against it is this one.

 

 

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Good job scheduling for the next 5 days. Make it a goal to have a few things to go to on the weekends. Is there a farmers market nearby? A social event you could go to? A hike you've wanted to check out?

Hiking trip sounds like a lot of fun, I'll check that out. There are mountains all around where I live so I'm sure there are lots of opportunities. Thanks Cam!

Take a picture and post it here! :D

image1.thumb.JPG.c423113d559be45633306c5

Fantastic photo! It's great that you have such beautiful scenery close to where you live :)

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Day 25 (16/3/2016)

I read somewhere that having the right philosophy is key since it formes your attitude, which forms your opinion, which forms your action, which forms your life. That is all well and good, if you have the right one. If you, like me, have the wrong mindset -which I'm sure a majority of us have - you struggle with everyday things that should be obvious. Not drinking soda is hard, not sleeping in is hard, not procrastinating is hard. Life, your life, is not something you can invest in (at least in your eyes). And that's when you know the instant gratification monkey has taken over.

Read this if you haven't as it is key to understanding what I am going through. And watch this also btw. When I'm doing something unpleasant I can either give up, or continue. Now all logical statements and facts say to never give up, here's a few good quotes to underline my point:

"If you're going through hell, keep going" -Winston Churchill

"Be honest with yourself, and with people. Be punctual, never give up, achieve your goals, even when everything goes bad. -Steve Jobs

"First they ignore your, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win" -Mahatma Gandhi

"I haven't failed, I have just found 10,000 ways that won't work" -Thomas Edison

So why do keep screwing up? Why is it when I'm solving a really hard math problem and I cannot seem to solve it yet, I would rather give up and do something else? Even the smartest scientists haven't truly figured this one out yet. My opinion is that the brain is freaking complex, and you are born without any instruction - manual for it so you gotta figure it out yourself. My conclusion or cure if you would like it is this: "Just do it". Popularized by Nike in the 20th century it will be my new symbol for getting through everyday life. That's right, just fucking do it! Don't listen to your emotions, don't listen to the pain, don't listen to the fatigue, listen to yourself and just fucking do it! Because deep inside you, in your soul, there is a voice which knows what to do. It might get buzzed out by life, but it is still there. And the best way to listen to it is "to just do it!".

 

Fantastic...this is exactly how I approach my life. :) Just DO IT! I also definitely agree about the brain not having a manual either. It' such a complex thing that even nowadays with the technology we have, we don't actually know the brain properly.

Keep up the good work mate and keep that positive attitude! :D 

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Read this

 if you haven't as it is key to understanding what I am going through. And 

watch this

 also btw.

Interesting links. I like the talk about the growing mindset. I think not to procrastinate isn't easy, it needs energy every time to do the "right" things. And if you do too much "right" things a day it gets harder and harder to force yourself into them. To do this you need to have the right mindset.

There are now two ways to become more effective.

1) You change your life in a way that it costs less energy to do the right things even if they suck and are hard. I count in this category creating habits wich make things easier(clean desk),figure out at a daily plan what is important and do it it first(more motivation more energy)., make use of your natural energy levels.

2)You train your brains capability to force yourself into resisting impulses and to do what you have to do, instead of what your instant gratification monkey says. Here I would sort in some things like meditation training, willpower training, increasing your capability of forcing yourself into something. Also use proudness and appreciation for your achievements as rewards to train your brain faster.

The things under 1) are relatively easy strategys wich can be achieved and implemented in a short time period( maybe 1-4 weeks). The points at 2) need practive over a long time and I think you get better there only gradually. It is really like strenght training. Optimize your training, make  a plan and then stick to do the work and just force yourself to do it. Here is consistency the key. Better do less and do it everyday.

Sorry I know this is a little much for a comment, but i started and had fun structuring my thoughts about this.

PS: another good article about procrastination and strategys against it is this one.

 

 

Thanks for the great advice, I especially like the part on making a plan to get greater willpower! I will definitely try that.

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Day 28 (19/3/2016)

Today was really depressing. My family left for their easter holiday while I chose to stay home, for some reason. I still did my meditation though and I took a long walk and drank lots of water. God, I wish I went with them. Just thinking about it makes me sad.

I watched a Ted talk today, which talked about how relationships are the key ingredient to a happy life. I can believe that. In fact, I know it is to be true. That's why I need to get out of the house a couple of times these 10 days I'm alone, so I won't loose my mind.

My biggest fear right now is my future. I quit school for all the right reasons: bad teachers, irrelevant subjects, teenagers sitting all class browsing Facebook. Now I can do 5-6 hours of math on KA Monday through Friday, investing in myself. My goal is to become a professional in artificial intelligence, but to do that I have to do a lot of statistics, programming and math. I just wish I could know if the dots would connect in the future.

I have taken the lonelier road in life. My childhood friends are all either working as apprentices for some craft, or going to school. They like to laugh behind my back now, calling me that weird kid who couldn't finish school like everybody else. But I always thought there was something more to life, you know? Something else than just growing up, getting a family and then die?

 When I am in pain I like to resist it, fight it, fend it off. Just for another day. Or month. Or year. Perhaps that's why I played video games. To cover up the fact that I had no purpose in life. By embracing the pain and the sorrow, not running away from it like I used to, I feel like I have become stronger.

I really hope this Udacity nanodegree is gonna work out. Some people might say "oh, you're not going to a university, you must be stupid". I will show them otherwise. I will be one of many to come that will educate themselves from home. I have already experienced the world, met different people, tried different cultures. That's a big part of why many people go to university and I don't need it. I need knowledge, I need time and I need purpose.

Gratitude journal:

-grateful for the fact that I am in a position where I can help people in the future

-food on the table

-cash to buy living necessities

-access to heating

-21th century

-nice dog 

-warm water

-clothes

 

Quote of the day: some people die when they reach 25, but don't get buried until they are 70. -Benjamin Franklin

 

 

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Yep, getting out of your house is KEY. If I stayed home all day I would go crazy too - we all would. What are some things you can do this week to get out of the house?

Hmmmm.... take lots of long walks, visit my neighbors, maybe hitting up the local swimming hall. I'll insert it into my calendar, and plan my next weekend too.

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Day 30 (21/3/2016)

Have had some rough days lately but still not playing games. Watched a movie called Groundhog Day this afternoon and it got me in a really good mood. Good night ????

Gratitude journal:

-earl grey tea

-money saved

-going to the military

-warm house

-John Lennon 

-my own piano <3

-amazing grandparents

-rain (washes the car for me)

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Bill Murray is amazing is he not? Love that man. Another movie that he and Scarlett Johansen are in called "Lost in Translation" is really good too. Very artsy. It'll take a few watches to really absorb it all.

I've only watched one movie where he acts, but yeah he seems really good! That movie is actually on netflix so I'll definitely check it out.

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Hey keep it going mate.

I just read your journal. Looked 2 movies up that were mentioned. Read your experiences. Became indulged in your struggling, not in a bad way, but because you are giving me a really positive vibe that you are more then capable to do this. 

Look forward, stay strong.

Rick

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Hey keep it going mate.

I just read your journal. Looked 2 movies up that were mentioned. Read your experiences. Became indulged in your struggling, not in a bad way, but because you are giving me a really positive vibe that you are more then capable to do this. 

Look forward, stay strong.

Rick

Thank you for the kind words friend, I really appreciate it :)!

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Day 32 (23/3/2016)

Sometimes I feel like I have lost the ability to think for myself, which has led me to indulge in dogma. Dogma can be a scary thing (lies put down by other people as truth), since it gives you faulty logic. And faulty logic can be a real pain when changing your life. My best example of faulty logic is how much math I'm doing after quitting school: 4 - 6 hours every single weekday. I've always heard people say "more is better, study as much you can", but I have now understood that this is wrong. It is much better to work 3 effective hours 5 days a week, than 6 ineffective hours 5 days a week. Because my brain starts messing up after 3 hours, I start doing silly mistakes and so on. 

Gratitude journal:

-chair for my piano

-pencils 

-full moon

-birds chirping outside

-great TedTalks

-parents

-family

 

 

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Day 32 (23/3/2016)

Sometimes I feel like I have lost the ability to think for myself

Not to think for yourself is the easy way out. If you game all day and somehow try to get all the things done wich have to be done your ability to really think about something gets lost. But i experienced that it gets better over the detox.

Edited by WorkInProgress
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Day 34 (24/3/2016)

The last couple of days I have noticed a change in my mindset. Not a grand one but more of a subtle difference, where a voice in my head always says "are you investing in yourself by doing this?". Who knows, maybe it has always been there. I have a suspicion though that is has to do with my regular meditations - 10-15 minutes every single day for 26 days - changing my brain chemistry. Finally I can listen to my inner voice more than all the clutter that usually goes through my head!

More positive news

Still not playing games, and have started listening to podcasts while driving. 

Negative news

I was doing too much math per day, so now I am making a productivity chart for myself. It will map out when I start messing up, why I messed up and what I can do to change that in the future.

Gratitude journal

-warm socks

-health

-people of Bhutan changing the world

-snow

-rain

-beautiful full moon

-my own kindle paper white!

-mindset by Carol Dweck!

-comfortable bed

Quote of the day:

"Life is like a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving" - Albert Einstein

Edited by ThePerfectApology
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Day 37 (27/3/2016)

Mottoes 

"Just do it"

Thoughts

I've been reading the science of willpower and it has truly been an inspirational book. You know that feeling when you read about a certain fault or mistake most people make and you say "hey, that's me!". Well, that has happened to me all the time while going through it. Otherwise there isn't that much to say, I have just been trying to follow the advice I have gotten from Respawn and other self - help books, while making my new hobbies and routines stickier. From here on out, I will probably write less like this and instead insert more progress reports and gratitude journals. But until that day comes I'll write some more!

When I was in the US I had this friend called Kelsey. I don't know why I befriended her, or why I hanged out with her, but now when I look back I am glad that I did. Why? Because it taught me that intelligence was nothing and hard work was everything. This girl would literally  would come in and brag about how much she didn't do. "Hey Tor, guess who didn't study for the physics test and got a A?", "Wow I just got this homework done right before class" and so on and so forth. She had so much potential, but she never used it to the fullest. It was one of the saddest things I had ever seen. 

The reason why I remembered all of this was because I was watching an interview with Warren Buffet and he said this: It's better to have a 200 horse-power engine that outputs 200 horse-power than a 500 horse - power engine that outputs a 100. That's how I feel now with regards to Kelsey. She may have had the 500 horse power-engine (referring to brain power of course), but I have the engine that outputs 200 horse power. 

Anyway, I'd like to share one of my favorite poems of all time with you. I'm sure you have heard about it before, but it means a lot to me.

 

The Road Not Taken, by Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

 

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

 

And both that morning equally lay

in leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet know how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

 

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence;

Two roads diverged in a a wood, and I ---

I took the one less travelled by,

And that has made all the difference.

 

Progress:

-been meditating for a full month now, started on level 1 on headspace

-programming and piano routines are becoming stickier

-lots of water but no soda the last weeks

-currently reading a book called "the science of willpower"

-40 minute walks every single day

-started up my Duolingo spanish again

Quote of the day

"The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday"" -Unknown

Edited by ThePerfectApology
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Day 38 (28/3/2016)

Gratitude journal:

-KhanAcademy

-Great room

-living in Norway

-being alive

-fresh air

-paper to use creativity with

-calculator

-printer

-amazing parents

-rain

Still no gaming, finished the science of willpower, will start doing self - experimentation with my current routines and willpower exercises.

 

Edited by ThePerfectApology
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